Rockstar's Angel (2 page)

Leo's frown deepens and he nods. "Fine."

"OK." I leave feeling like shit. Leo didn't look pleased when I left, I hope he understood what I was trying to say. I couldn't stick around and ask. I needed to leave before anyone saw me.

***

Another couple of months pass by and I'm pleased to say that not much has changed in mine and Leo's friendship. He still flirts openly with me and there's no awkwardness. I thought he'd hate me after the way I left his place, I'm so glad he doesn't. The only thing that has changed are the sneaky little gropes and touches Leo manages to get in when no one  is looking, and the few nights we have been able to spend together. It makes me feel better that Leo doesn't treat me like one of his groupies, he actually comes back to me. I know I shouldn't be going back to him, I know I'm securing my own heartbreak, but how can I turn him down?

I don't think that's a possibility for me. I'm pleased to report that each night spent with Leo is as crazily passionate as the first time. The hurtful part being that Leo still acts like the playboy he is. We may have spent some explosive nights together, but he still goes straight back to the skanky groupies when he gets off stage or even when we're out with our friends. I shouldn't let it get to me, but I can't help it. My feelings are growing for him the more nights we spend together. I get so angry at him when I watch him with other girls. How can he treat me like this and why am I fucking letting him? He's treating me like one of his fucking skanks, not disrespecting me in leaving me and not turning back, but it hurts just as badly when I have to watch him giving another girl the attention I want. When he walks over to me and whispers into my ear, I forget my anger and spend yet another night with him. I truly am in too deeply where Leo is concerned.

One night I go to one of Decoy's local gigs with Kendal. I love watching them play, but I hate seeing the pathetic groupies. They literally beg the guys to fuck them. Jax gets the worst of it, and I don't know how Kendal copes with it. I hate having to watch girls swarm around Leo, but he's not mine, giving me no right to be jealous. But I am. I watch Leo as sweat drips off him, pounding on the drums. His shirt clings to him, and I feel every hit of the drum as he strikes his hand down hard. I'm staring at him as he looks straight up at me and winks. I can make out his tongue as he runs it along his bottom lip; it lights a fire inside of me. I know exactly what wonderful things that tongue of his can do. It was quick, but I saw it and Leo knows it. The screaming from the groupies brings me back into focus and I see Leo wink at a girl at the front of the stage, which pisses me off. Well if Leo can do it, why can't I?

Leo

That was one awesome gig and the crowd was going wild. We're getting closer to making it, I can feel it.

I walk out from backstage, having changed out of my sweaty clothes; the first thing I see is a wannabe Goth dancing with Tanya. I want to be the one she dances with, I want to be touching that sweet little body of hers, not that fucker. Instead of stopping whatever is going to happen, I decide to go to the bar and try and ignore the way Tanya's body is calling me. She's not my girl so why should I give a fuck what she does?

An hour later, when everyone else is too busy to notice, I walk over to them in the corner. The Goth has his hands all over Tanya, kissing her soft mouth. I immediately see red. When I reach them I don't even think about what I'm doing. I yank him away from her, ignoring Tanya's gasp of surprise. The Goth glares at me until he
realizes who I am. "Hey, cool set man." I ignore him and look to Tanya, fucking hell she's gorgeous. In this light her hair looks white; my angel. Tanya's eyes are wide as she looks from the Goth then back to me. "Shit, this chick is your pussy tonight? I didn't know, sorry man."

Before I can punch the guy in the face for referring to Tanya like that he fucks off, Tanya watches him go, then turns to look at me. Shit, she looks angry. "Why are you always chasing men away from me Leo? You're a fucking dick!"

I glide my fingers down her arm, leaning in close. I don't answer her question because I don't know why I keep chasing men away. All I know is I don't like seeing it, so I stop it. "I didn't want his hands on you angel. I want you tonight." I hear her gasp and I can't help but smile. I don't know what's happening, but I do know that I need to have her in my bed tonight. "You know I make you feel good baby." I softly kiss up her neck. "Let me make you feel good."

Tanya

Leo's words set my body alight with desire, I crave him. I need to have him now. I nod my head, unable to say anything, letting Leo guide me towards the backstage area, forgetting that I was a angry with him just seconds ago. As soon as we're inside the private dressing room he locks the door, stalking towards me. His look makes me weak, I have to lean back against the wall for support. Leo crashes his body against mine, growling in my ear. "Looking fucking sexy."

I whimper and Leo takes that as his cue, smashing his lips against mine, taking complete control of my body. He takes what he wants, giving me exactly what I need. The loud music from the bar covers my screaming as I climax, but Leo isn't finished with me yet. After I've recovered he bends me over a table that doesn't look sturdy enough to hold a flower pot, never mind my weight, but as Leo slams into me from behind, the table is long forgotten. I feel the burning need of my climax building, but Leo quickly moves us over to a chair where I straddle him; I ride him until we climax together. It was amazing and would have ended on a good note, unfortunately less than an hour after having mind blowing orgasms with Leo, I watch as two groupies flirt with him again. He laughs, the three of them leaving together with their arms linked. Leo has a fucking big grin on his mother fucking face. I can't do this anymore. I'm not sleeping with that dick ever again!

***

Two weeks later I wake up in Leo's bed feeling like this is never going to end. I look over to Leo, sleeping naked, and mentally kick myself. How can I be so weak for this man?

I hear footsteps outside the bedroom door and hold my breath. Shit, the guys are here. I shake Leo awake, whispering. "I need to get out of here-fast."  I jump up, quickly getting dressed. A knock on the front door stops me and I look to Leo. When Kendal's voice comes from outside Leo's bedroom door we both slowly move closer so we can listen in. As we eavesdrop on my best friend’s conversation my heart breaks for her. I hear every word she says, and I'm shocked. I thought Kendal loved Jax, so why is she here breaking up with him?

When Kendal leaves we hear Jax slam his bedroom door. Leo turns to me. "I can't believe she's left him."

"I know, but I guess she has her reasons." I'm so shocked right now. Kendal and Jax are the real deal.

Leo frowns at me, nodding "I guess we don't have to worry over telling Kendal about us anymore." I'm shocked. So because Jax and Kendal are not together, whatever we had going on is suddenly finished? I’m hurt by his words, which stab at my now breaking heart. I know what we're doing should either end or we need to stop sneaking around and lying to our friends, but I can't believe he just said that to me. What was he doing all of this time? Keeping me sweet so I wouldn't rat him out to everyone? I feel like a dirty used groupie. Well I'll keep his precious little secret, but I'm not putting myself in this position with him ever again!

I turn around, snatching my bag from his bed. "Well, if that's how you feel, I'm going and I'm never coming back."

I push past him as he tries to stop me. "Tan, I didn't mean-"

"I don't fucking care! I knew this was just sex to you! I can't believe I let you use me like this! I just had to keep coming back for more! Well you know what Leo, don't worry! I'm going and I'm never coming back!"

His eyes widen, he stands still, staring at me while I shout in his face. I yank open his door, ignoring Max, Rhys and Leo standing outside with shocked looks on their faces, slamming the front door behind me.

Fucking dick!

Tanya

Present Day

Looking at my best friend, as the wedding guests congratulate her and her new husband Jax, you'd never guess she's fourteen weeks pregnant. She's still slim, her gorgeous wedding dress showcasing her figure. I suppose she wants to make the most of her fantastic figure before the baby changes it. I know she's dying to come over to me because, as she talks to Jax's parents, her eyes keep wandering over to me. I know why, but that doesn't mean it's not starting to piss me off.

"She's just worried about you." I look to Sophie who has silently appeared at my side. Now, you can tell that Sophie's pregnant, her seven month baby bump is poking out from under the material of her floaty bridesmaids dress. She looks adorable, but she won't believe anyone who tells her. "If it makes you feel any better, Leo is just as pissed at Jax."

I glance over to Jax, noticing he keeps looking over at Leo, who's sitting sulking in a chair, staring right at me. I frown, looking away before his intense glare can affect me. "I'm on my best behavior . If I didn't love them so much I'd have left by now." 

Sophie softly wraps her hand around the top of my arm. "Kendal would understand."

I shake my head, looking back at her as she laughs at whatever Jax has just said. "No, I can't do that to her. As long as he leaves me alone, I'll be happy."

I hear Sophie sigh. "It hasn't stopped him from staring at you all day."

"Really, I hadn't noticed." Sophie laughs, I can't help smiling. I scan the reception for any suitable men I can enjoy spending this evening with. I need to have some fun and take my mind off Mr. Jackass sitting in the corner. I can still feel his blue eyes on me. They've been fixed on me all day. He can think again if he thinks he's getting lucky with me tonight. That's one thing that's not happening ever again. I'll never go back there, I can't do that again.

I see Maisy walk out from the crowded area, heading towards Sophie and me. I inwardly sigh when I see she the look of sympathy on her face, and it's aimed at me. I feel bad for Kendal now. We gave her this shit for four years! I can't hack and it's only been four months! "How are you holding up?"

I roll my eyes, is she serious? I'm at my best friends wedding while an unbelievably sexy drummer, who gave me the best sex of my life, stares at me like he wants to have me all over again. I still dream about the sex. How the fuck does she think I'm doing?  "Oh, I’m just peachy."

She huffs loudly, throwing a quick glance at Leo.  From the tingles all over my body, he's still looking at me. "Can't you give the guy a break and just talk to him?"

I nearly choke on my drink, swallowing it down. "I'm sorry Mase, I thought you were my friend?"

She glares at me, and my hard face softens. Maisy does not glare, not at all, so she must be mad. "You know I am, don't start with that crap. Besides you can't play the friend card. Friends are supposed to tell each other shit and I don't know a thing about what happened."

I know she's hurting that I never told her anything about what went down between Leo and me. I do feel a bit of a cow for not telling her, but I can't change that now. "Well I thought you didn't want to hear other peoples shit and bitch talk."

"Dammit Tan, you know what I mean!" She whisper shouts, casting a quick glance around to see if anyone heard her. When she's reassured that no one did, she carries on in a lower tone. "This wasn't just the normal shit you all gossip about, this was important. You kept you and Leo a secret for four years! Who does that? You always spoke about him, but you never told us his name. The way you spoke about him it was like you were in love with the guy. I didn't think that was possible with some one time fuck. Now, when I look at you two, even though you won't give the guy a chance to get near you, I can see I was right. You were in love with him." I say nothing, taking a big gulp of my drink. It's fucking empty! Maisy gasps and I cringe.  I know what’s coming. I can't lie to her. I've known her since we were both six years old. She can see straight through me. "Shit, you still are aren't you?"

I feel Sophie shift beside me, but I refuse to  look at her. "Tanya?"

"That's why you won't talk to him. What happened? Why won't you talk to him?"

"I need another drink." I quickly leave them, heading over to the bar. I can feel my friends gazes burning me, but it's Leo I can sense the strongest. Fucking best friends!

***

Standing at the bar alone, I watch Jax lead a grinning Kendal into the middle of the dance floor.  It's time for their first dance. They look so happy together. I'm so relieved my friends hurting is finally over. However, I feel mine is just beginning. It hurt when Leo basically said he wanted nothing more to do with me as our friends weren't together anymore. I was so angry at him, the anger helping cover the hurt. Now that Leo's back, and I don't have to worry about Kendal and how she's doing, my feelings have hit me again. Jess comes to stand beside me, ordering herself a drink.  I'm not stupid, that's not her only reason for standing next to me. I don't question her though,because Finley just walked out onto the dance floor to join his mum and dad. It's the cutest first dance I've ever seen. He looks so adorable in his suit, which matches the guys. Well, I say suit, but it's not really. Jax managed to get his own way with his wedding suit, unlike Rhys. The only part of their clothing that resembles a suit is the blazer jacket, red shirts underneath.  They paired these with skinny black jeans and black Converse. Typical Jax.

The first dance comes to an end. Now comes the time I've been dreading since the day Kendal told me about the wedding. Jax and Kendal wanted all their friends to play a part in their day. Not only are they having a first dance, but a second dance too. Jess, Sam, Maisy, Max, Sophie, Rhys, James and his girlfriend Laura, Mark and his date Lucy and then Leo and I have to join them. I see our friends begin to move to the dance floor. Jess pulls me along with her. The burning of my friends eyes returns as they all watch me. I've no choice other than to walk right up to Leo, who's standing patiently, waiting for me. This is why my friends are watching. They're making sure I won't cause a scene over dancing with Leo. Just perfect!

He looks absolutely gorgeous, of course he would. His blazer jacket sculpting his delicious muscled arms, making me want to grab hold and squeeze tightly. The sleeves cover his sexy tattoos. I wish I could see them, run my fingers along them as we dance. I know for a fact those black jeans will hug his ass perfectly, not that I've looked. I just know. He smiles a smug, sexy smile, closing the distance between us. That smile still gives me the shivers. I can't believe he still affects me like this. He wraps his strong arms around my waist, my arms automatically reaching around his neck. I notice a new tattoo there, a thick black tribal pattern spiralling out from under his shirt, finishing under his ear. The music begins and we start to move. I don't look into his face, I can't. I don't want to look at those gorgeous blue eyes of his. I focus on his new tattoo instead. Leo pulls me closer, holding me tighter against him. I hold in my sigh at the feel of his hard body against mine. I can almost make out the ridges of his muscles. The heat from his body is calming me, that is until he speaks. "It feels so good to have you back in my arms, Tan."

He leans his mouth into the curve of my neck, breathing me in. He groans. It's such a sexy sound. My body reacts straight away to this strong alpha male holding me. I know that I'll be wet with arousal, inwardly cursing my body for betraying me. "Leo-"

I begin to protest as Leo trails his hands slowly along my body, like he’s reconnecting himself with my body once again. Leo grasps hold of my chin, lifting my head to look at him. What I see makes me stop talking. He looks sad, almost a little hopeful. Leo is normally such a cocky, confident man. The look on his face shocks me. "Tan, let me have this song yeah?"

I don't respond. Leo places a soft kiss on my mouth, his hand wandering across my body as we dance. I decide to stay quiet, letting him have this dance as he asked. His hands are possessive, holding my body against. Everyone else in the room long forgotten. Leo has all my attention, he's taken control of my body, and I let him, willingly. I allow myself to enjoy the feel of him and allow him control, just for a little while. I never lost the feelings I have for Leo. I feel them strengthen as I move my body along with his. I let myself be his again for the few minutes that remain of the song, like I used to before he broke my heart. I begin to lose myself a little to Leo as the song continues. When he leans down and kisses me, I don't fight it. I kiss him back, just as eagerly. His lips feel so good. I sigh into his mouth and Leo answers with a deep growl. As we dance and kiss, memories rush back, and I'm overwhelmed with emotion.

The song comes to an end. I keep my eyes closed so that my tears won't fall. I feel Leo's thumb and finger on my chin. He kisses me softly, again. Being back in Leo's arms felt amazing. It always did. I can't allow myself the pleasure again. It doesn't matter that I finally felt like I 'd come home, wrapped in Leo's arms. I won't let myself be hurt like I was before. Leo has the power to do that. He's a huge rock star with not just hundreds of groupies anymore, but thousands, maybe millions, who knows?

I can't compete with them!

I'm not stupid. He'll have his way with me again then throw me aside. I won't be used as his booty call whenever he fancies. Not like last time. I can't let Leo hurt me again. I don't think I could survive another heart break, no matter how great the sex.