Secret for a Nightingale (50 page)

“And what are you doing now?”

“We are waiting, Eliza and I, to see what there will be for us.”

The Head Deaconess smiled from me to Eliza.

“You have worked together,” she said.

“Oh yes, and we hope to continue to do so. Eliza Miss Flynn is dedicated to nursing.”

“Yes,” said Eliza.

“I know it is what I want to do.”

“That is the spirit we need. And the nurse who came with you on your last visit, Miss Pleydell, is now married?”

“She is in Constantinople. She married a Frenchman connected with the French Legation out there.”

“Ah yes … our allies. A very pleasant personality but I do not think a dedicated nurse. It’s a hard profession, as you have had reason to know.”

“It is and all,” Eliza agreed.

“And we have to be devoted enough to accept hardships. I have arranged for you to have a room to yourselves. I dare say you would like to go to it now. We will talk more later.”

“Thank you,” I said; and the Deaconess who had received us when we arrived was summoned and showed us to the room.

It was very small resembling a cell. There were two beds in it, a chair and a cupboard and a small table. The walls were bare except for a crucifix.

“What a woman,” Eliza said, ‘and she runs this place! “

I nodded.

“Eliza, you don’t understand how honoured we are. A room to ourselves! Henrietta and I slept in a sort of dormitory, divided into cubicles. This is luxury.”

“It’s lovely,” said Eliza.

“Fancy running a place like this! I want to see the wards. I want to see how it’s done. And with that forest all round you and the trees and all that…”

“I’m glad you like it, Eliza. I’m glad you’ve come. She might have something to offer us. If she did … oh, but it’s early days yet.

Let’s wait and see. “

Later we talked again with the Head Deaconess. She questioned us at

length about the methods used at Scutari. We told her of the horrendous lack of equipment, the diseases with which we had had to cope, and which had proved to be more disastrous than the wounds received in battle. She admitted that she was very concerned with sanitation and she believed that if it were not adequate it could be the major cause of death.

It was very interesting to talk to her and I was immensely flattered by the manner in which she took me into her confidence. I was also grateful for her acceptance of Eliza, for she included her in the talk, and listened attentively when she expressed an opinion.

I had rarely seen Eliza so greatly pleased; she was obviously enjoying the visit.

That night I lay in my bed, with Eliza in the other one and I was so glad she was with me. I was so fond other, and I did want life to be happy for her. She was such a good woman in spite of her attempts to prove otherwise.

Dear Eliza, I really was as capable of taking care of myself as she was of herself. Yet was I? I had, in spite of myself, become involved with someone who could never bring me happiness. I lay there thinking of my previous visit here. That was in the days before I had met Dr. Adair. It was strange how my life seemed divided into sections; the time before I had been aware of his existence, followed by those years when he had been a shadowy figure of menace; and then the actual confrontation.

At length I slept and dreamed of him. I was in the forest and Gerda the goose girl was there. It was all muddled and I was glad to awake from it.

Eliza was in high spirits.

“What lovely air!” she cried.

“Oh, I love the smell of them trees.

It’s peaceful here. I’m glad I came. It’ll be good to work here for a bit. “

I smiled at her. It was so wonderful to see her happy.

How well I remembered the long wooden table at which we sat down to oatmeal and rye bread, and the drink of ground rye. The Deaconesses remembered me and showed their pleasure in seeing me again. They were welcoming to Eliza. So much had

happened since I had been here; but in some ways it felt as though I had never left.

After breakfast we were taken round the wards. After that we went to the Head Deaconess’s sanctum for more talks.

I was delighted that Eliza was able to contribute in a way which showed her ability. She said she would like to work in the wards while she was here, for she had seen that there was room for more nursing.

So it was agreed that we should start on the next day.

“Take a little rest this afternoon,” said the Head Deaconess.

“You’ve had a long journey and you need to recover from it. I know how you used to like to walk in the forest, Miss Pleydell.”

So in the afternoon I took Eliza for a walk, just as Henrietta and I used to when she was here.

Eliza loved the place. She said: “I’ve never seen anything like this.

What’s them bells you hear in the distance every now and then? “

I explained that the bells were worn by the cows who could easily get lost in the forest.

“The bells, of course, indicate where they are.”

She was enchanted.

We passed the cottage where Gerda’s grandmother had lived. There was no sign of anyone there. When we came to a clearing I suggested we sit down for a while.

Eliza said: “I’d like to work here. There’s a peace about it. You see I dunno how to say it … it’s as though some things don’t matter at all. Everyone is important and yet not important, if you know what I mean.”

“I think I do, Eliza.”

“When you get married …”

“Oh, but I’m not sure.”

“You’re going to marry Dr. Fenwick if you’ve got any sense.”

“Perhaps I haven’t.”

“Yes, you have. Your head’s screwed on the right way. It’s just you’re dazzled, that’s all. And you can’t see straight for a bit. You’re going to marry him because he’s right for you … and you’re going to be all right. But what about me?”

“Eliza, you’ll always be my friend and welcome wherever I am.”

“I know that. It’s not easy for me to say this. I think the world of you. You’re a fine woman, Anna. You’re one of the best. I’m never going to forget what you done for Ethel … and for me, too.”

“You exaggerate. It was Dr. Adair who saved Tom for Ethel.”

“Him! Oh, showing off, that’s all. It was you what done it.”

“That’s ridiculous, Eliza.”

“I’m getting silly in my old age. I was just saying that I want you to get what you deserve. I reckon you’ll have a lot of kids and you’ll be happy ever after, for that Dr. Fenwick’s a good man and good men don’t grow on trees. From what I know of them they’re as rare as snow in July.”

“You’re an old cynic, Eliza. Don’t let’s talk about me. What would you like to happen to you? If you could have a wish, what would it be?”

“I’d like to be that Head Deaconess in a place like this with a hospital all my own. I’d do it my way. I’d have the best little hospital in the world. Funny … when we got to Scutari I wanted to come straight back. I wondered what I’d let myself in for. And then . after seeing what we did … I was just glad I was there. I knew I wanted to nurse the sick. There’s nothing I want to do more than that.”

“I know how you feel.”

We sat on the grass, our backs against a tree and she told me of her dreams. She had loved this place immediately. She wanted to have a hospital of her own where she could make the rules, where she could dedicate herself to the sick.

We talked for a long time and Eliza had never been so self-revealing.

I loved her very much and I prayed that one day her dreams might be realized, for hers was a noble ambition.

Someone was tapping at the door. It was one of the younger Deaconesses. The Head Deaconess was asking me to go at once to her sanctum.

We had just returned from our walk and Eliza still looked bemused, still in the dream of being in charge of a hospital || like I said: “I’d better go at once.”

I knocked at the door of the sanctum.

“Come in,” called the Head Deaconess and I entered.

A man was standing with his back to the window.

“Oh, there you are,” said the Head Deaconess.

“I am so glad you have come in. You two know each other well, I believe.”

I stared at him disbelievingly. He had been so consistently in my thoughts that for a moment I thought I had conjured up this image of him. I heard myself stammering: “Dr. Adair …”

“The same,” he said.

“How pleasant to find you here.”

He had come forward to take my hand.

“I have heard some account of Scutari from Miss Pleydell,” said the Head Deaconess.

“I feel honoured to have you both here … and Miss Flynn, too. You have shared a terrible but wonderful experience.”

“We only did what was expected of us. Isn’t that so. Miss Pleydell?”

“Yes, of course. We just worked hard and did the best we could.”

“It must have been very different from Kaiserwald,” said the Head Deaconess.

“Completely different,” he said.

“Do sit down … both of you. Did you enjoy your walk in the forest.

Miss Pleydell? Miss Pleydell is enamoured of our forest, Dr. Adair.

”

“I can understand that. It’s an enchanting place. Romantic, eh. Miss Pleydell?”

“Yes, I find it so.”

He brought a chair and held it while I sat down. I looked over my shoulder and thanked him. He was smiling slightly sardonically and I could not interpret the meaning of that smile.

“Pray be seated yourself, Dr. Adair. Miss Pleydell, Dr. Adair has been discussing some project with me and he thinks you may well be involved in it… for I told him you were here.”

I turned to look at him. I thought I detected a mischievous look in his eyes.

“Yes, Miss Pleydell. I was delighted when I heard that you had arrived in Kaiserwald. This project concerns Rosenwald … a place not unlike Kaiserwald not so large, nor so well ordered.” He smiled gallantly at the Head Deaconess, who bowed her head well pleased and murmured:

“We were not always as we are now, Dr. Adair. It takes time to develop a place.”

“But you do agree that in time … with the right Head … Rosenwald could become a Kaiserwald?”

“I certainly believe it could with the right persons working together . dedicated people who are ready to make sacrifices.”

“We all have the highest respect for your abilities. Miss Pleydell.”

“I’m glad to hear it.”

“The fact is, I am going out to inspect the place. The Head Deaconess cannot of course make the journey with me. We have discussed the matter together and have come to the conclusion that as you are here so fortuitously’ he gave me that smile again ‘well, my idea is that you should visit Rosenwald with me and give me your opinion of its possibilities.”

“With some object in view?”

“I don’t know what your plans are.”

“You mean that I might work at this place?”

“I want your opinion of it. You have proved yourself to be a good nurse. You may discover a great enthusiasm to build up this place ..

”

“That would mean giving up my home … everything …”

“You are looking too far ahead. Come with me tomorrow. We shall inspect the place together and you will tell me what you think of its possibilities. I am leaving for Rosenwald tomorrow morning early … on horseback. You do ride, don’t you. Miss Pleydell?”

“Yes, I ride. But I have no habit with me.”

“Could we fit her out?” he asked.

The Head Deaconess thought it might be possible. No one in the hospital rode, of course, but there was Fraulein Kleber who was a great horsewoman and would be ready to lend what was needed.

“If that could be arranged today we could leave tomorrow morning. It will take us the whole morning to get there. But we could be back before nightfall. If there were any difficulties we could stay at Rosenwald.”

The Head Deaconess was looking rather concerned. I imagined she thought we should have a chaperon. I thought she was going to suggest that one of the Deaconesses should accompany us but I dismissed that thought as I knew none of them could ride.

I said: “Eliza Flynn is here with me, Dr. Adair. You may remember her.”

He frowned in concentration.

“She was rather big … a very efficient nurse.”

“Ah yes,” he said.

“Big Eliza. I don’t think she should be a member of the party. But does she ride well?”

“I’m almost certain that she does not.”

“I have planned that you and I should go alone, Miss Pleydell. We don’t want a crowd. It is just to look over, to assess possibilities and so on …”

I could not help it, but my spirits were rising. I was going to spend a whole day in his company. I did not think for one moment that I should want to work at Rosenwald. All I cared about was that he had come back and that I was going to be with him alone . for a whole day.

I really did not think beyond that.

Eliza was dumbfounded.

“That man … here!”

“Don’t be surprised. It’s only natural that he should be here. He’s a famous doctor. He’s interested in places like this. Germany has been the centre of some of Europe’s best hospitals and it is only natural that now all this reform is going to take place, people should come here.”

“I believe he’s arranged all this. He got you here …”

“Oh, Eliza, don’t be absurd! Why should he?”

“Because he’s interested in you. He’s finished with Henrietta and now it’s your turn.”

“I tell you it’s a hospital we’re going to see. There’s nothing romantic or mysterious about that.”

“Just you and him … alone! I’ll come with you.”

“We have to go on horseback and you can’t ride. Oh Eliza, it’s nothing”

“Well, you’re looking pretty pleased about it.”

“I’m interested in this place … Rosenwald. Perhaps we could both go there for a while.”

She brightened a little at the prospect and I said hastily: “I have to go and see Fraulein Kleber, who lives nearby. The H.D. says she will lend me a riding habit. She has several and she is about my size.”

“Do you mean the H.D. is going to allow this? You going off with him alone?”

“You are making a lot out of nothing. Come on. I’m going to Fraulein Kleber. Do come with me.”