Take Me Always (12 page)

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Authors: Ryan Field

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time’s sake.”

 

Kadin sighed and placed his hands on the small of Eddie’s back. “I’m sorry, kid,”

 

he said, “It’s not going to happen tonight or ever. I’m not fucking you anymore and I’m

 

not ripping your
bloodless
off.”

 

“It’s called a
bodice,
” Eddie said, reaching down to stroke his dick. Kadin didn’t care what it was called. Eddie wasn’t getting the message. If that

 

meant he had to be mean, he didn’t care anymore. But then he heard the front door slam

 

shut and the sound of footsteps crossing through the entrance hall. When he turned his

 

head to see who was in the house, Eddie was still holding him and rubbing his crotch. His

 

head was pressed to his chest and his eyes were shut. The music was still playing, and he

 

only cared about getting into Kadin’s pants.

 

And now Gregory stood in the living room doorway, holding two bags of

 

groceries in his arms, staring at them with his mouth wide open. A second later, he

 

dropped the bags on the floor and stepped back. He continued to stare, pressing his right

 

palm to his stomach.

 

Kadin pushed Eddie away and faced Gregory. “This isn’t what you think. I wasn’t

 

doing anything. He showed up unannounced and he was just leaving.” Then he turned to

 

Eddie and said, “Tell him it’s the truth. Tell him you were just leaving, and that I didn’t

 

ask you to come here.” Kadin had never cheated on anyone in his life. He’d never even

 

cheated on his ex-wife. He’d waited until after they were divorced to start visiting the

 

picnic area.

 

Eddie was buttoning up his white shirt. Most of his body was covered now. But

 

the fact that he wasn’t wearing any pants didn’t make him the most convincing source.

 

When he opened his mouth to speak, Gregory kicked the torn grocery bags across the

 

living room floor and ran out the front door. A package of pork chops landed on the sofa,

 

a can of creamed corn rolled under a side table, and a head of romaine lettuce sailed

 

through the air and fell on top of Eddie’s head. Kadin pointed to Eddie and said, “You stay inside until I come back. And turn off

 

that goddamned music.”

 

Then he ran outside to stop Gregory from leaving. His penis was still semi-erect

 

and it hurt when he ran. But he wasn’t going to reach down and hold it in front of

 

Gregory. Gregory was about to reach for the door handle, but he dropped his keys. When

 

he bent down to retrieve them, Kadin pressed his hand against the door and leaned over

 

him. “I know this looks bad,” he said, “But I can explain. Eddie is just a friend, nothing

 

more. Please don’t leave. Not like this. Let me explain first.”

 

Gregory stood up and pushed him away. He was stronger than he looked, because

 

Kadin almost fell back. “He sure is a
good
friend.”

 

“He’s someone I get together with once in a while,” Kadin said. “I’m not a monk.

 

He’s a good fellow, but there’s nothing between us other than sex. This is the first time

 

he’s ever shown up without calling. He wasn’t supposed to be here tonight. I know it’s

 

bad timing, but you’ve got to believe me.” He moved in closer and reached out to hold

 

him in his arms. “I’d never do anything to hurt you or ruin things between us. I’ve waited

 

so long to be with you again.”

 

But Gregory pushed him back again and opened the car door. “And what the hell

 

was that outfit? Is that the sort of thing you like?” He slammed his hands on the steering

 

wheel and shook his head. His face and neck were red and a huge vein bulged at the top

 

of his forehead. “God, I feel like such a fucking fool.”

 

“Ah, well,” Kadin said, “I didn’t ask him to wear
that
. I’d never ask anyone to

 

wear something like that.” He thought for a moment and rubbed his jaw. “Eddie is a little

 

different…flamboyant. He likes kinky things sometimes.” He rubbed his jaw again, deciding to keep to himself the time Eddie had worn high heels and black lace panties to

 

the motel room.

 

“Well,” Gregory said, “I hope you and Eddie will be happy with all your kinky

 

little adventures, because I’m leaving.” Then he started the car, put it into gear, and

 

pulled into the driveway so fast the back end of the Chrysler fishtailed and knocked the

 

mailbox over.

 

* * * *

 

“What happened after that?” Gregory asked. He was sitting forward on the end of

 

his seat, waiting for more.

 

But the nurse came to take him for routine blood work and Kadin had to stop

 

reading. “You can hear more later after you’ve had your tests and your dinner,” she said.

 

“That’s right,” Kadin said, “After dinner, I’ll read some more.” He was tired for

 

some reason. “And I’m going to take a nap while you’re having your tests.”

 

Gregory stood up and slowly walked to the wheelchair, which was mandatory for

 

anything involving a medical procedure He sat down in the chair slowly and folded his

 

hands on his lap. He looked up at the nurse and asked, “Did you ever hear of something

 

called a bodice?”

 

Kadin gulped with a hard swallow and looked out the window to watch the steady

 

rain.

 

“A what?” she asked, releasing the safety brake with her right foot. Her head went

 

back and her lips twisted to the right.

 

“A bodice,” Gregory said, as she turned the chair around. “I’ve never heard of it

 

either, until today.” He gripped the arms of the chair and shook his head. “Someone was wearing one in the story this nice man is telling me.” He hadn’t referred to him by his

 

name in over a year. It was always, “this nice man,” or “the kind fellow who works here.”

 

The nurse lowered her eyebrows and gave Kadin a look. He shrugged his

 

shoulders and smiled. “It’s like a corset,” he said.

 

She shook her head and laughed. “And I thought I’d heard it all around here.”

 

Chapter Ten

 

In the late 1950s, Betsy Jayne Lampnick was a plump, easygoing young woman

 

with thick ankles and lopsided eyeglasses that hung from the end of her nose. She liked

 

being a “miss.” Her tailored clothes were simple, her dishwater brown hair was always

 

pulled back in a tight bun, and she never showed much interest in men. As an architect

 

and designer, she knew she’d never become famous by creating great monuments that

 

garnered worldwide attention. But she liked to draw and she knew her limitations. She

 

deserved credit for this: she was perfectly content to spend the rest of her life drawing up

 

plans for flat strip malls and ticky-tacky subdivisions filled with identical little boxes

 

called split-levels.

 

She loved cats, but couldn’t keep one because she was allergic. If a cat so much as

 

crossed her path, her face tripled in size and her throat closed. So she collected tiny

 

porcelain cat figurines made in Japan. She kept them lined on neat pine shelves all over

 

her one bedroom apartment in downtown Atlanta. Her favorite was a white Persian with

 

almond-shaped eyes that sparkled when the morning sun hit it at just the right moment.

 

Her only other passion, besides the porcelain cats, was reading mystery novels.

 

Her nightstands were stacked with books. The novels that filled the shelves of two living

 

room walls were organized in alphabetical order, never mixing paperbacks with

 

hardcovers. She didn’t cook much; her books were stacked against the backsplash on the

 

kitchen counter and they lined the top of her stove. She read fast: three mystery novels a

 

week. But more than that, she belonged to a well-known mystery novel club and wrote

 

monthly reviews for their newsletter under the pen name Lynn Gerry. She gave her character, Lynn-Gerry-the-book-reviewer, an interesting life, too. In

 

the bio at the back of the monthly newsletter, Betsy made her a successful lawyer who

 

worked at a fictional firm in Des Moines, Iowa. And she wrote her reviews with a pithy,

 

snarky voice she never would have had the courage to use in person as Betsy Jayne

 

Lampnick, the mousy, frumpy architect.

 

When she thought about what Lynn Gerry might look like, if there really
had

 

been a Lynn Gerry, she pictured a plump woman in her late forties, with sensible shoes

 

and tweed suits—a soft, ripe tomato balanced by two thin toothpicks. She’d live alone;

 

she didn’t need a man. She’d have an expressionless face as round as the hubcap on an

 

old Ford and straight, flat black hair that showed she wasn’t interested in frilly, feminine

 

things.

 

Betsy’s book reviews boldly reflected her unyielding personal taste, and her

 

conscious—she always knew what she was doing—dislike of the male sex organ. Her

 

mission in life was to protect the world from what she considered trashy mystery novels

 

with too many sexy, smutty scenes. She loved mystery novels with strong, sexless

 

women and very weak men, and she reviewed them well. But if she read a mystery novel

 

where there was a strong, sexy male character, she verbally tore it to shreds. She took

 

passages from the book and displayed them out of context on purpose. Beneath the

 

passages, she’d write sardonic comments to make readers laugh at the author. If she

 

couldn’t find a fault in a book she didn’t like, she created one just for the sake of writing

 

a bad review. Sometimes, though she’d never have admitted this out loud to anyone, she

 

enjoyed writing the bad reviews far more than she enjoyed writing the good ones. So with all this experience in reading and reviewing mystery novels, it was no

 

wonder Betsy started to wonder about why Gregory had gone all the way down to

 

Savannah with such little notice. She’d developed a keen sense of knowing when

 

something wasn’t right, thanks to mysteries. She always trusted her instincts.

 

When she tried to phone him at the motel where he was staying in Savannah, the

 

phone rang endlessly. She called on Friday evening, and later again on Saturday

 

afternoon, but no one answered. She could have called first thing in the morning, but she

 

didn’t want it to look as if she were checking up on him. He might have misunderstood,

 

and she didn’t want him to think she didn’t trust him.

 

Gregory was the only man she’d ever met in her life that she’d even consider

 

marrying. He came from a good family, they shared a love for good design, and they

 

never argued. She didn’t want to ruin a good thing. He didn’t try to put his hands down

 

her shirt or up her dress; he couldn’t have cared less about having any intimate, awkward

 

relations with her that involved private body parts or the exchange of bodily fluids.

 

Up north, when she was still in college, she’d dated a guy who couldn’t think

 

about anything but getting into her pants. When they went to the movies, he always tried

 

to put his hand on her knee and slide it up her dress. Or he’d yawn, lean back in his seat,

 

and casually place his arm around her shoulder so he could squeeze her breast. And she

 

wanted none of that; she always smacked his hand and told him to behave.

 

But the more she turned him down, the more he tried to get into her pants. The

 

last time she saw him, they were in the front seat of his car after a dinner date. He turned

 

off the motor and kissed her on the mouth. The kissing wasn’t so bad at first, but when he

 

put his arms around her and stuck his tongue inside her mouth, her eyes opened wide and her body went rigid. She wanted to gag and spit out the window. But she didn’t back

 

away at first, because she thought this was something she was supposed to be doing. She

 

figured if she just sat there and pretended to like it, he’d get bored and stop in due time.

 

But when he gently took her soft, clean hand and pressed it between his legs, and she felt

 

his hard, filthy organ poking through the fabric of his slacks, she pushed him back,

 

jumped out of the car, and ran back to the women’s dorms as fast as she could.

 

She didn’t date anyone else until she met Gregory.

 

The only thing Betsy Jayne Lampnick hated more than a mystery novel without a

 

strong female protagonist was the male penis. With Gregory, she didn’t have to worry

 

about kissing with tongues, hot, sticky embraces, or holding a disgusting erection in her

 

spotless, delicate palm. In all the time they’d dated, he’d never once pulled down his

 

zipper and asked her to touch the ugly thing. When he kissed her, it was on the cheek and

 

not the mouth. He even suggested that when they were married, it would be best to have

 

separate bedrooms. What more could she ask for in a man? Gregory was perfect for her,

 

and she didn’t want to lose him.

 

But she was worried about this new turn of events. When Gregory didn’t answer

 

the phone at the motel in Savannah, Betsy went to see his mother.

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