Tangled in a Web of Lies (9 page)

My heart is racing, filled with anxiety as we reach our exit in West Covina. We’ve been pressing each other’s buttons for miles now. I want him, everything in my body is begging for him. I thought it would take months before I’d have a sex drive again. I guess I should have known myself better. I’ve had it bad for Odin since the first time he piled into my car.

The uneasy feeling, like the one you get waiting in line for a rollercoaster grips me. It’s like I can see the front of the line now, and part of me wants to turn around, but I can’t resist the ride. Never could, never will, that’s just the girl I am.

Odin pulls up to my condo and turns the chopper off, kicking his foot stand. He gets off first, giving me a hand when he’s finished. I pull my helmet off, and dig for my keys. It’s dark, other than my porch light, and the street lights. Odin walks me up to my door, and with each step we take my heart pounds faster and harder.

“I had a great time today,” I start, but before I can finish, Odin’s hands are all over me, in my hair, gripping the back of my neck, pulling me into him. His lips smash against mine and my mind goes silent, no reason, no hesitance, just pure desire. A desire I cannot resist. His hands move down my body, and I respond by raking my fingers through his hair and pushing my tongue into his mouth. He leans into me, until my back is against my front door, and his thick body is pressed against me. I want him so fucking bad I can taste it!

Odin’s hand moves between my thighs, caressing me through my jeans and I jump, finally feeling the hesitance I’d been expecting sooner.

“Wait,” I whisper, putting my hands on his chest and pushing him away.

Odin’s head pulls away from my neck and he gazes down at me, eyes filled with passion. Our breath is harsh, our bodies already two steps ahead of us. But I can’t do this. I want to, but I can’t.

“You can’t say you don’t want this Lila,” he says, reading my mind. He brushes the wild curls out of my eyes with two fingers and my heart explodes in my chest with the simple gesture. He’s right. I’m practically panting I want him so bad, I’m just scared.

“Your head is saying one thing, but your body says another.” Odin’s lips press into mine again, softer this time. “Have you forgotten how well I know you?” he whispers before gently placing his lips on my neck. “I know your body like my childhood home, every inch, every curve, every mark, every dark corner.” He’s driving me crazy, dragging his lips up my neck toward my ear. I’m sure he can feel my pulse racing.

“I spent days memorizing how it moves,” his hand moves to my breast, cupping it firmly before lingering down my side. “How it works, how it responds to my touch.” His hand returns to my zipper. “Don’t over think it Lila. Trust me.”

His words, his hand slipping through my zipper and pressing against me, they bring my walls crashing down. I can’t say no, I can’t say anything. His fingers take advantage of my lack of protest, stroking over my clit through my panties. I moan and just as I do, Odin sinks his teeth into my neck.
Fuck!

Odin takes the keys from my hand, unlocking the door without taking his other hand off me, he lets us in. I stumble backward on my feet, my arms draped around his neck.

He kicks the door closed behind him, and pushes me against the wall. His fingers move perfectly in unison with his tongue, tearing down the shield I’ve been hiding behind. His hand pulls back a moment, just long enough to unbutton my pants and push them down my legs. He stares into my eyes in the dark and I think he sees right through me. I take his hand, and lead him toward my bedroom, to distract him. I don’t want to talk, I want to fuck. Odin pulls off his shirt, following me through the living room. By the time we’ve reached my bedroom door, we’re both naked, leaving a trail of clothes in our wake. His hands caress my entire body, caressing every curve.

He pushes me onto the bed, and I’m so ready to feel him inside me again that I almost forget.

“Do you have a condom,” I wince as I ask, hoping to God he does. I don’t want to stop.

“For what?” Odin frowns.

“My birth control expired.”

As soon as I say it, his face softens with relief.

“Don’t worry baby, I got you.”

“Okay,” I whisper without hesitance as Odin kneels on top of me. Never in my life have I ever trusted anyone like I trust Odin. Hell, I trust him so much it’s downright stupid. His lips conquer mine again, as he gently lays me back on the bed and spreads my legs apart.

Caught up in the moment, my mind is silent. All the shit around me slips away. Every worry I have disappears, and in their place a sense of peace and security surrounds me. Odin’s hips move between my thighs. He leans on one elbow, and with his other hand, he reaches between us, stoking my clit.

“Ah!” I roll my head back into the pillow, embracing his touch and pushing my hips forward into his hand. I can feel his hardness, pressing against my thigh. I can hardly wait to feel him inside me. His fingers move in firm circles around me, making sure I’m wet and ready for him.

“I’ve missed you so much baby. I missed this,” he says, pushing a finger inside me.

I gasp, taking in the sensation I’ve been to afraid to feel since Jaime…

“You’re so wet and tight.” His voice erases my thought as he pulls his finger out slowly, and palms his erection, pushing at my entrance. “Tell me you want this as much as I do.”

I pull my head up to stare at him in the dark.

“I want you!” My voice is desperate.

He pushes into me, straining until he is all the way inside me. It’s been so long that I can feel myself stretching all over again, my body struggling to take all of him. I feel every muscle in him tense as he pulls out, and enters me again. It feels so good to be whole again. I wrap my legs around his waist, pulling him into me. With no walls to protect me, Odin takes me over.

My breathing is heavy, and I lock eyes with Odin. His face hardens, and his eyes close as I twist my fingers into his hair. He lays his face on my chest, heaving into me while I moan softly.

The way he makes love to me, it’s sensual, sweet and delicate yet so overpowering at the same time. I don’t just feel him in my body, I feel his presence in my mind, calming the sea of emotions inside of me.

“That’s it Ly, give into me baby.”

My body relaxes, and his thrusts slide deeper. He groans, burring himself in me. I lie underneath him panting, pushing my hips into his, begging for him to take me away from here. His hand moves between us, his fingers moving around my swollen clit.

I moan louder as his fingers slide over me. I tighten around him, my body beginning to fall over the edge.

“Not yet baby,” he whispers and I dig my nails into his back, pushing my head back into my pillow and trying to hold onto the orgasm about to unleash inside me. My chest rises as I gasp for breath, and Odin takes my nipple into his mouth, sucking so hard, I almost cum. But then he kisses gently, letting the pleasure seep through me slowly.

His thrusts come harder, unhurried yet deep. Then suddenly he stills, gazing down at me he whispers, “Do you remember those three words you said to me the last time we did this?”

I nod. Of course I remember.

“I want to hear you say them again.” His fingers flick over me, promising me the release I crave if I say the words.

“I love you.”

His eyes close tight and he moves into me again. I feel his fingers, circling around me. Slowly all my muscles start to tighten, the wave of pleasure crashing over me.

“Again,” he says, his face buried in my neck. His hips move forward, filling me as his fingers massage my clit.

“I love you,” I say louder this time, falling apart beneath him. My entire body spirals out of control, as he fucks me hard, pounding into me.

“Again!” he begs in a moment where I would give him anything. My entire body trembles and shakes as I cum so hard my nails draw blood on his back. My body is on fire, as my orgasm rips through me, tearing me into pieces.

“I love you!” I scream at the top of my lungs, unable to contain myself any longer.

He pulls out abruptly. In the aftershocks of my orgasm, panting in a daze I feel his hot cum spurt against the skin between my legs, leaving a slick coat of him dripping down my bottom. He pulled out, just like he promised.

I hold him tightly to me, the weight of him on top of me making it harder to take in air, but I don’t care. I don’t ever want to let him go. My fingers trace through his damp hair, and two strong arms embrace me.

After a while he shifts, moving to my side without ever letting me go. His face rests on the pillow just behind my shoulder, so I can feel his breath on my neck. I lace my fingers with his, pushing my back against him so that we are as close as we can be.

My heart knows that this is where I belong. Here, I am no longer broken. No one can hurt me here. I can’t let go of him. I love him.

In the morning I can hear Odin’s phone ringing in his pants that are still lying on the living room floor. He doesn’t move to get it. After a few more rings, it finally stops and I drift back to sleep in his arms.

Then my phone starts ringing. My pants are in the doorway, and the ring is louder and much harder to ignore. I start to get up, but Odin’s arms tighten around me, holding me in bed. My phone goes to voicemail and the room is quiet again.

“What happens now?” he asks, his voice full of anticipation. It’s easy to tell he’s lost when he’s not the one in control.

His face is full of worry, wondering where we go from here.
Where do we go from here?
I can’t be what he wants me to be. I can’t fill his need for control or pain anymore. But I can’t let him go either.

“If things are going to go back to the way they were yesterday, then I’m not letting go. I’d rather stay right here forever.”

I thought putting the distance between us was the right thing to do. I thought in the end it would protect us both. But now, as I look into Odin’s eyes and see every ounce of pain I’ve caused him by leaving, I know that running isn’t the answer. I can’t run from the only home I’ve known, his arms.

Fear grips his face when he sees the conflict in my eyes. He thinks this is goodbye again. I put my hands on the sides of his face and kiss him, promising him that I am here, and I’m not going to leave again.

“I still love you,” I admit. Slowly, I gaze up at him, hoping he’ll say it back this time.

“You have no idea how good it feels to hear you say that,” he says, pulling my face into his chest and squeezing me tightly.
You’re right, I don’t.

My phone starts ringing again, and we both sigh. This time Odin lets me out from under the covers, and I stroll naked toward the doorway where my pants are sprawled out on the floor. I dig my phone out of my pocket in a hurry.

“Hello?” I answer.

“Lila? It’s Cole. Sorry to bother you. By any chance, is Odin with you?”

I glance up at Odin who’s lying naked in my bed like a model straight out of a Harley magazine. His blonde hair is lightly tossed to the side, his arms are crossed over his chest, colored with carefully placed tattoos.

“Yea. He’s here.”

“Thank God!” Cole sounds relieved. “Next time, will you tell him to call me!”

“Sure will.” I smile, and Odin frowns, trying to figure out who I’m talking to.

“Thanks. I’m glad he’s with you. You guys have a good day.”

“Thanks, Cole. You too,” I say before I hang up.

Odin rolls his eyes, realizing it was his brother trying to check up on him. He doesn’t seem too amused either. I set my phone on the nightstand.

“Cole says next time, call him,” I tell Odin, as I climb back into bed.

We lie in bed all day, tangled in the sheets like long lost lovers trying to make up for lost time. Finally, Odin asks a question I’m not prepared to answer.

“You gonna tell me why you really left?”

I can’t keep lying, yet the truth will crush us. I shake my head, no. Maybe one day I’ll come clean about everything.

“You can’t tell me you’re in love with someone else after last night.”

“I know.”

Odin stares at me, waiting for me to explain all this, but there’s no reasonable explanation.

“It’s complicated, and I don’t want to talk about it.”

“That’s fucking bullshit, Lila.” His eyes turn an angry shade of blue. I feel like an evil cat, playing with his emotions like a ball of string, but neither of us are ready for the truth. He gets up, trying to hide his frustration by calmly smoothing his hair backwards. He heads into the living room to retrieve his clothes off the floor, and I can feel the void between us getting bigger again. I can’t let him leave, not like this. I walk towards his back while he tightens his belt around his hips shaking his head.

I wrap my arms around him, pushing my breasts against his bare back, I lay my face on his warm skin.

“You’re right, I don’t love Billy.”

“Then what the fuck is all this?” Odin turns in my arms to face me. He’s pissed and I don’t blame him.

“I just, got scared. That’s all. We moved into all of this so fast and it scared me. I’m sorry, I should have handled it differently. I thought we could take a break and start over, but I’ve realized the past few weeks that I need you. I’m sorry.”