Soul Love (18 page)

Mia ran over to hug me. ‘That was so brave, girlfriend!’ she cooed.

‘Are you all right, Jenna?’ Charlie asked, sounding genuinely concerned.

‘I’m fine, Charlie,’ I said. Gabe and the others were nowhere to be seen.

‘You’re crazy, risking your neck for a stupid cat,’ Jackson said.

‘Tallulah. What kind of weird name is that?’ Rebecca added.

‘Charlie! How nice to meet you. Jenna has told me all about you,’ Mia exclaimed, fluttering her eyelashes at a bemused Charlie.

‘Have you got something in your eye?’ he asked her, pulling out a grubby tissue from his pocket. ‘If you have, I can help you out.’

I spotted Mum standing behind them.

‘Where’s Tallulah?’ I asked.

‘Sarah and Aurora have taken her over to the house, Gabe thinks they’ve got a cat basket somewhere.’

I suddenly remembered Curio, her little cat that lived in the treehouse. What had happened to him?

Mum took me by the arm and led me away from the others.

‘I didn’t invite her, Mum!’

What was it about me that made everyone jump to the wrong conclusion?

Chapter Thirty-Five

I
turned and ran across the field as quickly as possible. I had a real job on my hands to convince the security
guards standing by the entrance to Netherby Hall to let me in.

‘The hall is out of bounds,’ one of them said as he crossed his arms in front of his massive torso.

‘I’m with the group of people who just came in with the cat,’ I insisted, showing them the scratches on my arm.

They phoned the hall and eventually I was allowed in.

Everyone was gathered round the kitchen table. On the far end of the table was the most elaborate cat basket I’d ever seen. It was like a miniature version of Netherby Hall made out of
wicker. Tallulah meowed at me.

‘Someone’s landed on their paws,’ I said.

‘Jenna, you were so brave! Come and sit next to me.’ Aurora pointed to a space next to her at the kitchen table. ‘Are you injured like Gabe?’

Gabe was sitting at the other end of the table. He had changed his T-shirt and Isobel was bathing some scratches on his arms.

‘This’ll sting, Gabe.’

I looked at the disinfectant and winced. I knew that Gabe couldn’t risk getting an infection. I looked at Gabe, but he looked away.

Marcus was chatting away to everyone.

‘I’m sure my jumper would’ve taken Tallulah’s weight if she’d decided to jump,’ he said.

‘Why jump when you can be carried down?’ I said, trying desperately to catch Gabe’s eye. He seemed equally determined
not
to look at me. I had to do something. I had let
too many chances to sort things out go by. I wasn’t going to waste another one.

‘Last night I was desperate to see Cassiopeia, but the sky was too cloudy. And I was a bit late. Mum and Marcus turned up out of the blue,’ I said.

‘I wouldn’t have had you down as a star-gazer,’ Isobel said, looking surprised.

‘I’ve got interested this summer. Found some books in the shop,’ I said. Gabe still wouldn’t look at me.

‘She came back with a love letter,’ Marcus chipped in.

‘That was astronomical notes, silly,’ I said. Gabe still didn’t look at me.

Aurora came over and put a large mug in front of me. ‘Have some special hot chocolate. Brave people are allowed a mug.’

I sniffed it. ‘Mmm . . . smells of oranges.’ I took a sip.

‘Mum put some booze in it,’ Aurora said as she sat down next to me.

‘Liqueur, Aurora, orange liqueur. Honestly, I don’t know where she gets it from.’ Isobel shook her head disapprovingly.

‘From you, Mummy,’ Aurora said in a sickly sweet voice.

‘It tastes great,’ I said as I sipped the drink.

Sarah frowned. ‘I should be getting back to the stall.’

‘I’ll take Tallulah back home,’ I said. I needed a break from this place. I had made my feelings for Gabe known and I wasn’t sure how he’d react. Now that he had
had time to think things over again he may already have changed his mind about me!

‘Gabe can drive you. That’ll save time. Then he can pick up some groceries on the way back. I feel so besieged here at the moment,’ Isobel said.

Well, there was a chance to find out what he was thinking.

‘We’ll come too,’ Aurora said, standing up and giving Marcus a nudge.

‘No, you won’t. You’re giving an interview to that hideous children’s TV programme,’ said Isobel.

‘Which TV programme?’ Marcus asked.

‘
Hard Cheese
,’ Aurora replied.

‘
You’re
going to be interviewed by Kelly and Leroy?’ Marcus’s eyes nearly popped out of his head.

Aurora nodded. ‘You can come with me if you like.’

Gabe was putting on his jacket and reaching for the car keys off an old hook.

‘We’d better get a move on. The traffic will be crazy.’

I reached over for the basket. ‘Wait – won’t you need it for your cat?’ I asked Aurora.

Isobel handed Gabe a shopping list. ‘Aurora doesn’t have a cat.’

Gabe meowed.

Oh my God
. I nearly gasped out loud. There hadn’t been a cat at all! How embarrassing is that?

I waited till we were in the car before I said anything.

‘Of all the low-down things to do, I think pretending to be a cat is the worst.’

Gabe laughed. ‘It was the
kindest
thing to do. No one likes to be overheard boohooing.’

‘How patronising,’ I said, sniffing.

‘Besides, if you’d known that I’d seen you all bleary-eyed and crazy, then I wouldn’t have stood a chance with you. First impressions are really important.’

‘Actually, I remember very clearly the first time I saw you.’

‘In the shop?’

I shook my head. ‘Nope. You weren’t wearing much the first time I saw you.’

It was Gabe’s turn to blush.

‘Not so clever now.’ I laughed.

‘You’re making it up.’ Gabe turned the car into Sarah’s lane.

‘Maybe I am, maybe I’m not,’ I said.

Tallulah meowed and scratched the sides of the basket.

‘She knows she’s home.’

Gabe opened the door of the battered Land Rover.

As I manoeuvred the bulky basket and myself out he held my arm to steady me. I reached over and kissed his cheek. He curled a strand of my hair in his fingers and was gently tugging at it.

We settled Tallulah in and left her with plenty of dried food.

‘Let’s not go back just yet,’ Gabe said. ‘Isobel can wait for the shopping. I’ll say we got stuck in festival traffic. We need to sort a few things out.’

‘It’ll be strange to spend some time together in the daylight,’ I said with a grin.

We took a throw off the sofa and threw it on the grass in the back garden, then sat down together.

‘It’s so peaceful here,’ I said as I stretched out. ‘With the sound of the festival just a faint noise carried on the wind, it’s like being safe inside your house
with a storm raging outside.’

Gabe lay down next to me and said, ‘About last night . . . it seemed like I was waiting for ever you to come. I’d deliberately arrived a few minutes late. I wanted you to be already
there waiting for me. Then when you didn’t come part of me was relieved. I convinced myself that my life is complicated enough without having a full-on relationship.’

I moved away from him on the rug. But he moved towards me so that our arms were touching and continued. ‘So I wrote the note and left quickly. I couldn’t get you out of my head that
quickly. The next morning I was coming to find you . . .’

‘Jackson is not my boyfriend, you know,’ I said.

‘You seemed pretty cosy.’

‘So do you and Cleo,’ I pointed out.

‘As Julius would say, touché!’

‘Jackson is good-looking and he can be very charming, but he doesn’t smell right.’

‘What?’

‘He doesn’t smell of fresh lemon mixed with something deep like freshly dug earth.’

‘Yuck!’

‘It’s the way that you smell to me and I like it,’ I said. ‘I really like to sniff the side of your cheek.’

Gabe sat up and nuzzled his face next to mine. ‘Sniff away.’

‘Only if you tell me what I smell of?’

He snuffled round my face and hair. ‘Fresh mint with a hint of jasmine.’ He sniffed again. ‘That might just be sweat.’

‘Stop it,’ I said, giggling.

Gabe put on a hurt expression. ‘
You
started the smell thing.’

‘How was London?’ I asked.

It was like someone had flicked a switch inside Gabe. His face drained of expression and he flopped back down on the rug.

‘What is it?’ I asked.

‘Nothing,’ he said, ‘and everything . . .’

Then he began to cry. Not snotty loud sobs like mine, but soft straight tears that rolled like trained dancers down his cheek.

We lay in silence for a long time and then I said, ‘Meow.’

Gabe smiled. And, wiping away his tears, he said, ‘When I was small I used to imagine that I had been abducted by aliens. They had replicated my body and returned a slightly faulty one
back to earth. My true body was kept in a large flotation tank full of soft amber jelly where it was warm and safe. The real me was waiting for the aliens to be defeated. My replicate self would
then be forced to lie in the tank. I wouldn’t want it to be killed. We were all victims of the aliens’ fiendish plan. I used to draw endless pictures of aliens and spaceships. I read
every book I could find about them. It helped me come to terms with stuff, I suppose.’

I stroked his arm. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Look, Jenna. I don’t want your pity.’

Gabe pulled his arm away, but I grabbed it back. I said, ‘What am I supposed to do? I am sorry that this thing has happened to you. I won’t lie. I even feel sorry for myself.
That’s the truly pathetic thing. I feel sorry for myself. I’m scared.’

‘There’s nothing to be afraid of,’ Gabe said softly.

‘Crap! There are heaps of things to be scared of. We are afraid of stuff like snakes and heights for a reason – they can kill us. I’m not scared of you, but I am terrified of
the virus inside you!’

‘There are risks, that’s true, but I would never expose you to any danger. If anything, I’m more at risk from you.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘My immune system is shot to pieces. Germs that you can shake off could be lethal to me. So many people think that HIV can be cured with a few pills. It can be
controlled
by
medication but there is no cure. The bugs can be knocked out, but they can’t be killed. If I miss my meds by even an hour, then everything falls apart. The bugs wake up and I have to start
all over again. That means more visits to the hospital and tests.’

I stroked his hair. This time he didn’t pull away from me.

I said, ‘When you are a child you think that everything can be put right. A broken toy can get fixed. A nightlight stops you being scared of the dark. Maybe growing up is realising that
life doesn’t work out like that. I suppose I’ve always known, deep down, that Mia would never tell the truth. That our friendship was not as deep as I believe true friendships should
be. And I know that your HIV is not going to go away because I’m wishing it. Fairy tales lie. You can’t always be rescued.’

‘So are you saying that I’m not your handsome prince, come to sweep you off your feet?’

I laughed. ‘Just try sweeping me off my feet, mate.’

Gabe lunged at me and we both ended up collapsed on the rug. Neither of us made a move. We just stayed squeezed together for a long time.

‘I’m starving,’ Gabe said, standing up.

‘Crying does that to you,’ I said.

He hugged me. ‘Tell anyone that you’ve seen me cry and you are dead meat.’

‘No
problemo
. I’ll just add it to my list of secrets never to be spoken.’

I hugged Gabe back tightly. I could feel his heart beating fast next to mine.

‘Definitely jasmine,’ he said, sniffing my cheek again, then followed me into the kitchen.

We were dealing with the situation with jokes. It seemed to work for us.

‘Gourmet lunch,’ Gabe said as he carried his plate back to the garden.

‘
Nouvelle cuisine
.’

We were sharing three crackers with a smear of tuna and a leftover pineapple ring.

‘When are you going back to London?’ Gabe asked.

‘Not sure. Most probably the beginning of September. Why?’

‘I am moving back here for a while. I am going to do my A-levels at the community school.’

‘One good thing about Mia not spilling the beans is that I still have no school to go to. Nothing definite anyway. Sarah hasn’t asked me to leave yet. I’m sure she’d let
me stay. I could go to the community school too.’

‘That would be good.’

He said it like he really meant it.

‘What are Cleo’s plans?’

‘She’s not sure what to do. She is living with her cousin in London during term time, but that is not working out so well. She may hang around here too. You’d be OK with
that?’

‘Fine.’

What else could I say? I couldn’t interfere with the things they shared. I had to accept it.

I rolled over on my front and picked at some of the overgrown grass on the lawn. ‘I can’t believe we are going to be performing at the festival tomorrow. I’ve never had any
ambition to do that before. I hope I don’t freeze when I see everyone.’

‘The main thing is not to take it too seriously. Relax and get into the chilled festival mood.’

I sprang to my feet. ‘Mum’s lent me a great T-shirt to wear. I’ll go and get it.’

I raced up to my room and got changed. I was just checking how it looked in the mirror when I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.

Someone was watching me.

There was only one person who made my flesh creep like that.

‘Kai!’ I said, without turning round.

Chapter Thirty-Six

‘
J
ust can’t tear myself away from you, Jenna,’ Kai said as he walked into the room.
‘Great top, by the way. Classic T-shirts fetch a lot of money these days.’

I leaned against the chest of drawers and said, ‘Surely you’ve taken everything of value by now. That vase must’ve got you enough.’