Somebody to Love: Sigh With Contentment, Scream With Frustration. At Time You Will Weep. (36 page)

Was he all right? Donna worried as she trailed after them. Granted, he might not know about Jody’s situation, but he must surely have got one of the five million messages Donna had left him.

Perhaps he really was pulling away now he’d helped her put her house back in order. She really couldn’t blame him. A mortifying image of herself being sick in the bathroom wearing fishnets and polystyrene cups, flashed through her mind, and she wondered what man in his right mind wouldn’t run a mile?

****

Mark shook his head, sure he’d rung the wrong number. ‘Evelyn?’ he asked, confused.

‘Well I was when I last looked, though you’d never think so to listen to your father. If he calls me Hyacinth Bucket again, I may do something —’

‘Evelyn,’ Mark cut her short, ‘where are you?’

‘Standing talking to you on the phone, dear boy.’

‘I must have rung the wrong number.’ Mark shook his head again. ‘I’d better go, Evelyn. I meant to phone home.’

‘You have. Well done, ET.’

Mark held the receiver away from his ear and looked at it askew. ‘Sorry?’

‘I’m at your house, Mark. This is why I am answering your phone. Where else would I be when my daughter had to bring your abandoned son home and needed your father’s key?’

‘Donna?’ Mark really was confused now.

‘Yes, Donna. The one whose bedroom you were in throwing your weight around, remember?’

‘Evelyn, I remember, trust me. Now, I appreciate you’d be concerned for Donna and want to fight her corner, but can we fight later? I’m in a phone box and I really need to talk to her.’

‘You can’t,’ Evelyn informed him shortly. ‘She’s putting Karl to bed.’

Bed?
Jesus
, did Donna realise that Karl would need to go through his rituals before he got into bed? More so, without Starbuck. What in God’s name was going on? The one day he forgets his mobile and all hell breaks loose.

‘Okay, look, I don’t have my mobile, Evelyn. If Donna needs me, tell her I’m on my way.’

‘I’m sure she does need you. If she wasn’t busy trying to be so independent, she might…’

Mark left Evelyn talking to herself and ran back to his car, knowing he’d be too late to avert a crisis if there was one. Maybe Donna could cope. She’d been working at the respite home, after all, and he didn’t need Dr Lewis to tell him how competent she was. But Donna was not built like a Gladiator. And that’s the kind of strength sometimes needed to hold Karl until he calmed down.

Evelyn was there, though. And his dad. Mark tried to calm himself, glancing over to the backseat, seeing Starbuck still flat out there and reminding himself to drive sensibly. What had happened with Jody? He hoped to God she was okay. Why hadn’t he given her the vet’s contact number, for Christ’s sake? Because he hadn’t envisaged complications. The sort that you sometimes can’t avoid.

Starbuck had needed major surgery, but he’d pulled through. That was something to be hugely grateful for. Whatever mayhem broke loose today, at least Karl and he might be able to get back to some sort of normality tomorrow.

****

Evelyn flapped a hand, shushing him before he was through the door. Mark glanced past her as she pointed to the lounge, then did a double-take as he saw Matt in the hall.

‘Crisis averted,’ Matt said immediately, obviously noting Mark’s apprehension. ‘Karl’s kipping on the lounge floor.’

Mark raked his hand through his hair, disbelieving. He had to be kidding.

He walked quietly to the lounge door to see for himself, then, ‘Bloody Hell!’ he was flabbergasted at what he did see. Karl was fast asleep, comfortably tucked under his duvet, another underneath him, and Sadie right beside him.

Jesus.
‘How?’ he asked quietly, stepping away from the door before he disturbed them.

‘Um, well he just sort of lay down, shut his eyes and… Actually it wasn’t quite that simple,’ Matt admitted as Mark stared at him, incredulous. ‘I now have my watching
Fireman Sam
badge and mum has a black eye…’

‘A… What?’ Mark paled.

‘Relax. She’s tougher than you think. S’why you’d betta not mess wit her, yo?’

‘What happened?’ Mark asked, as if he didn’t know.

Matt got back to serious. ‘Well, he did four circuits of the stairs, landing and the bedroom. Then he just threw a wobbly. Not sure what caused it.’

‘Was the bathroom occupied?’ Mark asked.

‘Not sure. Why?’

‘Has to flush the loo, then flick the landing light before he can… Long story.’

‘Got you.’ Matt nodded, seeming to understand. ‘Anyhow, Mum got him in a bear-hug eventually and managed to convince him Sadie wasn’t feeling well after all the trips upstairs with her one front leg, so…’

Karl went back down to the dog. Mark got it. Because he didn’t want Sadie going away like Starbuck had, who also wasn’t feeling well.

Mark ran his hand over his neck, disbelieving, astonished, but above all, jubilant. Did Donna have any idea what she’d done? Widened Karl’s scope to accept the abstract? Opened his mind further to the fact that things from the same family tree didn’t necessarily come in the same packaging. Starbuck was a dog. Sadie was a dog. Simple. Not in Karl’s mind: one with four legs, one with three.

As for getting Karl to break with exhausting ritual: to sleep somewhere different. To most people it might not amount to much. Their kid was camping out. No big deal. To Mark, to Karl, it meant, quite literally, that the shackles were off. That for the first time in his life, his son might be able to go on holiday, to feel the sand between his toes, to paddle in the sea.

‘I, er…’ Mark glanced down, sucked in a breath, blew it out, and still he couldn’t speak. ‘Your mum’s definitely special, you know that, don’t you?’ he finally managed.

‘Definitely, but in a good way,’ Matt conceded as Donna appeared from the kitchen, a frozen haddock over one eye.

‘Hi.’ Donna smiled hesitantly when she saw Mark. ‘Um, Robert,’ she explained the presence of fish on her face. ‘He’s trying to bring my swelling down. Hope this wasn’t your supper.’

‘I don’t mind sharing.’ Mark laughed. ‘Just be careful where you put the tartar sauce though.’ His eyes drifted involuntarily to her lips.

Donna blushed the way she did. And every time she did, it melted Mark’s heart just a little bit more. ‘And be careful you don’t defrost all over your blouse,’ he said, stepping towards her to ease a loose tendril of hair from under her haddock.

‘I brought Karl home,’ Donna explained, looking at him with one uncertain pretty green eye, even now, looking nervous up close to him.

Mark wished she wouldn’t be. ‘I gathered.’ He smiled, mesmerised for a moment, and more in love with this woman who managed to look sexy even with a frozen fish on her face, than he thought he could ever be. ‘What did you do, drug him?’

‘No!’ Donna’s fish slipped.

‘Ouch.’ Mark winced. ‘I’m joking, Donna.’ He trailed a thumb gently over her bruised cheek. ‘And I’m truly grateful. You might not realise it, but what you’ve done, persuading Karl to step out of the norm, sleep anywhere but where he’s used to, is nothing short of a miracle.’

‘Oh, it was nothing.’ Donna blushed again, pleased with herself this time. ‘I’ve got another eye on the other side, see?’ She pointed, and smiled.

Which had Mark smiling right down to his shoes.

‘Jody obviously wasn’t in a position to with her mum being ill, and it really wasn’t too much trouble once the troops were organised.’ Donna nodded to the kitchen where Evelyn and Robert were arguing in whispers.

‘I assumed you might have been detained with Starbuck, so I left another message on your mobile. Did you get any of my, um…’

Donna trailed off as Mark muttered, ‘Starbuck!
Shit
, I left him in the car,’ and shot out of the door.

Chapter Twenty-Four

It’ll be fine
, Donna told herself again as she selected her best, clean and pressed — bless Mark’s thoughtfulness — lingerie. Nothing risqué, she decided, racy and lacy not being suitable for the hospital.

No word from Mark. She peered at her mobile whilst applying enough make-up for a brave face, hoping it might flash up a message. Nothing, which meant either he didn’t get the bare-all message she’d left, or he had, and wasn’t returning her calls by way of his answer.

She wished she’d had a chance to speak to him alone, to ask him outright what he’d meant by
I care very much about you, but…
That had been impossible though, with all the excitement when he’d brought Starbuck into the hall.

Poor Starbuck. They’d had to take a little bit of his intestine away, apparently. And now he was going to be on water and antibiotics, followed by bland food for a while. Donna had offered to help. Mark had smiled and said he’d ring her. But he hadn’t; so, even without her odd million messages, that added up to him not wanting to pursue things. Didn’t it?

Stop it.
Donna selected sensible outer attire to match her sensible drawers and told herself not to be silly. Mark’s smile had been his usual twinkly-eyed one — Donna’s heart fluttered hopefully — so if he had decided her
no complications
stipulation was just too complicated, at least it meant they were still friends, which was… absolutely no good at all when Donna’s inclination was to get good and complicated with him, in any and all compromising positions.

‘Do you think he’d notice, hon,’ she plopped despondently down on the bed next to Sadie, who with her snout and front paw hanging over the edge of the bed, looked to be missing Mark too, ‘if I whipped off his shirt and just bit him next time I saw him?’

Donna glanced down as Sadie glanced up, showing the whites of her chocolate brown eyes. ‘No, you’re right, babe.’ She sighed. ‘Probably would be a touch on the excessive side.’

Oh, well. It was her own fault. Drive a man away hard enough and he’d go, she supposed. ‘I wished I hadn’t, Sade. That I was brave enough to pick up the phone and say, make mad passionate love to me.’

To Mark obviously, Donna added a mental addendum.

Ask him to just love her.

As she loved him.

No complications.

****

She would call him. She didn’t like the loneliness of being alone… without Mark. Just as soon as she got back from the hospital she would ring him, depending on when she got back, and whether she got back in one piece.

It occurred to Donna on the way there to extract her head from sand and concern herself about bits of her body other than her heart. She hadn’t really had time to think much about her appointment, which was probably a good thing, but now she was almost there. She’d be absolutely fine, she assured herself, popping her head back in the sand.

Donna checked her watch twenty minutes later and strained her ears in hopes of hearing Alicia arrive. She wasn’t feeling quite so fine, after all, Donna realised. Very un-fine, in fact.

Where on earth was she? Alicia had said she’d be here, though Donna had tried to wave away her sister’s concerns, whilst wondering how she’d found out about the appointment, other than by telepathy.

Not by mind-reading. By
letter
-reading, Alicia had told her, sounding rather miffed when she’d rung. The letter on top of the microwave Donna hadn’t bothered to mention, she’d pointed out, and then insisted on meeting her here. Donna had been quietly relieved, whilst telling herself there was no need. Now, she was terrified, and there was every need.

She wanted a hand to hold. What was she doing here, alone? The last time she’d been on her own in a hospital, she’d left empty-handed and broken-hearted, so why on earth had she imagined she could cope on her own, again?

Because she’d had to before.

Because she’d thought she should be able to this time.

Would Mark have been here, she wondered, if things had moved on? If she’d let them move on… enough to confide in him. To ask him to be.

Donna’s heart answered for her.
You’re a fool, Donna O’Connor. The man tried. But you just kept pushing. I care very much about you, but…
I can’t do this, was what Mark had been going to say. She just knew it.

Donna sighed down to her soul, willing herself to stay on the trolley as she heard the consultant coming back, though she actually felt like squeezing out of the open window above her.

‘Well, we’re all fixed up,’ Mr Williams said, smiling warmly as he came back into the examination room. ‘If you’d like to pop your things back on, the nurse will take you along for your biopsy. Don’t want you getting lost, do we?’

Yes we do.
Biopsy
!? He called it a
fine needle aspiration
five minutes ago. Donna much preferred the former, less scary description.

‘I think we’re dealing with a non-carcinogenic fibroadenoma,’ Mr Williams went on, nodding reassuringly.

Donna didn’t feel very reassured somehow. Talk English, she wanted to shout. She really had no idea what he was talking about.

She didn’t need to. Her face must have spoken volumes. Mr Williams smiled again, seated himself on the end of the trolley and set about explaining in simple layman’s language. ‘A benign lump,’ he said. ‘Nothing to worry about, but until we’ve removed a sample, we can’t be sure. That’s where the biopsy comes in.’

‘It’s a very simple procedure and quite painless,’ he assured her. ‘You’ll have a local anaesthetic, then a needle will be inserted in order to extract a few cells.’

Painless?
Donna looked at him, unconvinced.

‘The good news is, the results should only take about thirty to forty minutes. Is that all right for you?’

‘Fine.’ Donna finally offered him a smile. Then smiled at the nurse, because the nurse was smiling at her, but she really didn’t feel like smiling at all.

‘Don’t worry, it might look a bit daunting, but it really is a simple procedure,’ the nurse assured her, helped Donna sort herself out, then led her off to the cytology department.

‘Dr Smith’s ever so sweet, so don’t feel intimidated,’ she said, once they’d arrived, obviously noticing Donna was about to disappear into her shoes.

Donna nodded and tugged up her shoulders.