Sly the Sleuth and the Pet Mysteries (3 page)

“Well, now,” Kate's mother said in a reasonable tone. “There's some mistake here. That's Clarissa.”

“This is Punky,” said the woman named Julie. She didn't sound at all reasonable. She sounded like Kate.

“Everyone please sit down and have cookies and milk,” I said.

“I don't eat cookies and milk,” said the woman named Julie.

Jack jumped beside me and took the dish. “I'll eat them all.”

Clarissa looked at the milk. “Meow,” she said.

“This is why your cat is so fat,” I said. “She has convinced all of you that she belongs to you.

And all of you feed her. So she gets a lot more food than she needs.”

“But she's mine,” said Kate.“I got her when she was just a kitten. Tell them, Mother.”

“No, she's mine,” said the woman named Julie. “I paid for her to get fixed.”

“So that's why she can't have babies,” said Kate.

“She's mine,” said Jack.

We all looked at him to hear his reason. But he just stuffed another cookie in his mouth.

“Put my cat down right now,” said Kate.

“Kate,” said Kate's mother, “you don't have to be rude.” She looked at the woman named Julie. “We need to talk. Why don't you put Clarissa down and have a seat?”

“I don't think so. I'm taking her home,” said the woman named Julie.

“No you don't,” said Jack. “Give her to me.”

“Wait,” I said.“This can work out. Listen.You've all been happy with this cat so far, right?”

“Right,” they said together.

“So you can continue sharing her.You just have to agree to cut back on how much you feed her.”

They were quiet for a minute.

“That'll save me some money,” said Jack.

“And we can take turns bringing her to the vet,” said Kate's mother. She tilted her head at the woman named Julie. “That will save even more money.”

“True,” said the woman named Julie. She squatted and slowly set Clarissa on the floor.

We all looked at Kate.

“All right,” she said finally.

So my first case ended in success. And Taxi purred the whole time I told her about it.

That was two months ago. Clarissa-Fluffy-Punky is now a little thinner. And no one has complained. I introduced her to Taxi and they play sometimes. And she now has a much sturdier collar that she can't pop off, with three phone numbers on one side and
C-F-P
on the other.

Kate's mother and the woman named Julie have become sort of friends.They jogged together a few times, until Julie hurt her knee. Now they lift weights in Kate's basement on Saturday mornings.

I traded the two doll dresses for some baseball cards.That was with Melody. I hadn't even known she collected them before. It's funny what you don't know about the people around you.

I came home from school on Friday and headed for the backyard hammock.

Brian came over from next door.“Are you tired?”

“Yes,” I said.

“Because you had a rough day at school?”

“Yes,” I said, although it wasn't a particularly rough day. But with Brian it's best to keep answers short.

“My day was rough too,” said Brian.

“How could nursery school be rough?” I said.

But I knew right away that was a bad question.

For one, Brian would answer. So that meant he would stay awhile. For another, I remembered nursery school. Nursery school had some pretty rough days.

“A monster came to our classroom,” said Brian.

“Sure, Brian,” I said.

“It did.A real monster,” said Brian.“Can I come into the hammock with you?”

“Why?” I asked.

Brian climbed in beside me. “I'm scared.”

I thought about pushing him out. But he did look scared. And people my age shouldn't push four-year-olds. “Why are you scared?”

“He followed me home. He's a bad monster.”

I decided to approach this rationally, which had never worked with Brian before, but there was always a first time. “Don't you drive home?” I asked.

“Monsters can follow cars,” said Brian.

“How do you know?”

“Because there he is.”

“Boo!”

Brian screamed and threw himself on me.

I pressed down Brian's shoulder so I could see over it. “Hi, Jack.”

“How did you know it was me?” said Jack.

“Jack?” Brian held on to me tight and peeked around at Jack. “You know a monster by name?”

“He's not a monster,” I said.“Monsters don't say ‘Boo.'”

“What do monsters say?” said Brian.

“Yeah?” said Jack.

“They roar.”

Jack roared.

Brian screamed.

“Cut it out,” I said to both of them. “Anyway, monsters aren't blue.”

“That's what you think,” said Jack.

I examined Jack from head to foot. All his clothes were blue, even his socks. His hair was dyed blue. His hands were blue. Then I got it. “Why are you dressed like Cookie Monster?”

“This is my Halloween costume.”

“Halloween isn't till Sunday,” I said.

“My class did a parade for the nursery school,” said Jack.

“See?” I said to Brian. “There's a simple explanation. Jack is just playing Cookie Monster.”

“Who's Cookie Monster?” said Brian.

I forgot. Brian's mother doesn't have a TV. And she doesn't let him eat junk food. Her usual snack for him is flaxseed sprinkled on prunes. The only cookies she ever serves come from the health food store. They taste like dry cat food. The last time she gave me one, I fed it to Taxi.“Cookie Monster is not someone to worry about,” I said.

“That's not true,” said Jack.“I come into people's houses and eat all their cookies.”

I whispered to Jack,“You don't want the cookies in Brian's house.” Then I said in a regular voice, “He won't go into your house, Brian. So what are you doing here, Jack?”

“I have a problem,” said Jack. “It's a mystery.”

“I'm Sly the Sleuth,” I said quickly. “I run Sleuth for Hire.”

“I know.”

“Did you come to hire me?”

“If you can solve my problem.”

“What's your problem?” I said.

“My fish hates me.”

This sounded kind of wacky, even for Jack. “Go on,” I said.

Jack sat down beside me. Three people on our hammock is a lot. It sagged so much, Brian and I tumbled against Jack.

Brian screamed.

“Cut it out,” I said. “No more screaming. This is just Jack.”

“And I'm sad,” said Jack. “No one should be afraid of a sad monster.”

“Start at the beginning,” I said. That was a line my mother told me detectives always say.

“For my birthday I wished for a fish.”

“I wish for fish every day,” said Brian.

We both looked at Brian. Maybe it was time to send him home.

“Why would you wish for a fish?” I asked Jack. “You already have a cat.”

“I like fish,” said Jack. “So my mother bought me Wish Fish. And he loved me.”

“How do you know?” I asked.

“Well, maybe he didn't love me,” said Jack. “But he didn't hate me. He ignored me. He stayed in his bowl happy as a clam.”

“Are clams happy?” said Brian.

He had a point. Why did people always say clams were happy? Maybe they were depressed. They never did anything fun, after all.

“I don't know,”said Jack,“butWish Fish was happy.”

“How do you know?” said Brian.

“Leave the questions to me,” I said to Brian. “How do you know, Jack?”

“He ate and swam,” said Jack.

That seemed as good a piece of evidence as any.

“So what happened?” I asked.

“It started last night. I stopped by Wish Fish's bowl and he got mad.”

A mad fish? “How could you tell?”

“I just could. And this morning before school he got mad again. Even madder than last night.”

I had to see this fish for myself.

But first, I had to decide: Did I want to take the case?

“Taxi,” I called.

Taxi came running.

“How come your cat always comes when you call?” said Jack.“Ordinary cats only come at mealtime.”

“Taxi's not ordinary,” I said.

I moved Brian to one side and scooped up Taxi. I rubbed my chin on the top of her head. She liked that.

This case was about a fish.Taxi loved to eat fish. And this was a mad fish. Taxi almost never got mad. She'd want to know why a fish was mad. Probably any cat would.

“Take me to Wish Fish,” I said.

Brian went home.

Jack and I walked to his house.

“Well, hello, Sly,” said Jack's mother. “I haven't seen you for a while.”

“Hello, Mrs. Carver. I came to see Jack's fish.”

“How nice. When you're done, come have a snack.” Mrs. Carver went into the kitchen. I was glad. Mrs. Carver made good snacks, like yummy fruit pies. It was too bad Brian couldn't have come with us. He could use some real treats.

“This way,” said Jack. He led me to his room. He stopped in the doorway and pointed.

I looked across the clutter to the fishbowl. It sat on top of a low bureau.The fish inside amazed me.

Wish Fish had a filmy tail that was wider than his body and almost as long. He had three fins: a wide one on his back, a gigantic one on his belly, and a narrow one under his chin that streamed down to two points. All the fins were filmy and long, like that tail.When he turned, his tail and fins flowed around him. It was as though he was dancing in a gauzy veil.

Best of all, he was glowing scarlet.

Wish Fish was beautiful.

I put my face close to his bowl.