SHADES: An Evil Dead MC Story (The Outlaw Series Book 3) (13 page)

“See you’re not gonna believe a word I fuckin’ say,” he ground out. “Guess I’m gonna have to show you.”

Before she knew what he was about to do, she was up and over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. She shrieked, “Shades! Put me down.” He moved out of the kitchen and up the big staircase. When he got to the top, he only hesitated a moment before setting her down on her feet.

“Which room?” he demanded. His chest was heaving, and the look in his eyes told her he was a man determined to get his way.

Backing up a step, she whirled and dashed into the master suite, slamming the door in his face and quickly throwing the lock before he could react. A moment later, his voice was on the other side.

“Open the door, Sky.”

She stared at the closed door, the words of his apology replaying in her mind.
He was sorry. He knew he’d fucked up. He’d thought of her every day. He’d gone back for her
. Was it true? Was any of it true? Oh, God, he was going to break her. Her defenses kicked in.

“Go to hell.”

“Baby, don’t be like this. Let me in.”

“Get out.”

“That’s not gonna happen. Come on, sweetheart, we have a lot of shit to talk about. I get that. I know you’ve got a reason to hate me, but I never wanted to hurt you. I never wanted to let you go.”

Skylar closed her eyes, her forehead pressing against the door as he said the words she’d longed to hear once upon a time. A lifetime ago.

“Why are you here?” she whispered through the door.

She heard his voice close, as if he was bracing on his hands, leaning his face to the door. “Because I had no choice. Because I can’t stay away. Because this confrontation was a done deal the moment I laid eyes on you again. You signed that deal the minute you rode back through the clubhouse gate, babe.”

“I didn’t come looking for you.” She laid her palm on the wood.

“Maybe not. But now I’ve come looking for you.”

“Shades, please, just go.”

“Not happening, sweetheart, so open the door.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Shades, what we had is done. You need to let go of the past.”

“Have
you
let it go?” When she didn’t reply, he continued, not giving up. “Sky, I’m not leaving until we work some shit out.”

“There’s nothing to work out.” She pushed away from the door.

“The hell there’s not,” he growled.

“Go away, Shades. I’m not interested. Nothing about you interests me anymore. Get that through your head. I don’t want you.”

“Skylar, you want to play hard to get, I’m up for it, but don’t go cutting my balls off sayin’ shit like that.”

“I’m not hard to get. I’m impossible to get.”

“You’re teasing me, baby. Wild crazy foreplay, that’s all this is. You know it, and I know it.”

“You’re insane.”

“You
do
drive me crazy, woman, I’ll give you that. Now be a good girl, and open the door.”

She didn’t reply.

“Sweetheart, do I need to point out that at any time I want I could bust this door down?”

“Go away, Shades.
Please
.”

“Done playin’ with you, babe. Nothing and no one is keepin’ you from me. Not this time. No brother and no goddamn locked door. You need to get that through your head and get it right fucking
now
.” A moment later his deep, rough voice threatened, “I gotta break down this door, I will, Sky. Don’t for a minute think I won’t.”

She blew out a breath. She didn’t doubt him. She knew he wouldn’t hesitate to do what he just threatened, and she couldn’t allow him to damage the place. The man who’d been kind enough to allow her to stay here didn’t deserve that. And she couldn’t call the police. Not on a member of the Evil Dead. She knew better than that. So, that left her no choice but to let him in. Turning, she took a deep breath and threw the lock. Before she could even turn the knob, he was pushing his way in and just as quickly slamming it shut behind him.

Taking a step back, her eyes went to his face, studying his expression. It was dark. His head was tipped down, his eyes boring into her from under his brows. There was something about that look that had her backing up until she reached out behind her and found the bed post with her hand. Its solid carved wood smooth beneath her palm. A moment later, her back was pressed to it.

“Say what you need to say, and then please go.” Her voice quavered, but she managed to lift her chin.

He stalked across the room toward her, slowly, intently. Saying nothing until he was standing in front of her, so close her rapidly rising and falling chest was just inches from brushing against him.

His hand came up and brushed a strand of her hair back and he breathed, “You were always beautiful, but damned if you aren’t even more beautiful now.”

Her breath left her, his words having the same effect on her they’d always had. She watched as his eyes swept over her, her body, her hair, her lips, before returning to her eyes.

“I should have never let you go, baby.” His fingers sifted through her hair. “Biggest mistake of my life.”

“But you did.”

“I’m sorry, Skylar. For all of it.”

She turned her head and tried to look away, but his hand came to her cheek and brought her eyes back to him.

“You don’t believe me.”

She shook her head slightly and watched his jaw tighten.

“I know I deserve that. That and more.”

“Is that…is that all you came to say?” she whispered, her eyes dropping.

“No.”

Her eyes came back to his, waiting for more. Whatever his more would be.

“I need to tell you about why I let you go. Why I ran you off.”

It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him she already knew, but something inside her stopped her. She wanted to see what he would say, if it would match the story Crash had told her.

“So tell me.”

“Do you remember that night we were in bed and I got that last call-out?”

She nodded. They’d been happy then, back when she’d foolishly been so sure of his love. Before it all went to hell.

“It was Cole. When I got to the meeting place, he was waiting for me. Told me he knew all about us. Laid it all out for me. I break it off with you or I could kiss my patch goodbye.”

She looked away, swallowing, her throat suddenly tight. She already knew he’d chosen that patch over her, but it still hurt to hear the words come out of his mouth.

“Sky.”

She didn’t respond.

“Look at me, please, baby.”

Taking in a deep breath, she lifted her eyes to his.

“Ain’t tellin’ you this shit to hurt you. I just want you to know the truth. You deserve to hear the truth.”

“So tell me.”

“He thought I was just playing with you.”

The words tore through her, and her eyes shifted away.

“I tried to tell him it wasn’t like that. That you meant something to me. That what we had was real.”

At that, her eyes came back to his. His searched hers, filled with regret and maybe looking for understanding.

“He didn’t buy it or if he did, he didn’t care. Didn’t give a damn what I said. There was only one outcome that he was going to settle for, and that was him ending us.”

“
You
ended us, Shades. Not him.”

She watched his jaw clench, and his head dropped. Then it came back up. “Yeah. I ended us.”

She looked away again. “Was that all he did, threaten you with keeping you from getting your patch?”

“No. He beat the shit outta me that night.
That
make you feel better about it?”

Her eyes came up at that.

“I didn’t put up much of a fight. I knew he was right. I’d lied to my brothers. I’d lied to my sponsor. And maybe a part of me thought he was right about the rest, too.”

“The rest?”

“That I didn’t deserve you. That you deserved a lot better than me.”

“That night, you didn’t come back.”

He huffed out a breath. “Hell, my face was pretty busted up. I didn’t want you to see. It’s why I stayed away so long. I waited until I was mostly healed up before I finally called you.” He shrugged. “That and I was puttin’ it off as long as I could. But, Cole, he wasn’t having any of it. So, I called you. And I did what he’d ordered me to do. I broke it off with you.”

“Why didn’t you just tell me the truth? Why did you make me think you were just tired of me?”

“Because if I had, I knew you would have fought it. You wouldn’t have let
me end it.”

She looked away, knowing he was right.

“I know you, babe.” He swallowed then, as if he didn’t want to admit his next words. “You’re stronger than me. You would have broken me down.”

“And you didn’t want that,” she snapped.

“The club meant everything to me. That patch meant everything to me.”

“Yes, Shades. I found that out.”

“Until you walked out. And I realized what I’d done.”

“Right.”

“I went back for you. I did, Sky. Maybe it would have still been the end of us, but I wanted to apologize, to let you know it wasn’t your fault. I couldn’t handle how destroyed you looked. I’d done that to you. Me. And it was tearing me up.”

She didn’t say anything. She wasn’t sure what to believe.

“Where did you go?” he asked.

She shrugged. “It’s not important anymore.”

“Yeah, it is. It is to me. Tell me. Where have you been all these years?”

She looked up at him then. “Atlanta, Shades. I’ve been in Atlanta.”

His head pulled back an inch. “Atlanta?”

She nodded.

His brows rose in shock. “All this time…you’ve been just a couple hours ride from here?”

“Yes.”

“Fuck.”

She looked away and could feel her eyes filling. How she’d wanted him to come for her back then.

“Fuck. All these years. All these wasted years.” His head was bent, his eyes on the floor. And then he lifted his head, his eyes soft on hers, filled with what looked like regret. He shook his head. “I should have tracked you down. I should have come for you, Sky.”

“But you didn’t.”

“No, I didn’t. I can’t change that. But, you and me, Skylar, we’re not over.”

“We are.”

He shook his head. “Not by a long shot, honey. Now that I’ve got you back—”

“What makes you think you’ve got me back?”

His head pulled back, and he studied her face for a long moment. “Crash? You’re with him still? He left town. For good, the way I heard. And you’re here. I thought that was over.”

She swallowed, considering for a moment letting him continue thinking what he’d been led to believe. But in the end, she couldn’t do it. “No. I’m not with him, Shades. I never was.”

His eyes narrowed. “What do you mean
you never were
?”

“Crash and I, it’s not what you thought. We’re just friends.”

“So you and him…”

“No.”

“He never fucked you?”

“God, Shades!”

“Need to hear you say it. Need to hear those words come outta your mouth, Sky.”

“No, he never
fucked
me,
Shades. Happy?”

He studied her a long time, and then a slow grin pulled at his mouth. “Yeah. Ecstatic”

She rolled her eyes.

His smile faded. “All this time you let me think you were with him. Why?”

“It was the only thing I knew would keep you away. A brother doesn’t mess with another brother’s ol’ lady.”

He took a step away and ran an aggravated hand through his hair. “Christ, Skylar, you’ve been lying to me since the minute you rolled through those gates.”

She watched him begin pacing back and forth in front of her. “I never lied to you.”

He spun around back to her. “Okay then, half-truths and bullshit. You withheld the whole story, and that’s just as bad.”

“And what about you? You’ve done the same. You never told me the truth about why you sent me away. You told me you didn’t want me anymore.”

He stalked toward her. “I never said that. Never.”

“You let me believe it.”

His eyes searched hers, something powerful flaring to life in them. And then the words that came out of his mouth shocked her.

“Just get naked, and show me how sorry you are.”

“Sorry? For what?”

“For letting me think all this time you were with Crash. For all this time we’ve wasted.”

“Any wasted time we’ve had is your fault,” she argued right back.

A moment later, she found herself on her back on the bed. He’d bent, wrapped his arms around her thighs and lifted, heaving her back onto the bed, his big muscular body coming down on top of her, pinning her down. Her breath huffed out with her surprise, and she pushed on his shoulders. “Wait, Shades. What are you doing?”