Rockstar Daddy (Decoy Series) (26 page)

a black maxi dress and shove my hair up in a messy ponytail. Basic make-up and I'm good to go, I groan in frustration when I realize my car is still outside Jessica's so I quick walk to her house and hurry to my parents. I arrive at 7:15 and walk straight into their house. All thoughts of last night are long forgotten right now. When I enter the house the first words I hear are,

      "Mama juice pleeese."

   "Okie Finley."

      "And biscuits."

I hear my dad laughing.

      "I thought you wanted ceriel Fin?"

   "Kay Grandad, Mama ceriel too pleeese."

Oh my god I've missed that so much. I quickly sneak past the stairs so Finley can't see me and sit at my parents kitchen table. I hear them come downstairs and I'm practically bouncing in my chair. Finley is the first one to walk into the kitchen and his eyes quickly scan the kitchen and then jump back to me realizing I'm sat here with a huge grin plastered on my face. I start to cry at the look on his face, I have missed my son so much!

      "Mummy!"

He screams at the top of his voice and runs towards me, I open my arms and wrap them tightly around him. I'm sobbing when his tucked in my arms. I've not seen him for four nights, it feels like I haven't been breathing without him because now I feel so relieved to have him in my arms.

      "Oh god Finley I missed you so much."

   "I miss you mummy."

I pull him back so I can look at his perfect little face. He has tears in his eyes and my heart brakes.

      "Oh honey whats the matter?"

   "I miss you mummy."

His voice breaks and he buries his face back into my neck and holds on tight to me. My heart just broke a little more.

      "Oh baby! I missed you so much. Your sleeping in my bed tonight because I want to cuddle you all night."

He pulls away and wipes at his eyes. His face lights up in a big smile.

      "I like your bed."

   "I no you do gorgeous."

He sits on my knee and eats his breakfast, not wanting to be away from me. I didn't think he would cry when he saw me, my mum told me he was fine all the time. He probably was but then seeing me now made him realize how much he missed me. I help him get dressed after he has picked his clothes and when we go back downstairs his back to his usual self. He watches cartoons for fifteen minutes before we leave for his school and then my work.

      "Kendal I'm so jealous of you tan. Were you only there two nights?"

   "I know, we've all caught the sun. It was so hot there but a lot of fun."

On that note my mum wants to know everything so I give her an edited version knowing my dad is listening in even though he looks like his not bothered in the conversation.

*~*~*

   Today at work was such a drag and Tanya kept staring at me like I was going to break down at any minute. But on the plus side my last booking canceled so I got one of the nail girls to do my nails for me so mine were all done already and I can show the girls what there going to look like. They fit in with the sparkle theme from our dresses and shoes. There a navy glitter polish and the nail next to the little finger is white and silver glitter that twinkles in the light. Very pretty. I shout 'see you later' to Tanya and leave to go and fetch Finley from school. Were going to spend a few hours on our own before the girls come over. I have been thinking about what Sophie had said on the phone all day. Should I meet Jax, I do think it's a good idea but I can't imagine seeing him again. Do I tell him about Finley tonight , if I met him or do I wait until after the wedding? I can't take Finley to the wedding because of this, it will take everything away from Sophie and Rhys' big day. So my mum has already agreed to spend the night at my house with Finley seeing as his spent a while from his house so far.

Chapter 17

   Me and Finley spend the rest of the afternoon playing and catching with on our cuddles.

      "Finley is it OK if you stay at home with mama instead of the wedding tomorrow?"

   "Yes, I want to stay home mummy. Logan said weddings are boring and people kiss."

He makes a disgusted look on his face. Appalled with the thought of people kissing. Well that was easy.

      "The girls are coming tonight Fin, I have to do there nails."

He looses interest and nods as he look back to the TV. I decide to text Sophie.

ME:  Soph, what did Jax have in mind?

SOPHIE:  Dinner? Or would u rather just meet and talk?

This is tricky, could I eat in front of him? I would be nervous as hell, what if I was sick? Meet up and talk? That means it's just us two, talking. That could be awkward, I know dinner could be awkward to but at least I could eat to fill silences and we wouldn't be alone.

ME:  Dinner, if thats OK? What time?

It's about fifteen minutes before I get a text back.

SOPHIE:  He will pick you up at 9.30, wear a nice dress and

heels, I have a feeling his booked to impress u honey. I need ur address x

I text her back to tell her Tanya is picking her up at 6:00 because I want them to come sooner now I'm meeting Jax. His taking me somewhere to impress me? He doesn't need to impress me, I loved him before he had anything. I hope he hasn't changed and become a male diva. I think about how I'm going to tell Sophie, I do need to tell her. She's going to see Finley tonight, when she looks at him she's going to see. 

   An hour later I get Finley ready for bed, his bedtime is 7:00 because it's a school night. At 6:00 there's a knock on the door and I know it's going to be Jessica. When I open she door I'm swallowed by tiny arms and held tight.

     "Oh Kendal how are you?"

   "Fine."

      "I'm been worried all day."

   "Jess I'm fine."

She holds me back and narrows her eyes at me.

      "You're fine?"

   "Yea, I've had time to get used to it and I'm meeting Jax at 9:30."

Before she can say anything Finley runs up to Jessica and we move into the living room. Not long after Maisy shows and then I see Tanya's car pull up. When I see Sophie I get all nervous. I have already told the girls we need to tell Sophie so we all decided if she says anything about Finley looking like Jax then I will come clean. If not I will tell her in the morning. I jumped in the shower once Jessica turned up and then blow dried it so I'm nearly ready for Jax. Tanya just walks straight in like what she normally does and I see Sophie behind her. She looks a little awkward so I walk straight up to her and grab her in a hug. I hear her sniff a few times, I know she has shed a few tears. I give her a smile and kiss her on her forehead.  She giggles and I know everything is fine but I don't know for how long. I hear Finley laugh in the living room and Sophie looks in the direction, I know she's dying to meet him. I've denied her this long so I take her by the hand and lead her into the living room. I notice when we step into the living room Sophies body goes stiff a little. Finley is laughing at Jessica, his wearing his gray pajamas, there gray with red and black guitars all over. I get Finley's attention and he walks over a little shyly because he doesn't know Sophie.

      "Finley this is my friend Sophie I told you about."

He looks to think for a minute and then he smiles his mega wat smile at Sophie.

      "Hi Sophie."

   "Hi Finley."

Her voice sounds high pitched and croaky. Finley runs back to Maisy and Jessica so I look back over my shoulder at Sophie. Her eyes are wide and look like they have tears in them and her mouth is hanging open a little. Yep, she knows. How could she not when he gave her the typical charming Jax smile.

      "Soph?"

She tears her eyes away from Finley and looks at me.

      "Kendal?"

I look over to Maisy and Jessica who have both stood up. Maisy takes hold of Finley's hand.

      "Come on biddy, lets go and play in your room."

   "Okay, I show you my guitar!"

She gives me a wink as she passes and I lead Sophie onto the sofa in the middle of me and Jessica. Tanya sits on the chair closest to me and pats my hand in support.

      "W-when did you leave Jax?"

I swallow hard, she's piecing it together.

      "Four years ago."

She nods.

      "And how old is Finley?"

I clear my throat.

      "His four next month."

She nods her head and then slowly looks at me dead in the eye.

      "How could you that Kendal? This is what his wanted all these years. His been lost without you."

I hang my head in shame, I feel like shit. This is making me feel like shit and it's only going to be worse when I finally tell Jax. I tell Sophie every feeling in detail, my thoughts on why I did this and every memory I remember from when I saw those two lines on that test and then to now, where I know I have made a mistake and I do regret it but I still stand by my decision. I don't think Jax would have reached his dream if I would have told him I was pregnant four years ago. When I have finished talking everyone's quiet apart from Finley shouting and laughing from his bedroom upstairs. I have been looking down at the floor while I have been talking and I know I a tear stained face but I look up anyway. Jessica is looking sadly at me with tears in her eyes and Tanya is looking at Sophie but I see Tanya has shed a few tears. I finally look at Sophie, scared at what I will see but what I see surprises me. She's looking at me with such pity in her eyes, her face is wet with her tears and her hand is clutching her heart.

      "Oh my god Kendal, I'm so sorry honey! Come here."

She wraps her arms around me and when she does I cry in her arms and then I hear Sophie crying too. When we have stopped and are tear free we smile at each other and Sophie smooths my hair.

      "Are you going to tell him tonight?"

   "I don't know, I was thinking maybe meeting him after your wedding and telling him. I don't want there to be an atmosphere for Saturday."

      "True, as much as I don't like it I won't say anything until you do. Only if you promise to tell him by Tuesday the latest. Or I will tell him."

   "I promise."

      "I'm happy you have told me though. He looks exactly like him, it's unreal."

We talk about Finley and then I realize it's time for Finley to go to bed. So I shout him down and Sophie looks a little nervous. Finley strolls in like nothing has happened and sits on my knee.

      "It's time to say goodnight to everyone buddy."

   "Ohhhhh"

He pouts his sad face and I see Sophie copy his facial expression.

      "Say night to the girls."

We both stand and he gives Jessica, Maisy and Tanya a hug and a kiss and then he gets to Sophie. There both looking a little awkward, not knowing what to do.

      "Give Sophie a hug and a kiss Finley."