Serpentine (28 page)

Was Kai Sen using his clairvoyance to follow her? But who were the other five monks accompanying him? She knew she shouldn’t linger because she’d give herself away. Kai Sen’s gift in sensing her was too acute and she ran, trying to put distance between them, unable to disperse the memories of their love making as she did so. Finally, not seeing where she was going, she stumbled over a twisted root and crashed to her hands and knees, breathing hard. A branch snapped behind her and she whipped around, feeling dread and hope at once, but there was no one behind her.

Slowly, she rose to her feet, centering herself so she could touch that connection with Zhen Ni.

It was growing stronger, the taste bittersweet in the back of her throat. Skybright tugged the knapsacks closer, squaring her shoulders, and continued on her journey.

Skybright was eating wolfberries, her mouth puckered with the sweet tang of the bright red fruit, when she heard voices in the distance again. She had been considering shifting into serpent form after harvesting enough of the berries, but the monks’ proximity decided it for her. After tying the wolfberries in a handkerchief and stuffing it into her knapsack, she began to undress so she could shift, only to freeze when Kai Sen pushed his way from between the foliage.

“You need to stop doing that,” she croaked, re-clasping the button she had been undoing on her tunic. She hadn’t spoken in days, not since seeing Stone. And while she had hummed softly during her journey, she had been too afraid to draw attention to herself by singing.

“Why did you leave without saying goodbye?” Kai Sen asked, his voice low.

It was such a simple question, one that she had no ready answer for. Skybright had not allowed herself to imagine what it would be like to face Kai Sen again, what she would have to say to him. She stood there, mute, and they stared at each other for a long time, the chatter of the other monks drifting to them.

Finally, she said, “Kai, it was a mistake—”

“Don’t say that.” He tensed, his stance as rigid as an ancient oak.

They had not closed the distance between them, and Skybright refused to take a step forward. “You said yourself that you’d give up everything for me, even your vow of celibacy as a monk if you had taken one. It’s because of what I am. You’re
compelled
to feel this way about me, don’t you see?”

“You believe me to be so weak, so brainless, that I have no choice but to … to love you?” He stalked a tight circle, his frustration palpable.

But she couldn’t hear for those few moments, as the blood had roared into her head when he had said
love
. He finally strode to her, stopping near enough that she could rise on her toes and kiss him. But Skybright held still, red-faced.

“You’re right. I have no choice, Sky. But it isn’t for the reasons that you think. Is it so hard to believe that I could love you simply for you?” He caressed her cheek and his touch was cool against her skin. “For your laugh? And the way you make me laugh? For your bravery and strength and loyalty? For all that I see in your eyes and the way you look back at me? Is that false and contrived?”

He brushed his thumb over her lower lip, leaning in, and it took all of her willpower not to give in to his touch, not to tip her head back and surrender to his kiss. “It meant nothing to me,” she forced out, and he froze, so near she smelled his clean scent—lemon soap mingled with camphor wood. Skybright stepped away from him, glaring at the ground strewn with pine needles. What did it matter if their feelings for each other were true? She saw again her forked tongue darting out and the strong urge to turn into a serpent after making love with Kai Sen. There could be no good outcome if he continued to care for her. She needed to end this, even if she had to hurt him to do so. She lifted her chin and looked him in the eyes, before saying with deliberate coldness, “I could make anyone bed me.”

The color drained from his tanned face, then surged back again, mottling his cheeks. Kai Sen grabbed Skybright by the wrist and pulled her with him. “I won’t let you do this.”

She scrambled to keep up, until they crashed through the trees into a small clearing. The other five monks sat in a loose circle, talking quietly; all turned to them in shock.

“Kai Sen, we thought you were only going for a walk, not collecting lost maidens in the woods,” one of the monks said, and the others broke into nervous laughter.

“Bao Yu, this is Skybright,” Kai Sen said brusquely. “She’s pretty, isn’t she?”

“Pleased to meet you, Skybright.” Bao Yu gave an awkward wave. He appeared to be around twenty years, and was stocky with round eyes set far apart, giving the impression of a surprised calf. Bao Yu kept peering at her face then away, as if embarrassed to look at her fully. Skybright lifted a hand to touch her cheek. Her scar. She must appear like the victim of some tragic accident. “She’s very pretty, Kai Sen,” he replied, then grinned at her shyly. “You’re quite beautiful, mistress.”

“Wonderful! We’re in agreement then.” Kai Sen pushed her forward a little toward Bao Yu. “Would you like to bed her?”

A monk behind her choked on whatever he had been drinking, coughing spastically as Bao Yu’s eyes grew even rounder until he looked like the goldfish Zhen Ni kept in a ceramic bowl in her reception hall. “What?” he managed to force out.

Kai Sen waved a hand up and down beside her, as if showcasing an expensive vase. “Beautiful, right? Do you want to bed her?” he asked again with a wink. “I’ll give you two privacy.”

Skybright’s face was so hot her ears felt on fire. Finally breaking from her stunned silence, she slapped Kai Sen on the shoulder. “What’re you doing?” she sputtered in a low voice.

Kai Sen ignored her.

Bao Yu gathered himself after an uncomfortable pause and said, “I’ve taken a vow of celibacy, Kai Sen. You know that. And stop offending the mistress.”

“You’re saying
no
?” Kai Sen exclaimed in mock surprise. “Skybright, did you hear that? He’s refusing you. Go ahead, work your magic.” He crossed his arms and nodded at her, thrusting his chin out as if in challenge.

“
I
haven’t taken my celibacy vow yet,” a voice piped up from across the clearing.

Kai Sen picked up a small pine cone and threw it. It hit the young monk who had spoken square on his forehead. “No one asked you, Huang.”

“Oww!” Huang rubbed his brow, scowling. He was no more than thirteen years.

Huang was so offended that Skybright burst into laughter, and all six monks gawked at her, as if she were in serpent form dangling from a tree limb. “All right.” She took Kai Sen by the elbow and drew him away from the clearing. “You’ve made your point,” she said when they were hidden in the thickets again. His arm had been stiff beneath her touch the entire time, his stride halting. “I’m sorry for what I said, Kai.”

His body was angled away from her, the cords of his neck taut. “Don’t ever do that again, Sky. Belittle what we have between us. As if it were cheap and something to cast aside.” He made a frustrated noise and met her eyes, and a knot rose in her throat when she saw the devastation there. She
had
hurt him. And yet he would not let her go—would not let
them
go.

“Oh, Kai,” she said. “I just didn’t want to hurt you—”

He let out a harsh laugh. She grasped his fingers in hers and he quieted the moment they touched. “I care for you, but there isn’t a future for us together. Not when I am what I am. I don’t even know my true nature yet—it terrifies me. What if I
do
harm you one day, because I have no control over my demonic side?”

“Why have you dismissed us over what ifs? Over things that you don’t even know will come to pass? Why can’t you live in the moment and accept this?” He drew her closer and wrapped his arms around her waist. “Why can’t you just accept us?

“Because I’m too practical, Kai.”

“No. Not when it comes to me, remember?” He grinned. He had changed into a clean tan-colored tunic since she had last seen him, and she pressed her cheek against his chest, breathing in the subtle scent of camphor wood.

“There are no love stories between serpent demons and monks,” she murmured. “It’s impossible and ridiculous.”

“I’ll write one, then,” he replied, and she laughed, despite herself.

They stood together, holding each other, until Skybright pushed away from him. “Your brother monks must be waiting for you. Why are you traveling in such a small group? It can’t be safe.”

“We’ve been sent on a special mission.” Kai Sen shifted on his feet, suddenly unsettled—something she had never sensed from him before. “We’re closing the breach between the underworld and ours.”

She stared at him in disbelief. “With only six monks? And one barely out of puberty? That’s suicide!”

“Abbot Wu hand selected the group and gave us a map of where the breach is supposed to be. He said we would be blessed—protected—on this mission.”

Should she tell him what Stone had told her? Or let Kai Sen complete the part that was expected of him? How could she even explain what Stone had divulged, when she wasn’t certain if she believed it herself—wasn’t certain if she could even trust the immortal? “But how can you close it?” she asked.

His expression became unreadable, and he raised his head to stare beyond her, into the dense forest. “I was given clear instructions,” he said vaguely.

“Did Han ever tell Abbot Wu about your … confrontation?”

Kai Sen smiled, but his dark brown eyes remained solemn. “He didn’t. I knew he never would—we’re too close. But I’m certain someone else told Abbot Wu what happened. It’s probably why I was sent off with this small team on an impossible mission.”

“Do be careful, Kai. Our world has gone mad.” She wanted to go with him, felt an ominous premonition about this task Abbot Wu had given. Still, Zhen Ni was her primary concern, the one in immediate danger. Skybright shuddered, imagining her mistress being held captive somewhere by that ferocious bull demon.

“I wish I could help you find your mistress. But I’m the leader and cannot abandon the group.” He leaned in and kissed her softly on the mouth. “Promise you’ll keep safe?”

“And you,” she whispered. She had wanted to end things between them, but now the fear that they might never see each other again overwhelmed her with foreboding. Backing away with reluctance, Skybright said, “I must go. Goodbye, Kai Sen.”

“Farewell, Sky.” He held still as a statue, the only movement in his eyes, which followed her progress as she retreated from him. He remained there until she could no longer see him.

Skybright concentrated on the pull she felt toward her mistress. She undressed and shifted after she had left Kai Sen half a league behind her. The earth beneath her serpent coil sang with life, the strength and depth of it so ancient it was beyond her comprehension. But she understood it on a visceral level, and her serpentine senses stretched, just as Zhen Ni would fling her arms out wide after a particularly good nap. Skybright luxuriated in it, in the rich life that the earth sustained and cradled.

She was certain that she was drawing nearer to her mistress as she snaked her way toward the valley of pine trees she had seen days before, enveloped by the pine needles’ crisp, clean scent. They reminded her of Kai Sen, and of the needles she had carefully plucked from his black hair as he slept after their love making. He was being evasive with her about his mission to close the breach to hell and it filled her with unease, as she had never known him not to be completely truthful with her.