Rising Star (13 page)

“
You are now,” Beth
giggled. “And you’re going to be rich and famous. Oh, maybe I
should get your autograph now, before you get too busy with your
makeup artists and your bodyguards.”

Selena had to laugh. She had been wishing
she hadn’t even accepted the part, or even the audition for the
part, but Beth’s good humor made her feel better.

“
It’s just a small part,”
she told her friend. “And I have to go and read for it. Then, all
these Hollywood folks will realize I suck at it and send me
packing.”

“
Don’t be such a negative
Nellie,” Beth said. “You’re going to be great and they’re gonna
love you, you’ll see.” Beth stopped her horse and swung her arms
wide. “May I present Miss Selena Summers,” she bellowed to the
empty forest. “Accepting her Oscar for best supporting
actress.”

Selena sat on Rusty, laughing at her
friend.

“
You’ll be walking that red
carpet, while everyone snaps your picture and yells your name,”
Beth continued.

“
Don should have took you
instead of me,” Selena told her, a serious tone in her voice now.
“You definitely have a flair for the dramatic.” Selena’s stomach
felt queasy at the thought of a crowd of people, taking her picture
and calling her name.

She dreamed that night of walking down the
red carpet; she was wearing the beautiful white evening gown she’d
worn for the photo shoot. As she made her way from the limousine
and down the red carpet, flashbulbs popping in her face, she turned
to wave to her fans. As she turned, she tripped over the evening
gown and fell face first on the red carpet, her bare feet and legs
in the air. She woke with a start, sitting up in bed, her stomach
feeling knotted. Oh, why didn’t I tell Don no, she thought as she
lay back down, holding her stomach.

Selena was back on a plane to Hollywood
within days and she wrote on her new laptop while she was in the
air. Matt had been right. The laptop was easier and now she could
write in L.A or Canada or wherever she ended up. Maybe someday,
she’d still get someone to actually read one of her manuscripts and
offer her a publishing deal.

Don had a car meet her at the airport and
she looked out the window as the driver made his slow way through
traffic. Unlike Jeffrie, this driver was older and stuffy and had
very little to say to her. She couldn’t say she was happy to be
back in this bustling city, but the thought of a new project to
keep her mind off Matt was exciting. Matt had been thrilled about
her tryout for the movie. They had emailed every day and even
talked on the phone when he had time. Which was indeed, a wonderful
change. She felt like his girlfriend now and the emotional security
had halted her flip-flopping feelings. She knew now, there was
something between them and she wanted to be with him, wherever his
work took him. She only wished she were flying off to Canada right
now to be with him, instead of being back in Hollywood.

She went the following day to the movie
studio to read her lines for Don Broward. She was surprised to see
a dark haired lady sitting on his right and an older, white-haired
man on his left. He introduced them as Marie and Travis. “They are
co-producing this movie with me,” he explained. There was also
Don’s assistant and several other people milling about. Selena felt
knots of tension tighten her stomach as Don handed her the script.
“Yours will be the lines for Amanda,” he explained. “The angry,
jilted lover. Bryan will read the leading man’s lines.” Selena felt
nervous, but not the nervous anticipation of someone desperately
hoping to snag a part in a movie. She really didn’t care either
way, she was only nervous having to read her lines in front of all
these people.

A young man stepped forward and shook
Selena’s hand. “I’m just filling in,” he explained. “Paul James is
supposed to be the lead.”

“
Oh, okay.” Selena’s heart
did a little flip-flop. She couldn’t imagine playing in a movie
with her old crush, Paul James. The same blond, blue-eyed, handsome
movie star who seemed to be a friend to Matt too.

She followed Bryan up onto the stage and
began clumsily reading the lines. She was supposed to be the jilted
lover, angry with Bryan and screaming at him, then quickly do an
about face and fawn all over him, gushing words of love.

She stumbled across her lines at first, then
smoothed out as she began to relax. As she pictured herself more
and more as the petulant Amanda, she could feel herself getting
into the part. She didn’t notice when Paul James and a beautiful
blond girl walked in and took a seat behind Don. She was too busy
shouting angry words at Bryan, then hugging him and whispering
words of love.

“
Okay. lets do it again,”
Don called out. “Paul,” he nodded his head and Paul James wandered
onto the stage. He didn’t have to read for the part himself, he’d
been handpicked for the part before the screenplay was even
finished. He was only concerned with having the correct leading
ladies. Selena felt even more nervous as she read her lines again,
this time opposite Paul James. She quickly threw herself back into
the character and pretended it was still Bryan on the stage with
her as she gushed words of love to him. She was nervous in the
presence of an actor such as Paul. Especially when she’d had such a
crush on him when she was younger. But, it helped to pretend it was
still Bryan she was facing on the stage.

Paul read his own lines and they quickly
fell into their parts. As Selena began to relax, she found the
lines coming easier. They began to share an easiness around each
other—a chemistry even—and it didn’t go unnoticed by Don. Of
course, she’d had a major crush on him a few years earlier, and
Paul’s roguish smile was enough to melt any girl’s heart.

“
Let’s try it again,” Don
called. “But this time Selena, if you would read the lines of
Brittany.”

She heard a grunt from the girl sitting
behind him. Selena glanced at her and saw an angry look on her
face.

Don quickly highlighted the lines he wanted
her to read and handed her the script. Selena went back to the
stage and began again. Now, she had to start over, wrapping her
head around a different character. She did it the same as when she
wrote her stories. She pictured herself as the main character of
the story and quickly became that person on the stage. Their lines
now were steamy, lines between two lovers, and the scene ended with
a kiss. On their first run through, Selena and Paul were just
warming up, but Selena could detect the chemistry between them.
Either Paul was attracted to her, or he was a very good actor.

“
Let’s do it again,” Don
called out as Paul ended the scene with a quick kiss on Selena’s
lips.

They read through it again, getting more
into their parts. There was more emotion in their voices as the
room seemed to electrify around them. Paul ended the scene by
grabbing Selena and bending her backwards as he kissed her hard on
the mouth.

“
Great,” Don called out.
“Let’s take a break. There’s a catering table set up in the back,
Selena. Help yourself to lunch.”

Paul followed Selena to the rear of the
room, where he made himself a sandwich. “You did really well,” he
said as he smiled his sexy, roguish smile. “I’m not sure what Don’s
up to now, but I think I’ll go tell him I want you for the
lead.”

“
Are you serious?” Selena’s
voice rose as she answered. She wasn’t sure she’d heard him
correctly. She couldn’t play a lead part with Paul James. She was a
nobody. She hadn’t taken acting classes; she hadn’t spent her
entire life around Hollywood, growing up on movie sets. She
couldn’t understand why they wanted her at all. And what about the
blond girl, still sitting alone by the stage? Selena saw Don
huddled in the corner with Marie and Travis, their heads close
together as they whispered to each other.

Finally, Don broke away from the other two
and walked over to where Selena was still standing by the table.
“Selena,” he said with a warm smile. “We’d like for you to play the
lead in this movie. If you think you would like to?”

Selena felt her stomach drop, like it did
when she rode a roller coaster. She could only nod her head as she
stared.

“
You’re going to need to
get yourself an agent. I can recommend a couple different ones.” He
wrote some names and numbers on a notepad, then tore the paper off
and handed it to Selena. “Let my office know who you choose and
we’ll negotiate your contract with them.

Selena stared at him, dumbfounded. She could
still only nod as she stared at Don, an uneaten sandwich forgotten
in her hand. She hadn’t wanted to be in this movie in the first
place. Now, she was supposed to play the lead? With Paul James for
a co-star?

She wandered around her hotel room in a daze
the rest of the evening, unable to concentrate on anything as she
tried to picture watching herself on-screen, as the star of a
movie. She knew so many people worked and struggled for just such
an opportunity while it was being thrown in her lap, but she just
didn’t see herself as an actress—or a model either, for that
matter.

Matt was exhilarated when Selena told him
about the movie. “See, I knew you were a leading lady,” he said
excitedly. “Or, at least, you’re my leading lady,” he said
sweetly.

“
Yeah, but I just don’t
think this is what I want to do with my life. It was a little
easier today without the cameras—I guess I’m a little camera shy,”
she said.

“
That’s alright, you’ll get
used to it.”

“
I’d rather just come and
hang out with you,” Selena said sadly.

“
I’m sure it’ll work out.
I’ll be back in L.A. before you know it. When does your movie begin
filming?”

“
In a month. Don is just
finishing out the cast.”

“
Maybe I’ll be back by
then,” he repeated hopefully.

Selena couldn’t imagine waiting another
month to see Matt. It just wasn’t fair. Why couldn’t her passport
arrive already? She would be on a plane today if she only had
it.

She returned home, where she sat dejectedly
every day, watching the mail for her new passport. As day after day
sped by, and still no passport, she finally went back to her other
two loves, writing and barrel racing with Rusty. She had left off
with the latest story in the saga of Trish; she had gotten stuck on
a scene and she put it aside until it came to her. She began a new
novel, a story of two young lovers, who meet and fall in love, but
are forbidden to be together by their parents. She worked on it
every spare minute, getting more involved in the character’s lives
every day. She knew it mirrored some of her own life; the struggles
she was going through to be with Matt, but perhaps that would make
it better, more realistic.

She brought home a red, second place ribbon
the following Sunday at the rodeo. She’d had the fastest time, but
Rusty had turned too sharp and hit her knee on the barrel, knocking
it down. She knew it wasn’t Rusty’s fault, she couldn’t concentrate
between missing Matt every second and thinking about starring in a
movie. Now, her left knee had a huge purple and blue bruise across
it. She was becoming frustrated with everything lately. Except her
writing. It was her one escape from the world. Her one solitary
place where she lived only by her own rules, where she could escape
into the lives she created.

Her passport finally arrived in the mail,
but with only two days left before she was due to fly back to L.A.,
there was no time for a visit to Matt. She cried on the phone as
she talked to him that night. “I was so looking forward to seeing
you
and
Toronto,” she sniffed.

“
Aw, come on,” Matt said,
“you just wanted to come up here and eat up all of our ketchup
potato chips.”

“
Yeah, that’s it,” Selena
laughed through her tears.

“
I’ll be back in L.A.
soon,” Matt said softly. “I really miss you too. Long distance
relationships really suck, huh?”

“
Yeah, they really
do.”

Chapter 19

Selena flew back to L.A. two days later. She
worked on the story of the two young lovers throughout the flight.
She thought it might be about half way finished and she typed
furiously as the plane flew west. She had taken Matt’s advice and
sent another of her manuscripts out to several literary agencies.
She waited every day for answers to her queries. She just knew she
was going to have a positive answer this time. She’d never had the
guts to send them in before and it made her really nervous. But at
the same time, the thought of being discovered as an author was
very exciting, unlike being discovered as an actress. Actresses
come and go from Hollywood all the time, she thought as she stopped
typing and stared out the small window of the plane, but a good
novel, that lasts forever.

When the rejection letters came a few days
later, they didn’t hurt as much as before, but they did still hurt.
She wished they weren’t just a standard, polite rejection letter.
She wished they would tell her what it was about her work they
didn’t like. No one, not even her parents, had ever read any of her
stories. She could use an outside opinion, to let her know what was
good or bad with each one. She was beginning a new career with this
movie, when what she really wished for was to be a writer. Not just
a writer…a published author. Selling one book and knowing that
people were reading what she had created meant more to her than
starring in a hundred movies.