Second Look (A New Beginning Book 3) (11 page)

Sarah, 8:39pm:
I heard about your dad. I’m sorry.

Adam frowned, unsure how to respond. Under normal circumstances, he would have ignored her text.

But, damn. It had been a really shitty day and he craved a little break from the constant ache in his chest. It probably made him an asshole to even consider texting her back.

Adam, 8:42pm:
Thank you.

Sarah, 8:42pm:
How you holding up?

Adam, 8:43pm:
It was a hard day.

Sarah, 8:43pm:
Understatement of the year.

Adam, 8:44pm:
You can say that again.

Sarah, 8:44pm:
Understatement of the year.

Adam chuckled. It felt good to laugh at the stupid joke. Sarah’s next message made him groan. How could he refuse that?

Sarah, 8:47pm:
I’m here if you need me. If you need company or … whatever…

Adam, 8:49pm:
Oh yeah?

Sarah, 8:49pm:
Yeah

Adam, 8:49pm:
I’d rather not be alone right now

Sarah, 8:50pm:
Head on over, handsome

Adam, 8:49pm:
Be there in a bit

What could it hurt to see her one more time?

Chapter Eight

Jennifer

Reliving past mistakes

“Just call him.”

Mandi made it sound so damn easy.

Jennifer had a bite of a gooey caramel roll on her fork, halfway up to her mouth. She glared at Mandi. “I’m. Not. Ready.”

They were sitting at Jennifer’s house. Mandi was across from her at her kitchen table, a cup of coffee warming her cold hands. She could see the steam rising above Mandi’s coffee.

Shortly after her dad’s funeral, Mandi started mentioning Adam in their regular conversations.

Why did I have to ask how he was?

Mandi let go of her cup and threw up her arms in the air and gave a quick huff of her breath. “Why not? The guy is miserable. He saw you at the funeral, you know. I had to blow him off and keep my mouth shut when he mentioned you.”

She covered her face with her hands and her response was garbled. “I just…I need a little more time, okay?”

“Fine. But I’m not sure how much longer I can hold out on him. He’s pretty pathetic and I feel sorry for him.”

Jennifer groaned. “Okay, soon. I promise.”

“Fine.” Mandi sipped her coffee and said, “So, what time are we leaving?”

“After Amber finishes her movie.”

Mandi nodded and smiled.

She grinned back. As much as she missed Tera and Lily, she was glad to be home.

Jennifer and Mandi became best friends in high school. Cassandra came into the picture shortly after Mandi. The three of them had been friends ever since, well, for most of those years anyway.

There was a period of time when Jennifer purposely stopped all communication with Mandi and Cassandra. It was the most painful couple of years of her life.

Six years ago…

There it was.

A little pink plus sign.

Pregnant. About two months already, if she did the math correctly.

Adam broke her heart and knocked her up at the same time. Brilliant.

She couldn’t stop the hysterical laugh that bubbled up. It was an odd response to a stressful situation, but that was typical for Jennifer. She was the girl who laughed at funerals.

She always wanted to have children with Adam. Just not like this.

Her phone beeped with a text. She glanced at the screen. Her eyes filled with tears. She missed her best friend and needed her now more than ever.

Mandi:
Hey girl! How ya doing?

Jennifer:
I’m good. You?

Mandi:
I’m well. Anything new? I miss you!

Jennifer:
Nothing new. Miss you too. So, can I ask you something?

Mandi
: Of course

Jennifer
: Is Adam still seeing that baker chick?

Mandi
: Do you really want to know?

Jennifer
: Yeah, I do.

Mandi
: They seem to be getting pretty serious. Always together.

Jennifer
: What’s she like?

Mandi
: I actually really like her. I’m sorry :(

Jennifer
: No apologies necessary. I’m happy for them.

No, I’m not. Not at all.

Why did she even ask? Oh yeah, she needed to decide if she was going to tell Adam about the baby. Apparently she had her answer.

She could feel her heart break into a million pieces.

*****

Jennifer looked at her best friend and remembered how painful it was to push Mandi and Cassandra away.

Thinking back on it now, it was hard to believe she kept that from her friends or Adam because it was so wrong. At the time, she was convinced it was the right thing to do. That she was somehow saving them by not telling them.

She didn’t want to put Mandi through anything that would remind her of her own horrible experience. How could she expect Mandi to watch her have a baby when she was still grieving the baby she lost? It would be selfish.

If she didn’t tell Mandi, she wouldn’t be able to tell Cassandra. She couldn’t expect Cass to keep a secret this big. It was like the two of them went hand in hand.

It was simple why she didn’t tell Adam. He made his choice over winter break when he chose another woman over her. Jennifer was fully aware of Adam and his beliefs about children and marriage. She knew with absolute certainty Adam would end his relationship with the other woman just because Jennifer was pregnant.

She didn’t want to be a choice he resented his whole life. So she made the choice for him.

She withdrew from her friends slowly, turning down requests to visit, not texting back, not answering phone calls. Mandi and Cassandra would text her little updates here and there to keep in touch, but she didn’t usually respond. Eventually, the texts and phone calls stopped, other than an occasional hello.

She was thankful for her friends in California and for her parents who supported her through the hardest time of her life, but it wasn’t the same. It hurt like hell not to have her best friends.

It was Cassandra who called to let her know Adam was getting married.

Jennifer felt like her heart shattered into a million pieces hearing the man she thought she’d marry was marrying someone else.

At that point that she realized she owed it to Adam to tell him he was a father. Amber was already 18 months and it was time he knew the truth.

She had to admit when they later found out Adam wasn’t even Amber’s father, Jennifer never really expected to hear from her best friends again.

How could she ask for their forgiveness when she couldn’t forgive herself?

Jennifer couldn’t have been more surprised when a year later Mandi called her and grilled her with questions about her daughter. It was a shock to find out Adam had never told anyone what happened, not even his family. His dad had been there when she showed up at his house on Adam’s wedding day, so she always assumed everyone knew and hated her.

Mandi was hurt and upset at both her and Adam that she had to hear the story from the woman Adam left at the altar.

It was such a relief to hear from Mandi that Jennifer confessed everything and begged for her forgiveness. It took time for Jennifer to earn their trust again, but she, Cassandra and Mandi all slowly became friends once again.

She vowed to never mess up their friendship again.

*****

“Earth to Jennifer.” Her eyes focused and she saw Mandi waving her hand in front of her face. “Where were you just now?”

Jennifer gave a half-hearted laugh. “Just thinking about the past. It’s hard not to when it’s catching up to me. Again. Seeing Adam was hard, Mandi. I don’t know what to say to him. So much has happened, so many things I regret. You’re well aware of everything.”

Mandi looked thoughtful before she replied. “I know. He has regrets, too. You were both young, Jennifer. You both made mistakes. I certainly made my fair share, as you well know. But you learn and grow from them and the mistakes are what make life so interesting. You’ve both grown up quite a bit.”

She nodded and shrugged, her eyes filling.

Mandi smiled. “And it’s about damn time.”

Jennifer laughed through her tears. Leave it to Mandi to lighten the mood. “When did you get so wise?”

“I’m getting old,” she said with a grin. “Okay, depressing conversation is over! What do you think of the caramel rolls?”

“They’re amazing. Where did you get them?”

Jennifer shoved more of the pastry into her mouth and closed her eyes, enjoying the sweet roll with her coffee. They were sheer perfection on a Sunday morning.

Mandi hesitated before answering, which made Jennifer suspicious. “Uh, Dessert First.”

“Should that sound familiar to me? Because it doesn’t.” Jennifer’s eyebrows furrowed.

“Uh, well. Not really. It’s Abby’s bakery.” Mandi’s said quietly when she answered her.

Jennifer looked confused, and then finally it dawned on her. “Adam’s Abby?”

“Well, she’s not Adam’s Abby anymore, but yes, that Abby.”

Suddenly the caramel roll tasted more like sawdust and became like a lead weight in her stomach. “Oh. I see.”

“She’s really nice, Jennifer.” Mandi’s voice took on a defensive tone. “I’m still pretty close to her, even after everything that happened. She
was
going to be my sister-in-law. And let’s not forget she did absolutely nothing wrong.”

“Yes, of course, Mandi. It just surprised me.”

It shouldn’t have bothered Jennifer that the delicious caramel rolls were from Abby’s store or that Mandi was still her friend, but for some reason, it did. After all, she was the woman Adam left her for. Twice.

As if reading her thoughts, Mandi said, “It’s history. Let’s just say Abby ended up with the right guy, and it wasn’t my brother. I’ve always held out hope that you and Adam would get back together.”

The corners of Mandi’s lips turned up in a small smile while Jennifer’s smile faded.

“I don’t think that’ll ever happen.”

Mandi tilted her head. “You never know.”

Jennifer rolled her eyes and sighed.

“So, how’s it going with your online boyfriend? Any news? Are you ever going to meet him?”

“Oh, smooth one, Jennifer,” Mandi said and rolled her eyes, but she took the hint and answered. “Luke and I email a couple times per week but we haven’t spoken on the phone yet or made plans to get together. He lives in southern Minnesota, so for now we’re just talking. He mentioned he’s been looking for a new job, and wants to move further up north, but who knows. It may be months or even longer before that happens.”

“What does he do?”

“Mechanical engineer. He said there are jobs out there, but he’s looking for one around here.” Mandi sighed at this bit of information.

It was too bad he didn’t just live here now. “Oh, well, I hope Luke finds a job here soon so you two can meet and see if he’s as great in person as he is online.”

Mandi grinned. “That’d be nice, wouldn’t it?”

Amber spoke up from the living room, where the credits from the movie Rapunzel were rolling and said, “Is it time to go to the waterpark now, mommy?”

“You bet, peanut butter! Go get your swimsuit on and we’ll get going!” Jennifer replied, excited for Amber to get to try out Bunker Beach.

Mandi suggested earlier in the week they take her there because it had a great kiddie play area, a wave pool, water slides and a lazy river.

Mandi and Jennifer finished their coffee and breakfast and then started gathering up the beach bags, sunscreen and towels. They were meeting Cassandra at the pool.

Jennifer couldn’t wait to spend the day in the sun having fun with her three favorite girls.

*****

“So, Cassandra, Noah dating anyone these days?” Jennifer asked as she leaned back in her sun lounger chair.

Jennifer hadn’t seen Noah since she got back to Minnesota, other than a glimpse at the funeral. He was ruggedly handsome and always had a 5 o’clock shadow.

Cassandra’s eyes narrowed at her. “Not that I’m aware.”

Jennifer laughed at her possessive look and Mandi joined in. “What’s that look for? He’s a free man, isn’t he?”

She looked out towards where Amber was splashing in the kiddie pool. She found a little friend and was having so much fun she didn’t even want Jennifer to play out there with her.

“Well, yeah, I guess.”

“He’s hot as hell and nice as can be. I’m pretty sure any woman would be happy to date him.” Jennifer smirked. “Why? Would you be jealous?”

Jennifer’s mouth was practically watering at the thought of Cassandra’s best friend. Noah’s body was very fit from being an exercise fanatic. His handsome face and piercing gray eyes were almost hypnotizing. Girls had drooled over that man since high school and he’d only improved with age.

“Of course not. We’re just friends.”

“Hmm, I don’t buy it. I see the way he looks at you.”

Cassandra narrowed her eyes at Mandi. “And what way is that?”

Mandi grinned, and replied, “Like he wants to eat you for dinner.”