Silver Dew (24 page)

“There it is,” Sebastian pointed to the tall, reddish spires rising up above the buildings at the end of the street we were on. As we rounded the next curve in the road, the church came into full view.

St. Nicholas’s Church was a beautiful, old, red brick building. The architecture and design of it reminded me of a medieval castle with its high-arched windows, two tall spires and rounded tower. My heart beat faster at the sight, my pulse raced, my breathing came quick and light as I realized that all my wants were about to be realized and fulfilled.

We walked quickly hand-in-hand, grinning at each other. I felt almost as if I were dreaming. It was hard to believe that in just minutes, I could be Sebastian’s wife. The light blue sky was dotted with clouds overhead, the warm summer sun shone down brightly upon us, the beautiful Berlin streets were picturesque and even the happy tourists and friendly-faced locals that we passed all seemed to share in our joy– it was all so perfect. I smiled back at each welcoming face I saw, feeling unusually confident and proud. A girl with reddish-gold hair immediately stood out to me but it wasn’t because of her exotic, wavy hair or her intense, green eyes or even the rougher, slightly-punk way that she dressed, including the low-cut tight black tank top that she wore. It was the recognition in her eyes when she met mine and then the stunned surprise that overtook her expression that made me come to a stumbling halt.

“Gracelynn, what’s–” Sebastian didn’t have to finish his sentence. He followed my gaze and his words were choked off in his throat. He stiffened by my side, all the color instantly draining from his face.

The day suddenly became darker, colder. The sun slipped behind a cloud.

The girl was one of the Others, there was no doubt about that in my mind. I knew her, I recognized her. I felt connected to her somehow. Her moment of hesitation was over though, the shock of seeing us had passed and she had now settled on a course of action. The determination was clear in her face, even out-numbered she was going to try to make trouble. She was charging straight towards us. I clutched at my necklace in fear, bracing myself for what was about to come.

“Run!” the red-headed girl yelled, fear flashing through her stunning green eyes. “Sebastian - run!”

My own fear was replaced by confusion. I couldn’t understand what was happening – was this some kind of trick?

“It’s Caoilinn! Sebastian, it’s Caoilinn!” she hollered in her thick Irish accent. Her eyes were wide, her face pale as she rushed towards us, towards him. “For the love of God, I want you to run!” she yelled, her voice begging and her eyes pleading as she came flying down the street towards us. She had almost reached us now and I could clearly see there were tears in her eyes. It was then that I realized she was afraid, that she thought she needed to protect Sebastian – from
me
. The absurdity of it almost made me laugh but at the same time, a strange nauseous feeling began to rise up in my stomach. There was something wrong here, something very wrong.

The girl came to a stop just a few feet before us. At least one of us must have wanted for no one to take notice of the strange scene we were causing as the crowds passed us by completely unaware of anything amiss. I was surprised that Sebastian hadn’t moved an inch. He was normally so much more protective of me than this. Perhaps he had realized before I did that the girl wasn’t really a threat. I couldn’t understand the strange expression on his face.

“You stubborn ass, why don’t you run?” the girl demanded, tears of frustration and fear spilling down her lightly freckled cheeks. Her eyes darted to me and she unexpectedly flinched away from my curious and confused gaze. There was something else present in her eyes, something more than just the fear. I felt the connection between us again, a sudden and inexplicable outrage and fury flaring up in my gut as our eyes briefly met. Who was she? “Why won’t you run?” she repeated, looking only at Sebastian.

“Because I don’t want to.” Sebastian finally spoke in a firm but unexpectedly quiet voice. He moved, stepping closer to my side and wrapping his arm tightly around my waist. I couldn’t understand why he sounded almost… ashamed.

“What have you done to him?” The girl turned to face me with blazing green eyes. I could see the fear in them still but it was quickly being replaced by her anger. I tried not to feel intimidated but it was suddenly quite hard. Though she was smaller than me, she was obviously tougher, her petite body curved and muscled and the expression in her eye making it quite clear that she would be more than willing to take me on.

“She hasn’t done anything except save my life and love me for all that I am unworthy of it.” Sebastian answered for me. “Now stop it, Mags. That’s enough.”

The girl’s eyes flashed again. She glared at me and I felt myself shrinking away from the heat of her hatred. I turned towards Sebastian, seeking his reassurance.

“Sebastian?” I spoke his name uncertainly, a thousand questions in my eyes as I waited for him to look at me. “Sebastian, who is she? What’s going on?”

He hesitantly met my gaze, his eyes full of shame and regret. I could see the silent plea in them, begging for my forgiveness. My stomach dropped and I swallowed hard. I knew I wasn’t going to like what I was about to hear.

“She’s one of the Others – the first one to ever join me. We can trust her, I think,” he added quietly. “Her name is Magdalene.”

“My name is Mags,” the girl interrupted, angrily brushing the tears from her face. “Mags Caldwood.”

“Caldwood?” I echoed, confused. I looked at Sebastian questioningly but he had dropped his eyes to the ground again. It was the girl who answered me, her voice full of smug, self-satisfied pride as she glared into my eyes. She definitely no longer seemed afraid.

“I’m Sebastian’s wife.”

Chapter Ten – Nightmare

I stared at Mags dumbly, unable to understand what she was saying. Why would she say that she was Sebastian’s wife? And why wasn’t he denying it? What kind of trick was this? My mind couldn’t comprehend what was going on.

“You
were
my wife,” Sebastian quietly corrected. “Once, a very long time ago.” He pulled me more tightly against his side but I was barely aware of his warmth. My whole body had gone numb, the bright, romantic, excitement that had been building within me had been severed, snuffed out, completely destroyed by this beautiful, small, red-headed “teen” before us.

“I still am.” Mags’ green eyes were defiant but her expression was one of intense hurt at Sebastian’s rejection. The obvious pain that he was causing her hurt me too – it confirmed their relationship and the strength of her feelings for him even though I was certain they couldn’t have seen each other in hundreds of years. It made me feel physically ill nonetheless. “We never divorced.”

“We’ve been separated for three hundred years.”

“Because you abandoned me. Because you just got up one day and disappeared, leaving me alone to search for you but never able to find you. I’ll enjoy letting you make it up to me,” Mags added with a smirk. She glanced at me nervously as she spoke though, almost as if she were worried I might… do what? I was only just regaining the ability to speak.

“She’s your wife?” I whispered, the world still spinning dangerously around me.

“She was,” Sebastian confirmed. “Gracelynn, I swear I didn’t remember her until this very moment. There were glimpses of her face in my memories but I never… I’m so sorry. I thought she was dead.”

I took a shaky breath and moved a step away from him so that I might see his face. His skin was still too pale, his dark eyes wide with fear and guilt. I watched his eyes flood with pain as I moved away but I didn’t let it stop me.

“So that’s how you did it, you crafty old bastard,” Mags suddenly commented. The way she spoke shocked me; it wasn’t just her coarse language, it was the familiar and affectionate way she cursed Sebastian. She was looking back and forth between us with a wary but speculative expression on her pretty, heart-shaped face. “You wanted to convince yourself I was dead, so you did. I wouldn’t ever let you forget me but if you believed I was dead… it was the only way you could leave me. But why?”

“I don’t owe you any explanations, Mags, so stop asking.” Sebastian’s voice was a low, unfriendly growl. I watched the pain flash across Mags’ eyes again and I felt my nausea rise.

“Don’t be angry at me because she made you forget me!” Mags accused, glaring at me again with her challenging, emerald eyes. “How dare you blame me for Caoilinn’s goddamn lies?”

“She didn’t make me forget.”

“She’s the only one who could have. She didn’t want you to remember me, so you forgot,” the girl insisted.

“I forgot everything, Mags. She’s the reason why I can remember your name. If it weren’t for Gracelynn, I wouldn’t even recognize your face. I’d forgotten it all and she gave me all of my memories back – recently too. Though obviously, I’ve been having some trouble sorting through it all,” Sebastian mumbled, his eyes starting to fall out of focus.

The color drained from Mags’ face, her freckles a light dusting across her snow white pallor. Her lips parted to let out a quiet gasp.

“What do you mean all of your memories?” she quietly demanded, her eyes burning with a fiery intensity into Sebastian’s. His gaze refocused on her face.

“I meant exactly what I said. She restored all of my memories, right back to the day I was born. I can remember almost all of my life now… well, most of it, sometimes.”

“No,” she hissed, her eyes widening with fear and horror. She turned to me, acknowledging my presence again as she locked her gaze with mine. A strange sense of
deja-vu
washed over me as she spoke. “What have you done?”

“I…” I fumbled for the right words beneath her heated glare, suddenly feeling awkward and discomposed. “I… Sebastian wanted to remember his past and I wanted him to remember too. I had a dream and I remembered his true name, so I told him–”

“No!” Mags looked outraged. She stepped forward and started to reach for me. Something made her hesitate and she slapped her hand down angrily against her thigh instead. “Don’t you effin’ understand? You idiot! He can’t remember everything, it will kill him! There’s not enough room in his mind for all those memories–”

“I know,” I cut her off, a quiet strength behind my words that seemed to catch her attention. She took a small, uncertain step back. I felt like she was constantly reevaluating me and I didn’t like it.

“It did almost kill me,” Sebastian agreed. “Gracelynn saved me by recasting the Binding spell between our souls.”

Mags’ eyes automatically went to the cuff of my sleeve where the last coil of my tattoo was visible, wrapping around the base of my thumb and curling into the palm of my hand. She looked at the mark with narrowed eyes.

“She’ll be the death of you yet.” She spoke only to Sebastian again in a low soft voice, turning her body away from me slightly. “I was one of the five who helped to erase your memories of the past. It was the only way to keep you sane. What this girl has done… it would take at least five of us to undo it now and none of the Others would be willing to help us anymore. The memories will destroy your mind, Sebastian. They’ll eventually kill you,” she finished, her voice hollow, her eyes full of anger and hopeless fear.

I immediately thought of the headaches Sebastian had been suffering, the slow increase in his nightmares, the periods of confusion, the nosebleeds – and I knew she was right. I could see in Sebastian’s eyes that he knew it too, that he probably had for some time. I was horrified and overwhelmed with guilt. For a split second, I felt my heart stop beating and my breath abruptly halt as all I wanted was to die right then and there, on the spot. It didn’t last longer than that brief second.

Mags met my gaze, fire burning in her eyes. “Why did you do it? How could you do this to him?” she demanded fiercely.

“I asked her to, Mags,” Sebastian pointed out, his voice firm yet weary. He turned to me, his eyes urging me to accept his words. “None of this is your fault, Gracelynn. You didn’t know.”

“It’s all my fault.”

No one answered, no one argued with me. I didn’t want to hear their lies anyway.

“Typical, Caoilinn. Always thinking of yourself and your own wants and never considering anyone or anything else. Never thinking beyond the moment and taking into account the consequences of your impulsive desires,” Mags practically spat at me. I glared back at her, squeezing my pendant tightly in my fist for strength as I spoke.

“I am not Caoilinn. My name is Gracelynn.” There was a clear warning in my tone. Mags visibly hesitated, her anger cooling slightly.

“I don’t give a damn what name you go by - it doesn’t change who you are.”

“Tell us what you’re doing here Mags,” Sebastian brusquely demanded.

“Apart from searching for you like I have been every day for the past three hundred or so years?”

“What are you doing here?” Sebastian repeated impatiently.

A smile tugged at the corner of Mags’ mouth. “About two months ago now, the Others began to remember you. I’d been keeping tabs on ‘em, waiting for the day when it happened. I heard you were in Europe and I knew you’d need my help so I’ve been working my ass off trying to find you ever since. Every time I tried to leave Berlin, I’d find myself back here again, in St. Nicholas Quarter. I knew I’d find you here eventually, once you wanted my help, so I’ve been waiting.”