âWhat if she turned up now?'
âI don't know where she is or what her circumstances are, which means I have no idea whether to expect to see her or not.'
Roza yawned. âAh, you'll never see her again.'
âI didn't tell you . . .' He paused, debating whether to go on. âWhen I said she disappeared, I meant she
actually
disappeared, from her work, her house, everything. I got the idea something bad might have happened to her.'
âWhy?'
âBecause she vanished suddenly, after I'd told her I couldn't see her any more. No one at her work knew where she'd gone. Her house was just empty one day, with stuff left behind. I was glad she was gone. But at the same time I thought, if something bad's happened, then people might start looking for her.'
âAnd then they might find you.'
âExactly.'
âBut you've done nothing wrong.'
âNothing wrong! What about cheating on my wife?'
âOh well, there's that.' She was thoughtful now, studying his expression. âYou must have looked for her, to know she was gone.'
âI went back one more time.'
âWhy?'
âI felt sorry for her.'
âYou could try to find out where she is.'
âThe last thing I want to do is find
her.'
âBut do you think it might be a good idea to try? So you're sort of forewarned?'
âNo. I don't think so.'
He still couldn't bring himself to mention the phone call from the stranger.
Roza said, âThere are some things in my past â I suppose this might be so with lots of people â where I don't know what really happened. I was in such a hurry to move on and change my life that there are quite a few lost threads. Not knowing and not finding out is part of moving on. But still, you think about it sometimes; there are these narratives that were cut off, questions you'll never answer.'
âBest to keep going forward.'
âJust so long as nothing happens to drag you back.'
He said, âAre you trying to torture me?'
âWhat do you mean?'
âNothing.'
Weeks. Arthur Weeks . . .
She went on, âStill, some people would say
I
disappeared. And I didn't want to be found. Your friend might be the same.'
âMaybe. We'd better go down. They'll wonder what we're doing.'
âOne more thing. You say you were depressed.'
âI was working too hard. Arguments at home. Nothing interesting.'
âIs that the only reason?'
âWell, I'd met you, and I couldn't work out what it was about you that I recognised. It was because you resembled Elke, but I didn't think of that at first. You must admit, it was a weird situation.'
âYou used to sort of stare at me,' she said.
âI was trying to work it out.'
âYou used to stare as if you had a crush. David noticed.'
He said coldly, âSorry about that. But like I said, it was a strange situation.'
âYou used to stare at Elke, too.'
Her eyes were very bright.
âIs that right? And now
David
stares at her.'
She blinked. âOnly because she looks like Johnnie.'
âBut he looks right through Claire.'
There was a hard silence between them. Then she smiled, âWe're friends because we can talk about things like this. We shouldn't have any secrets between us. Promise?' She leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek.
He closed his eyes. âYes, sure.'
But what was he promising?
Weeks
Simon made a resolution: he would work on his mental health. He went for a long run out to the Kauri Lake, lay by the pool with his novel, and made sure he didn't drink too much in the evening. He played some strenuous games of tennis with Marcus, which knackered him more than he admitted to the boy, although they were fairly evenly matched. Like Roza, he would try to find a way to live. To look after the body was the plan â look after the body and the mind will improve.
Instead of getting out of bed at dawn he tried to sleep in, and his tossing and turning woke Karen and led to a satisfactory encounter there in the tousled bed, with the early light shining through the slatted blinds of the Little House and the tuis warbling in the trees outside.
Afterwards they lay in the striped light. Karen said, âDavid's got himself a personal trainer.'
âWhat about Garth?'
âGarth's Roza's. You've got to have your own, or it's not personal. David's hired one called Dean. He came yesterday.'
âWhat, in a crate I suppose.'
âHe took David for a full session. Weights. Running.'
Simon yawned and stretched. âHe'll have to go easy. David never does any exercise at all.'
Karen said, âHe's written David a programme, and told him what they need to work on. And he said David specially needs . . .' She pressed her lips together.
âWhat?'
âHe said he needs a bigger bum.'
âA bigger bum?'
âBigger muscles there, I suppose. Anyway, he has plans to enlarge it somehow.'
âAre there special exercises?'
Karen snorted, âGarth, on the other hand, is working on making Roza's bum smaller.'
âMm. Meanwhile, does David actually
want
a bigger bum?'
They lazed about until it got too hot, and then wandered down to the beach. Simon thought, It's good to slow down. To live in the moment . . .
It was a fine, hot day, with no wind and the waves breaking evenly along the shore. They swam out and looked back at the Wedding Cake, its glass windows reflecting the sea. The flag hung limp on its pole. A convoy of cars was making its way along the coast road.
After the swim, Karen went off with Roza, Juliet, Sharon and Ray to a café in the town centre and he wandered up to change. At the Little House his cell phone was signalling a missed call. There was no message. He checked; it was the number of the stranger who'd asked about Mereana.
If he ignored the calls, the man might give up. But would he start asking questions elsewhere?
He retrieved the number from his call log and rang it.
âIt's Simon Lampton,' he said. âYou rang me?'
âDr Lampton. Thanks for calling back,' Arthur Weeks said. âI wanted to ask you about Mereana Kostas.'
âI'm sorry, I'm not in my office at the moment. What was the name?'
âMereana Kostas. I think you know her.'
âI don't. What's this about?'
âI thought you knew her.'
âNo, I don't know anyone of that name, unless she's a patient, but I have hundreds and of course I'd need to know what you . . . ?'
âShe's not a patient.'
âI don't know her.'
âCan I meet you?'
âWhat for?'
âYour number's in her cell phone, listed under “Simon”.'
Simon ducked, involuntarily. He waited, then said, âWell, she might have been a patient at some stage, but I can't discuss patients obviously.'
âI'm trying to find her address.'
âCan't help, sorry.'
âThere's a photo of you in her phone.'
Silence.
âA photo . . . How do you know what I look like?'
âGoogle Images. In the picture you're laughing and reaching towards the camera. You look happy.'
Simon closed his eyes. âHow do you come to have this person's cell phone?'
âShe left it behind. Can I meet you?'
âBut why? What's your interest? Who are you?'
âI'm a journalist, and I guess a film-maker.'
âChrist,' Simon said.
âI could give you the phone.'
âWhy would I want it? I don't . . . I don't . . . Oh . . . I suppose . . .' Another silence. âYou could give me the phone? But I have no interest . . . I'll be at my rooms later today, I have a clinic. But there's no point, since I don't know anything.'
Weeks said, âGreat. I'll see you then.' He hung up.
Simon washed his face. He raised his head and looked in the mirror. Every year that had passed since he'd last seen Mereana had made him feel safer, more sure that he would never hear from her again. But this didn't need to be complicated. All he had to do was deny knowing her, get the guy to give him the phone and then throw it away.
On his way to the car he met Roza dressed for the pool in a towel and flip-flops, with a pair of sporty goggles on her head. Behind her came Tuleimoka and Johnnie, hand in hand.
âHello,' she said. âKaren tells me you're mentally ill.'
âShe's spreading it around, is she?'
âAnd that
she's
completely sane.'
âShe's thrilled to imagine that I'm nuts.'
âWell, take care of yourself. You're on a knife edge.'
âThanks, darling.'
âHurry back!' She kissed his cheek. âTake your medication.' She turned to frown at Tuleimoka, who was now instructing Johnnie on the importance of wearing shoes.
âWe didn't get up early enough,' she whispered. âNow we've got the Priestess in tow.'
âPecause in the ground, in the tirt, there are tirty things,' Tuleimoka was saying.
âOh, for God's sake.' Roza rolled her eyes. âIs it only for the day? Do hurry back.'
He drove south until the city appeared ahead of him, its blocks and spikes ranged against the cloudless blue. Crossing the bridge he looked down at the marina, at the hundreds of white-rigged masts jinking and clinking in the breeze. He liked the alien quality of the city during the few weeks of summer holiday, when the streets and buildings became a hot, empty, concrete landscape â a different place.
The radio played him the news, a string of curiosities from far away: extreme cold weather had damaged pipes in Ireland, leaving thousands of people without running water; Israeli rabbis' wives had issued a public letter warning Israeli women not to form relationships with Arab men â such marriages would lead to beatings and humiliation, they advised . . .
He headed straight for the surgery, stopping to talk to his receptionist Clarice before shutting himself in his office, turning on the computer and looking out at the park, its grass all brown and withered after the long, hot summer.
Having got the idea from the stranger himself, he Googled âArthur Weeks' and found Weeks was a freelance writer and film-maker who'd made a trio of short films called
The Present.
He ran through a review of the films, and a posting by a blogger called Stars-In-Her-Eyes, who said they'd âdone nothing for her'. Weeks had also written a comic play about Captain Cook, it seemed, and some episodes for a local television drama. He consulted Google Images and found Arthur Weeks to be young and handsome, with dark, wavy hair, a wide mouth, an angular face and small, keen eyes. None of this helped. He tidied his desk. So much for improving his mental health â he had a stress headache.
His clinic was soon behind schedule. A young woman sat in his room with her six-week-old baby in a car seat at her feet. Her clothes were expensive and immaculate but her face was expressionless, dark circles like bruises under her eyes. He vaguely remembered the baby's birth; checked his notes for its sex, which wasn't obvious.
âHow's it going?' he asked, jovial. âHe letting you get any sleep?'
âNo.' She didn't look at the baby. âHe cries and whines all night.'
âThey settle down after a while. Have you got yourself some advice?'
âThey all tell me different things. Nothing works.'
âSo . . . you might be feeling a little bit tired, a bit down?'
âNo.'
âOh good. That's the spirit.'
âMostly I feel nothing.'
âAh.'
âDo you remember my husband, from the birth?' She gestured at the baby, angry. âHe looks just like him. Same hair. See those black tufts, how thick they are already? They're not soft like baby hair.' Her face wrinkled with disgust.
âRight. I see . . .'
Shall we say moderately mentally ill?
He made a series of notes, glancing down at the baby, which balled its tiny hands and began to wail. The woman looked out the window and he went about making notes for a referral while the poor, unwanted kid screamed itself hoarse and the mother sat barely moving, with her numb, glassy stare.
He said gently, âTry picking him up.'
âIt won't do anything.'
He touched her sleeve. Her eyes were dark, strange, empty.
âJust try,' he said again. He smiled, tried to will life into her eyes.
Lunchtime, he went out for a sandwich at the café down the road. A young man came in after him, called out his name, offered his hand.
âArthur Weeks. Hi,' he said. âBuy you a coffee?'
Simon nodded and sat down. The young man ordered coffees, came back, stumbled against a chair, seemed at a loss for a moment. He sat down, coughed. âSo. It's about Mereana.'
âI don't know anything.'
The man looked sharp. âYou don't know anything, but do you know
her
?'
Simon leaned back, touching his fingertips together. âNo. Why don't you tell me about this person.'
âI've known her since I was a kid.'
Simon straightened up. âReally?'
âYou're surprised!'
âNot at all.' It was too hot in the café. âCould we get to the point, please? I have a lot of work on today.'
âMy parents had a holiday bach next to her father's land up north. We used to go every summer, and she'd be there, and we'd play on the beach, swim, go fishing. Her father was Greek; he came from Australia and married into a Maori family. They own a lot of land, including beaches, and we all used to mix every year, the Pakeha families like ours, and theirs.'
âI see.'
âSo I was there this summer, and they asked me to look up Mereana when I went back to Auckland. Her parents are dead, but the rest of the family, especially these old women, these matriarch types, have wondered where she is. They never go to Auckland, so they see me as a connection. They invited me in for a cup of tea and talked about it. They suggested I drop in on an old friend of hers, a guy called Lydon, who lives in Whangarei, to see if he knew her address.
âI went to his place on my way back to Auckland. He said she'd disappeared, but that she'd left one of her phones, and he still had it. We looked through it and he knew most of the numbers, but there was yours. I rang it and got a phone message â it said the number had changed, but it gave a new number, which was the one I called you on.'
Simon cleared his throat. âThe message probably listed my number by mistake.'
âBut there's the photo of you.'
âAs I said, she may have been a patient, but if she was, I can't discuss her. I do make my cell phone number available to some patients, given the nature of my work.'
âCan you check if she was a patient?'
âNo. And even if I did, which I won't and can't, it wouldn't locate her, would it?'
âYou're an obstetrician. Was she pregnant?'
âOh, come on.'
âSorry â no, don't get up; I know I can't ask that. But you must admit it's strange she had a photo of you.'
âPerhaps she got it off the internet. Sometimes patients form attachments . . .' Simon felt heat rising to his face. He looked away, ashamed.
âLike a stalker? Like she was fixated on you?'
He stood up. âThis is not appropriate. I don't know this person, couldn't discuss her if I did, and I can't see what's to be gained by this.'
âBut the photo's not like a press picture off the internet; it's intimate, taken by a friend. The expression, the laugh.'
Simon said, without knowing whether this was possible, âPerhaps she got it off someone's Facebook page.'
âThe picture must have been taken by the camera in the phone.'
Simon's anger was increasing. âLet's have a look at it then,' he said.
Weeks hesitated, then took a Nokia out of his pocket. He brought up the number in the contacts, listed under Simon, and then he held up the picture of Simon laughing and reaching towards the camera, wearing a business shirt and no tie. Behind him was a wall with the weatherboards partly exposed and a blind with sunlight shafting through it, and below it on a windowsill a cigarette packet and a beer can.
She must have held up the phone and pointed at him and he'd reached for it and pulled it off her, not realising she'd taken a shot.
He looked; he was silenced. It was impossible to explain away that background â the beer can and the cigarette packet and the weatherboards and the shabby blind. Anyone who knew him would see it was not his house, and not the kind of house his friends owned. He was back in the room with the afternoon sun and Mereana lying on the couch with her feet propped up, swigging on her beer, teasing him.
âHer friend Lydon told me that's her house in the picture.'
Simon reached, but Weeks pulled away.
âYou said you'd give it to me.'
Weeks put the phone in his pocket. He held up his hands. âShow it. I said I'd show it to you.'
âYou said you'd
give
it. That's why I agreed to meet you.'
There was a silence. Simon considered wrenching open the jacket and grabbing the phone, but it was impossible, the café was full of people.