Snowballs in Hell (4 page)

Auric seemed distracted when he walked me to work. I didn’t complain too much because as per his habit, he held my hand, an old fashioned gesture that should have never gone out of style. I preferred it when we flew–his gorgeous shadow wings making him seem so much bigger and badder—but he reserved that special treat for late at night when normal people slept. I still hadn’t managed to convince him to have sex while in flight, but I hadn’t given up yet. Too distracting he argued. Bah. I thought the fact we could crash added an element of spice.

“A penny for your thoughts?” I said.

“Hmmm. Nothing. Just thinking about some stuff.”

I hated it when he gave me vague answers. It usually meant he was pulling the overprotective routine. The one that implied that as a female I should be sheltered. Cute, kind of hot, but so annoying because I hated to be kept in the dark. I could have let it bother me, but I knew I’d wheedle it out of him when he was ready. Besides I was pretty sure he was still stuck on the conversation we’d had with my dad earlier.

“So any ideas on who donated my X chromosome?” I asked pleased with my roundabout way of asking about my mother that didn’t cause an instant brain aneurism.

“I’ve been thinking about it since your dad left actually. I’ve got a few ideas, but I want to do some research before I say anything.”

I rolled my eyes. Him and his research. I preferred the more direct approach–shove a sword under someone’s throat and make them talk. Of course, we’d need someone who actually remembered my mother for that to work. Damn, I guess we’d have to rely on his plan to read books.

We reached my work and I yanked my pensive boyfriend into the alcove and planted a big wet one on him. That brought his thoughts back to where they belonged–on me! His hands roamed over my back and slid down to cup my ass. His big hands squeezed my rounded tush and made my breath come faster. I ground my pelvis against his, thinking longingly of the couch in my office in the back. Maybe a quick–.

A whisper of sound behind my back and I found myself neatly stowed away behind Auric’s solid form. I heard the snick of a blade being pulled from a sheath.

“Would you put that thing away?” I hissed in his ear. “It’s still broad daylight.”

“And Charon should know better than to sneak up on us?” growled Auric, sliding his blade back home. I knew another blade that wouldn’t be getting slid home now though–

sigh.

I heard Charon chuckle, the sound floating out from the dark recesses of his hood. I felt a little shiver of fear, one that pissed me off since I’d known Charon forever as he was an old friend of my father’s; furthermore, I knew he had nothing to do with the other hooded stranger.

“I need a drink. Bad,” said Charon, the ferryman of death. “My son somehow managed to put a hole in my boat, so it’s in the shop being repaired. I’ve got the night off, but I’ll be working twice as hard tomorrow bringing the damned down the river.” I choked my giggle back. A month back Charon’s son had dropped the oar in the river Styx and stranded his passengers–the new damned souls for Hell. Poor Charon, I was beginning to get the impression his son would not be following in his shoes–er robe.

With a final quick peck, Auric left, possibly off on some mysterious good deed to help rid the world of evil, a quirk of his that drove my dad batty. I thought it was cute.

I unlocked the bar and ushered Charon into the Nexus, flicking on the light switches.

“Auric seemed a bit jumpy back there? Did something happen?” Charon seated himself at the bar.

“Bah, I was attacked by a couple of demons yesterday, so now he’s gone all overprotective on me.”

Charon chuckled. “Give him time, Muriel. Don’t forget, it’s not every woman who can confront demons without bursting into tears.” I knew I should cut Auric some slack, but dammit, I thought we’d gotten past all that macho shit. Could you tell I wasn’t too happy with Auric? A truly smart boyfriend, sensing my horniness when he kissed me at the door would not have rushed off with an abysmal excuse for a kiss. No, a true lover would have swept me off my feet and taken me out back for a thorough fuck.

He’d better make it up to me tonight or heads–and I do mean both of them—will roll.

I served Charon a mug of frothing Hell brew, not a drink for the uninitiated. I bustled around, work keeping me busy for the next few hours. But when my sister, Bambi, walked in, I handed over the bar to Percy and beckoned her to follow me out back to my office.

The door shut from prying ears, I plopped onto the couch I kept in there while she perched on my desk, her micro mini skirt riding up and advertising the fact she wore no panties and had shaved.

I averted my eyes. “Hey, sis, mind crossing your legs? There are some things a girl just doesn’t need to see.”

Bambi giggled. “Sorry, little lamb, I just got off work. It was a most fulfilling night.” Bambi was a succubus, which, in a nutshell, meant she had sex with guys and sucked at their life force while doing it. Kind of gross, but I loved her anyway. She’d found the perfect job to keep her fed as a feature exotic dancer, and she did it well, drawing in huge crowds.

“Can I ask you something?” I asked my older, and while perhaps not wiser, more male experienced sister.

“You can ask me anything, you know that, lamb. What’s up? Your man want you to do something kinky? Tie you up maybe? Spank you?” She recited off a number of naughty things, some which I’d never even heard of, but I’d definitely look them up for future reference.

“No, it’s not about sex. It’s this whole overprotective crap. How do I make him see I can take care of myself?”

“You can’t,” she said, turning serious.

“What? But he wants me to have someone with me whenever I leave the house just because some demons attacked me.”

Bambi rolled her eyes. “Oh, excuse me. How dare he love you so much that he’d try to keep you safe? What a jerk. I say we kill him.” My cheeks burned as she mocked me. “So, what, you think I should just let this slide?”

“Lamb, that man loves you. After what happened last month, can you blame him for wanting to be cautious? And really, what’s the big deal?” Put like that, it made me sound like I was making a mountain out a mole hill. Bloody hell. I hated being wrong.

“Thanks, sis.”

“Anytime, lamb. Now if you don’t mind, I hear my favorite song playing.” With a swish of her hips, Bambi opened my office door and sashayed out to the musical beat of Salt-N-Pepa’s, “Push It”.

Gotta love the 80's.

* * * *

the way his shaggy blond hair always fell in a tousled mess around his vividly blue eyes.

I might have noticed the way his white t-shirt hugged the slim, muscled physique of his upper body and the way his lean waist and long legs filled out the tight fitting jeans he wore nicely. I only barely noticed those types of things anymore. Damn, I was becoming an awesome liar, even to myself.

“Hey, David,” I called out. “Where’s Auric?”

“He and Christopher got hung up, so they sent me to walk you home.” I rolled my eyes. “They do realize I’m a grown woman, right?”

“I’m just doing what they asked me,” he said holding his hands up in surrender.

David was such a pussy cat, literally. He might seem shy and boyish, but that lasted only until he shapeshifted into a blond panther of incredible agility and strength. Once that happened, watch out, because kitty had claws.

“You can tell them you tried. Go home and get some sleep. Or even better, find yourself a hot little thing and get laid.” Being blissfully happy and sexually sated most of the time, I now believed everyone should be in the same state.

David shrugged then shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t know any girls. And besides, I can’t leave. I said I would walk you home, and Auric will freak if I don’t.”

“David, David, David,” I chided. “You and I both know you can’t make me do anything.”

“Auric said you’d say that and he told me to tell you, um–.” David blushed, a trait about him that I found superbly cute given his deadly shapeshifter alter ego. “He’s the man in this relationship and if he says you need an escort to walk you home that you’d better listen, or you will be punished.”

I laughed. Didn’t Auric know by now I looked forward to his punishments? The last time he’d made me scream for hours on end, and when I’d cum, I’d coasted on the power high for days afterward, not to mention I’d orgasmed so copiously we’d had to change the sheets.

“Tell you what, I’ll let you walk me home if you promise to tell him just how bad I was about it.”

David looked confused.

I sighed and spelled it out for him. “I want him to punish me David. I really,
really
like it when he does, if you know what I mean.”

David flushed even brighter and I laughed. But then with more backbone than I would have assumed, he blurted out. “He said if you didn’t listen, he wouldn’t let you play with him tonight, and he’d play with himself in front of you instead.” I gaped at David. I couldn’t believe Auric had threatened that, let alone that David had repeated it.

“Do you like to watch?” asked David, meeting my eyes briefly before ducking his head again while I still stood there tongue tied.

His question surprised me, as did the flushed look on his face. Peering unobtrusively down, I could see his face wasn’t the only thing flushing with blood. “I–um.” I know, me, embarrassed. It seemed strange, but while I didn’t mind flirting and tossing out the sexual innuendoes and jokes, it seemed a little wrong to do so when David so obviously found it titillating. “You’ll have to ask Auric,” I said primly, but even as I said that, I had an image of David watching me and Auric fucking while he stroked himself. Damn, were my panties wet!

I locked the bar up tight before heading back to the loft I shared with Auric. David walked beside me, hands stuffed in his pockets, staring down at the ground. His shy demeanor and easy blushes brought out my devilish side– blame my father, it was his DNA that made me do it—so I couldn’t help myself, I had to ask. “David, do you like to watch?”

He just nodded his head, not looking at me.

“Have you ever watched Auric?” It didn’t seem like the type of thing Auric was into, but then again, you never knew. He and David were pretty close.

I could see David’s cheeks pinken and again he nodded yes. I admit–I found this concept highly titillating. A voyeur, damn that made me wetter, not that I was looking for an audience—yet.

“Did Auric know you were watching?” Apparently I’d have to wait for that answer as David heard the whisper of sound a second before I did, and we both smelt the tang of Hell. Demon time.

We’d no sooner smelled the brimstone than David’s body rippled, his clothes shredding from his lanky frame as the kitty nestled inside him burst free. Gross, yet at the same time kind of hot. I, for my part, palmed two silver daggers and prepared to invoke the magic that would cause them to burn with Hellfire.

A guttural chuckle sounded from the depths of a dark alley and David, now a hulking, golden panther spun to face it, snarling. His muzzle drew back over very large canines.

I snarled myself when I saw who the shadows hid. “Azazel! You cowardly slug. Still hiding in shadows are you?”

“Lucifer’s daughter,” spat back the large black demon that came into view. “Soon, you’ll be screaming my name when I make you my concubine.” Before he’d turned traitor, Azazel had been one of my father’s most trusted commanders and he’d also fancied himself my suitor. Only one problem–I never could stand him. Apparently he still had fantasies about me though, fantasies that would get him castrated if he didn’t leave me alone.

“Get yourself a pocket pussy if you’re that hard up.” Yeah, I knew I was inciting the whole tail pulling thing. What could I say, I thrived on danger.

“Bitch, you’ll rue your words when you are mine.”

“Bring it on, little man–and I mean little,” I taunted him some more.

Azazel roared, his black eyes glowed with fury and his fangs dripped a mixture of venom and drool. But my father was Satan. I’d grown up with a hell of a lot worse, so I yawned. “Do you mind? I’ve got a left over pizza at home with my name on it.” Azazel lowered his voice menacingly. “My
master
,” I pretended I didn’t feel myself flinch at the word. “Is looking forward to seeing you. He said to tell you when winter arrives, he’ll be waiting for you by the furnace.” I blinked. “Say what? What the hell is it with you bad guys and your cryptic messages? Did it never occur to you that you should give me, like, an actual date and time? I mean, what if I’ve got a hair appointment scheduled that day or a tanning session?

And how come you get to pick the location? You guys chose it last time. I think it should my turn this time?” I babbled trying to fight the panic that kept trying to push itself up past my gorge.
Don’t let the master come back. Don’t let the master touch me.
I just knew if I shut up, I’d start screaming. “You know what, you tell that piece of shit coward the next time he wants to talk to me, he can make a fucking appointment. I’m through playing your fucking games. David, eat the giant rat.” With a growl I swear sounded happy, David pounced, knocking a surprised Azazel to the ground. The big demon unfortunately possessed superior strength though and sent my kitty flying. Eight lives left.

“You’ll pay for that, Satan’s child,” Azazel threatened. A curse marred by the blood dripping down his face. I stuck my tongue out at him. With a cry of rage, Azazel called a portal and jumped through just as David came bounding back. At that moment I couldn’t have told you who was the bigger pussy.

“Good kitty,” I said rubbing David’s big furry head behind the ears, an action that was rewarded with purring on the sound level of an air craft carrier taking off. “Come on, let’s get back to my place so we can find you some clothes.” I somehow doubted the remnants littering the ground would cover any important parts and I knew I was too curious to look away. Shapeshifters must have one hell of a clothing budget, on par with the Hulk’s.