SHADES: An Evil Dead MC Story (The Outlaw Series Book 3) (11 page)

Shades drained his cup, his eyes never leaving the couple across the yard.

Butcher must have asked Skylar to give them some privacy, because Shades saw him jerk his chin toward the food tent. Crash dipped his head to her ear, whispered something, and then she stood and walked off.

Shades’ eyes tracked her as she walked up to one of the food tables and began chatting with Birdie and Cookie, two ol’ ladies that were in their mid-forties. He saw the two women smile and greet her warmly, making her feel welcome, like they did with all out of town brothers and their ol’ ladies.

From clear across the lot he could see the anything-but-welcoming glances that the younger women—Brandy, Desiree and Darla—were giving her. Shades knew enough about women to know the look of them when they were sizing up their competition.

****

Skylar had moved to the food tent when Butcher had indicated he wanted to talk with the men alone. Crash had told her to stay close and within his sight before he’d squeezed her hand and let her go. She’d greeted the two older women, Birdie and Cookie, remembering them from the old days. But now she looked across the tables at the other three women standing nearby. They were younger and new. They’d probably still been in junior high when she’d used to come up to the club. The looks they were giving her told her they were sizing her up as competition. Even though everyone knew she’d ridden in with Crash.

She took a drink of her beer and finished it off.

Birdie noticed and smiled. “If you’re headed over for another one, doll, could you bring me back one?”

“Sure, Birdie.” Skylar smiled at her and headed over to the keg with her empty red cup.

There were a couple full-patched members standing around it. Two of the big men, who had their backs to her, moved off. When they stepped out of the way she stopped short seeing Shades standing with the nozzle in his hand filling his own cup. His eyes lifted to hers, and they just looked at each other as his cup slowly filled.

Skylar broke eye contact, and to cover her nervousness she reached over to the stack of red plastic cups and pulled one off the top for Birdie. About that time, Shades finished filling his own cup and held the nozzle aloft over her cup. With a nod from her, he began filling it.

“You a two-fisted drinker these days?” he asked, a quirk of a grin pulling at his mouth.

She gave him an answering timid smile. “One’s for Birdie.”

His eyes slid past her toward the food tent, and then she watched his eyes move over to the blue canopy where Crash was sitting. She turned and glanced back to see Crash’s eyes on them. He gave her a chin lift.

Both her and Shades turned back to look at each other simultaneously, and then his eyes dropped to the cup as the beer reached the top. He let off on the lever, and she held the other cup out. He began filling it.

The silence between them was awkward. It felt so wrong to be this close to him and not be in each other’s arms. There were so many things she wanted to tell him. Explain. And yet this awful silence that gripped them like a vise said so much more.

She sucked her lips into her mouth almost as if she was trying to hold back the words that wanted to pour out of her. Words she could never say. Not here. Not with half the club watching.

He finished filling her second cup and hung the nozzle back on the tapper. “There you go.”

She looked down at the two cups and murmured a thank you.

He took a sip of his beer, his eyes meeting hers over the rim. And then with a glance back at Crash, he turned without a word and walked off.

****

Shades could feel her eyes on him as he walked away. He headed toward the gate where his prospect was now happily munching on a hot dog and chatting up the lovely Ashley.

Walking up quietly, with the prospect’s back toward him, Shades had the element of surprise on his side. He pounded the back of his fist into 12Gauge’s chest and growled, “You lettin’ this little girl distract you from your duties, Prospect?” At the same time 12Gauge spun around to look at him, Shades winked at the girl.

“No, Sir.” 12Gauge straighten up, coming instantly alert.

Shades hooked an arm around Ashley’s neck and pulled her close, her back to his front. His face moved to her neck, his nose rubbing along her skin, inhaling her perfume. “She smells fucking amazing, Prospect. That could be real distracting.”

At the devastated look on 12Gauge’s face, Shades smiled.

“I wouldn’t let my brothers down like that,” 12Gauge vowed.

Shades, with one arm still around the girl, grabbed a fistful of 12Gauge’s leather cut and got in his face. “Brothers? You don’t have any brothers. Nobody here is your fucking brother until you’ve got that patch on your back, Prospect! You got that?”

“Sorry, man. Slip of the tongue. I swear.” He swallowed, his eyes going to the girl, as he promised, “I won’t let her distract me, Shades.”

Shades made a disbelieving smirk and shoved him back, releasing him. “Not sure I’m believin’ that, Prospect. No, I think I best take this little temptation away. Wouldn’t want you to screw up a second time today. You better not make me sorry I sponsored you, Prospect.”

12Gauge swallowed and gave him a nod.

Shades led Ashley back to the picnic table he’d been sitting at. As he walked, he pulled her close, his eyes going over her head to find Skylar. She watched him from her place back at the food table with Birdie and the girls.

****

Skylar tried to make small talk with Birdie and Cookie for a while, but her heart wasn’t in it. The sun was setting when she finally noticed Butcher, Slick and Boot get up and move off toward the clubhouse. Crash stood, but didn’t follow them. She moved toward him, coming to a stop in front of him.

He looked down at her. “You get some food yet, squirt?”

She shook her head, looking up at him solemnly. “I was waiting for you. Aren’t you hungry?”

“Not really. Maybe later.”

“Everything okay?”

He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her to him, kissing her forehead. “I’m fine. You should eat.”

“I’m not really hungry either.”

“We’re a pair, aren’t we?”

She looked up at him sadly, and he pulled her against his chest, his chin coming down on the top of her head. She wrapped her arms around him, knowing they’d get past this sadness that consumed them. Time would eventually heal them.

Skylar’s face was turned to the side and straight in front of her, across the compound, Shades stared back at her. He sat on the top of the picnic table. The pretty blonde she’d seen him with earlier sitting between his legs on the bench below him. His hand was idly running through her hair, but his eyes remained on Skylar.

Crash bent his head to her ear. “You had enough?”

She nodded against his chest, her arms tight around him.

“Okay, baby girl. We’ll leave.”

She turned her head to look up at him. “You sure?”

“I made my appearance. Talked with who I needed to talk to. Let’s get out of here.” And then he was taking her by the hand and walking her through the crowd toward his bike.

****

Later that night, Shades lie in his bed in the apartment above his auto body shop. He stared at the ceiling and smoked a cigarette, his thoughts once again consumed by Skylar. He looked over at the clock.

3am.

He lie there. Wide awake. Wondering where Skylar was. In a bed somewhere with Crash no doubt, his arms wrapped around her sweet body. Why did he let these thoughts torture him? Twisting, he angrily jabbed out his cigarette on the rough wood floor, and then dropped the butt into an old beer can.

He leaned back, his arms folded behind his head and continued to study the ceiling. Fucking the blonde earlier tonight hadn’t even worked Skylar out of his head. He knew better than to think it would. It never had before.

Skylar.

Would he ever be free of this longing?

Memories floated through his head of that summer they’d had together.

He went back in his mind to the place where it all went off track. The night he got the call-out that changed everything between them. When he’d still been a prospect, and she’d still believed in him…

Ten years ago—

Shades let off on the throttle and coasted into the darkened alley. At 2am, it was empty.

He parked next to the only other bike there and climbed off. Dismounting, he pulled his helmet off and hung it over the handlebar.

The burning tip of a cigarette flared to life from the dark shadows against the brick wall, and then went sailing into the distance. A second later, a shadowy figure separated itself from the wall and stepped out into the dim starlight.

Cole.

The man who had called him out tonight.

He’d gotten used to these middle of the night call-outs, but they still sucked, especially when he’d left Skylar in his bed, her skin all warm and soft. It made it hard for a man to get out of bed when that was what he was leaving behind.

“Cole.” Shades greeted the man, and the hairs on the back of his neck immediately went up when Cole didn’t return his greeting, but instead pulled a black glove on as he stared Shades down. “What’s up?”

“You and me got some business.”

Shades’ eyes darted down the alley, wondering just what the fuck was about to go down. “What business is that?”

Cole approached him, flexing his gloved hand, opened, closed. Shades resisted the urge to take a step back, and instead held his ground. A moment later he was blindsided by a powerful right hook to the head. He stumbled back a step, but stayed on his feet as pain exploded in his jaw. He tried to shake the stars from his vision as he wondered what new test this was. The back of his hand came up to wipe the blood that was trailing down from his split lip. “What the fuck, Cole?”

Another fist connected with his left cheek. And then Cole grabbed two fistfuls of his cut and drove him backwards until he slammed into the side of a dumpster. Shades started to shove Cole back, but one word from the man stopped him.

“Skylar!” It came out in a snarl.

Shades eyes slid closed as he slumped back against the metal he was pinned to by one angry, pissed-off biker. “Shit.”

Cole released him with a violent shove. “That prospect cut mean anything to you?”

Shades straightened. “You know it does.”

“You were warned to stay away from her!”

Shades nodded, offering no excuse.

“You want that patch, you cut her loose. You hear me? You. Cut. Her. Loose.”

“It’s not what you think. She means something to me.”

“I don’t give a fuck, Prospect. I’m still your goddamned sponsor. I can rip that fucking prospect patch off your back. At
my
fucking discretion.”

“Cole, let me explain, for Christ sake.”

“Fuck your bullshit explanations. Only two ways this is gonna go. You want that center patch, you cut her loose. You don’t, you’ll never fucking get my vote. You hear me?”

Shades spit a mouthful of blood on the ground and growled, “I hear you.”

Present day—

Shades lie in his bed, staring at the ceiling and wondering if he could go back now, would he have made a different decision that night. Would he have had the guts to rip his cut off and toss it at his sponsor’s feet? Would she have been his choice?

Cole had continued the beating that night, making sure his point was made. Shades hadn’t even fought back, knowing he deserved it for breaking the man’s trust. For lying to him. Hell, when Cole was done, Shades knew he couldn’t go home. There was no way in hell he’d be able to hide his battered face from Skylar. So he’d texted her that he had business taking him out of town and to get her own ride home. He’d avoided her all that week, partially to give his face time to heal and partially to put off doing what he knew he had to do. Break up with her. And break her fucking heart in the process.

An empty ache cut through him, and he swore to God, he’d never felt so alone. And the shit of it was, she was so close again, after all these years. So close and yet he knew, she was farther away than ever. In the arms of a goddamned
brother
.

Just within his grasp, and never to be in his grasp again.

Goddamn, it was like a fist squeezing his heart, squeezing the life out of him.

And he couldn’t do shit about it.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Skylar wandered out onto the porch. The last few pink slashes of sunset were fading from the sky. She found Crash sitting on the porch steps. He turned and glanced over his shoulder at her a moment before turning his quiet gaze back to the horizon. He looked so despondent and lonely sitting there.

It had been several days since the party at the clubhouse, and she could sense a restlessness about him, like he was ready to move on. Skylar moved to sit on the step above him, and her arms encircled his neck from behind, her face close to his. “You okay?”

He responded softly, “Sure. Why?”

“You just seem sad.”

“Do I?”

“Are you missing California?”

He shrugged, his eyes still on the horizon. Fireflies began to make their appearance and crickets were the only sound in the quiet peacefulness. “I thought staying here for a while would help. I just felt I needed to be close to them somehow. Like I couldn’t just stick them in the ground and leave. But, there’s just so many memories here. Everywhere I go, you know?”

She nodded, resting her chin on his shoulder. “I know. There are a million memories of Letty and I everywhere, too.”

He reached up and ran his palm over one of her forearms that were looped around his neck. “You two were inseparable.”

She smiled. “I suppose.” They were quiet for a few minutes, each staring out over the pasture and hills in the distance. Remembering. Finally she asked what she’d been wondering, what she’d had a feeling about. “Are you thinking of going back?”

He was quiet a moment and then answered softly with a squeeze to her forearm. “Yeah.”

She hugged his neck. “I’ll miss you.”

He grinned, his head turning to the side to kiss her cheek. “I’ll miss you, too, squirt. You gonna be okay?”

“I’ll be fine. We both will.” She gave him a squeeze.

“Yeah, I hope so.”

“There’s a woman, isn’t there?” she asked with a sly grin.

His smile faded, and he looked away.

“What happened?”

He pulled her arms free and stood, pacing a couple of steps off the stairs.

“Crash?”

“There was.”

“Was?”

“It’s over now.”

“Tell me about her.”

He shrugged and let out a huff of laughter. “I wouldn’t know where to start.”

“Hey,” she caught his attention and dipped her head, grinning at him. “The beginning is usually a good place.”

He laughed with a shake of his head. “It’s complicated. We didn’t even get along at first.”

“But then you did?”

“Yeah. Then we did. Big time.”

“Big time, huh?” She grinned. “Sounds interesting.” When he didn’t elaborate, she prodded, “So? What happened? What went wrong?”

Crash slid his hands in his hip pockets and took in a deep breath. “I tried to protect her. Did something I shouldn’t have. She shut me out.”

Skylar looked out over the hills. “Women are complicated.”

He let out a huff. “No shit.”

She grinned. “Sometimes when what we want most is right in front of us…”

“Yeah?” She had his attention now.

“We get scared and push it away.”

“Why? Why do women do that?”

She shrugged. “We sabotage ourselves, I guess.”

Crash folded his arms, leaned up against the post at the foot of the stair rail and shook his head. “Women.”

“But then we usually rethink it and wish we could take it all back.”

“I don’t want someone who has to rethink being with me.”

She nodded. “Guys are no easier to understand.”

“Bullshit. Guys are simple. We want what we want and make no bones about what that is.”

“Until you don’t want it anymore.”

That must have sent up red flags because he gave her a questioning look. “Sounds like you got your own tale to tell. So, spill. Who was he?”

She shook her head.

“Come on, I shared. Now it’s your turn.”

“It was a long time ago.”

“When?”

“Before you left for California.”

He frowned. “Babe, you were what, eighteen?”

She nodded.

“Someone you went to school with?”

She shook her head. “No. He was older.”

“How much older?” He straightened, the frown still there, but now more intense.

“He was twenty-three.” She watched his head tilt to the side, his eyes remaining locked with hers, and she could see the wheels turning.

“You were at the clubhouse a lot that summer.” When she couldn’t keep eye contact with him, he moved to stand over her. “Do I know him? Was it a brother?”

She kept her eyes averted and didn’t reply.

“Skylar, answer me.”

“You know him. But he wasn’t a brother. Not then.”

He sucked in a breath. “But he is now.”

She nodded. “Yes.” And then the pieces must have clicked into place because he snarled his name.

“Shades.”

She looked up at him then. “What gave it away?”

“It explains why he’s been drilling me with looks like he has every time I see him. Every time he sees us together.”

“I…hadn’t noticed.”

“Bullshit.” He called her on it. “I’ve seen the looks pass between you. I just hadn’t put it together till now.”

“He looks at me like he hates me, and I suppose he does. But he was the one that broke it off.”

“He was a prospect back then. He should have stayed clear of you. And you, babe, should have stayed clear of him.”

“He knew what he was risking—sneaking around with me. We both did. I guess in the end, it was too much of a risk for him. I guess I wasn’t worth it.”

“Skylar, don’t say that. You’re worth it, and don’t you ever let a guy make you think you’re not. You hear me?”

She looked up at him, tears glistening in her eyes and whispered, “I hear you.”

“Babe, come here.”

She stood up and was in his arms before he finished the sentence. Having his arms around her felt so good. She was filled with such emptiness. She felt like she had no one. No one in the world. No parents, no family, no man, no job and now no Letty or Mama Rose. What did she have left?

And now Crash was leaving, too. She felt her heart wrench.

“I’ll miss you so much,” she choked out. “I know it’s selfish, but I don’t want you to go.” She felt him press his face to the top of her head, and he spoke softly into her hair.

“I know, squirt, but I can’t stay.”

Just hearing those words, had all those old feelings of being abandoned sifting through her.

“Hey?” He pulled back, taking her face in his hands and brushing her hair back from her face. “You know it’s not me you want or need. It’s Shades.”

She shook her head in his hands. “That’s over.”

“I don’t know what happened back then, maybe he came to his senses and realized you were way out of his league or that he was no good for you. But I know one thing. Whatever was between you, it’s
not
over. Not for him. Not by a long shot. Not judging by the way he looks at you.”

“It doesn’t matter now.” She pushed out of his arms. “I’m tired. I’m going up to bed.”

“Skylar…”

“I’ll see you in the morning.” She dashed up the steps, determined to not let him see the tears that were spilling down her cheeks.

****

Crash watched her disappear inside, and then he pulled his phone out of his pocket and called Cole.

“Hey, Brother. How are you?” Cole’s voice came on the line, and Crash realized he’d obviously read the caller ID.

“Okay, but I think I’m ready to head back out there.”

“That’s good to hear. You’ve been missed around here.”

“I’ll book a flight tomorrow.”

“Okay. Let me know, and we’ll pick you up at the airport. How’s it been at the old chapter?”

“All right. Strange. Busy.”

“Sounds like some stories for when you get back.”

“Yeah. Hey, Cole?”

“Yeah, Brother?”

“You know anything about Skylar hooking up with Shades before we left for California years ago?” Crash could hear Cole take a deep breath before he answered.

“Yeah. I knew about that. Nipped it in the bud, too.”

“What do you mean?”

“I saw them together. Cornered Shades on it later and beat the shit out of him. Told him he needed to end it or I’d make sure he was never voted in. He could kiss that patch he wanted so badly goodbye.”

“So that’s why he broke it off with her.”

“Why?”

“He’s been giving me looks.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like he wants to knock my teeth in.” Crash could hear Cole laugh.

“Probably because when we were there for Bulldog’s funeral, I led him to believe that Skylar’s your ol’ lady.”

“You did
what?
”

Cole chuckled. “You could do worse.”

“Why the hell would you do that?”

“Remember when we brought Skylar and Letty to the clubhouse?”

“Yeah.”

“He was confronting her, had her up against the wall when I walked up. Anyway, he’d seen you two ride in together, and he just assumed you were together. I may have led him to believe that assumption was correct.”

“Fuck. Think it might have occurred to you to let me in on this little scheme of yours?”

“He jumps your ass, I’m sure you can hold your own.” Cole laughed.

“Thanks for your vote of confidence, bro.”

Cole chuckled. “Call me tomorrow.”

“Right.” Crash disconnected and went inside. He strode up the stairs and straight to Skylar’s room. Tapping lightly on the door, he called. “You up?”

“Come in,” came her soft reply.

Swinging the door open, he saw she was sitting up in bed and reaching to switch the bedside lamp on.

“Sorry, were you asleep already?”

“No. Not yet. What is it?”

“I’m heading back. Tomorrow, if I can get a flight.”

She looked down at her lap, plucking at the quilt. “Oh. That soon?”

“Yeah, babe. It’s time.” He moved toward the four-poster bed. He slid his palm high on the carved poster, his thumb brushing along it, his eyes on his hand. “I…ah…just talked with Cole. Found something out, and I wanted you to know.”

“What is it?”

He leaned against the bedpost and met her eyes. The confusion on her face was easy to read, so he just came right out with it. “It was Cole that forced Shades to break it off with you.” He watched her reaction. Her mouth parted, and her brows drew together.

“What?” she asked softly. “Why would he care?”

Crash shrugged. “You know we’ve both treated you like a little sister. Him especially. Guess he thought he was looking out for you.”

“Forced him how?”

“Beat the shit out of him, for one.”

“For one?”

“Threatened to make sure he’d never get his patch. I’m sure that was the deciding factor.”

“So the patch was more important to him than I was.”

“Skylar, you have to understand, guys like us, that patch means everything. It’s who we are. But that doesn’t mean he didn’t care about you.”

“Right.”

“Look, that’s water under the bridge now. He’s a full-patched member. Nobody can say shit about who he wants to make his ol’ lady. That’s not stopping either of you anymore.”

“I don’t think it’s that simple, Crash. He looks at me like he hates me, now.”

Crash looked down, rubbing his hand down his thigh. “Yeah, about that…”

“What?”

“Cole led him to believe you were my ol’ lady. At Bulldog’s funeral, when we showed up together. Shades assumed you were with me. Cole, apparently reinforced that assumption.” Her eyes looked everywhere but at him, almost as if she were embarrassed. When she stayed quiet, he crossed his arms and added, “You knew?”

“I…he…”

“Spill.”

“Shades was talking to me, and Cole walked up and told me to get back to my ol’ man.” She looked up at him guiltily. “I knew he only said it to make Shades back off. And he did. Instantly.”

Crash’s brows rose, prompting her to continue. “And?”

“And, I’m sure seeing us together since then has underlined it.” Skylar looked up at him. “Not that I’m not honored to be your
pretend
ol’ lady, but I don’t think that’s the only reason he hates me.” She shrugged. “It doesn’t matter now, anyway.”

“Babe, that’s a fuckin’ flat-out lie. It’s obvious there’s still some unresolved shit there. If there wasn’t, he wouldn’t look at me like he wants to put his fist through my face.”