Sinful Ever After (Sinful Serenade Book 5) (38 page)

"More," Meg says.

My cheeks flush. "I'm right here."

"You love it. You two are both pervs. You're perfect for each other." Meg winks. "You want to look with us, or do you want us to take charge?"

I motion to the other side of the store. "Divide and conquer."

Madison nods. She giggles as she follows Meg to the rack of dresses on the left. I get to work with the rack on the right.

Before Mom left and everything went to hell, I was a normal little girl. I thought about weddings and princesses and fairytale castles. But I didn't think much about the dress. More about Prince Charming whisking me away from my life.

I guess, even then, I realized things weren't exactly peachy keen.

I fall into a trance as I flip through dresses. Each is beautiful but completely different. I haven't got a clue how to start narrowing it down.

Or if I'm even going to need a gown.

What if he's a hundred percent sure he wants kids?

I'm not going to keep him from the life he wants.

Madison's squeal echoes around the room. "Come here, Jessie! We found it. It's perfect!"

I take a deep breath. I'm not sure I'm ready.

"It really is nice," Meg agrees.

Madison holds the dress up. It's a strapless mermaid gown. The ivory bodice is sleek and beaded. The tulle skirt flares into a dramatic fishtail.

It's beautiful.

"Let's try it now! If it's perfect, we'll be done for the day. Yeah?" Madison asks.

She has a point. "Okay." I press my palms together. Already, my heart is racing. This dress might be my wedding dress. If we...

No, I can't think about that right now.

I need to focus.

Madison leads the way to the dressing room. It's decorated in shades of pink. The mirrors are in ornate, silver frames. It's straight out of a princess castle. It's almost too cute.

Madison pushes her short blond hair behind her ears. "You want me to help you get into the dress?"

"Please." I haven't got a clue how to lace the corset back.

My sister pulls the curtains to one of the dressing stalls. The thing is the size of my old apartment and it's just as pink as the rest of the store.

Madison laughs. "The place has a theme." She takes in the hot pink walls and shakes her head. "And I thought that we had it bad."

She works at a fancy boutique in midtown Manhattan. It's nearly an hour and a half on the Long Island Rail Road then the subway, but she loves it.

"How is work?" I ask.

"I'm assistant manager now." She hangs the dress on a hook. She's holding something else too—a longline bra. "I'm saving up to get my own place. I'm not sure if I can afford Manhattan, but I can't take that commute anymore." Her lips curl into a frown.

"I worry about Dad too."

Her hair falls in her eyes as she shakes her head. "He's doing better. And... well, you were right. He's fifty. He needs to stand on his own two feet. We need to have our own lives. There are all sorts of fashion internships in Manhattan. I'm never going to move on if I'm always racing to Penn Station to make the last Babylon train."

"I'm happy for you."

She smiles. "Thanks, but today is about your dress. And your wedding to the hottest guy in the universe." She clears her throat. "Sorry. I should probably stop reminding you that I've had dirty thoughts about your groom."

"Yes. You should. But I don't blame you." The man is dripping with sex appeal.

Madison blushes. She shakes it off. "Okay, girly. Strip to your panties. You
are
wearing panties, aren't you?"

"Would you really want to know if I wasn't?"

"You're right. I wouldn't. But for the sake of this crinoline-" she nods to the underskirt hanging on the rack— "I'd suffer through the knowledge enough to grab you some bridal lingerie."

"I am wearing panties."

She sighs with relief. I guess my reputation as a sex-crazed pervert has preceded me.

Usually, I feel nothing but pride about how often Pete and I make each other come. But with this
do you want kids
question hanging over my head, sex feels like a terrifyingly loaded subject.

Again, I remind myself to focus. It doesn't work. Half my attention stays on the possibility of us calling off the wedding.

By this time tomorrow, it could be over. No more Jess and Pete.

I'll be alone again. But it's much worse than solitude. I'll be empty and joyless without him.

Fuck. I have to focus.

I take a deep breath and undress.

Madison helps me into the longline bra and the crinoline underskirt.

She gives me a quick once-over. "You really do have a nice figure. How come I have such a flat ass?"

"Because you have those." I point to her ample chest. "It wouldn't be fair if you got T
and
A."

She laughs, her voice as lively as it was before Nathan fucked up our relationship. "You're right. It wouldn't be fair." She loosens the corset lacing. "I guess I'll have to wear something low cut when I get married, to show off
my
assets."

"Absolutely." I laugh, but it's only at fifty percent.

"Ah. Got it." Gently, she pulls the neckline of the dress open. "Usually, it's easier to step into a dress. But with this one hugging your hips, I think we should pull it over your head. Put your arms up at your ears."

I do.

She gathers the dress around her hands. Then she's lifting it over my head and pulling it over my arms and down my torso.

All I see is the ivory lining.

Shit. The dress hits my glasses all wrong. They fall to my stomach. Then they're on the ground.

"Don't move!" I squeak.

"Glasses?"

"Yeah."

"Stay there." She drops to the floor and reaches under my skirt. "Got it."

I can hear Madison moving, setting my glasses on the stool behind us.

She tugs the dress over my hips and knees. Even with the back unlaced, the dress is snug on my hips.

I can't quite make out the details of my reflection. Without my glasses, all I see is the light bouncing off my dress.

"Give me a second." Madison moves behind me and gets to work lacing the dress. "Take a deep breath."

I do. She pulls the lacing snug, so the dress is hugging my waist and my chest.

"There. Done." Her voice brightens. "It looks perfect, Jessie. Let's go to the big mirrors."

"Okay. But I need my glasses."

She reaches for something. "Got 'em."

Madison takes my hand and leads me to the main room.

There are two mirrors in the center of the room. Madison leads me between them. I can only get the gist without my lenses. The ivory dress hugs my chest, waist, and hips, then flares out at my knees.

Meg jumps from her seat. "Oh my God! You look amazing, Jess."

"She can't see yet." Madison brandishes my glasses. She turns to me. "Are you ready to melt?"

"Yes."

Gently, she slides my glasses onto my face. It's always a little disarming when the world goes from fuzzy to sharp. I blink a few times to help my eyes settle.

With my hair pulled behind my back, my eye goes straight to the sweetheart neckline. The curve is flattering on my less than ample chest.

The dress hugs my figure like it's made for it.

It's beautiful.

I'm beautiful in it.

A tear stings my eye. Then another. My fingers go to my cheeks, but it's not fast enough to keep the tears from falling off my cheeks.

I'm not sure if these are happy tears or
fuck, what if this doesn't work?
tears. I let them fall until I'm crying so hard I can barely speak. "It's perfect."

Madison throws her arms around me. "It's perfect."

Then Meg takes her turn hugging me. "It
is
perfect, Jess. You look amazing. And hot."

I laugh. "Thank you."

"He's going to tear that thing off you the second you're alone," Meg says.

"Is that a wedding night tip?" I ask.

She laughs. "No, we waited until we were in our hotel room. The corset back is complicated, but Miles is a singer. Not as much dexterity." She wiggles her hand. Her cheeks flush. "Not that I have any complaints."

Emotions well up in my chest. I'm excited, but I'm also terrified.

Meg and Madison help me find accessories, but I'm not really paying attention. The question is burning into my brain.

I need to talk to him.

I need to talk to him now.

***

I
send Pete a
call me
text but my phone stays silent.

I'm in a daze all afternoon. I barely hear anything Madison or Meg says.

Thankfully, Madison is as good with hair and makeup as she is with clothes. She leads the stylists.

We're halfway through hair and makeup when my phone buzzes. Pete.

Pete: Everything okay?

Jess: I think so, but I need to talk to you.

Pete: Did you get a dress?

Jess: Yeah. Everything is ready, I'm all measured. I just have to call the shop to confirm.

Pete: You waiting for something?

Jess: To talk.

Pete: You're scaring me, baby.

Jess: Do you really get scared?

Pete: When it's about you? Yeah, I get fucking terrified.

Jess: Where are you?

Pete: Getting a suit.

Jess: Didn't you bring a suit?

Pete: Wanted something special.

He's amazing. We have to work this out. All other options are inconceivable.

Jess: Send me the address.

Pete: Promise you'll be okay.

Jess: I will. After we work this out.

He sends the address.

I press the phone to my chest. My updo is still only half-done, but I can tell the style will work.

My makeup looks good. A little dark, but good. I should wait until the stylist is finished, but I can't wait anymore.

I nod a thank you to the hair stylist. "This will be fine. I can imagine it, and it's great. Just brown eyelashes and liner on the day. Okay?"

She nods.

I grab my purse and my coat. "Um, I'm gonna go. You guys okay without me?"

Meg smiles. "Go fuck your groom."

"We're only going to talk," I say.

Madison laughs. "Come on, Jessie. No one is buying that story."

––––––––

P
ete

I'm going fucking crazy.

If she wants to call this off...

My heart won't survive if she calls this off. Not sure my body or my mind will do much better.

I'll still have my bass, still have my books, still have my friends, still have Mom (no doubt, she'll tell me I did this to myself by pushing Jess too hard), still have the band, but...

Fuck. Can't entertain this thought. If it comes to that, I'll find a music shop, grab a bass and an amp, find a practice room, and play until my hands are bleeding.

I've been dumped once. That was enough to make me realize there's no talking someone into or out of loving you.

Usually, I'm incredibly fucking persuasive. But that won't do shit for me if she wants to call this off.

The sales guy eyes me nervously. That
what the hell is with that dude?
look. He doesn't recognize me. Usually, it's a relief to be a normal guy and not a famous musician. Not right now.

At the moment, I'm more than willing to cash in my celebrity.

God damn, I don't like shit I can't control.

My heart will be dust if she leaves me. There won't be enough of it to stitch it back together.

Fuck. Anything beats standing here waiting. I try picking out a tie that will match our colors—teal and dark blue, like the ocean—but there's never been a less interesting subject in the history of the fucking world.

The bell rings as the door to the shop opens.

Light surrounds Jess. It bounces off her blond hair, casting her in an angelic glow.

That can't hide the frustration in her expression.

Is that
I have a secret
frustration or
I'm about to leave you and I don't want to hurt you
frustration?

"Hey." Her voice is barely a whisper.

The guy at the counter looks from her to me. "Your bride?"

Fuck, I hope so. I nod.

He smiles at Jess. "Why don't you help him with the tie? He's been staring for ten minutes."

Has it really been only ten minutes? Feels like it's been ten years.

She smiles back to the guy then she comes close enough to whisper. "Uh, you've got some shades of blue-green there. Is that our color theme?"

She's talking about the wedding like it's still on.

That's good.

"Color of the ocean," I say.

Her eyes light up as she smiles. But there's still all this frustration on her face.

She grabs the dark teal tie then she looks to me. "This should work."

I nod. She's wearing makeup. Half her hair is pulled behind her head. The other half is hanging over her chest in soft waves. "You look gorgeous."

"Thanks." She gives me a long once-over. "You look jump your bones handsome in that suit."

"You'll have to keep it in your pants during the ceremony."

She smiles. "That will be harder for you than it is for me."

Haven't got a doubt about that. In fact, whatever this is, we
will
get through it. We have to. After-I nod to the dressing room.

She raises a brow. "You have a one-track mind, Steele."

"You want to talk. That will give us privacy." It doesn't hurt that the stall door goes all the way to the floor.

She presses her lips together. Her cheeks flush.

I check that the sales guy isn't looking, and I lead her into the dressing stall.

She locks the door. "It's hot in here, huh?" She hangs her coat on the hook on the door.

I nod.

Her eyes go to mine as she pulls her sweater over her head. I haven't got the faintest clue what she wants to talk about, but it suddenly seems less important. Her tank top hugs her chest and waist. The neckline is low enough that the lace of her bra peeks out.

"Put me out of my misery before I tear off the rest of your clothes." Need to get this out before any more blood goes to my cock. I'm already getting hard. "You want to call off the wedding?"