Sidelined (18 page)

The stadium lot was packed. Tracy doubted there were that many people at their last home game the previous October. To his knowledge, there were no pre-season pep rallies scheduled. And if the new coaching regime thought it was a good idea to hold one, then why was he invited?

He caught up with Jude at the student entrance that was left wide open. Practice should be underway, what the hell was going on?

“You need to all quietly vacate the stadium, the police have been called, and as of this moment this has become a trespassing situation.” The voice sounded as if it came through a bullhorn. It sounded like the athletic director. A chorus of boos filled the heavy humid air. A drumbeat, then a cadence followed by more drums. And the school's fight song. His name was chanted on the beat. “Coach Wright. Coach Wright. Coach Wright.”

Britney saw them and came running from under the bleachers where it looked like she’d set up camp. “It’s been like this all afternoon. The team came out with bolt cutters and let themselves into the stadium. A few students followed. More came and then parents. I got a text up at the school and a bunch of us came over. The principal is livid. But what’s he going to do? He can’t expel the entire student population. And then most of the coaching and teaching staff sided with the kids. It’s been a hell of a scene. I’m proud as hell of these kids.”

“But what is going on? Why are they all here? Why am I here?” Tracy couldn’t hear the next bullhorn announcement over the sound of The Imperial March being played by the tuba section.

“They are protesting, stupid. For you. This past week has been horrible. We’ve all sat around too afraid to say a thing because we thought we’d lose our jobs too. But the team,
your
team was having it worse than anyone. Clancy Richmond went into a homophobic rant Tuesday when one of the guys asked when you were coming back. And they sort of exploded this afternoon.”

The chant of Save Coach Wright started up. Growing louder. Tracy leaned against the ticket booth, his head spinning. He blamed the heat, the humidity, and the hangover he’d nursed all week. But he was definitely spinning.

“I can’t be here. They’ll think I instigated this.”

“He’s right.” Jude spoke up. “They’ll think he’s resorted to guerilla tactics to get the board to change their minds.” Jude opened his portfolio and held out a pen. “Your kids are fighting for your job, Coach, time for you to fight for it too,” he said just as a news truck pulled up, and a reporter and cameraman climbed out before the driver came to a complete stop. “Oh, fuck, this circus just went viral. Sign the papers, Tracy. Let me fight for you. You’ve got nothing else to lose. And public opinion seems to be in your favor. I’m sure they don’t want a lawsuit. Just sign and get out of here. I’ll call you later to let you know what’s going on.”

He moved around behind the ticket booth, his eyes on the camera crew and not the paperwork. Britney shielded him from the two hurrying past. “Sign it, Tracy. I’ll stand with him. They can’t fire us both. Mom and Dad will hit the roof, and they don’t want that. Pillars of the community and all that jazz. Tracy took the pen and signed the forms. He didn’t ask what they were, he didn’t care anymore. He just wanted…Jude slipped a folded note in his hand as he took the portfolio back. Tracy waited until the two of them were rounding the end of the bleachers before he opened the note. He found Levi’s address on Royal Street scrawled in sloppy writing with the words
despite what you heard, he’s alone, and looked about the same as you did, nursing a broken heart.
That. He wanted that.

He had his keys in his hand and was on I-10 headed west before he could stop himself. Four hours passed in a blink of an eye. When he pulled up in front of the address Jude had given him, Levi’s car was parked outside of the townhouse he remembered from Halloween. He sat on the street frozen in fear, until an impatient driver behind him hit their horn, and he moved on. He found a space not far away and pulled in. Again, now that he was here, he didn’t know what to do. So he sat. And then he stopped sitting, because he had to fight for him. Bowen Murphy couldn’t throw him away like that, he didn’t deserve Levi Brody. Because Tracy did. Tracy deserved to have him. Because he loved him. He doubled over at the thought. Right there on the sidewalk. His heart pitched so hard against his chest, Tracy thought it was going to burst right out. He loved Levi, and he was not going to allow him to play second string in someone else’s relationship. Levi deserved better than that. He deserved to be first.

He stood in front of the door for what seemed like forever. He couldn’t bring himself to knock. He couldn’t breathe. Scared. Hell, he was fucking terrified. The door opened while he stood there gathering up his courage. But the wrong man answered. His heart sank to his knees.

“I was wondering if you’d show up.” Dylan Sunday held the door mostly open. He didn’t seem to be in any hurry to invite him in. “After the way you just walked out on him Monday, I shouldn’t let you in at all.”

And that pissed Tracy off. “He was busy declaring his love to your boyfriend. What was I supposed to do? I don’t know why I’m here now. I—just forget it…” He took a step down. He knew he was in retreat. He didn’t want to see how much Levi didn’t need him.

Dylan stepped out, leaving the door half open, to grab Tracy’s arm. “Is that what you heard? And you didn’t stop to think that he was under the influence of some heavy drugs?”

“I’d just lost my job, I wasn’t exactly ready to step in and declare myself. Especially when he really is in love with Bo. And I’m just a convenient stand in.”

“So if I tell you he thought that he was talking to you when he told Bo that, it wouldn’t matter? You’d just leave again? Like you’re about to do. Why’d you come this far? To break his heart again? He’s been hurt enough, if that’s your intention, just remember I will hunt you down.”

Tracy couldn’t find his tongue. His whole body had stopped working. Dylan Sunday stood a good four inches shorter than him and probably weighed seventy-five pounds less. But Tracy knew instinctively that his size didn’t matter. The protectiveness in Dylan’s eyes said he’d kill Tracy just for breathing Levi’s name wrong.

“Because I am in love with him. And I had to…have to fight for him. I was coming here to fight for him.”

The look in Dylan’s eyes went from lethal to soft. “I knew you did. You wouldn’t have thrown your career away for him if you didn’t. And the way you carried him out of the courtroom…made me tear up.” Dylan stepped aside. Nodding toward the door. “He’s upstairs, in the
glamour
room. Wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t just been in there. But he has a pink bed. Levi fucking Brody, who knew?”

He knew. At least he knew about Liv’s room, he was still wrapping his head around Levi and Liv being one and the same. “It’s not that pink. Just a little pink.”

Dylan laughed and patted his arm as he passed him on the steps. “You’ve got it bad, Coach. Real bad.” He sobered and reached into his back pocket for his wallet. “Speaking of that, Coach Shannon wants you to give him a call. I came over to get your number from Levi since he isn’t answering his phone, but he doesn’t have it.”

“Why would Shannon want to talk to me?” Tracy took the card Dylan offered him and stuck it in his back pocket with his wallet.

“I think to offer you a job. Since you need one. Or did I miss that you have a master’s in Sports Medicine? That and you have some coaching experience. More than I have at least. Oh and lock up, this isn’t a safe neighborhood. I still don’t know why Levi lives here. At least Bo had the sense to get out of town and behind a security fence.” And Sunday was gone. For a one-legged man, he moved with an incredible grace. Almost stealth-like. And Tracy had seen him run the past Sunday. There was nothing handicapped about that man. Nothing at all.

He let himself into the quiet house and bolted the door behind him. He remembered the narrow entry but only vaguely. He was too busy with Liv to remember much. The stairs were narrow and shallow. His feet didn’t fit. He remembered stumbling several times on the way to the third floor because he couldn’t take his mouth off Liv.

Soft music thrummed from the room farthest from the stairs, he walked softly, suddenly aware that he wore a ratty T-shirt and flip-flops. He wasn’t exactly dressed for winning his fair love’s hand. Since when did he become so foolish anyway? Levi didn’t care how he dressed. Any more than Tracy cared…he stopped cold in the open doorway, his breath gone completely, his heart stopped dead.

Levi was dressed in a pair of loose black pants with a gold
fleur de lis
on one leg. He’d rolled the waistband down, exposing his hip bones and a line of pubic hair. The vee of his abs made Tracy’s mouth go dry. He rose up on his toes, one arm stretched over his head, hand poised in a C shape. He dropped back onto his heels, feet turned outward and dipped low, hand sweeping the floor. Tracy didn’t dare move, he didn’t want to call attention to himself. Levi moved with the music, body fluid, he winced once when he moved his right arm. He spun on one foot, and came to a halt the moment his gaze caught Tracy’s.

“Don’t stop,” Tracy stepped into the room, mesmerized. This was Levi and ballet. He…his eyes grew fearful. He moved to the vanity across the room and hit the remote. The music ceased and silence echoed in the room.

“Why are you here?” Distance filled his voice when he finally spoke. “You made it clear what you thought of me Monday.”

Tracy had no idea what Levi was talking about. “I shouldn’t have left, I know…I’m sorry.”

Levi turned to face him now, his bad arm tucked against his chest, but not bound as it should be after the surgery. He clutched something small in his other hand. A tube of some kind. “This is the real me, Tracy. And you ran when you found out who I really am.”

Tracy searched his memory for something to clue him in. “Because of Liv? Because…I’m not following Levi…or should I call you Liv? Please help me here. I don’t know…”

“My real name is Leviticus. Levi or Liv,  they’re both me. Just don’t ever call me Leviticus, we’ll have a problem then.”

He remembered something Levi had said. “Judah. You called your brother Judah. I thought you were just being an ass to him.”

“Our father wanted to name him Judas. At least Mother had enough sense to change the last letter. He was saved from that at least. But no. Leviticus and Judah. The bastard children of a powerful man.”

There were so many warring emotions flitting across Levi’s face that Tracy couldn’t follow. Levi turned his back to him and sat on the bench in front of the vanity mirror. He bent his head, his shoulders slumped.

“Levi?”

But Levi wouldn’t look at him. He fumbled with the tube in his hand, trying to open it but having no luck with one working hand. “Just go back to Alabama. Okay? I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine. You’re hurting. And you’re breaking my heart.” Tracy crossed the room and straddled the bench beside Levi. He took the tube from his hand. Strawberry lip gloss. And opened it, handing the applicator to Levi.

“I’m breaking your heart? That’s rich. I let myself think that maybe you were different. I remembered you, not from the beginning but there at the end. I’ve never brought anyone here. Except you. Do you know how many nights I wished I’d let you tell me your name. Or that I’d asked for your phone number. There is something about you, Tracy. What is it about you?” He slicked his lips with the gloss pouting to admire his work. Tracy took the applicator back and held the two items apart watching as Levi sorted through a box on the vanity with shaking hands. He pulled out a black pencil. And then tossed it down again. “Fuck it, I can’t do it left-handed anyway.”

Tracy closed the gloss and picked up the eyeliner. “Turn sideways. Look at me, Levi.” Levi did, his golden eyes shooting angry sparks at him from the mirror. At the end of his patience, Tracy lifted Levi’s knee and turned him on the bench. Forcing him to look at him. He uncapped the pencil and cupped Levi’s chin.

“Look up.” Levi rolled his eyes, but made the face his sisters had all made when they put this junk on their eyes. “My oldest sister is Cynthia Darden. She models, maybe you’ve heard of her. She does some runway stuff. She did a cover for Seventeen Magazine when I was still a kid. She was fifteen. I guess she was a kid too. Anyway, she was obsessed with makeup. And she thought it was hilarious to use me to experiment with different looks. The problem was she couldn’t seem to apply makeup to herself. She kept closing her eyes every time she pointed a pencil or a brush. I learned to do eyes because I was eight and none of my brothers would spend time with me. Rodney was too self-centered to throw a ball around with me, and Avery was always in the field with our dad. He lived to drive the tractor. So there was me and the girls left at home. Britney is just a year older than me. We played ball. And dolls. Stuff like that. And Cindy did babysitting duties. Mom retired from her practice last year. She was a surgeon in Mobile. Which is why I went into medicine in the first place. After I quit football. But English was what I wanted to do. I read everything from about the age of four. I was reading before Rodney, and he’s three years older than me. Another thing that pissed him off. So there we are. My stupid screwed up family life. I have no secrets, Levi. I’m pretty much part Brady Bunch…all American perfect family. There, what do you think?” He turned Levi to face the mirror. “I’m rusty. But I can still draw it seems.” He capped the liner and placed it on Levi’s vanity. He dropped his hands to Levi’s thighs and waited while he looked at his eyes in the mirror.

“Better. I look like me. Almost.” His hand still shook when he laid it on Tracy’s. “Why are you telling me this? To make me feel worse about myself?”

“Is it possible to make you feel bad about yourself? You seem pretty well adjusted to me.” Levi snorted. “But it’s all a mask, isn’t it? When you put on the sunglasses and you drift into the ESPN voice, you’re acting a part. I didn’t notice it until Sunday when the local station interviewed you. You only wear the mirrored glasses to hide behind.”

Levi nodded. And looked away. Tracy didn’t like seeing him like this. So vulnerable. This wasn’t the Levi or the Liv he remembered. “It doesn’t matter. Even you rejected me. So…”