Steeling My Haart (20 page)

Emma knew her mom
would be a perfect grandma, although this wasn’t the way she had ever envisioned
things turning out. Having such unwavering support from her mom was
overwhelming. Hearing her mom accept the situation as if it were the most
natural thing in the world made her decision all the more perfect, for both her
and the children.

        
“I
know, Mom, they are both pretty special, aren’t they? I just hope I can be the
mom and dad they need.”

        
“You
already are, and Lily knew you’d be the best choice. Like I said, I’m proud of
you, Emma, and when you finally bring them home, it will be perfect.” Kissing
her daughter on the forehead and releasing her from the embrace “See you in a
couple of days. My cab is waiting downstairs and your dad will be in soon so
I’d better get moving. Love you, honey, take care of those treasures for me,”
she said as she placed another kiss on Emma’s cheek. She then walked over to
the small bag and headed out to meet Mike.

        
By
the time Emma had showered and tidied up the living area, Bruce and Lou were
arriving, both carrying bags from M’s Place. “Evenin’, darlin’,” Lou greeted
her with a kiss to her cheek.

Bruce followed swiftly and took her
into a big hug as he greeted her warmly, “You look like you needed that. How
you bearing up?”

        
“I’m
good, well, as much as I can be, really. Tonight was harsh, but I’m getting
over the tears now, I think. I just want whoever did this to get what’s coming
to them and then move on.” She sighed, and then turned to look at the bags that
Lou was taking over to the kitchen.
 
As she breathed in deeply her stomach
rumbled. “Something smells good, I’m actually starving.”

        
“Jeez,
darlin’, we guessed you wouldn’t have had time to eat much, but I didn’t think
it was that bad! Eat now or you’ll be waking the kids,” Lou joked.

        
They
all sat at the dining table and devoured a hearty meal. They guys had brought a
little of everything she liked and she found out eventually that a little birdy
in the shape of George had let them in on that secret.

        
As
Lou cleared away the now empty plates and set to the washing the dirty dishes,
Bruce took a moment to have a quiet chat. “I know it may be a bad time and all,
but I wanted to talk to you about work before finalize your plans for going
home,” he started looking a little sheepish as he cleared his throat.

        
“Okay,
I’m going to need to get things sorted pretty quickly, though. I want to get
the kids settled and now with everything, I am unsure as to how I’m going to be
able to work like Bill needs me to. Everything is still up in the air but I’m
hoping to speak to the firm I worked at when I was younger and see if they
maybe have anything part time for me initially. With my savings, I’ll be able
to buy a small house outright, enough at least for the three of us and still be
able to live comfortably for a while,” Emma thought out loud.

        
“Well,
hear me out. My father wants to branch out and create a branding specific arm
of the business, one with me at the helm. So I’ve been talking to him at length
today and he agrees we need a second person on board to help. We are looking
for someone who has the expertise to deal with the background legal stuff. At
first the workload won’t be huge, but it is definitely something you… err… they
could do from home,” Bruce quickly corrected himself and threw Emma a hopeful
look. “It would be a new entity and I’d be looking for a business partner to
come into it with me?” He paused and glanced at Emma.

Her mouth fell open
and she was temporarily stunned as she considered what he had just said to her.
“What? Me? Going into partnership with you? Even with everything happening
right now you’d seriously consider that?” Emma said with a mixture of disbelief
and happiness. An opportunity to partner with the country’s leading agency was
an amazing break and to be working with Bruce was just the icing on the cake.

        
“Yes,
Emma, you!” Bruce laughed. “I’ve also been speaking with Bill off the record,
and he seems to think a partnership between you and me could offer him a lot,
too, and he believes it could plug the gap when you leave. He is willing to
train Jennie to deal with the basic office based work the firm would still need
to field, but he’s happy to take us on
 
as consultants for the more complicated
stuff. So, what do you think?”
        
“I’m
speechless,” she replied. “But it could work, especially if I can be home
based. In fact, it’s almost perfect. And I don’t need to feel bad about letting
Bill down, either. Wow.” She had been worried about Bill and the fact she had
to consider leaving the firm to concentrate on the kids. Working with Bruce to
slowly build up a business that included Bill was an opportunity she couldn’t
pass up. She loved her old job and didn’t want to leave Bill in the lurch and
this way everyone was happy.

        
“Okay,
well, you don’t have to decide today, but if you’re interested, then let’s go
with it! Talk to Bill and Jennie. I’d just like to say, I’d love to work with
you, Emma, and even better to have you as my partner,.” Bruce said.

She hesitated before breaking into a
huge grin. This could be the answer to all of her current issues and it was
becoming more appealing by the minute. “Thanks Bruce, I am so grateful for
everything you and Lou have done recently.”

        
“Our
pleasure, darlin’, and I guess you haven’t told him no. He’s still smilin’.”
Lou winked and flashed Emma a smile as he approached, having waited for them to
finish their chat.

                  
The
trio retired to the sofa and embarked on a movie evening, allowing Emma to be
able to go see to the baby when he woke for his feeds. They finished watching a
couple of films and chatted idly, putting the world to rights in more ways than
one. They laughed and argued and debated well into the evening, but kept the
mood light. It had been a refreshing change, which Emma welcomed.

                  
The
rest of the weekend flew by for Emma, a mixture of playing with, consoling, then
soothing the two orphaned babies in her care. It had been difficult at times. Adie
was beginning to realize that her mommy and daddy weren’t coming home again.
She had been reassured that things would get easier. With Nicky’s ever-present
support in New York, Emma had managed to juggle her newly acquired role as
surrogate parent to the two of them over the last week. Now that her mom was
away for a few days, the enormity of everything had hit her.

        
She
found it was going to be pretty easy to finalize most of the leasehold
paperwork for her apartment. That coupled with the immense support she had from
her work colleagues and the daily help she had from Bruce and Lou as well as
her devoted parents, she was finally ready and packed to make the move back to
Oklahoma.

        
The
order appointing her as of the children’s sole guardian was a formality. The judge
presiding over their case had already given her dispensation to leave New York
whilst the final paperwork was put into place. She saw no need for her to
remain in the area when it would be beneficial for everyone to settle in to a
new life as soon a possible.

        
Bill
had been amazing and had accepted, albeit begrudgingly, her resignation with
immediate effect. He was happy with the arrangement that she and Bruce promised.
They were already in the process of negotiating the final terms of their future
arrangement. Bill surprised them both by assisting them with creating the new
entity she and Bruce would eventually be running. He was pretty sad she was
leaving, but he couldn’t think of any reason to keep her from settling down
with the children.

        
After
she had handed the documents to the police they called her in for informal
questioning. This new information gave the police enough to work on to finally
link these murders to two of the most notorious street gangs they had been
watching. It was a huge coup for the department, which led to several high-profile
arrests. It also gave Emma a chance to get some closure on the whole affair and
be able to concentrate on building a future for the three of them.

        
Then
came the funeral. Neither Lily nor Gary had any family outside her and the two
children, so she had a simple graveside service for both of them. The grievance
counselor had instilled into her that it was important for the children’s
grieving process for them to attend, and with the support of the counselor that
CPS had recommended, she did just that. Nicky and Mike, Bruce, and Lou, were
there to support her and Adie through the entire process. Along with them it
was pitiful to see only a handful of Lily’s ex-colleagues and some friends of Gary’s.
It was a quiet affair. She decided to simply take the kids and a few of the
people who had turned up to support her, to M’s Place instead of laying on a
huge formal funeral lunch. It ended up being more of a farewell dinner for the
small new family, to bid them farewell on their move back to Edmond. Were Nicky
and Mike now lived.

        
The
day she and the children were leaving had come a lot more quickly that she had
anticipated. It felt strange for Emma to be standing in the entrance to her now
fairly empty apartment. Bruce and Lou were eager to keep some of the furniture,
which helped her avoid removal costs. She wasn’t sad because she was about to
move back home. Although the place held as many good memories as bad ones for
her, she was happier it was going to be somewhere Bruce and Lou could now make
their home. She was about to lock up and take the key downstairs when Lou
arrived and took her by surprise. He was grateful to her for letting him and
Bruce rent the place until they could get enough together to buy it from
her.
 
She was charging them a
reduced rent and wouldn’t budge when they tried to offer her more. She knew if
the new partnership between her and Bruce was only half as successful as she
anticipated, he would earn enough in bonuses over the next twelve months to put
a sizeable down payment on the place. And to thank them for their unwavering
support, she had also agreed to reduce her asking price by the amount of rent
they had already paid.

        
“So,
darlin’, I guess this is goodbye for now. I’m really gonna miss you and the
snot monsters. C’mere and give me a last hug.” Lou stepped towards her and
engulfed her in his arms. They stood there for a few long minutes, both taking
comfort in each other. As Lou released her she saw a look of contentment cross
his face. “This is it for us both. We both get a fresh start and I’m hoping
yours is gonna be as good as mine is brewin’ to be. You take good care of them
little ‘uns and don’t be a stranger. We’ll be comin’ an’ visitin’ whenever we
can, you hear me?” he insisted.

        
“Thanks,
Lou, for everything you’ve done for me and the kids. Look after Bruce, too.
He’s a good guy and I hope you both enjoy your new place. It’s a lovely
apartment, but I’m just glad it’s finally found the right people to make it a
home. You know where we’ll be and honestly my mom can’t wait for you guys to
come and visit. I think she is your one woman fan club, seriously.” Emma chuckled.

        
“I’m
gonna miss you all. And I’ll especially miss swapping recipes with Nicky. She
is truly a gem, though. You’re lucky to have her.”

        
“I
know. She’s the best. I couldn’t have done any of this without her or you two, for
that matter. Are you coming down to say goodbye to the kids?”

        
“Nah.
I’ve seen ‘em already and I don’ want to upset them any more than they are
already. You take care now. We promise to come visit soon.”

        
They
hugged for a long time before Lou slowly released Emma, kissed her on the
forehead and took the keys. He smiled as she entered the elevator and as the
doors closed, she saw a solitary tear of slip down Lou’s cheek as he waved her
off. As she descended in the elevator for the last time, the nerves were started
to kick in. They had a long journey home and she was becoming increasingly
nervous about what may be waiting back in Oklahoma.

        
Charlie
had never been far from her thoughts and was the one main reason she had stayed
away. The hardest thing for her to face would be the prospect of seeing Charlie
happy and settled with someone else. Why hadn’t he come back for her? That was
the biggest question she wanted to ask. And where was he when her heart broke
after she lost their baby? She felt that the way her life was turning out was a
second chance for her to raise a family. Adie and Leo weren’t hers by blood,
but every day she spent with them she fell just a little more in love. She
wanted to bring them up in a happy home and whether she was clinging onto a
fantasy, she knew the only other time she had been truly happy in her life was
when she was with Charlie, even after all he had put her through.

        
Despite
what he had written in his letter, she always knew he was good enough for her.
In fact, she truly believed all along it was her who was not good enough for
him or worthy of his love. No matter how much she had kept telling herself
enough was enough over the years, the feelings she had for Charlie were still
there. She felt she needed someone, him, more now than ever. They had been on
the verge of settling down and making a life for themselves. She couldn’t help
thinking that it would have been a life that would have been far less fraught
and much happier than hers had ended up being. They perhaps wouldn’t have been
rich in terms of money, but that had to be better than the huge empty chasm
that she carried in her heart every day. After several attempts at dating, she
realized that her heart had still been too caught up in Charlie. For the first
few years she had been away and up until recently her work had ruled her life.
She had never wanted to feel his arms around her more or the unwavering support
he had previously given her as much as she needed it right now. She was scared
and alone.

        
As
the elevator reached the first floor, she looked up to the ceiling, closed her
eyes and whispered, “Charlie, if you can hear me, I need you more than ever. I
can’t do this alone. If you are still out there waiting, I’ll be back soon.”
Wiping a tear from her cheek she purposefully strode out to the lobby and bid
the regular doorman a fond farewell. She found Bruce and her mom waiting for
her on the sidewalk with both of the kids. They had taken them for a last play
in the park to let them burn off some energy before their flight to Oklahoma.
Mike had headed back a few days ago, insisting on driving the U-Haul that Emma
had hired to take their belongings home. She was going to pay for a removal
team to come and do everything for her, but when Mike heard the quote, he was
more than happy to offer his services. He had said he could break his trip up
and visit a couple of his suppliers on his way home. One of the senior managers
he had recently appointed had flown out to accompany him and she was glad to
hear that they had made it home safely last night.

        
Bruce
had helped Emma sort through Lily and Gary’s apartment after the police had
finished their investigations and most of the items had now been removed. She
had appointed Bruce to deal with most of the finalization of the estate on her
behalf, whilst she took the kids and got them settled back home. Most of the
children’s belongings and toys had been shipped back with Mike, and the rest
Emma had either donated to local charities or anything valuable she had sold at
a local auction house. Lou had been a huge help, too, and had assisted Emma in
removing a lot of personal items belonging to Gary and Lily to make ‘memory
boxes’ for the kids, too. She wanted them to know everything about their
parents in time. So photographs and anything personal was carefully boxed and
preserved for Emma to take with her and, in time, share with Leo and Adie.

        
As
she headed toward Bruce to say goodbye, she saw George and Bobby standing on
the sidewalk, too. George was cuddling Leo, and Adie was filling Bobby in on
her favorite cupcake fillings. It was a sight that made her heart soften. She
hadn’t realized she had so many people supporting her in New York, but although
she would be sad to say goodbye, she had a better life waiting for her back
home.

 
      
“Come
on, honey, we have to get to the airport if we have a chance of getting on that
flight,” her mom said quietly.

        
“Just
a minute. I need to say goodbye to these guys. Can you get the kids in and
secured?”

        
“Sure
thing, honey,” she said as she took a giggling Leo from George.

Bruce headed to Adie and gently took
her hand. Bowing low, he stretched his hand towards the large Escalade SUV he
had borrowed from his father for this trip. “This way, Princess, your carriage
awaits.”

        
“Fank
ewe, Pwince Bwucie. Oh, look you have my pwincess seat in yowr car!” Adie
exclaimed, excited to be reunited with it.

        
Bruce
and Adie wandered to the car and as he secured her in the seat, Emma could hear
the giggles erupting. The sound lightened the mood, but as she stepped to
George and Bobby, it took her all her effort not to break down.

        
“I’m
going to miss you guys. Where am I going to get my daily fix of carbs and
sugar?” she said weakly, her eyes misting with tears.

        
“Well,
Miss Emma, you will be missed, but you are doin’ just the right thing by those
adorable kids, you know? I’m sure we can do without our most valued customer
knowin’ she’s doin’ good somewhere else. You come back an’ visit, though,” George
choked out.

        
“Don’t
lose it just yet, George, I’ll never make away it in one piece if you do.” Emma
sniffed as she hugged him hard. “I’ll be back, and look at it this way, you’ve
gained another two local customers now. Keep them out of trouble, will you?”
She smiled as she pointed her thumb in Bruce’s direction.

“Will do, Miss Emma. Take care,” he
said as he released her to Bobby’s embrace.

        
“Bye,
Emma, take care of them young ‘uns, and don’t be a stranger if you’re ever
back.” She broke the embrace, got into the vehicle, and like that she was finally
leaving New York behind.