Authors: Shelby Fallon
“Sorry. My mom is always making me do this kinda stuff and never does it herself.” He put his hands in his pockets and rolled his eyes. “It’s embarrassing. I’m really sorry. Anyway, see ya.”
“Yeah...see ya.”
Elena was perplexed as she watched him swiftly stride back to his house, next door to hers, and up the path quickly. She walked back to her new house and went inside after checking the mailbox, knowing there wouldn’t be anything in there yet.
She’d wait for Alex to get home before making any decisions on supper, but she was starving. It was humorous to her how slowly time passed when you have a bear in your stomach yelling at you ever two minutes. She couldn’t believe how hungry she was and realized how much running around she’d actually done today. Alex would be here any minute, she reassured herself.
When Alex walked in the door, she heard him from the other room. She peeked around the corner and when he saw her and smiled she ran to him and jumped in his arms. He was so cute to her with his briefcase and suit. He hated it of course. She wrapped her legs around him and kissed him as he stood in the doorway. He held her up with ease.
“Hey,” he laughed, “how was your day? I guess you got the job?” He managed to get out through kisses.
“Yes! It was so great. I love it there. It’s...fun.” She chuckled remembering the odd man and his wife. “How was your first day, sir,” she said yanking on his tie knot.
“Ha ha. You know I hate this monkey suit. But it was good. I have my own office, which is nice.”
“Good, I’m glad. Now can we go eat please! I’m starving!”
“Ok, ok! Let me change. Hmmm.” He smelled her neck, letting his nose and lips skim her skin. “You coming home smelling like gardenias, I could get use to that.” He laughed as he put her down and shuffled to the bedroom quickly, not closing the door.
She watched him get dressed from the hall.
Gorgeous.
He returned wearing a green polo and jeans. Elena couldn’t contain herself from reaching out and grabbing him in a more than casual kiss. Looking at him just now and now seeing him with his jeans...
What’s wrong with me?
He ended the kiss laughing and shaking his head at her like he could read her thoughts, grabbed her hand then they walked out to the truck.
The restaurant wasn’t really busy, which was fine because that meant they should get the food sooner. They enjoyed eating at the local eateries as opposed to the food chains. These small towns seemed to have good food.
Their choice for the night was “Angie’s Table”, attached to the old bank on one side and the hardware store on the other. No doubt this building had been around long before most of these people, and they were still using them. It was sweet that they tried to preserve their heritage this way, Elena thought.
Alex ordered an order of cheese sticks for an appetizer. Then Elena ordered a smoked turkey sandwich on wheat and steak fries with a vanilla shake. Alex said he’d have the same. She scarfed that down then asked the waitress for a piece of their apple pie with ice cream. ‘World Famous’ said the sign.
“You want something else, babe?” Elena asked Alex before the waitress left to retrieve her desert.
“Uh, yeah, I’ll try the pecan pie, I guess, since we’re ordering desert.”
He stared at Elena bewildered and amused.
“What?”
“Are you ok? I’ve never seen you eat so much. Not since the day I first met you.”
“I’m sorry, I’m just hungry. I stood up and walked all day, maybe that’s it. I’ve been starving all day,” she said as she sucked down the last of her shake and started on the water beside it.
“No, it’s ok. I’ve got no problems with it, I just-” he stopped, wide eyed staring at her. “Wait...”
“What?” Then she got his meaning. “Uh, no, no. We’ve been very careful, Alex, haven’t we? I would know if I was...that,” Elena said with assurance but her breathing started to pick up as she thought about it.
Pregnant? No.
“Babe,” he reached across the table for her hand, “the crying, the going to bed at 8:00, the can’t keep your hands off me, the...starving?” Alex didn’t look as bemused as he had just a minute ago. He was almost beaming. “We are careful, El, but...no one can be one hundred percent on these things all the time. I think you need to take a pregnancy test.”
She stiffened and felt her eyes widen at his request.
“I will not take a test. That would mean that I actually believe that this could be possible.” She was trying not to yell, it was impossible after all.
Nothing to worry about. She shook her head as if to shake the thought from it. Her thoughts were interrupted by the waitress and the delicious smell of hot pie.
“Alex, it’s fine,” she said and smiled at the waitress before she left their table. “Let’s just finish our desert. Could we go by and see Roger and Amy tonight for a minute? See how their first day went?”
“Yeah, we can. That’s sounds like a really good idea actually...if you promise to take a test when we get home.” Alex was serious.
The last thing Elena wanted to do was fight with him. It wasn’t natural to fight him, it made her feel wretched inside.
“Why wait until then? Let’s go right now, get one and take it before we go and get it over with. Ok?”
“Ok,” he said reluctantly, feeling he had won that one a little to easily.
Once the pie was gone, and the crumbs licked cleaned from Elena’s fork, they headed home after a quick stop at the drug store. Alex waited outside the bathroom door pacing while Elena waited inside, looking at that horrid little stick that held her fate.
One line. Is it supposed to be two or one? Ok. The box says one line is...negative. And it’s been three minutes so...must be negative...
Alex rapped on the door.
“El, you ok in there?” he said as he gently eased open the door.
What he saw brought him to his knees beside her on the floor where she was sitting on her legs, crying with the one line test still latched tightly in her fingers.
“It’s negative...negative,” she said through her tears.
She had no idea why she was having this kind of reaction. Shouldn’t she be happy? Isn’t this what she wanted? No. No if she was honest with herself, she was scared more than anything but wanted to be a mother desperately. To have a child with Alex and see him be a daddy, to give him everything he wanted, give him happiness. She wanted that.
“I thought you’d be happy about that,” he said somberly.
“No...I was lying to myself, Alex, and you. I was just scared of messing up, of not being good at it. But...I guess, I really do want a baby. Or else why would I react this way?”
Alex hugged her and pulled her up from the floor to sit in his lap as she sniffled.
“I’m sorry, El. We can always try again. Later though. You were right, it’s a little crazy to try for a baby while we’re in this mess.” He squeezed her tighter. “It’s ok. It’s good to know that I’m not the only one that wants one though. I want more than anything to see you be a mom. That gorgeous baby will have your eyes and your dark blonde hair. I can see it now.” He smoothed her hair back and then lifted her chin. “Are you ok? Do you still wanna go to Roger’s?”
“Yeah. And yeah, we’ll try later, I promise. No more drama. I’m sorry, I know you really wanted this and I’ve been driving you crazy with my back and forth. I feel like I’m having a...breakdown or something,” she croaked out. “If I’m not pregnant, maybe I should go to the doctor. I definitely don’t feel right.”
“You should. It’s probably just too much stuff going on. Too much stress, everything at once. Alright, let’s go, if you’re ready and still want to. You know Amy, she’ll be passed out soon if we don’t make it before 7:00 so...”
“Yeah, lets go.” She looked up to see his hesitant expression. “Really, I’m ok. I’m just weird right now. I’m fine, I’m sorry.”
He helped her up and they made their way to the front door but stopped in the doorway.
“Don’t apologize for that.” He reached down to coax her face back up with his finger on her chin. “Don’t be sorry at all. There’s nothing wrong with the way you feel. Elena, I just want you to be happy, whatever that is. We have time, lots of it. And I’m not going anywhere. And you’re not going anywhere.” He chuckled a little pushing his forehead to hers. “I love you. Don’t ever do anything just because you think that’s what I want. I’m sorry if I pushed you. Whenever and if ever you’re ready. Not til then, ok?”
“Thanks. I love you.”
He kissed her in the door frame, engulfed her in an embrace meant to make her feel loved, shielded and safe, which is exactly what it did. They could feel the cool night air on their arms from the porch, giving Elena goose bumps for more than one reason.
Elena wanted to cry more at Alex’s sweet words, but fought them back. He really meant what he said. But how could she ever deny someone the right to a child, especially someone so equipped for such a task? She knew it now, knew that she wanted to have a baby with him. And she
was
upset that the test in her hand said negative. That fact couldn’t be denied.
The sweet moment was interrupted by the sound of footsteps on the porch.
“Uhum. I see nothing’s changed around here,” Roger’s amused voice said and they turned.
Roger and Amy were standing on the porch and smiling, smirking.
“Hey! We were just about to come see you guys,” Alex said as Elena quickly turned to wipe her eyes and throw the worthless pregnancy test in the trash.
She turned to greet Amy as they came through the door.
“Hey! You look bigger already, after just one day,” Elena said laughing but Amy’s thin lip smile told her she knew something was up.
“Yeah. I know. It’s terrible. I outgrow clothes daily... You ok?”
“Oh, I’m fine. Please, let’s just go sit and- wait a minute. Alex we don’t have any furniture yet, remember?”
“Ah! Yeah, the furniture won’t be here til tomorrow night,” Alex said looking around for a solution but finding none.
“Well we came here thinking you might have some by now, we sure don’t,” Roger said laughing.
They decided to go out, even though Elena and Alex had just gotten home. They went to a little coffee shop that had live music with local kids and people playing acoustic. It was nice, Elena thought, very inner city for a small town.
They talked and talked as Elena persistently avoiding Amy’s questioning eyes about what she was crying about earlier. She didn’t want to have the pregnancy discussion with a pregnant lady. So they chatted about their days work. Roger thought Amy should stay home but after hearing that Elena was working and that Alex thought it was a good idea for them to not be home by their selves all day, with no protection, he willingly agreed for Amy doing the same.
She was ecstatic. She got hired at a veterinarian’s office as a receptionist. Desk work, perfect for her. Forced to sit and rest all day. Roger and Alex weren’t really thrilled about their work but tried not to be too somber about it in front of Amy and Elena, though Elena would not be fooled.
After they chatted for a while and their coffee cups were empty. Amy downed three entire cups of Chai tea and started to yawn and that was pretty much the signal to indicate that the night was over. They hugged and said their goodbyes and made the parting paths in opposite directions to their homes a hop and a skip from downtown.
Downtown. Ha!
It amused Elena, the small town jargon used to describe their ‘hole in the wall’ town, as she’d heard someone say.
They must have never been to a
real
city before. This is certainly not a ‘downtown’ area.
They drove home and Elena was tired, more so that she realized. The short drive in the dark was already taking its toll. Alex helped her up the porch stairs and into their pallet on the floor. They lay peacefully, Elena snuggled under his chin into his chest with his arms around her like clap irons, protective and gentle as always. And they drifted off to sleep.
The next day after Elena got home from work, the delivery men were scheduled to be there shortly after and were right on time. They brought the bed in and set everything up right where Elena instructed. Then as they headed back out to the truck she thanked them as she started to close the door.
“Wait, ma’am, we have one more item,” the delivery man said and immediately starting looking at his delivery notice to make sure.
“Uh...I think that’s it. Just the bed, right?”
“Nope, right here. I’m showing one more item to deliver.”
Elena stood there door half opened, still thinking it was a mistake and he would figure it out eventually, but he pulled the box out, double checked the label and nodded in agreement before taking it up the steps.
Elena opened the door reluctantly. Once he set it inside he tipped his cap to her on his way out. She closed the door, dreading the call to make advising the furniture man that a box had been delivered by mistake. She peeked at it and it did have Alex’s name and address. All at once her heart was in her throat.
The Community. The traffickers! They found us and got the men to deliver this to us somehow. What if it’s a bomb or something?
As she was mid freak out Alex came through the door.
She ran to him, already crying. She started to blubber on about her revelation and how they should get out of the house right now. He grabbed her arms as if to hold her down from fleeing.
“El, calm down, baby. I ordered something else from the furniture store. It’s ok. I know what’s in the box. No one knows we’re here. I’m sorry, it was meant to be a surprise. I never would have thought you would jump to that conclusion. You don’t feel safe here?” he asked her, still not letting go.