Sweet Talking Cowboy (22 page)

Briann discovered she was holding her breathe and exhaled,
forcing her heart rate to slow down.  She tore her eyes away from his, pulled
her arm free and walked over to look out the window, looking down on the barn
and fields below.  “What?”  With her back to him, she was able to regain her
preferred perspective.

He saw the determined, warily maintained stiffening of her
back and knew she was angry at herself for the stirring of desire he’d
recognized for what it was.  It would not be smart, no matter how badly he
wanted to, to pursue that any further right now.  He couldn’t resist a small
smile, and hoped it didn’t show in his voice as he spoke.

“Tristin’s favorite letter is capital B.  Like in Butler.”

Briann heard the pride in his voice.  “I know.  She likes to
make the bumps on the side,” she nodded.  Then, her heart rate now under
control, and a little distance she felt it safe, so she turned to look at him. 
“Are you leading up to a name change?”

His smile widened on one side of his mouth, deepening that crease
in his cheek in a maddeningly attractive way.  He nodded.  “I’d like that, but
I don’t want to rock the boat.”

She shrugged.  “I don’t suppose that would be a problem. 
I’ll talk to her.”

He nodded, the blue in his eyes darkening slightly.  She
recognized it as a sign of desire and started across the room, seeking escape. 
“The guest room is the first door on the right.  Make yourself at home there;
it’s going to be your room when you spend the night, so you can find your way
around in it for yourself.”

Slade watched her go.  The look of panic he’d seen in her
eyes earlier slipped off the shelf he’d put it on and drifted around in his
thoughts.  She was afraid of the passion they shared, he knew that, but what
had the panic meant?  She’d been looking at him and Tris, together.  He knew
she resented his intrusion into their lives, but surely she knew he wouldn’t
ever do anything to hurt their little girl.  So why would seeing the two of
them together cause her to feel threatened?  Threatened to the point of panic. 
Briann had become effective at concealing most of her feelings and when he got
a guarded glimpse of anything, it was fleeting.  He’d have to think about this
some more.  Carefully he put the memory back on its shelf.  Maybe tonight when
he got home he could take it down again and think about it some more.  It was
important that he get this right.

When he approached the dining room a few minutes later, the
three of them were just preparing to sit down.  Tristin smiled up at him as she
pulled out a chair.  “Can I sit beside you?”  She asked.

“That’ll be great!” he agreed pulling out the chair next to
the one she was settling into.

Poog was a wonderful cook, but Slade didn’t taste a lot of
it.  He ate, but kept his attention focused on Tristin.  However, he still
found it impossible to ignore the fact that Briann sat at the same table almost
within touching distance.

Poog read his body language as easily as she read a book and
Briann’s too.  They were both making extreme efforts to pretend that the other
was just a lump of clay.  If it weren’t so strained, it could almost be funny. 
Or maybe it was just tragic, she wasn’t sure which.  She knew they were both
crazy about their child. Even a blind person could see that.  Mike would have
openly teased them about the electricity snapping in the air between them.  She
wished things had worked out differently.  But they were both stubborn, hard
headed people, independent and used to having their own way.  She couldn’t help
wondering if there was anything she could do to change the situation.

She realized her dining companions were all three silently
looking at her as if waiting for something.  “What?” she said defensively.

“Tris asked if you are going to take her to school
tomorrow.”  Briann said, but then continued.  “You must have been somewhere
else for a minute.”

Poog nodded.  “I was thinking about Mike.  How much he’d
have enjoyed us sitting around this table together.”  Her eyes sparkled, “How
much teasing he would have dished out at you two.”

Slade looked at Briann in time to see the slight smile of
acknowledgement before she dropped her head and looked down into her plate.

“He always spoke his mind,” he agreed.

“Whether you wanted to hear it or not,” Briann agreed.  The
she looked at Aunt Poog.  “So, Tris still wants to know if you’re going to take
her to school tomorrow.”

Poog nodded.  “Of course I am,” she looked at the little
girl sitting next to Slade. “Unless you’d rather I didn’t.”

Tris smiled knowingly.  She knew Aunt Poog was giving her
dad a chance to step in, and when she looked up at him, he didn’t miss a beat.

“Maybe I could take her,” he offered, pretending not to
notice the hope in her eyes.  “I’ve always wondered where the school is.”  He
looked down at her.  “They’ve built a new buildin’ since I went to school and I
don’t think I’ve ever seen it.  Can you tell me where I’m supposed to turn, if
I take you?”

Tristin nodded as she rolled her eyes.  “It’s easy.  It’s
behind the li-bary.”

“I’d like to take you,” he cut his eyes to Briann and was
relieved to see her nod.

“And I’ll pick you up a little early after school,” Briann
said.  “I’ll need to go to the office to put your dad’s name on the list of
people who can pick you up.”  She looked at him.  “Until they get used to you
picking her up part of the time, you’ll have to go in and sign, so they can let
her go with you.  After I put you on the list, you can pick her up whenever you
want to, unless we have conflicting schedules.  Just let me or Aunt Poog know.”

He nodded, only his eyes showing the cynicism her need to
exercise her parental authority brought out in him.  He looked at Poog.  “What
time should I pick her up in the mornin’?”

“If you come at seven, you can have breakfast with her.” 
She knew he usually settled for a piece of toast and a cup of coffee and had
always scolded him for not eating the way he should.

Slade looked down at Tris and winked one of his surprising
blue eyes.  “I think I’m gonna really like bein’ your dad.  I’m already eatin’
better that I have in years.”

Tris giggled.  “I think I’m going to like you being my dad,
too.  You’re funny and handsome.”

Poog smothered a laugh and Briann tried to pretend she
hadn’t heard what the child said.

“Well,” Slade grinned.  “I’d tell you how pretty I think you
are, but it might sound like I was braggin’ on myself, ‘cause you look a lot
like me.”

Tris’ small black brows arched in surprise.  “I do?”

“Sure do.  In fact, you look even more like my mother.  I’ve
got a picture of her I’ll show you sometime.”

“Can’t I meet her?”

“I wish you could, but she was real sick and died when I was
just a boy.  She’d have really loved bein’ your grandmother.”  His eyes didn’t
stray from his daughter’s face.  “She was an Indian, and there’s nothin’ an
Indian woman loves more than spoilin’ her grandchildren.”

Tristin’s eyes widened with delight.  “You’re an Indian,
too?”

He nodded.  “I’m half Indian.  My father is a white man. 
One day, you’ll get to meet him.”

“Am I an Indian, too?”

He smiled.  “Part Indian.”

Tristin smiled and was quiet for a minute.  Then she looked
at him again.  “Do you have an Indian name?”

He nodded.  “Yes, and we’ll talk about it one day soon. 
Indian names have special meanin’s to them and we don’t talk about them a lot.”

Briann frowned as she looked down into her plate.  She’d
never heard Slade talk about his Native American heritage.  The pride in his
voice made it clear that he placed great value on it, and she found herself
disappointed that in only a few hours, Tris had found out something about him
that she’d never known in all the years she’d been around him.

“Can I have an Indian name?”  The question was asked in a
voice that was soft and hesitant.

Realizing her uncertainty was because he’d told her that
names were special to Indians, he knew she was trying to be respectful, but it
pleased him to see how enthusiastic she was to learn about her new cultural heritage. 
She knew nothing about his beliefs, but was making it clear that she was eager
to be taught.

“Yes, but not for a while.  Together, we’ll learn what it
should be, and when we know, we’ll tell only the people who you want to tell. 
If your mom and Aunt Poog don’t mind, maybe we can get a shaman friend of mine
in Texas to come for a visit, and have a namin’ ceremony.”

Tristin was too pleased to talk.  She looked with big solemn
eyes at the two women at the table.  “I’ve finished my supper.  Can I be
excused?  I want to go to the barn.”

She was excused and without looking at anyone but Speck, she
slipped out the door and disappeared, the faithful dog right on her heels.

Slade looked puzzled.  “Did I say something wrong?”

“No,” Briann admitted reluctantly.  “You’ve touched her very
deeply.  There’s an old horse down in the barn that she needs to talk to.  When
she needs to share things that she’s not sure how to express, she goes to
Sparky or Speck.  She says they’re her best friends.  She’ll be back in a
while.”

Slade eyes were soft as he looked at her.  “I don’t know
what to say to you, Bri.  I know I’ve been a jerk, but I was scared to death of
never havin’ the chance to be with her.  I can’t tell you what I feel right
now.  She’s just so…….”  Words failed him and he finally shrugged his broad
shoulders.

She nodded, and then even laughed softly.  “That’s exactly
the way I see her.  There just aren’t words to describe Tristin.”

Poog stood up and began stacking dishes, but Slade stood up
and reached out to stop her.  “Nope.  You cooked.  You sit and rest. I’ll wash
dishes.”

Poog laughed.  “You aren’t washing
my
dishes.  I’d
like to use them again.”  She slapped playfully at his hands as he tried to
take the plates from her.  “Some of these dishes belonged to my mother and I
don’t want them broken in a million pieces.”

“I’ll be careful,” he promised.

“No, no and no!”  She quipped back at him.  “No!  You got
that?”

He withdrew his hands.  “I think so.”

“Just go somewhere and let us get our work done.  When Tris
comes back in, she’ll find you.”

He glanced at Briann for support, but she was already
carrying the glasses toward the sink.

Aimlessly he passed through the den and found his steps
carrying him up the stairs to the study.  It was a very comfortable room.  He’d
noted where Briann had placed the scrapbook he and Tris had been looking at and
he pulled it off the shelf and settled back in Mike’s old easy chair again.

With Tris beside him earlier, he’d made sure he didn’t allow
himself the freedom to feel anything as he’d turned the pages.  Now, he turned
each page slowly, his eyes filling his heart with wonder as each photo showed
Briann in a different stage of pregnancy.  He read the notes she’d written on
each page, his heart racing, his mind swirling with thoughts of her and wishing
he could have been with her.  In one, she’d noted that it was the day she’d
first felt the baby move.  In another, he read that it was when she’d learned
that the baby would be a girl.  There were a few pictures of a smiling, dark
complexioned man and he knew he must have been the man that Briann had
married.  His jaws clenched tensely, but he flipped the page and he found
himself locked into Briann’s face smiling proudly up from the page, reclined on
a bed in the hospital, Tristin cradled carefully in her arms.

A sound at the door caught his attention and he looked up. 
She was standing there looking at him.

“I thought I put that away.”  She stayed at the door.

“You did,” he acknowledged.  “I wanted to look at it
again.”  The shade of blue in his eyes deepened.  “I’ve always heard that
pregnant women were more beautiful, but personally I never found that true. 
Until I looked at this book.  I can’t tell you how it makes me feel to see
these pictures of you.”

She leaned one shoulder against the door frame.  “It’s just
knowing that the changes in my body were because it was your child growing
there.  That’s how men think of it.  It’s male pride.  If they had to go
through the morning sickness, the humiliation of pelvic exams, the nasty burps
of pre-natal vitamins, the sore breasts, the aching back caused by all that
weight sticking out in front of you day and night, the swelling feet, the
awkwardness, feeling your ribs and your hips being pushed apart, and someone
who thinks she might want to be a field goal kicker, practicing while she’s
still in there, not to mention the labor pains.  Well, they wouldn’t see a
whole lot of beauty in it and the population of the world would be a heck of a lot
smaller.”

Slade smiled but looked again at the picture of her in the
hospital bed, holding Tris.  “But when I look at this picture and see the love
and pride in your eyes, I can’t help thinkin’ you didn’t regret it.”

Briann stepped close enough to see which picture he was
referring to.  “What you see in my eyes was relief.  Relief that it was over.”

He turned another page and allowed one finger to trace over
the picture of her sitting in a chair probably after she had been released from
the hospital, again, cradling Tris against her.

Briann hadn’t intended to start a conversation, or to move
across the room so she was that close to him.  Watching his finger slowly
caress the picture caused her breathe to catch in her throat.  It was almost as
if he were touching her flesh.  She almost groaned and when she realized he was
looking at her, she knew he could see the way she was affected.  She couldn’t
move.  She knew she should, but she seemed frozen in place.  Or maybe frozen
wasn’t the right word.  Maybe she was melted in place.  Time ticked by.  She
didn’t move and the only part of him that moved was his thumb over the picture
in the book.  It was a gentle, tender caress.  Nothing suggestive so she didn’t
understand why she was so stirred by it, but she was certainly stirred.  Tris’
arrival saved her.  She’d actually been thinking of taking the book out of his
lap to make room for her.