SHADES: An Evil Dead MC Story (The Outlaw Series Book 3) (15 page)

“Hmm?”

“I’m scared.” She felt the hand stroking her back go still.

“Of what?”

“I’m afraid this is all going to be taken away again.”

He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I’m not going anywhere, baby.”

“You don’t understand. My whole life has been about letting go. I’ve had to let go of so many people, Shades. Every time I got attached, let someone become important in my life, I’ve had to learn to let them go. It’s hard to let anyone become important after that. But I let you become important. And you tore my heart out. And I’m afraid it’s going to happen again.”

Shades was quiet for a long moment, and then he started talking.

“That summer we met…I’d already almost reached the end of my prospecting. At the time, I couldn’t imagine having gone through everything I’d already gone through only to have that patch yanked away from me.

“I was young, Sky. Young and selfish. Too young to realize that losing you would be the bigger loss. I made a mistake, Skylar. I never should have fucking let you go the first time.

“If I hadn’t, maybe you wouldn’t have had to go through all the pain you did. All I thought about was me. What
I
was going to lose. I didn’t think about you. How it would affect you. I see that now. I was an alpha dog, and you were a sweet innocent shy girl. I thought Cole was right to protect you and run me off.

“And these words are gonna hurt, and that’s sucks, but I gotta say ‘em. You need to hear ‘em. Maybe a part of me knew you’d be a commitment, and it was a commitment I wasn’t ready to make at that time in my life.

“Gotta say, babe. Truth? Back then, part of the appeal of the club was the women. I wasn’t ready for an ol’ lady or locking myself down like that to one woman. You deserved better. Even then, I knew that. I knew if I was sweet about it, you’d convince me to stay, so I was a dick. It was the only way I could run you off. I had to turn it around and make it your fault. It never was, Sky. It was never you. I was angry with myself, and I took it out on you. I convinced myself you were trying to ruin everything I’d worked so hard for. You weren’t. You never would have. You would have stayed and taken any shit I shoveled your way.”

Skylar took in his words. It hurt to hear them, but he was right, she needed to hear them. They had to talk this all out if they were going to come out on the other side. And there were things she’d needed to get out, too. “What you did, it broke me. I felt worthless. Like I didn’t deserve to be loved.” A tear slid down her cheek and dropped to his chest.

“You’re not worthless, you know it deep inside. You don’t dress like you think nothing of yourself, you don’t do drugs. You never did. Sky, you were always meant for better. It’s in you. You can’t be broken. Please don’t tell me you’re broken.”

“What does it matter? Things never worked out. You. Letty. My life.”

He rose up over her, his hand lifting to her face, his thumb brushing the wetness from her cheek.

“All that’s fuckin’ over, Sky. You hear me? It’s long fucking done.”

CHAPTER TEN

Skylar woke, her hand sliding across the sheets. Empty. Lifting up from her stomach, she looked toward the open French doors to see Shades leaning against the frame, his eyes on the horizon as dawn was breaking. He was bare chested, his jeans pulled on, but left undone, hanging loose on his hips, that sexy V showing. At her movement he turned his head to look at her, a grin pulling at his mouth.

“Mornin’, babe.”

She returned his smile. “Morning.”

“Great view.”

“I know, you can see for miles from that window.”

“Not talkin’ about the window,” he corrected with a lazy grin, letting his eyes sweep over her naked back down to where the sheet lie draped low across her ass.

She smiled. “Come back to bed.”

She watched as he pushed off the doorframe and sauntered toward her, his shoulders rolling as he moved, and her eyes skated over his muscular arms and chest and cut abs. He stopped at the end of the bed, leaning against one of the four posters.

She looked back at him over her shoulder, a coquettish smile on her face.

“Roll over, babe.”

She took in the look in his eyes. It was hungry, his eyes hooded, dilated. She moved to do as he bid, rolling and pressing back against the pillows, one foot coming up to run seductively, temptingly back and forth over the sheet, her knee bent, her hip out.

His eyes ran over her.

“Put your hands over your head. Grab the headboard.”

She did as he asked, her hands closing over the polished wooden spindles. She watched him watch her, and as he continued to stand there, his eyes sweeping over her, she grew impatient for his touch. She couldn’t stop herself from writhing on the sheets, beckoning him with her body.

“Shades, please.”

“You want something, pretty girl?”

“You know I do.”

“What do you want?”

“You.”

He shook his head. “Uh-uh. More specific. Ask for it.”

“I want you to climb on this bed, climb on top of me.”

“And?”

“I want to feel your weight on me. Feel your hands on me, sliding over my skin.”

His hand reached inside his jeans and pulled his cock out. He stroked it and she watched, fascinated.

“Keep goin’,” he ordered.

“I want to touch you like that. I want to put my hands on you, my mouth on you. Please, Shades.”

“I like hearing you talk like that. Sexy as fuck, babe.” His eyes skimmed over her body. “Like watchin’ you writhe like that, too. Fuck, yeah.” His hand kept stroking slow and sure.

Her chest rose and fell. She loved foreplay, but this was torture. She let go of the spindle with one hand and ran it down her body to between her legs.

“That’s mine. You don’t touch it unless I say you can.”

She pouted.

“Put your hand back on the headboard, babe.”

“Shades,” she pleaded.

“Is that mine or not?” he pressed.

“It’s yours.”

His brow lifted, waiting for her to comply.

She huffed out a breath, but returned her hand to the headboard.

He made a tsk-tsk sound. “That’ll cost you, babe.”

“Cost me what? Don’t you want me, Shades?” She writhed again and watched as his control practically snapped in front of her eyes. He kicked his jeans off and crawled up between her legs. His mouth trailed soft kissed up the inside of her thigh, and she felt the soft brush of his beard. He had a hand planted in the bed on either side of her hips. She ran her eyes up his muscled forearms to his biceps to his strong shoulders. His head came down to press a kiss to her smooth belly, again his soft beard brushing erotically against her skin. She sucked in a breath, her belly jerking, and his eyes lifted to hers. His mouth was still just an inch off her skin. She watched a smile pull at the corners.

“Still ticklish, I see.”

“I want to touch you,” she half begged, her hands still on the spindles.

“Looked more like you wanted to touch
you
.” He grinned.

“Maybe I was just trying to stir you up.”

“You tryin’ to rattle my cage? You got me.” He dipped his head and gave her another brush of his lips. Then he rose up. “Still gonna cost you, baby.”

He slid down, and his mouth found her. Just barely a touch at first, just enough to have her writhing on the bed as he kept at her. One big warm palm came down on her belly holding her down, holding her still while he continued to work her with his mouth and his tongue. Her thighs were pinned wide under his biceps, holding her just where he wanted her, open to him as he tortured her with his mouth until she didn’t think she could take anymore. Then he added his hand, his thumb brushing over her, making her back arch under him.

“Yes. Yes, more.”

“Gonna make you squirm and beg for it now, pretty girl.”

And true to his word, he kept at her for a long time until she couldn’t take anymore.

“Please, Shades. Please.”

And then he gave it to her, and her head fell back, her neck arching and she came all over him.

Only then did he slide up over her, moving so quickly she gasped as his strong chest came down on top of her, and he thrust inside her, hard, deep and fast.

She rode her orgasm out on his cock as he thrust over and over.

His hips pumping, he rose up on his arms, his head dropping, and his eyes going to where they were joined. He watched himself slide in and out of her, watched her take him. And she watched him watch, and it was erotic as hell.

“Fuck yeah,” he growled. “Love watchin’ you take me.” One hand dropped from the bed to grab her leg and pull it up high, pushing back into the bed, opening her wider to him. He grunted as he pounded into her roughly. “You like it like this?”

“God, yes. Don’t stop. Don’t stop.”

His mouth came down on her breast and latched onto her nipple. He tugged hard and she arched under him. Yes. Oh God, yes. He rolled his hips and ground himself against her with each thrust, and he soon had her climbing toward another orgasm.

“Oh, Shades.”

“That’s it, Sky. Find it. Let go.” His breathing sawed in and out of him, his chest slick with sweat as he pumped and thrust and worked her.

A minute later, she was shuddering under him as another orgasm rolled over her. She let out a soft low moan as it washed over her.

He pumped hard and then he glided once, twice and then he went solid above her, and she watched as it broke across his face, and his release shattered through him, his body shivering with the aftershocks.

He sank down onto her, and her arms wrapped around him tight, her hands stroking his back, her fingers gliding into the hair at his nape. She pressed soft kisses along his jaw, his throat, his ear.

It took a few moments for him to rouse enough to raise his head and look down at her. His hand came up to brush the hair back from her forehead, and then his head dropped down, his mouth touching hers in a soft kiss.

“Hmm. Missed that,” he groaned.

“Fucking?” she asked with a smile.

“You touching me like that. Soft kisses, hands gliding on me.”

“Oh,” she breathed, letting the sweetness of his words melt through her.

“And the fucking, too.” He grinned.

She giggled. “Of course, the fucking, too.” She watched the crinkles at the corners of his eyes as he laughed, and her hand stroked over his back again.

“I have to go into the shop today.”

His change in topic threw her, and her smile faded. “Oh. Okay.”

“I want you to come with me.”

She frowned, not understanding.

“Come with me to the shop. I have to go, and I want you near me.” He grabbed her hand and brought it to his mouth, pressing a kiss to her palm. “I just found you again. I don’t want to be away from you today.”

“I have a better idea. Stay here in bed with me all day.”

He grinned, his eyes sweeping down over her breasts. “As tempting as that sounds, I got work to do today. Promised a guy his car would be ready by one.”

“And what would I do while you’re working on a car?” she asked, stalling, not sure she wanted to go back to his body shop when all she could think of was the last time she was there and the awful memories of that day.

“Sit your pretty ass in a chair and watch me work.” He grinned.

Her hand fiddled with the hair at his nape. “Shades, that place kind of has bad memories for me.”

He studied her, his eyes moving from her eyes to his hand stroking through her hair. Then they returned to hers. “Oh, but sweetheart, there are a lot of good memories there, too.”

Her hand came to his jaw, cupping his cheek and her thumb slid over his lips, and she let those good memories float through her mind. She watched his mouth open and capture her thumb. Her eyes lifted, connecting with his. They were filled with warmth and heat.

“Okay,” she breathed.

He released her thumb and grinned, repeating her word back at her. “Okay.”

An hour later, after a taking a shower together and getting dressed, they rode toward his shop on his bike. Shades felt Skylar tuck in behind him, her breasts pressed against his back. It felt right, natural, like it was where she’d always belonged. On the back of his bike, her arms wrapped around him.

Before they’d left her place, while she was getting ready, he’d stepped out on her balcony and called his sister and begged her to make a quick run to his shop to change his sheets. He owed her big time now. Oil change, tune up and a new paint job.

Damned if she didn’t drive a hard bargain, but she’d finally given in, like he knew she would. And he’d made her promise to get the good shit. 600 thread count or Egyptian cotton or whatever it was chicks liked.

She’d laughed at him, but she’d done as he’d bid.

When they’d gotten to his shop, he’d worked faster than usual and had the car ready by eleven. After a call, the car was picked up early.

Now he watched through the glass door as the car pulled off the lot, and then he reached up and flipped the open sign over to the closed side.

Then he turned to her.

****

Skylar watched a grin form on his face. A grin she knew so well. She watched him move toward her with purpose, and then he was taking her hand and leading her toward the stairs.

The stairs to the loft.

The loft where his bed was.

She pulled back, digging in her heels.

That had him stopping and turning to look back at her.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

She shook her head, her eyes lifting to the loft. “No, Shades. I can’t. Not here.”

He took both her hands in his, and his eyes searched her face. “Sweetheart, we had one bad hour there. And a lot of good ones. A lot. The bad? It’s over. It’s done. And I’m as sorry as I can be, and I think I told you that. But now I need you to let it go. ‘Cause, babe, you pull that out and throw it up between us over and over, and we
are
never
gonna get past it.”

Shades was direct, he always had been. It’s one of the things she’d loved about him.

Still.

“Shades, I can’t,” she whispered, her eyes again going to the loft.

“Do you forgive me?”

“Shades—”

“Do. You. Forgive. Me?”

She nodded.

“Say it.”

He waited.

“Say it, Sky. I need to hear you say it. Out loud.”

“I forgive you, Shades.”

“Part of forgivin’ me, Sky, is lettin’ this shit go. You gonna let this shit go?”

She studied him, knowing he was right, but still, not sure she was capable of it. Then again, if she didn’t at least try to get past it, they’d never have a start—a real start—at a second chance. “I’ll try. That’s all I can give you.”

“I can work with that.” He kissed her softly on the lips. Then he took her hand and led her upstairs.