Razor's Edge (Afflictions) (14 page)

"Extra clothes for you. Looks like I’m taking you sledding."

She jumps and screams her excitement as she darts to my Hummer.

After throwing her bag into the back, I help her into the passenger seat. "We have to make a couple of stops first. Is that okay with you?"

She nods. 

I hop into the driver’s seat and get the heat going.

She smiles at me. "So where we going?"

"Panera Bread. I have to take a friend of mine some cream of broccoli soup. You hungry?"

"Yeah. Is your friend sick?" She reaches into the glove box and pulls out her CD case that she keeps in my car then takes out Rihanna. I hate that woman’s voice, but she loves her, so I put up with it.

"Something like that."

              Sixteen

Shay

“Because she’s stubborn." Leaning on her desk, Bebe smiles and holds the phone to her ear. "No, bro. I’m not getting in the middle of this." She pauses and rolls her eyes.

Shaking my head, I glance down at the paper in front of me. Gretchen Myers. She came into the shop yesterday and filled out an application while I was getting sick in the bathroom. Tryst talked to her and is convinced she’d be a good replacement for him. He’s going on tour with Morgan’s band this summer. I’m going to need more than her help since I told Gary he’s not allowed back.

That fight between him and Morgan put things in perspective. So what if more than half my clients leave me? It’s better than him running into Ben every time he’s here, and from what my son has told me, he has no interest in knowing Gary.

"No! I love you. But you’re such a fucking asshole."
Bebe throws the phone on her desk and sighs. "I swear, Shay. He’s thirty-four but acts like he’s twelve." She shakes her head and gets her gun ready for her next appointment. "He wants me to persuade you to let him come back. Like I’m going to side with him or something. He may be family, but he’s crossed too many lines." She narrows her brows, then opens her drawer and sets the picture of her next tattoo on an easel. "What he did was no way to act around clients, and most importantly Ben."

I take a deep breath and try to hide my elation.

"You know, Ben asked me why he’s back. I told him he missed him." She opens and slams drawers at her station shaking her blonde and fuchsia head. "His eyes when he told me that he didn’t want Gary here, were… I can’t do this anymore." She throws her hands into the air. "I’m tired of covering up for that asshole. We all know he’s bound to go back to prison, and I don’t want my nephew to hurt anymore." She spins around so I can see the anger and helplessness in her blue eyes.

"Now you know how I feel."

"And how do you feel?" She comes toward me and quirks a brow. Her whole demeanor changes, going from pissed off to instantly curious. Manic much?

"What do you mean?" Isn’t it obvious how I feel about Gary? I hate the bastard.

"I don’t mean everyone’s favorite asshole." She sighs and leans up against the counter. "I mean Morgan. We could pour cement over him and he could become our statue of a Greek god. Add a little bit of class to the joint. He’s becoming a permanent lunchtime fixture around here anyway. I wanna know why."

And that bit of info she’s not getting out of me. At least not until I’m four months along. "I don’t know why he comes. He just—"

"Oh no you don’t." She shakes a finger in my face. "You were avoiding him for weeks and now he’s here every day. Don’t play me, girl. Spill."

"He’s just a friend,
Bebe. Leave it be."

"Just a friend? Huh?” She leans against the counter and smirks. “Friends don’t make a special time to see you every
single
day."

"In case you haven’t noticed, it’s going on one, and he’s not here." Maybe she’s right. I do kind of hate the fact that he’s not here, and if he was just a friend, I should be able to go a day without seeing him. But he promised to bring me lunch. I could order a pizza or go for takeout, but that’s not the point. I feel let down. That’s something Gary would do.
Let me down with no call. Have me wondering where he is and why he skipped out on a promise. And it sucks.

"I wouldn’t say that."
Bebe laughs and points out the window.

His Hummer comes to a stop in front of my shop.

He kept his promise!
My stomach dances, and I can’t help the smile that is forming across my face.

"Ha!"
Bebe points a finger in my face. "See, that’s the look right there. Girl, you got it bad."

"Shut it. Or he’ll hear you." Picking up the phone, I dial Gretchen Myers so
Bebe will end the convo before Morgan walks in.

It rings.

Bebe shakes her head on her way back to her station to finish setting up for her next client.

Maybe I should give the guy some credit. He’s not Gary. The man has proven that he’s not the type of guy to desert his responsibilities, and this pleases me more than it should. There is something between us other than the baby. I can feel it. It was there when we first met. All this time we’ve been spending together has made me change my mind. I
kinda do wish he was my boyfriend.

Still ringing.

Too bad he has no interest in seeing where this thing could go.

Too bad my life is too messed up to see if this thing could be good.

Even though I would jump at the chance to be with Morgan, I know it’s not possible. I can’t give myself up to a man. Not now. But a part of me wants me to say fuck it. Forget about everything besides Ben, Morgan, and this baby. Let him take charge. It would all be too easy.
And… consuming.

Gretchen’s voicemail kicks on. "I’m not here. Drop a message and I’ll hit you back."

"Good afternoon, Gretchen. This is Shay, from Razor’s Edge. I want to know if you’d like to come in for an interview..." I leave my contact info and hang up as I stare out the window of my shop.

Morgan helps a little girl out of his Hummer. She looks like him, but with blonde hair. Is it his niece that he sometimes takes care of? This little girl looks like she could be his daughter. He never mentioned having a daughter. For a moment I wonder what our baby will look like. Ben looks like me. The only feature he inherited from Gary, other than his artistic ability, is his eyes. Would our son or daughter look like me, or Morgan?

He smiles at her as she smacks his hand away from the seatbelt. Like he thinks it’s funny that the little girl has an independent streak. She hands him the brown bag I’m assuming is my lunch, and he helps her down from the Hummer.

The bell rings.

Morgan and the little girl enter the shop. She can’t be any older than ten. Morgan smiles and holds up a bag as he walks to the counter.

"Panera’s best. Cream of broccoli bread bowl. And there’s a grilled cheese in there for Ben." He sets it on the counter and removes his black and red winter coat. He has on matching snow pants and I wonder for a minute if he just got back from taking the little girl sledding or snowboarding.

It’s wrong of me to be utilizing his time like I am. Now I feel guilty about the thought I had earlier. Morgan keeps his promises. Clearly he was late because he was spending time with this cute little girl. At least it wasn’t spent with someone like Paula.

I, with no grace whatsoever, tear into the bag, practically ripping it to shreds to get at my food. I can’t help it. I’m starving, and the box of
Cheez-Its I was snacking on earlier wasn’t helping. They needed sour cream.

Morgan leans against the counter. "Shay, this is my niece,
Dani." He turns around to look at her because she’s hiding behind him. "It’s okay. Shay’s nice. Remember? I told you in the car."

She peers at me around Morgan’s back. Big, curious-but-scared hazel eyes look at me.
Why is a ten year old scared about meeting someone new?

Her voice is a soft whisper. "Y-you’re beautiful. U-uncle
Morg was right."

I choke on the bite of bread that I’m chewing.
Morgan said that to her?

Morgan grins.

I wonder what Morgan told her.
"Thank you, Dani. You’re a beautiful girl yourself."

She ducks behind Morgan again.

Poor girl.
"Do you like to draw?" I reach into the drawer that holds Ben’s drawing stuff. He’s upstairs playing his Xbox, but something tells me she won’t want to go play with him.

"
Dani." Morgan turns around and bends down. "Remember what I said before about giving people a chance—"

"
It’s okay, Morgan." I set the drawing stuff down on the desk. "Maybe she doesn’t like to draw. I could go ask Ben if she can use his DS."

I go to stand, and the little girl reaches out and takes the paper and colored pencils. "All I can draw is dogs."

I smile down at her. "Well, dogs are my favorite animals."

She looks up at me and smiles wide. "Really? My dad said he’d buy me a dog when we move."

"What kind?"

"A greyhound. What kind of dog is your favorite? I can draw you one."

"I like huskies."

"Actually, got a date with a sled hill." Morgan looks at
Dani then back at me. He pulls at his lip ring. He does it as a nervous habit. "We only came by to drop off lunch."

Dani
places the paper and colored pencils back on the desk in front of me.

"Too bad.” I open the drawer and put Ben’s drawing stuff away. “Maybe you could come back sometime and draw that picture. I’d really like a husky drawing for my desk."

Her smile is bright, and she slowly nods. "I’d like that too. Maybe after Uncle Morg takes me sledding? You’re a nice la–"

"Morgan!" Ben comes flying out of the back and hugs him. He must have seen Morgan’s Hummer outside. "You’re going sledding?"

Oh, shit. He overheard Dani.

Dani
ducks behind me this time, trying to avoid Ben, but peeks around me. 

Ben turns around and smiles back at the little girl he didn’t see when he plowed into Morgan. "Hi."

"Ben, this is Dani. My niece." Morgan squats down to get on his level. "Can you do me a solid and show Dani your X-box while I talk to your mom?"

Ben quirks a brow. "If I do, will you take me sledding?"

My cheeks heat. "Ben."

Morgan holds up his hand. "If it’s okay with your mom. Then yes."

This would solve a ton of problems for me. Ben’s been coming down and interrupting my work all morning. But can I trust Morgan to take him somewhere? Morgan smiles up at me. We’re having a kid together, so I should be able to handle him taking my kid places.

"Sure," I say feeling a tad bit uneasy, but determined to allow him to prove that he can handle the job of taking care of Ben.

"Yay!" Ben bounces.

Dani
flinches.

"Come on,
Dani. You have to see my new game." He takes her by the hand, and she glances up at Morgan, terrified. Ben can be a little too in-your-face sometimes.

"
It’s okay, Dani." Morgan stands and pats her head. "Ben’s a cool kid."

She nods.

“Don’t forget your grilled cheese.” I hand it to him and he takes it. “You need to eat before you go.”

Ben nods and grabs
Dani’s hand. "Come on." He laughs and leads her into the back. “I’ll share my sandwich with you if you’re hungry, or you can have some cookies my mom made last night. They’re awesome!”

She’s walking slow and glances back at Morgan as Ben tugs her along.

Morgan smiles and nods, even gives her a little shoving motion with his hands. He turns to me with an unsure smile on his face. "She doesn’t have many friends. The kids in her neighborhood think that she’s weird."

“How awful.” I was bullied. I had these horrible teeth. Kids called me
Snaggle-puss until braces fixed the problem. Years later, the name still stuck when I’d bump into old classmates on the street. “I don’t think she’s weird. She’s a nice little girl, and that’s a shame."

Morgan leans against the counter and goes to say something as the bell rings. Instead of talking, he glances at the door.

Sasha comes in. She takes one look around and heads over to Bebe’s chair.

I lean over my food and whisper to Morgan. "Now
that
girl is weird. She hardly talks and some of the looks she gives you, it’s like she’s looking right through you and into your soul. Bebe is the only one who deals with her."

“I brought you these, too." Morgan pulls out a pack of bite-sized Twix from his
jacket’s inside pocket, and places it on the counter.

"How did you know Twix is my favorite candy?"

He smiles and it reaches his blue eyes. He comes around the counter and opens my bottom drawer, then drops in his donation. "I saw your stash." He shuts the drawer then moves behind me. His hands land on my shoulders, and he kneads out the tension in my neck.

I stiffen and glance at
Bebe working on Sasha’s hip. They both are turned away from us. Why is he showing me affection? We’re just friends.

"Relax," he whispers in my ear. "You have a huge knot in your neck.”

I sigh and try to do as he says. It’s not easy. His hands on me—rubbing me, caressing me—have shivers of pleasure shooting south. His fingers are magic. They work in circles and have just the right amount of pressure to be soothing but not hurtful. My head rolls. He moves down in between my shoulder blades.

Goosebumps skate down my arms.

God, this friend shit is killing me. A woman could fall in love with his hands alone. He’s going to make someone very happy one day. Is it a crime to wish it was me?