Risky Business (15 page)

Molly knew her mom was disturbed by the events of the past month just about every waking moment. Though she’d said everything and tried anything she could think of, Molly could do nothing to convince her parents she was truly sorry. She looked in the glove compartment, wishing with all her might to find a fun magazine or some other distraction in there.

Finally she couldn’t take it anymore. She turned the radio on to their favorite Christian station. The last few bars of a song were fading as the host welcomed a guest, Penny Summerfield, author of
Handbook of Grace
.

“Hi, Penny. Welcome to the show. We’re so glad to have you here with us today. We’d like to offer you a
Penny
for your thoughts.” The radio host laughed hysterically at his own joke.

Penny laughed like she found it funny that he thought his joke was original. Molly imagined her saying, “Ha, ha, like I haven’t heard that three times since breakfast.” But, of course, she didn’t.

“Tell us about your latest book, Penny.”

“Sure, Phil,
Handbook of Grace
is just that. It’s a handbook, a guide, if you will, to help you navigate the path of God’s grace and see where it’s at work in your life every step of the way. You see, sometimes people—Christians—don’t realize that hardships and trials in life can be an act of God meant to steer them more solidly onto the path of His will for them. The roadblocks and speed bumps that He puts in the way are just measures of His grace as He helps guide the way.”

Molly didn’t think all that she’d been going through was an act of God. He didn’t make her steal.
But could He have had something to do with me getting caught? No, that’s pretty much all Sara and Jess’s fault
.

“Phil,” Penny continued, “sometimes we expect things to go our way all the time, and we get angry when they don’t. We can get angry with God, with other people, even with ourselves. But, oftentimes, the hardship is God’s answer to a mistake or a wrong turn that we’ve made. If we’re walking outside of His will for us and He uses circumstances to kind of bump us back in line with His plan, why do we not rejoice in that and thank Him for His attentive concern for us? Rather, we get bitter, angry, and resentful of our own mistakes and others who were involved along the way.”

“Those are some great points—” Phil started to say.

But she wasn’t through. “God’s grace is there. It’s right before us. Yet we dance around it, step on it now and then, rub it into the ground, ignore it, and turn away from it sometimes. But when we do that, we blame everyone but ourselves. Rather than grabbing the grace of God and applying it to our lives, we shun it and then resent that it wasn’t there when we’re the ones who pushed it away.”

“I hear what you’re saying, Penny. But how, exactly, does one, as you said, ‘grab the grace of God’ and apply it to our lives?”

“Aha! That’s the key question right there.” She sounded excited about her subject.

“Well, I can’t wait to hear the answer,” Phil said emphatically. “Let’s take a commercial break, and when we come back, I think we’re in for a treat, folks.”

Hmm. She’s not so bad
. Molly was surprised at her interest, but Penny’s infectious excitement and the fact that the subject spoke right to Molly’s own heart was too much for her to ignore. Mom leaned forward and turned up the radio just a bit and they sat in silence, listening to the commercials.

Molly considered what she’d just heard in light of the events of the past few weeks. Her anger was misplaced. She had no right to be angry with her friends or her boss—she only had herself to blame. She also had no right to resent her punishment or her parents’ disappointment.
But I can’t help it
.

“We’re back with Penny Summerfield, author of
Handbook of Grace
. She’s about to tell us how a person can grab hold of God’s grace and apply it to his life. I can’t wait to hear the answer to this. Penny?”

“Thank you, Phil. Well, I’m sorry to say, there’s no formula. As you know, as a Christian yourself, God’s grace is free and available to all people. But how do we ‘apply’ it as I mentioned? Well, grace is freeing, it’s the gift of God that gives us the freedom to walk in righteousness. Because of God’s grace, we don’t have to pay the price for our own sins. Jesus already did that for us. So, we are invited to claim that payment and walk in the freedom not to sin.”

“Wait, the freedom
not
to sin? That seems like a strange way to put it.”

“Oh Phil, everyone is going to do wrong—we’re fallen beings. But it’s only the follower of Christ, through the power of the Holy Spirit, covered in the grace of God, who truly has the freedom and the power to say
no
to unrighteous behavior. We can say no whether it’s blatant sin—unholy attitudes like jealousy, pride, selfishness, anger, resentment—or even just being passive and unresponsive to God’s call. We have the freedom, through God’s grace, to say
yes
to righteousness,
yes
to God’s call,
yes
to sound choices and right attitudes of the heart.”

Oh boy, I’ve really been blowing it
. Molly sighed.

“Rather than using God’s grace as a way out when we sin, let’s apply God’s grace in such a way that it helps us to say yes to His perfect plan.”

“I like what you’ve had to say, Penny. I hope our listeners are thinking of ways to say yes to God’s grace right now.”

They pulled into the parking lot of the dentist’s office. Mom turned off the car and grabbed her purse from the console between the seats. She looked at Molly and opened her mouth like she had something to say. But, instead, she closed it again and climbed out of the car, shaking her head. Molly took an extra moment to collect her thoughts before she got out.

I had it all wrong
. Molly had been missing out on the fullness of a true and right relationship with God. In her mind, up until that point, it had been about staying out of trouble and being forgiven when she did something wrong, rather than running toward the righteousness she’d been called to. She’d been living a battle between the selfish part of her that demanded to be kept happy and the holy part of her that longed to be like Jesus. Which side would win?

Molly and God had some things to work out. She woke up a bit anxious to get to church, hoping she’d find her way back
home
. When sheopened her eyes, though, she was immediately taken aback by the brightness that filled the room. It wasn’t the yellow of daybreak sunshine. Instead it was a blinding whiteness. Molly jumped out of bed and ran to the window.

Blankets of snow covered everything. Cars were stuck in the street behind Molly’s house, and the back door wouldn’t be usable again until spring. And the snow still came down in big flakes that wafted down slowly but heavily unto the piles below.

Oh no
. There would be no church, and even if services weren’t canceled, they’d never make it out of the driveway to get there. What a bummer. Molly had really hoped church would be the answer to her innermost needs today. The new youth services had been so wonderful in the weeks since they’d started—she needed to be there.

The snow continued to fall as Molly looked out the window at the beauty that lay before her.
It’s just like sin
. Jesus covered sin just like snow covers everything in sight. Suddenly it hit her.
God’s not limited to a church building. I don’t have to go there to find Him—He’s within

me. Maybe this snowstorm is part of His plan
. The storm meant Molly had to find her own way back to God—probably just how He wanted it.

The time has come
.

“Mom and Dad, I need your help.”

They were enjoying the leisure of the surprise snowy morning at home by lingering over a cup of coffee at their cozy kitchen table. Mom had just taken a sip from her pink and white W
ORLD’S
G
REATEST
M
OM
mug. She looked up with wide eyes, startled by Molly’s emphatic statement. She slowly lowered her cup and swallowed with a loud gulp.

Dad nodded and gestured to an empty chair. “Well, take a seat. What can we help you with?”

“You guys, I’ve been thinking.” Molly paused for a moment, sinking onto the kitchen chair, chewing her bottom lip while she chose her words carefully. “Mom, do you remember that radio show we listened to yesterday in the car?”

She waited for her mom to think back.

“Oh, do you mean that author who spoke about God’s grace giving us the freedom to live a righteous life?”

“Yeah, that’s the one. Well, I’ve been thinking a lot about some of the things she said and some other things….” Molly took a deep breath. “I think I’ve had it all wrong.”

Molly’s parents both leaned forward. “We’re listening,” Dad said.

“The thing is, I’ve been angry. I’ve been mad that I got caught and mad at my friends for doing something dumb enough to get us caught. I’ve been angry with everyone but myself, when I really have no one to blame but me. Funny how that works, isn’t it?”

Molly’s mom and dad both nodded but didn’t say a word.

“Well, I guess I’d forgotten that being a Christian doesn’t just mean looking good to other people. It isn’t just about doing as much as you can get away with without getting caught. It isn’t about just skating by. It’s letting God’s grace change your life so that you don’t even want to do those dumb things that were once a part of you. Do you know what I’m trying to say?”

Dad sat back in his chair and laced his fingers behind his head. “If I hear you correctly, you’re saying that you’ve been living like a Christian on the outside but hadn’t really changed on the inside. So when push came to shove, you didn’t have what it took to walk in God’s grace and say no to sin. Is that what you’re getting at?”

Molly slowly nodded. “Yes, that’s exactly what I’ve been trying to work out in my mind but couldn’t quite put it into the right words. Was it obvious to you that I’ve been living like that?”

Mom smiled. “Honey, you have to understand, we know you very well. We know you love to make people happy. You’ve always wanted to make your dad and me happy, so you’ve been a good girl. You’ve been involved in church. You’ve done what you’re supposed to do. You want to make people at church happy, so you adopted their lifestyles and ways of doing things—you learned how to talk the talk.”

Molly nodded along.

Mom took a sip of her coffee and then continued. “You wanted to make your boss happy, so you worked really hard and won her favor and even a promotion. And you wanted to make your friends happy. This time that didn’t work out so well for you. But where in all of that do we see that you want to make Jesus happy?”

Molly thought hard about Mom’s words. “Mom, Dad, I can’t believe I have to say this, but I can honestly say I’ve never considered pleasing Jesus. Like you just spelled out, everything I’ve done has been motivated by my desire to satisfy someone else. Most of the times that has been in line with what God would want from me. But you’re so right. When push came to shove, I wasn’t thinking about Him at all, and it shows by what I did.”

Molly shook her head and looked down at the table.
What do I do now?
Suddenly she looked up at them, helpless. “How do I change?”

“Sweetheart.” Molly’s mom laid her hand over her daughter’s hand. “You’ve made the first step. You’ve acknowledged you can’t do it on your own anymore and you want to live for Jesus, not for everyone else. Now we need to pray together and tell Him. Then your dad and I will help you figure out how to apply it to your life.”

“It’s like that lady on the radio said, Mom. Through the grace of God, we have the power and the freedom not to do wrong things to please everyone else. And He gives us the power to say yes to the good things. Right?”

“Exactly. You know, Molly …” Her mom hesitated. “I don’t think your dad and I have really been great teachers of the love and grace of God.”

“Yeah, we’ve been kind of caught up in the tradition, the religion of it all,” Dad admitted. He stood up and walked to the window. “I think your new youth service is just what you needed. What we all needed, maybe.”

Molly folded her arms across her chest and grinned.

“I think we’re going to start seeing some changes around here.”