Authors: Jennifer Rush
Tags: #Juvenile Fiction / Action & Adventure / General, #Juvenile Fiction / Science & Technology, #Juvenile Fiction / Love & Romance
Although he hadn’t told me his entire story yet, I got the sense that whatever he’d done for the Branch wasn’t good. After all, he’d been ordered to kill me that night in the forest.
Regardless, I felt drawn to him, and there was no way I could ignore that. No matter what his past was. It’d been only ten minutes since we’d kissed, and already I couldn’t wait another second longer to see him again. It was as if he were a block of iron and I were a
magnet drifting closer and closer, waiting for the inevitable moment when our magnetic fields would connect and pull us together.
Once Nick was out of sight, I slumped onto the couch, hugging one of Aggie’s homemade throw pillows to my chest, my fingers distractedly tracing the cross-stitch pattern on the front panel.
Without meaning to, I replayed the kiss in my mind, analyzing every move Nick had made, wondering if there was some hint as to his true feelings in the way he’d placed his hand on the small of my back, or in the way he’d drawn his tongue across my lips.
A thrill of butterflies took flight in my stomach, and an unbidden smile spread across my face. I covered my mouth with a hand, as if to stop my grin from spreading too wide, wide enough to escape.
Sometime later—I’d lost track of how many times I relived the kiss—I heard my name muttered from a room down the hall and remembered, vaguely, that Dr. Sedwick was here.
I tossed the pillow to the couch and stood up, straining to hear more. The conversation was only a ghost of a sound, whispered too quietly for me to make out anything important.
On bare feet, I made my way to the hallway and crept along the far side to avoid the squeaky, well-trodden boards in the center. When I reached the hall bathroom, I slipped inside and pressed myself in the corner near the open door.
It was much easier to hear from my new vantage point.
“We’ve lost track of him,” Dr. Sedwick said. “And that makes me nervous.”
“He must know this town isn’t his anymore,” Aggie said.
Dr. Sedwick sighed. “I don’t like this, Agatha. I don’t like it at all.”
“Neither do I, but what else would you have us do?”
There was a moment of silence before Dr. Sedwick went on, avoiding answering the question. It had sounded rhetorical anyway.
“What about our
other
situation?”
A chair squeaked.
“Elizabeth is doing well,” Aggie said. “I would say the situation is as good as we can hope for.”
At the mention of my name, I held my breath, wanting to hear as much as I could. Unfortunately, the subject changed just as quickly as it’d started, and I wasn’t mentioned again.
“Did you send for the boy you spoke of?” Aggie asked.
“I did.”
“And?”
“He’s here. Another set of eyes is always a good thing.”
Aggie murmured something I couldn’t make out. The chair squeaked again, louder this time, like someone had left it to stand.
Panic started to form in the base of my throat. Every muscle in my body said to move. I squeezed out of the doorway and hurried into the kitchen. I banged a few dishes around in the sink so it would appear as though I’d been here all along, preoccupied with cleaning.
A moment later, Aggie and Dr. Sedwick emerged, smiling, as if they hadn’t just had a cryptic conversation in the den.
“Morning, Elizabeth,” Dr. Sedwick said. He was wearing a plain T-shirt, sunglasses hanging from the collar, and a pair of khaki shorts.
“Morning. I didn’t know you were here.” I grabbed a dish towel and pretended to dry my hands. “I hope you’re not here to pester me.”
He laughed, and Aggie ambled past him to the coffeepot. “No,” he said. “I just needed to talk with Aggie about the fund-raiser coming up.”
I tossed the towel over my shoulder. “I see. Can I get you something to drink?”
“No. No. I should be going. But I’ll see you on Thursday?”
“I’ll be there. It’s the highlight of my week.”
He laughed again. “I’m sure. Have a good day, ladies.”
When the side door clicked closed behind him, I turned to Aggie. “What was he really doing here?”
She rinsed out her coffee cup from earlier that morning. “Just what he said. The fund-raiser.” She frowned. The cup dripped water on the floor. “I promise we didn’t talk about you, sweetheart.”
I rolled my eyes, because I knew that was the proper response. “I hope not. Because that would be a waste of a trip. And a boring conversation.”
She chuckled, and her beaded earrings swung back and forth. “Oh, you. What would I do without you?”
Another rhetorical question.
Aggie filled her cup, stirred in some creamer, and left me alone
in the kitchen. I didn’t feel like cleaning, but syrup was stuck on my hands from the towel I’d just used. I squirted some hand soap out, and the lemony scent filled my nose.
The floors of the building where I’d been held had been scrubbed with lemon-scented cleaner.
Lemons reminded me of that place, of the walls closing in, of secrets kept and secrets shared.
I’d never told Aggie about that particular trigger because she usually bought things that smelled like baked goods.
What were Aggie and Dr. Sedwick talking about, and what did it have to do with me?
Always so many secrets.
Immediately, I knew what my next mixed scent would be.
I would make a bottle and label it
SECRETS
and fill it with nothing but lemon.
I met up with Chloe at the coffee shop later in the day. Nick hadn’t returned to the carriage house, and Aggie had disappeared into her bedroom right after Dr. Sedwick left. I didn’t want to be alone. I had called Chloe, but now I worried that the moment she set her eyes on me, she’d know I was keeping something from her.
My cheeks still felt hot from the kiss, the heat of the moment setting my skin aglow. Chloe would take one look at me and see the truth written across my face.
“Hello, you,” Chloe said, and hooked her arm in mine as we entered the coffee shop. “How are you?”
The question felt like a trap. How was I? I was many things. Confused. Thrilled. Worried. Anxious.
All I said was, “Good.”
We got in line at the counter, and Chloe let go of my arm to dig around inside her purse. She pulled out her cell phone. “I have something to show you. And once I show you, I think you will be more than good.”
I frowned. “Okay.”
She tapped in a few things and handed the phone to me. It was a text conversation between her and Evan.
The first one on the screen, from Evan, said,
Is Lis seeing that d-bag Nick?
I looked at Chloe and raised a brow.
“I know,” Chloe sang as she stepped up to order her drink.
I kept reading. Chloe had replied,
Why?
Evan said,
Bcuz he’s a creep? Bcuz she deserves better? Bcuz I want to know?
Interesting
, Chloe said.
Just answer the question.
Which one?
UR so fking annoying sometimes.
That was the last one. Chloe hadn’t responded to Evan, and he hadn’t pressed for more.
When I glanced up from the cell, the barista behind the counter was staring at me expectantly. “Oh, sorry,” I said. “Iced latte, please.”
Chloe and I scooted down the counter to wait for our drinks at the other end.
“So?” Chloe said after she dropped her phone back in her bag.
“So. I’m not sure what to think of that.”
“Should I hire a skywriter for you? Would that make the message clearer?” She sighed and shook her head as she tore the wrapping from a straw. “Evan likes you. And he’s jealous of Nick. And we all like a jealous man.” She narrowed her eyes thoughtfully and twirled the straw between her fingers. “I don’t know what it is about them. Oh wait, yes I do. It’s the jealousy. Jealousy gives you power. Everyone wants something. And jealousy makes them want it more.”
“You are depraved,” I said.
“Yes,” she answered simply.
Our drinks were thrust onto the counter. I grabbed mine and made my way to a table in the far corner, near the windows, and Chloe followed.
“So, speaking of Nick,” she said, and all my senses went on alert. Did she know about the kiss?
“What about him?”
“Are you with him?”
“No. It’s not like that.”
Liar
, I thought.
“Well, have you… you know?” Chloe asked with a waggling of her eyebrows.
My mouth dropped open. “Chloe!”
“What? I would. I would do it so hard.”
“Stop. Please.”
She shrugged. “So clearly you haven’t. But it’s only a matter of time, I’d say. He can’t keep his eyes off you. Next step, it’ll be the hands.”
My face flushed, as I recalled the feel of those hands on my body, his fingers buried in my hair. And just like I’d predicted, Chloe saw it.
She gasped. “You
are
hiding something.”
“No.” I looked out the window, wincing at the zealous tone of her voice.
“Have you at least kissed him?”
I didn’t say anything.
“You did! Well. Kissing is the foundation of sex, so I guess you’re off to a good start.”
I lowered my voice. “Can we not talk about this here?” I scanned the shop, feeling as though everyone was staring at me, listening in on the conversation about my sex life. Or what little there was of it.
But no one was looking. The two people closest to us had their headphones on.
“Let me tell you something about guys like Nick, though.” She folded her hands around her cup, and all traces of her earlier lightheartedness disappeared. “It’s okay to lust after them. It’s even okay to sleep with them. But a girl, in a situation like this, has to protect her heart with everything she has.
“If you just want to have a good time with someone so gorgeous it hurts the eyes, then Nick is your guy, but you do not, under any circumstances, give him your heart. A boy like that will break it in a million pieces and leave it on the side of the road for the scavengers to pick at.”
I let her warning settle in. In some ways, I believed she was right. Someone as handsome as Nick couldn’t possibly settle down. Not that I was looking to settle down with him, or anyone. But I was also convinced that there was more to Nick than what Chloe saw on the outside.
“But,” Chloe went on, “if it’s love you’re looking for, then Evan is the one. Evan is someone you can love.”
I took a sip of my latte and tried to think of anything other than boys. Two weeks ago, all I’d wanted was to catch Evan’s attention. Now I had two guys and no idea what to do with either one.
I glanced out the window again, watching everyone who passed by the coffee shop. A woman crossed Washington Street heading toward Merv’s, her back to me. She was tall and thin, shoulders board straight, feet moving quickly. She carried herself the way my mother had, as if she always had somewhere to be, somewhere important.
The woman had the same dark wavy hair as my mother, too.
When I was first rescued, I used to see my mother everywhere, in every female face. Once, when I was shopping with one of my foster families, I chased after a woman who I thought was my mom. I followed her out of the store and to her car, where I banged on her window screaming for my mom.
When the tinted window rolled down and I saw the woman’s face—fearful, and concerned about the hysterical girl at her door—I realized she didn’t look anything like my mother. I could see my own hysteria reflected back at me.
That was the first time I truly felt aware of my sanity, or rather the crumbling of it.
Since then, I’d learned that if I saw someone who looked like my mother, it was better to ignore it. If she returned, I’d surely hear about it before spotting her in a grocery store or crossing the street.
“Lissy?” Chloe said.
“What?”
“I said, so which guy are you going to pick?”
I sighed. “Nick is going to leave town eventually anyway. So he’s not even a choice.”
“Good girl,” Chloe said, but there was no hint of humor in her voice.
If only she knew how badly I wished he’d stay.
I RAN FOR MILES AND MILES UNTIL I had no clue where I was. I brought up the GPS on the phone and navigated back toward town. When I was a few blocks from Arrow, the nightclub where I’d met Chloe, Trev called me.
“Where are you?” he asked.
I gave him my location.
“Good, you’re close. Can you stop by my hotel room? We need to discuss something.”
“Sure,” I said, and hung up without saying good-bye.
Fifteen minutes later, I was slumped in one of the chairs in the corner of Trev’s room. “I like what you’ve done with the place.”
There were weapons everywhere. Two Glocks on the nightstand, a knife in between them. There were full clips on the table in front
of me and more in an open bag on the floor. I saw the unmistakable curve of the mattress that indicated there was something shoved between it and the box spring. Probably more guns.
“Yeah, well, after you blow up the Branch, you realize there’s a permanent target on your back.”
“Technically Anna blew up the Branch. She was the one who hit
DETONATE
.”