Silver (20 page)

Avery awoke from his dreams with no shadow of guilt or shame. It was true that as Kate had roused him from sleep, he felt the awkward nearness of her and he was as conscious as he ever was as to how he held his breath as she leant across him to collect up a scatter cushion from beside him. All the same senses and feelings were aroused that morning but for the first time, he had woken from sleep not having dreams of pinning the slim form of Kate beneath him; instead he had relived the previous evening he had spent with Elizabeth Bancroft. There was no doubting the young woman had been handsome but more than that, she was bold and arrogant. Every time she looked at him, her eyes searched his face defiantly as if daring him to touch her. And oh! he had wanted to touch her very much and judging by the faces of many of his companions at the club, he was not alone, including a very peeved Bateman. As his thoughts turned towards his friend, he frowned. Bateman had been talking of little else for a few weeks and had been visibly proud to have finally persuaded the young Miss Greenwood to venture into the nightlife. He had been even more visibly perturbed by her spending most of the evening on Avery’s arm instead of his own and his parting comments to Silver had been more than flecked with warning.

“
You would do well to remember that, whilst I am happy to have you share that back street whore, I mean to make Miss Greenwood my own. Do you understand?” The look which he levelled at Avery was, unmistakably, angry. As he recalled it, Avery groaned and rose to wash. Kate stopped midstream in her daily bustle to bring order to Avery’s room and watched his clumsy attempts to tame his hair.

“
You were back late last night,” she ventured. “I mean, I don’t mind waiting up for you. I just worried that you….” She allowed the thought to linger in the air before she brought it home to roost. “I worry every time you leave this house that someone might recognise you or that you’ll be found out.”

       
Her normally calm voice rose and Avery hushed her. Her uncharacteristic nervousness worried him and he turned to face her, smiling to try to lighten the mood. Kate was not so easily distracted and having taken the opportunity, she continued.

“
It’s all very well for you Avery, you are off, God knows where, and I am left here with an empty room and an empty bed to account for. I tiptoe past Mrs. Druce’s room and in to the kitchen and sit in the cold. And it is cold in the kitchen at night you know. Not that I mind that but there I sit silently, all alone in the dark thinking about how many ways you could have come a cropper before you knock for me to let you in. And then the knock comes which always makes me jump half out my own skin. I don’t know how my heart can stand it, even when I open the door, I never know if it’s going to be you or a policeman come to deliver bad news and then there’s the thought that on your way back up the stairs we are going to meet someone from the house. Arthur, Mary-Ann, your father!! And there I am! Swanning up before you as if it’s the most natural thing in the world to have your mistress follow you up the servant’s stairs after midnight dressed as a man!”

       
The stream of consciousness poured out without her taking any breath and Avery stood before her, shocked. Not at the fact she was saying any of it but that she had not told him before. Whilst he had known there was risk on her part, she had assured him so many times and, foolishly, he had not considered it again. Kate stood before him and, wrung out by her outpouring, she looked at her feet.

“
Kate.” He offered his hand to her and she took it but did not look at him.

“
I’m sorry.” He pressed his finger to his own lips to silence her as she looked up at his words. ‘And I should be sorry too. I had not considered any of what you have just told me. I had thought the dangers all to be my own and that is not true. I am more grateful to you now than I have ever been because I know now what loyalty you afford me.’ He watched as her eyes rose to meet his, the hint of a blush forming upon her pale face. ‘But I do not know how to repay you.’

“
Repay me?” Kate looked at him searchingly.

“
Please, let me finish.” He dropped her hand and walked to the window. “I fear that you think that what I am doing is for sport or for pleasure.” He wheeled around and clapped his hands. “And do not misunderstand me Kate, much of this gives me enormous pleasure but I need you to understand that this is no whim.”

       
He dropped his gaze to meet her own and she nodded.

“I know, sir.”

“I mean to leave this life behind Kate,” he gestured at himself and the room around him.

“
The house?” She narrowed her eyes, not understanding him.

“
The house, the life I lead within it. This!” He picked up a discarded dress from the stand beside him and dropped it to the floor. “Whilst I am here, I cannot be myself and whilst I cannot be myself, I cannot be happy.”

       
Kate watched him warily as he tried to make his meaning clear.

“
But what about your father?” she said. What about me, she wanted to add.

       
Avery sat down on the stool beside the dressing table and put his head in his hands. “I don’t know, but we must leave this all behind, Kate. Don’t you see?”

“We?”

“I mean…I need you Kate, far more than you realise and I cannot do any of this without you. If you would only see how much this all……”

       
The knock that came at the door made each of them jump far higher than they both imagined was possible. Avery was roused to a standing position and instinctively, given the recent comings and goings within the room, he darted around the room looking for any clues which may give his double life away. Kate, busy doing the same, scurried to the door and, acknowledging the young scullery girl, scurried off without another word to Avery thus not finding out what her mistress had been about to say to her.

~o~

The slightly serious tone of the conversation with Kate had unnerved Avery and, after such a frivolous evening as the previous nights, he was not keen to hang around to discuss the matter again. He knew that he would have to face her again soon and the question of both their futures was becoming a pressing one but whilst he could avoid it, he would. As his heartbeat returned to normal his thoughts turned to Elizabeth Greenwood and the parting invitation she had cast at him as it became clear that Bateman was taking her home.

“
You look like a man who enjoys nature Mr. Silver?”

“
Indeed?” he had inclined his head with a questioning look.

       
Bateman had gripped her tighter and given Silver a sharp look.

“
I hope I will bump into you again sometime. Perhaps I have seen you already? Do you walk in Hyde Park of an afternoon?”

“
Yes, a walk always lifts my mood in the afternoon Miss Greenwood.”

“
Particularly after one is feeling rotten,” she offered finally. The young woman, now slightly worse for wear had smiled suggestively at him before being wheeled away by Bateman.

       
It was less than subtle and Avery expected Bateman, having heard the exchange, would also be found in the vicinity of the Hyde Park area. Yet, as he strolled along the edge of Rotten Row, he was surprised to see Miss Greenwood, seemingly alone. He watched her for some minutes before noticing a young maid several feet behind keeping a sluggish pace with the languid steps of her mistress. He smiled to himself as he recognised the delicate way in which Miss Greenwood moved. The day was not particularly bright and the air was already beginning to become warm with a thick haze settling in the air between them and the high sun. Elizabeth Greenwood wore a hat, tilted to shield her eyes a little and even at this distance, Avery could see that she kept her eyebrows knotted as if the bright light pained her. He chuckled to himself wondering if she would even remember suggesting that he meet her here and whether he would find her as disarming as he had found her last night.

“
Miss Greenwood?” He stepped out from the edges of the sandy pathway and raised his hat to, the now stationary, Miss Greenwood.

“
Mr. Silver! I declare! What a coincidence!” The words were delivered flatly but with a smile that assured Silver she had full recollection of the previous evening. As the young maid drew up behind her mistress, her eyes rolled at the advent of Silver upon their afternoon’s stroll. The gesture was not entirely lost on Silver and he wondered how it was possible that this girl was able to gad about one of the most public thoroughfares in London with only a naïve young maid as chaperone greeting young men so gaily. He was full of admiration for the young woman but more than that; he was intrigued by her confidence.

“
What a surprise indeed!” Avery returned loudly, his own tone matching hers for mock incredulity. “You have brightened up what was threatening to be a very dull day Miss Greenwood.”

“
I was just remarking to Cribbs here the very same thing. Wasn’t I Cribbs?” Elizabeth did not look at the maid stood behind her and in return the young girl did not glance at her mistress or Avery as she returned, monosyllabically. “Yes, Miss.”

“Do you care to join us?”

“I would be delighted.” Avery offered up his arm and felt her gloved fingers, at first light upon the sleeve of his jacket, press purposefully upon his forearm as they began to walk on. Elizabeth set the pace and they were soon many paces in front of Cribbs who, in turn, had cut her stride to allow her mistress the distance she obviously was seeking for this interlude.

“
How do you do this morning Miss Greenwood?”

       
Elizabeth Greenwood rolled her eyes and threw her head back, the veins on her neck rippling. It was a vulnerable pose but showed great strength.

“
Oh Mr. Silver. I am afraid you will find this amusing but I feel quite unwell. There! I knew you would be unsympathetic.” She pushed out her bottom lip and tried to look cross as Avery chuckled. “I am afraid I have not built up the constitution that you have.” She smiled and pressed his arm again.

“
Yet!” he countered.             

       
Flashing a quick glance behind them to ensure they were well out of the earshot of Cribbs, Elizabeth whispered. ‘I hope I did not get you into any trouble with Mr. Bateman last night. He could not fail to lift his mood all the way home and I feel I am much to blame for his dour spirit having spent most of the evening with you instead of he.’ She had leant in to deliver this and her breath was warm upon Avery’s neck making his jaw clench in response to the current of pleasure she had sent down his spine. “No trouble, Miss Greenwood. I can assure you that Giles is quite alright. I am sure he was simply tired.”

“
Merely tired you say? I suppose that would explain the dark look he gave you but what do you think he meant by you and he sharing a woman when we left last night?”

       
Avery felt his cheeks colour a little. So she had heard! It was awkward but he felt sure she had been in such a heady state that he could convince her she had heard incorrectly.

“
You must be mistaken, Miss Greenwood. I do not know what you mean.”

       
She leant away from him as they walked, considering him with a raised eyebrow, questioningly.

“
Mr. Silver, if I have given you the impression that wool may be pulled over my eyes then I am sorry to disappoint. I hope you will credit me with the truth more frequently than I am at present intending to meet you again.”

       
Her tone remained utterly charming and her eyes danced mischievously and Avery felt a little dizzy at the speed of her tongue. Bateman had spent many evenings recently recanting to both he and Goodwin at how the girl dazzled and lashed at one and the same time.

“
Which is?” he ventured.

“
At the moment, never,” she replied. “You have ten minutes to make me change my mind.” With that she broke her grip on his arm and turned to face her maid, who had been left behind a little and was panting a little in the heat of the afternoon sun.

“
Cribbs? It’s awfully warm, would you be a dear and run and fetch us some lemonade whilst we take some shade over there?” She indicated to a broad sweep of trees on the easterly bank of the Serpentine beside which several wrought iron benches had been positioned to take advantage of the view. It was an area Avery knew well, for he had spent several evenings taking in a promenade amongst his fellow Londoners. Even the bench that Elizabeth now led him to was familiar. He had sat and watched many sunsets across the long lake after an early evening. It was a great place to watch people as they passed by. He would take note of how gentlemen greeted each other, how they tipped their hats, clasped each other firmly by the hand and then the elbow effusively. How they fumbled with their trousers when they thought they were not being watched or, when the shadows began to lengthen, how they approached one another, gauging the other’s intent. He himself had been approached by another man on one such evening. He had been caught in a bit of a reverie and found himself staring too hard as a man had stopped to adjust himself when he noticed Avery watching him. The man was short but his clothes were well tailored, if a little crumpled. Avery suspected the man was a city gent but the faint whiff of alcohol as he approached warned him that the man was a little the worse for wear.