Reason to Breathe (29 page)

“Seriously?” she asked in disbelief. “Wow, I
didn’t think he was like that.”

“Neither did I,” I agreed. “And he swears
he’s not and that he didn’t
do anything
. But he couldn’t
tell me what he did. Maybe I really don’t want to know.”

“I do,” she exclaimed.

“Sara!” I looked at her, astounded. “He can
do whatever he wants with whomever he wants. It’s none of our
business.” Needing to change the subject, I asked, “What’s going on
with you and Jason? How was your
alone time
?”

Sara sighed and fell on her back. It was not
the reaction I was expecting.

“What?! Tell me!” I demanded impatiently.

“You and Evan did more on that couch last
night than Jason and I have. Well, except we’ve kissed and even
that took forever,” she confessed in frustration.

“What do you mean?”

“I know what you think of me,” she glanced
over at me and my eyes apologized again. “But I don’t care; I like
sex. He won’t touch me. I don’t know what to do. I don’t think he’s
into me.” The sorrowful disappointment resounded in her voice. I
wasn’t sure how to console her.

“Do you still like him?’’

“I’m not sure of that either.” After a moment
in silence, she cautiously brought up, “So, we never got to talk
about what happened the other night with your mom showing up at the
game.”

“I’d rather not,” I blurted. “It’s just too
much to think about.” I didn’t want to let myself go back there to
that night, or any other that involved my mother. It was too
painful.

Sara respected my withdrawn response without
a word. She glanced at the clock next to her bed and asked, “What
time is Evan picking you up?”

“Ten-thirty,” I told her and then glanced at
the clock too. “Sara, he’s going to be here in an hour. I need to
take a shower. But we’re not done talking about you and Jason.
We’ll talk about it tomorrow, okay?”

“Okay,” she sighed.

Evan arrived at exactly ten-thirty – I was
barely ready.

“What are we doing today?” I asked, feeling
the warm November sun on my face through the car window as we drove
away from Sara’s.

“Don’t worry, I’ll show you.”

When we pulled into his driveway, I was
surprised to find a silver BMW parked there as well. I’d never seen
another car in his driveway before. Then it struck me that someone
else was home. Could I possibly face his parents after my
humiliating performance last night?

“Who’s home?” I asked, hoping he’d tell me,
no one
.

“My mom. Don’t worry, we probably won’t see
her.”

The words were barely out of his mouth when
the kitchen door opened and his mother stepped out to greet us.

“Or maybe you will,” Evan corrected in
surprise.

Vivian was dressed in wide legged black pants
with a fitted blue turtleneck sweater that flattered her petite
figure. I couldn’t get over how refined she looked, even without
all the glitz.

“Emily,” she said with a smile, “it’s nice to
see you again.” I smiled cautiously, not understanding the warm
reception. Even Evan was scrutinizing her greeting.

We met her at the bottom of the porch steps
and she gave me a brief embrace. I froze, unable to return it since
it happened so quickly, and I honestly wasn’t expecting it.

“I understand you and Evan have planned to
spend the afternoon together. I think that is wonderful,” she
glowed.

“Mom, what’s wrong with you?”

Vivian looked at him disapprovingly.

“Evan, I’m happy to see Emily again, that’s
all.” She smiled at me apologetically for Evan’s rudeness.

“We’re going in the garage,” he told her,
eyeing her suspiciously.

“It was great to see you,” she said. “Perhaps
you could come over for dinner sometime.”

“Um, that would be nice,” I answered in
shock. I replayed our interaction last night, not understanding why
she was being so nice to me.

I followed Evan into the garage, but instead
of going upstairs to the rec room, he opened the door leading into
the other half of the garage. When we were behind closed doors, he
paused, his eyes flickering in deliberation.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“I have no idea why she’s acting so strange,
and it’s making me really nervous. I’m trying to remember if I said
something, or overheard anything to explain it. I’m sorry if it
made you uncomfortable.”

“I was actually trying to come up with the
same answer,” I admitted. “I was expecting her to despise me after
my humiliating clumsiness last night. Besides, I thought for sure
Catherine would’ve said something.”

He smiled, remembering my departing
comment.

“Oh, I’m sorry about that by the way,” I told
him, looking at the floor.

“What are you talking about?”

“I should have helped you out more than I did
during dinner, instead of laughing. I really wasn’t laughing at
you. I felt bad that you had to put up with her. I was laughing at
how ridiculous she was.”

“Don’t worry about it. You definitely helped
in the end with that priceless exit.” He smiled, and I smiled
back.

“Okay, what are we doing?” I asked, looking
around the expansive space. There were two ride-on lawn mowers, a
jet ski and some other recreational vehicles parked in the
otherwise empty space.

Evan walked over to a black dirt bike and
handed me a red helmet.

“We’re going for a ride,” he said, kicking up
the stand and rolling it toward the large door at the other end. He
pressed a button and the door rolled open.

I watched him, not sure if my legs could
move, let alone about walk.

“Evan, I’m not sure that’s a great idea.”

“Trust me, you’ll love it.” He fastened a
black helmet on his head. I warily walked out to him and slid the
helmet on my head. What the hell was I doing?

Evan helped me fasten the strap and showed me
where to sit and place my feet. He explained that the path was
pretty flat, but to expect to bounce a little. Great, not only was
this my first time on a bike, but this one could potentially throw
me off!

Evan kicked the starter and the dirt bike
revved to life. The explosive rumble caused my heart to falter. It
didn’t help when he throttled it a few times. He motioned for me to
get on. Before I could talk myself out of it, I climbed up and
threw my leg over the seat. I slid closer to his back and put my
hands on his waist. He grabbed my hands and pulled them around him.
Once we started, I understood why.

We sped off through the back field, toward
the woods. My heart pounded against my chest. I gripped him tighter
as we entered the woods and the terrain became bumpier - I could
feel the seat give with each divot and root, still too scared to
enjoy the experience.

Eventually, I became accustomed to the uneven
ride and loosened my death grip. I still kept my arms snugly around
him, knowing that one unexpected bounce and I’d be airborne. I
focused on the trees streaking by and the sun fighting through the
tops of the evergreens. It was brighter in the woods than I
expected, probably because most of the trees were bare, preparing
for winter - despite the unseasonably warm day.

Evan eventually slowed and crawled to a stop.
He shut off the bike and took off his helmet. I sat up and
attempted to do the same. I couldn’t figure out how to take it off,
so I climbed off the bike and asked him to help me. My legs
trembled beneath me.

“Well?” he asked, after removing the helmet
from my head.

I shrugged. “Not bad.”

“What?” he questioned. “You loved it, admit
it.”

“Not really.”

He shook his head and smiled.

“This is nice.” I nodded toward the
glistening clearing with the sunlight dancing along the swaying
overgrown blades and the brook along the bottom of a small hill,
bubbling over rocks before disappearing into the woods.

“I’ve taken some amazing pictures out
here.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen your pictures.
Well, except for the newspaper and the one you submitted for the
calendar.”

“I can show you when we get back if you
want.”

“Sure.”

We walked to the brook and sat at its edge,
mesmerized by the water rippling over the stones.

“My mom showed up at the game the other
night,” I blurted, staring into the water. I wasn’t prepared to say
that, and honestly, I thought I was past it until I inadvertently
found my thoughts drifting there again.

“You must have been happy to see her.”

I let out an uneasy laugh. “I don’t know
about that.”

Evan remained quiet, waiting for me to
continue.

“It was awkward,” I confessed.

“I’m sorry,” Evan replied, not knowing what
else to say. I shrugged dismissively, afraid to reveal more.

He casually took my hand, making my heart
trip. We sat in silence, caught up in the glistening flow of the
water.

“I’m still trying to figure out what my
mother’s up to,” he finally said. “Or it’s possible she could
actually like you.”

“Thanks,” I shot back sarcastically.

“You know what I mean,” he offered, trying to
make me feel better. “It’s not like you talked to her very much
last night. She’s never been this… accepting of anyone before.
She’s really hard to please.”

“I can see that,” I recognized with a slight
nod. “Speaking of which, you were so different at the Jacobs’
house. It was a little strange.”

“How?”

“You seemed… older. You talked more proper
and were almost stiff,” I shared, hoping I didn’t offend him. I
looked over at him to see his eyes moving, considering my
words.

“I guess I never thought about it, but you’re
probably right. It’s most likely from years of having to go to
those things – they’re rubbing off on me. That sucks.”

I let out a short laugh.

“I guess you’ll have to come to more of them
to keep me real,” he suggested, gently nudging my shoulder with
his. I caught my breath at his touch, my mouth posed in a shocked
smile with thoughts of future dinners.

Then I heard a buzzing and a distant chime.
Evan reached in his pocket and took out his cell phone. He read who
was calling on the screen and grinned at me before answering.

“Hi Jake,” he answered. My mouth dropped
open. Evan smiled. He listened for a while, but couldn’t keep the
smile off of his face, occasionally glancing at me.

“Sorry I didn’t tell you I was showing up
with her. I didn’t think it mattered.” He listened again for a
minute.

“I understand, but I warned you she wasn’t
like that.” He looked at me with a grin. My eyes grew wider - I
could only imagine what was being said on the other end.

“No, I don’t think you have to worry about
either of them saying anything. No, Jason won’t – I talked to him
about it last night.

“Yeah, I’d say she wasn’t interested either.”
Evan smiled wider – heat flashed across my cheeks.

“Don’t worry about it; it’s fine. I’ll see
you tomorrow.” He laughed as he pressed
End
.

“You’d better tell me what that was all
about,” I threatened.

“He was pissed that I was there, thinking
that’s why you acted that way. And he wanted to know if I thought
any of you would say anything. The parties are handpicked for a
reason – no one talks about what goes on there. There are rumors,
but no one ever admits to anything. But the good news is that you
won’t have to worry about him hitting on you – I think he got the
hint.”

“Well, that’s good,” I admitted. “He really
is so full of himself. I can’t believe you’re friends with
him.”

“I wouldn’t say we’re friends. I met him
before I moved here. His mother and mine were on a fundraising
committee, and I met him at the dinner. When he found out I was
moving here, he invited me to one of his parties to
introduce
me to people before I started school.” I really
wanted to comment about his “introduction”, but the thought of it
made my stomach flip. I forced out the stray thoughts.

“Besides that, we have soccer in common, and
we’ve hung out a few times with other guys. But I would never call
him up and ask him over. He’s a lot to take by himself. I’d hate to
be the girl he’s focused on – you have no idea what he says…” Then
he stopped to look at me apologetically.

“Evan, are you serious?! He’s said things
about me to the soccer team?” My stomach turned in disgust.

“He doesn’t when I’m around because he knows
it pisses me off, and I have no problem telling him that. He’s an
ass, don’t worry about it. He’s not lying and saying that you’ve
gotten together or anything like that.” I knew he was trying to
make me feel better, but I was fuming at the thought of being the
topic of anything that came out of Jake’s mouth.

“We should head back,” Evan said, pulling me
back from my angry thoughts. I followed him to the bike where he
helped me with my helmet before we climbed on. The return trip
didn’t seem as long, thankfully. Can’t say the bike was my favorite
adrenaline rush.

Evan parked the bike in the garage before
leading me upstairs. Upon entering, he selected the music of a guy
with a smooth voice, strumming a guitar to an easy rhythm, singing
about being under the stars - it reminded me of being on the
beach.

“Are you hungry? I can run down and grab us a
couple of sandwiches,” he offered.

“Sure.” He left while I sat on the couch,
enchanted by the optimistic melodies. I barely heard Evan run back
up the stairs.

“Here you go,” he announced. I jumped.

“You don’t pay attention very well, do
you?”

“I didn’t hear you,” I defended. He let out a
quick laugh. He placed a plate on the table in front of me with a
bottle of root beer.

“Is your mom still here?”

“Yeah, she just gave me a hard time about
taking you out on the bike. I assured her you weren’t that
breakable.” I tightened my lips to hide a smile. I couldn’t imagine
his mother being so concerned about my well being. She barely knew
me.