Safe and Sound (25 page)

 
“I do.”

 
She grabbed the hand he offered, following him
around the house.
He stopped beside an old beat up red Ford truck
parked along the curb
.

 
“Is this yours?”

 
He
opened the driver’s side door and reached inside
, the faint
sickly sweet
smell of farm wafting out
.
“Technically, it’s the farmer’s I work for, but he lets me drive it whenever I need to.”

 
“Does this farmer know?
About your dad?”

 
“He suspects.
”
He paused. “
I keep to myself, Lola. I do my work and keep my mouth shut.
That’s the way I want it to be.
”

 
There was an unspoken warning in his tone to not press. Lola didn’t.

 
Jack pulled his arm out, a 10 X 13 canvas in his hands.
He held it facing him, eyes fixed on Lola’s face.

 
“This is for you.”

 
Lola took it from Jack with hands that shook, swallowing hard. Jack looked at the ground as she turned it around. Lola stared at it, overwhelmed.

 
It was
Lola
’s face
in black and white. It
was her from
before
. Lola’s eyes shone, her lips curved in a secret smile. He’d captured a part of her she’d lost.
It was beautiful, perfect.
She was better in the coal drawing, better in Jack’s eyes than she’d ever be in real life. The way he saw her…it was
awe-inspiring and
humbling.

 
“I don’t look like this,” she whispered, tears burning a trail down her cheeks.

 
“This is how I see you,” Jack answered quietly.

 
A sob escaped her and Lola turned away from Jack. He gently
tugg
ed the canvas out of her hands and pulled her toward him, his lips warm and firm against hers.

 
Jack’s body was tightly wound, his kiss passionate and consuming.
Lola’s body responded and she kissed him back with all the feeling she
had
, wanting to show him what she couldn’t say.

 
Him
.
She loved
him
.

*
**

 
Lola went back to school after missing
a week
.
People stared. She didn’t know if it was because
of
the stitches on her chin,
the fading bruises on her face,
or because they knew what had happened to her. Maybe it was all of those things.

 
She felt stupid, like a loser. Things like that were only supposed to happen to kids that asked for it, that were troublemakers and came from poor white trash families. Lola used to be that naïve at one point too
and so very
wrong
.
No longer.

 
One of the first people to approach her was Rachel. She didn’t stare at her, she didn’t eve
n speak. Rachel grabbed Lola in a tight embrace.

 
Lola hugged her back, not realizing until then how very much she’d missed her friend. It overwhelmed her, made it hard for her to speak.

 
“
Do you have to work tonight? If not, w
e’
re hanging out
. No excuses
,” Rachel stated when she pulled away, wiping at her eyes.

 
“I don’t have to work. With everything going on, they said I could have a few weeks off.
” Lola glanced around the emptying hallway. It seemed like everyone was watching them, but that couldn’t be.

 
“How did you…find out?”

 
Rachel picked at the hem of her black wrap around shirt, not looking at Lola. “Everyone knows. Not really sure how it got around, but it did. You know how people are.”

 
She also knew how judgmental, stereotypical, and
mistaken
people could be too. What they thought happened and what
really
happened were most likely two very different things.

 
The bell rang.

 
Lola
looked up and caught Roxanne’s eye. Roxanne quick
ly looked away and strode in the opposite direction. There had been no animosity in her gaze, which was a first. No Sebastian by her side either.

 
“Come on, we’re going to be late.” Rachel tugged at her hand and propelled Lola toward their first class of the day.

*
**

 
Lola looked for Jack throughout the day, missing him and longing to see him, but not once did she catch a glimpse of him. She was scared for him. He usually only missed school when his dad was especially violent. Lola imagined all sorts of terrible things and by the end of the day, she was in a panic.

 
She’d searched the halls for Isabelle, but not surprisingly hadn’
t seen her either.
Which wasn’t unusual.

 
Sebastian was another story. He was like her shadow most of the day, an overprotective, over
bearing
shadow.

 
The final bell sounded, signaling the end of the school day and there he was, hovering behind her as she hurried out of the school.
The sun instantly heated her, hot and cloying with humidity.

 
“Lola, we need to talk.”

 
“Not now, Sebastian.”
Lola took in the surrounding buildings and trees, wondering if Jack was somewhere near, watching and waiting.
She looked for an old truck that had seen better days. Lola’s shoulders slumped when she found not a trace of Jack.

 
“Yes, now.” Sebastian pulled her around to face him.
He looked like he was searching for words, like he thought if he said the wrong thing she would break.

 
“Call me later, Lola,” Rachel said with a wave, smiling at Lola. She nudged Sebastian’s shoulder as she passed and Lola didn’t miss the way Sebastian’s eyes followed
Rachel
as she walked away.
Interesting.

 
“I need to…” Sebastian sighed, ran a hand through his hair. “Can I give you a
ride
home?”

 
Lola searched for Jack once more before giving up and focusing her attention on Sebastian. “Okay.
”

 
She waited until they were in the car to say, “You know, I’m not going to fall apart.”

 
He fiddled with
buttons and knobs
, turning the air conditioning on.
Almost immediate relief
washed over Lola’s flushed skin.

 
Sebastian pulled the car out of the parking lot
, eyes trained straight ahead
. “I don’t know what you mean.”

 
“
You
.
Hovering
.
I’m fine.
I don’t need a bodyguard.
”

 
“I want to be there for you, Lola.”

 
“Why?”

 
He glanced at her, frowning.
“Because we’re friends.
That’s what friends do.
”

 
Lola took a deep breath and stared out the passenger window. “We haven’t talked in a year, Sebastian.”

 
“I know.
I don’t know what
I did to push you away
, but
I’m sorry.”

 
“
I’m
sorry,” she interrupted, twisting her body to face him.
“
It’s my fault.
I pushed you away. I thought I was protecting you. I’
m sorry for that. But it doesn’t change the fact we haven’t talked in a long time. We don’t even know each other anymore. You’ve changed.
I’ve
changed
.
”

 
I’ve changed so much.

 
The car came to a stop. They were at Blair’s.

 
“I know that, Lola. But what
hasn’t
changed is how I feel about you. I love you. You know that. You’re my oldest friend. Yeah, things are awkward now, but it’ll get better.”

 
He reached over and
touched her cheek
. “You’ve been through something terrible
, something you never should have gone through. I want to help you, to be
t
here for you.”

 
Lola put her hand on his.
“Sebastian, you were there for me when it mattered most. Don’t ever forget that.
”

 
He tugged his hand away and looked out the window, jaw tight.
“It never s
hould have gotten to that point.
I should have done more. I should have figured it out sooner. The way you were acting…”

 
“Don’t put any blame on yourself, Sebastian. You did what you could and I will forever be grateful for that.
For you.”

  
Sebastian turned back to her, offering a semblance of a smile.
“We’ll get through this, Lola, and be stronger friends because of it. You just watch.”

 
His optimism was admirable
and maybe naïve
.
She wished she could be so unfailingly confident about it.

 
“I don’t know how to make it better, to get past this awkwardness, Sebastian.
We don’t know each other anymore.
”

 
He smiled. “I refuse to believe that.
Deep down, where it matters
, we’re still the same
.
”

 
In her friend’s smile, Lola allowed herself to feel hope for the first time in a long time. True, she and Sebastian could never have the kind of friendship they used to have, but maybe it could be
better
.
Different, but better.

 
The closeness they’d shared was gone and Lola didn’t
know if
it would ever come back, but
there was no reason they couldn’t be friends
.

 
Stop pushing people away.

 
She smiled, a small laugh
falling from her lips
. Lola
reached across the console and
hugged her friend
, feeling a little more whole
.
“I’ve missed you.”

 
Sebastian squeezed her to him.
“Me too.”

 
“One condition.”

 
He
pulled back, grinning. “What’s that?”

 
“Stop being my bigger, more muscular shadow.”

 
“Deal.”

 
Lola opened the door and got out; Sebastian followed.
She
immediately
longed for the cool interior of the car
,
her
skin
rapidly
damp
with
perspiration
.

 
They
walked up the porch steps. At the door, Lola
took a deep breath and
turned.
There was something she had to say
, something they needed to discuss
if they were ever going to move on
.

 
“I remember what you said to me the last time we talked, before we stopped talking
all together
.
That had nothing to do with my avoidance of you. You know that, right?
”

 
Sebastian averted his eyes.
“Yeah.
Sure.”

 
He didn’t believe her. Was that why Sebastian had kept his distance for so long? Had he been embarrassed
? The things he must have thought.

 
Lola touched his shoulder.
“Sebastian, it had nothing to do with you asking me out, although the timing was really terrible.”

 
He looked at her, caught her smile, and shook his head in self-derision. “I tend to
have bad timing a lot
.”