Second Look (A New Beginning Book 3) (8 page)

They sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes, sipping on their drinks and looking around the bar. It gave Jennifer time to think back to what happened to her best friend years ago.

Mandi started dating Jake before Jennifer even knew her and they always claimed they’d get married right after college. When she got pregnant in her second year at the University of Minnesota, they decided to speed up the process and got married.

For months they prepared for their baby, taking classes, reading books and stocking up on tiny diapers. Jake worked extra hours and catered to all of Mandi’s cravings.

It was pretty cute to see how excited they both were about becoming parents.

Mandi was seven and a half months pregnant when she realized something was wrong. An ultrasound confirmed their worst fear. What came after that was something Jennifer wouldn’t wish on her worse enemy.

Jennifer could still remember the tiny casket. It was the saddest funeral she’d ever attended and it broke her heart to see her best friend suffering.

Afterward, Mandi shut everyone out, including Jake. She knew her best friend was miserable, but none of them knew what to do to help her. They took turns staying with her and her mom took her to see a counselor. Eventually she started to improve.

None of them saw it coming when Mandi filed for divorce a couple months later. Initially he refused, but nothing he did or said would change her mind. Shortly after he signed the papers, Jake transferred schools and moved out of state.

Mandi hadn’t heard from Jake since.

Her best friend never gave them a good explanation for divorcing him, but she and Cassandra both had a feeling there was more to it than her inability to cope with her loss. Mandi refused to discuss it and they both gave up trying to get her to talk.

Jennifer raised her glass to her friend. “To you and Luke.”

Mandi simply smiled and clinked her glass to Jennifer’s and then Cassandra’s before taking a big sip.

Jennifer needed to think of something else, so she decided to pester Cassandra. “So, how’s Noah?”

Cassandra smiled. “He’s great!”

“Has he asked you on a date yet?”

Cassandra rolled her eyes, “No, and you ask me that every time.”

Jennifer grinned. “Well, one of these times you’re going to say yes.”

Cassandra shook her head and rolled her eyes again. “Tell us more about your sexy doctor.”

“There’s nothing to tell. He was hot and it was just a fling.”

“There’s got to be more to it than that.”

She shrugged.

As if Mandi sensed she wasn’t going to spill, she changed the subject. “I know you may not want to hear this, but Adam was asking for your number.”

Her stomach dropped and she paused before asking, “Did you give it to him?”

Mandi shook her head. “Of course not. But eventually he’s going to find out you’re back home. You should just talk to him and get it over with.”

Cassandra patted her hand. “I agree, sweetie.”

“I know it’s not my business, but he’s also my brother. You were both hurt and both made mistakes. It wasn’t just him.” Mandi held her hand up when Jennifer opened her mouth to defend herself. “Just think about it. Maybe it’s time to talk to him so you can both move on with your boring lives.”

Cassandra was nodding her head in agreement to what Mandi said.

Jennifer opened her mouth, but closed it without knowing what to say.

Mandi was right. She was avoiding Adam, but not because she was mad at him. They both made mistakes and both were hurt. She was avoiding him because she was afraid if she saw him she wouldn’t be able to stop herself from wanting him again and she didn’t know if her heart could survive being rejected.

“Okay, enough of this guy talk.” Mandi tapped her hands on the table. “Who’s ready for a shot?”

Cassandra groaned the same time Jennifer did. “You’re crazy, girlfriend.”

The rest of the night flew by. They had a few too many drinks, played too many pull-tabs and even won a big package of pork chops. That would never have happened in California or Arizona, she was pretty sure about that.

Jennifer took a cab home, stumbled inside and went to bed without taking her clothes off. To her frustration, she woke up after a vivid and very steamy dream about Adam.

Talking about him messed with her head. It was so lifelike that she sat straight up in bed and looked down beside her.

She had to make sure she was, in fact, alone.

*****

On Sunday, Jennifer went back to her parents’ house to pick up Amber. They moved out to Annandale a couple years after she graduated high school. They owned the property for a long time, but after her dad retired, they built their dream house out on the lake.

Jennifer slowly got out of the car and walked up the front walkway. Her dad had a green thumb. He planted several different colors of clematis, which were in full bloom and climbing almost wildly up the trellis. The colors were amazing; violet, raspberry, blue and deep purple flowers covered the sides and front of their house.

The peonies in pink, white and dark pink surrounded the well and he planted a magnolia tree since she was last there and the blooms were fragrant and absolutely stunning. The only thing she missed were the lilacs, which were already done blooming, and she was sad not to see those.

Their yard was meticulously kept, with grass so perfect she could envision him on his hands and knees cutting it with scissors.

She finally stopped gazing at the flowers and was about to knock on their front door when it opened and her mom came out, pulling her into a tight hug.

“Well, hello, mom,” Jennifer said in a muffled voice with her face in her mom’s shoulder.

“Oh, honey, we had the best time with Amber. She is absolutely a treasure! We’re so glad you’re back in Minnesota. We missed you so much.” Her mom said all this in a rush, tears in her eyes.

“I’m glad to hear it, mom. Where’s my little girl?”

“She’s taking a nap. I thought maybe we could talk a little while she’s asleep. Would you like some coffee?” Her mom reminded her of a hummingbird. She never stopped moving for a minute, always wanting to be sure everyone had what they needed.

“Sure, that sounds great, mom.”

They walked into the kitchen where her dad was sitting at the kitchen table, coffee cup in hand, Sunday paper open to the crossword puzzle. He had a pencil in his hand and he was swearing at the paper.

As soon as he saw Jennifer, a smile formed and he tossed the pencil aside. “Jennifer! I’m so glad to see you! That little Amber of yours is a sweet little girl. We had so much fun together! We took her on several boat rides, she caught a fish and she went swimming with grandma.”

Her dad’s excitement made his eyes shine.

“That’s great, dad. I’m glad you took her out on the lake. She’s never been on a boat.” Jennifer smiled.

Her mom spoke up then, nodding in agreement and saying, “She loved it! She reminds me so much of you when you were little, honey. We’re so glad you and Amber are home! We want to make up for lost time!”

Jennifer stood there and looked back and forth between her parents.

“I’m really glad too, mom. It’s really good to be home again.” She had tears in her eyes, realizing just how much she meant it. She said, “It’s not like you haven’t seen us, though. We saw each other a couple times a year.”

“That’s nowhere near enough, honey.” Her dad said with a frown.

“Agreed, dad. Amber’s excited to experience Minnesota, that’s for sure. I hope you can really get to know her by seeing us a lot more often.”

“You can bet on it, honey, Jennifer,” her mom told her firmly.

Amber appeared in the living room, awake from her nap and rubbing the sleep from her eyes, but then her eyes widened when she saw Jennifer.

“Mommy!”

Amber ran towards her mom and jumped into Jennifer’s outstretched arms. Jennifer caught her mom’s eye and could see the tears.

*****

The nurses working with her were really starting to click. They listened to her advice, they showed her the utmost respect and they had even started to ask her to join them for lunch. Two weeks in and things were going so well. She was sure she made the right decision to come home.

As her day progressed, she was called down to the second floor to check on a patient in the ER. She walked by a man who was being brought into a room in a wheelchair. He was very sick, oxygen mask on his thin face and IV already in place.

She was not prepared to see Rob, Adam and Mandi’s dad, like that. He was a tall, fit, handsome man and it shocked her to see him that way. He was being admitted and she resolved to call Mandi the second she got home.

She didn’t have time to go in and see him before seeing her patient and then afterward she was so busy she couldn’t stop by. However, as soon as her shift was over, she went directly to his room and prepared herself not only to see him in this condition, but also figured Adam, Mandi or Gina, their mom, could be there.

She knocked on Rob’s door and then entered when she heard his soft, weak voice call out, telling her to come in.

She chose the exact right time to be there. She was sure the family was there most of the day, but she happened to choose a time when he was alone. He was awake and looked so ill that she had to choke back tears.

“Rob?” Jennifer had always been told to call him by his first name. He always insisted Mr. Jackson was his father.

He gave her a weak smile and in a tired voice, he said, “Jennifer? Is that you?”

“Yes. I came to check on you. I saw you come in but haven’t been able to stop by until now.”

“Mandi told me you were back home.”

His voice was hoarse, and she could hear the crackling with each breath he took so it was likely pneumonia. Working as a nurse in a hospital, she saw it all. When encountering people who knew they were dying, often times she saw them accepting their fate a lot better than the people who loved them. There’s a point when they know it’s time, but they hold on for the family members for as long as they can. It’s once the family has finally accepted its time to move on is often when they let go.

“Yes. It’s good to be back home.” She paused, looking at his forced breathing. “What are you in here with? Pneumonia?”

“Yes. It’s not good. I know it. My family knows it.” It was clear to Jennifer he had already prepared himself for the worst and it looked like he had made peace with it.

Jennifer paused for a moment before she could say anything else, swallowing down the lump in her throat. “I’m so sorry, Rob. Is there anything I can do?”

“Actually, yes. Mandi also told me you won’t talk to Adam.”

Well that was direct.

She shrugged her shoulders in response. She stared at his eyes, which had once been a bright amber color but were now dull and sad.

Rob took another labored breath before he continued. What he said must have used all of his energy.

“You actually just missed him. He was here just a few minutes ago. He wants to talk to you. He feels bad about the way things were left. He doesn’t have any expectations.”

Rob paused because at that point he had a long and painful coughing fit. Jennifer handed him water and he sipped until the coughing subsided.

“It would mean the world to me if you would talk to him.”

What was she supposed to say?
He’s a dying man. Enough said.

“Okay. For you, I will.”

Rob’s tired, dull eyes lit up for the briefest of moments.

“Thank you, Jennifer. It’s funny. I always thought you two would end up together. I guess I was wrong.”

Again, she shrugged her shoulders. She seemed to be at a loss for words.

“Do you have a picture of that little girl of yours?”

Jennifer smiled. “Absolutely.”

She grabbed the hospital badge she wore and flipped it over. She started taping Amber’s latest picture onto the back of her badge to always have her there when she was at work.

His voice was soft when he said, “She’s beautiful. Looks just like you.”

Another coughing fit wracked Rob’s frail form. It looked so painful and the talking wasn’t helping much. Jennifer could tell he was very tired, so it was time for her to go.

“I’ll leave you to rest. I wish I were seeing you under better circumstances.”

“It was really good to see you, Jennifer. I wish you the best in the future. Take good care of that little girl of yours.”

“I will.”

Jennifer leaned down, gave him a hug and then walked out of the room as fast as possible. She didn’t want him to see the tears streaming down her face. This could be the last time she would see him.

Her heart broke for their family.

As she left the hospital, she tried to prepare herself for the inevitable. Not only would she have to attend the funeral for a man she once thought would be her father-in-law, but she would also place a phone call to Adam because she made a promise to a dying man.

She didn’t look forward to either.

*****

After Jennifer got Amber into bed that evening, she called Mandi. They talked for a long time. Mandi knew her dad’s time was very short and was trying to come to terms with it.

“How’s your mom?”

“She keeps a strong front, but I know she’s barely hanging on.”

Jennifer could hear Mandi’s voice crack again and the tears started to fall down her own cheeks again.

Several seconds later, she calmed down enough to ask a question she may eventually regret.

“How’s Adam doing?”

Mandi paused for several seconds and Jennifer could only imagine what she was thinking. It was the first time she asked about Adam in a very long time.

“He’s trying to be strong for me and my mom. But truthfully, he’s not doing very well.”

Jennifer sighed. “I can only imagine. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t think my dad has much longer. I am not going to be able to handle this very well.” Mandi’s voice was strained.

“I don’t know what to say other than I’m sorry and I love you.”

It was such a hard conversation. Mandi was right that he didn’t have much time based on how he looked and it was hard to accept.