Tangled Shadows (10 page)

Neither man moved.

Brooke’s smile died. “What’s the matter?” Her arms crossed over her chest, making a shield against them. She cleared her throat. “You don’t want to try it?” Galen rubbed his face again. “Brooke, darling, we’d love to try it, but this doesn’t feel right.”

Brooke’s heart raced. Could she tell them? “Why do you think you need to know?” Nikolai cursed. “We care for you. It’s fucking obvious something happened that damaged your sexuality, something you’re not letting go. We want to help.” Brooke swallowed. “You care for me?”

Nikolai threw his hands up in the air. “Of course we do. Haven’t we shown you every day, with every touch how important you are?” Memories of their lovemaking flashed through Brooke, the care, the tenderness, the utter commitment to give her more pleasure than she could have ever imagined. She realized they’d never excluded her. Even when they made love in front of her, it was for her entertainment and they’d pulled her in the act somehow. They’d never cuddle with her on the outside.

Her heart rate increased and butterflies danced through her stomach.

Brooke understood that in her need to protect herself, she’d been blind to what they’d showed her.

They weren’t only fucking her.

63

But what did it mean? What if she saw too much, what if they only wanted her as a friend with benefits, what if they were going through a phase?

What if?

Both men studied her in silence. Nikolai’s silver eyes still showed storm clouds, but there was a hint of worry. Galen’s blue eyes reflected the lights of the hyperspace window, but behind his calm demeanor lay a touch of vulnerability.

If she wanted more, she had to risk baring herself.

Brooke slowly dropped her arms to her side and raised her chin.

There was only one choice.

“I never knew my father, he died when I was little. My mother and I were never very close. We lived in a small community on a podunk moon, where nothing exciting ever happened. Everybody knew everybody’s business.” She clasped and unclasped her hands, her stomach churning.

“A couple of months before my eighteenth birthday I became close with one of the boys. Henry, he was a classmate. I was a late bloomer and he knew exactly which buttons to press. I fell for him hard. We started to hang out and the more we did, the more we wanted. We experimented, seeing what we enjoyed, what the other enjoyed,” Brooke began.

It was as if for a moment the universe held its breath.

Both men slumped. Nikolai grabbed her wrist and dragged her to their cabin. “I need to touch you,” he grumbled. For a second Brooke thought he wanted to make love, but when Nikolai pulled her down on the bed, spooning around her back and Galen hugged himself against her front, she understood they offered support.

Touched, she closed her eyes for a second.

“My mom wasn’t too happy about my relationship, but she knew we couldn’t do much without anybody finding out. It’s tough to do more than kiss when all eyes are on you.” She scoffed, playing with a button on Galen’s suit. “Fat lot they knew. Henry had been around the block a few times and knew all the secret hideouts. He wanted more and I thought I loved him.” Galen gave her a gentle kiss on the lips and Nikolai stroked her hair, which helped to shake off some of her anger and disgust at her naivety.

“Henry wanted sex, but we had no way to get ahold of reliable contraception without it getting back to my mom. He said we didn’t need any, but I managed to cling to a little of my common sense.”

Brooke stopped talking.

“He pushed you into anal sex,” Nikolai whispered against her neck, his arm around her waist tightened. The strong grip gave her a feeling of security.

She nodded. “It was a way to have sex without the risk of pregnancy.” When she remained silent, Galen caressed her cheek. “He didn’t know what he was doing?”

64

She snorted. “That would be an understatement. He told me he’d done it before and I trusted him. We used my facial moisturizer as lubricant and he paid no attention to me. Foreplay didn’t belong in Henry’s vocabulary.”

“He hurt you.” Nikolai’s words were a statement, not a question.

Brooke nodded. “I believed the best way to show my feelings was to give him my body, make him happy.”

“What else?” Nikolai asked when she remained silent.

She closed her eyes. “He wouldn’t stop,” she whispered, humiliated by her stupidity. “It hurt so bad, but when I told him to stop, he ignored me. Afterward he’d say it would get better if I relaxed, I was too tense.”

“
Scecxi
,” Nikolai muttered, pressing even tighter against her back.

“I was stupid. Instead of learning from my experience I believed him. I let him do it again and again. It never got any better for me.”

“You trusted him, you wanted to share yourself with him,” Galen said.

She cuddled closer. “It wasn’t so much the physical pain, but I felt so helpless. I lay there, on my stomach, and let him use me. Because I
loved
him, I handed over all control.”

The men shared their warmth, their presence soothing a wound Brooke thought she’d left behind years ago.

“Something else happened,” Nikolai said.

Brooke kept her eyes closed, the wetness behind her lids hidden. “He bragged to his friends how he was doing me up the ass. One of the old biddies overheard and ran to my mother. She freaked out and dragged me to her gynecologist to get confirmation that I was still a virgin so I wouldn’t dishonor her when I got married. Of course I was, but he confirmed the anal sex—”

“He told your mother his findings?” Galen interrupted, his body tensing. He pulled her closer. “Has he never heard about confidentiality?” Brooke laughed bitterly. “He saw it as his duty to turn me off my sinful path.

Having the doctor’s verification made my mother nearly hysterical. How could I have done something so disgusting and horrible? How could I have shamed her in this manner? There were no repercussions for Henry. I was the one everybody held responsible.”

“What did you do?” Nikolai kissed the back of her neck.

“I tried to live up to her expectations. While I was with Henry I relinquished control and let him do whatever he wanted because of an emotion. That scared me. From the moment we came back after the visit to the doctor, she couldn’t look me in the eyes without revulsion. She reiterated the fact how disgusting and dirty anal sex is every time we sat down for a meal. If something is beaten into you for long enough, part of you begins to believe.”

65

Galen kissed her, his tongue exploring and teasing. “She is wrong,” he whispered against her lips.

“I know. I’ve learned to shut out her voice and enjoy sex. Jade, over the last few days I’ve had more orgasms and fun than ever before.”

“But something about anal sex still has your mother in your head,” Galen said.

She rubbed her cheek against his chest, wallowing in his delicious sunshine scent, as she nodded. “Yes, both she and Henry ghost through my mind. It’s not something I’d expected, I thought I’d gotten over this little hitch.” She kissed both of them. “I love watching you two together.”

“But you’re scared of the actual act,” Nikolai said.

Brooke nodded again. “Every time I think I’m there, I remember the feeling of lying on my stomach, face pressed into the cover after giving up control. I see her face, hear her voice in my head. I have no idea how to push it all aside.”

“How did you get away from her?” Galen asked.

“I turned eighteen and graduated. The Merchant Academy sent a recruiter to the outposts and I signed up immediately. After I began my training as a pilot, I never saw her again.”

“Sounds like the next time we have to keep your mind busy and concentrated on us rather than the past,” Nikolai said.

Brooke grimaced. “I’m not sure it’s going to be that easy,” she mumbled.

Galen kissed her. “If you give us permission, we could push you through, ignore your hesitation and help you enjoy it,” he said.

Brooke stiffened. She was uncertain how she felt about that suggestion. Her eyes blurred. “I’m not sure,” she whispered. “Do we have to?” Galen caressed her lips. “We won’t do anything you don’t like.” Nikolai’s hand petted her stomach. “How about we throw a touch in here and there and you try to be open to it, but nothing until you’ve had time to think.” A tear trickled down Brooke’s cheek. “Do you really think connecting the three of us that way is the only way to break my shield?” She couldn’t make up her mind.

Watching them together was one of the most erotic acts she’d ever imagined, but allowing their touch would mean being helpless again.

“Not to break your shield, but to get inside it,” Galen corrected. “We don’t want to destroy it or hurt you. We need to be behind it, to see.” Another tear dropped. Nikolai wiped it away. “
Milaya
, don’t cry. We’ll find a solution. Let’s grab a nap, something we haven’t been doing very much lately.” Galen leaned across and locked lips with Nikolai. “Excellent idea. It’ll give my dick opportunity to rest and recuperate. Both of you have worn me out.” He instructed the comp to dim the lights, kissed Brooke and rested his hand on Nikolai’s hip, connecting all three of them in one of their favorite positions.

66

Chaos whirled through Brooke’s mind, flashbacks to her time with Henry, images of her mother, of the few men she’d shared her body with only to discover they had nothing in common, as well as snapshots of the last two weeks.

She couldn’t focus on one thing and wanted to crawl under the men’s skins, disappear from the universe to not have to make a decision.

“Rest,
milaya
.” Nikolai nibbled at her nape.

Brooke closed her eyes and exhaled in an attempt to release some of the tension.

Slowly their warmth seeped into her and her body relaxed. Her brain, however, wouldn’t shut up.

Nikolai moved his hand across her stomach. “Concentrate on my hand and on my voice, nothing else,” he instructed. He gently caressed her and murmured soft words.

She clung to his touch and lost herself in his rich voice.

Brooke fell asleep.

Galen caught Nikolai’s eyes across Brooke’s head.
Part of me just wants to hold her
and not have to push her where she doesn’t want to be.

Nikolai nodded.
You know we can’t let this go. We’ll be over Abanthe tomorrow. If we
want any chance to track down the slavers, we need her to remember. We may already be too
late.

Galen cupped Brooke’s cheek and stroked it.
I don’t want to hurt her.

Nikolai leaned across and grabbed Galen by the neck.
We won’t. We have close to a
day. Let her catch a nap and then we’ll drown her in so much pleasure she can’t help but focus
solely on that.

Galen’s hand curled around his lover’s wrist.
She has to agree. Nothing else is allowed.

This is her decision.
Nikolai could be ruthless when the situation called for it, but this was too important.
She has to want it.

Nikolai grimaced, but nodded.

67

Brooke woke up, her body on fire. Galen lay behind her, massaging her breasts.

Nikolai worked his way down the front of her body, nipping, sucking, kissing, hitting every sensitive spot they’d mapped out over the last few days.

Galen petted her until he reached her pussy. These two had her responding to the slightest touch. He stroked through her wet folds.

Her clit grew sensitive.

She wanted to hook her upper leg over Galen’s to make entry easy, but he used his legs to keep hers in place.

Jade, they’d torture her for hours before they’d allow her to climax. They’d done it before and she’d nearly passed out.

Galen thrust his finger inside her, making her squeak, as she hadn’t anticipated it.

The squeak became a moan. His thick finger made her toes curl. It was rougher than his cock, priming her sensitive walls.

Nikolai latched on to one nipple. Where Galen was gentle, not using the pressure she needed, Nikolai sucked her nipple as if he wanted to pull it off her breast. The line between pleasure and pain wavered, leaving Brooke uncertain on which side she stood.

Nikolai let go of the first nipple and moved on to the second.

Now Brooke experienced only intense delight.

Galen moved away a little and turned her.

Once she was on her back, he crawled between her legs, his big cock bumping her upper thighs. He didn’t continue his torture, but grabbed his thick shaft and lined the head up with her sensitive entrance. Galen thrust deep, catapulting Brooke into that pleasure-pain world Nikolai had set her up for. He gave no leeway, made no excuses, but pushed in until he hit her cervix and his balls bumped her ass.

Brooke panted, whimpered, once again not sure where delight started and agony ended.

She attempted to focus her vision when she saw his wings.

Her pussy gushed.

Every time he brought out his wings their lovemaking reached another plateau. The indescribable texture of the feathers drove every nerve ending to new heights.

She sensed movement on the bed. Nikolai had crawled behind Galen. She realized their plan.

68

Nikolai ran his hands across the wings, making Galen lose his rhythm for a moment. The bottom ends of his wings trailed along Brooke’s upper thighs, adding another layer to the sensations shooting through her.

Galen pulled out and pushed inside her in the same moment Nikolai entered him.

Both men groaned. Galen threw his head back. “Jade, this is so good. We have to do this more often.” Sweat dripped from his chest. Seeing the expression on his face drove Brooke closer to the abyss. Her vagina had adjusted to Galen’s girth and she wanted more.

“Move, damn you, move,” she moaned.

Galen had never felt anything similar. Sex with Nikolai had been amazing from the very first time. Sex with Brooke had been like racing through space. Having both of them together was beyond his wildest dreams.

He came back when Brooke shouted her demand. He grinned. Over the last few days they’d made her comfortable voicing her needs and it always gave him a little tingle in his heart to know she trusted them enough.

He moved, pulling out of Brooke and pushing Nikolai deeper. Moving inside Brooke and having her tight channel clamp down on every inch of his hard cock while Nikolai pulled out of his ass nearly made him climax. The heat and pressure of his lover’s body against his responsive wings didn’t help him keep hold of his control.

“We need to change the driver of this little group,” Nikolai growled and bit his neck. Hard. Then he grabbed him by his hips and thrust deep, pushing him inside Brooke.

She screamed.

Nikolai pulled back, moving him at the same time, to then push forward again.

Repeat.

Galen leaned forward until his hands were next to Brooke’s head and tilted his ass to give Nikolai better access. He sank deeper inside Brooke. She grew more vocal.

Suddenly he felt Brooke, experienced how his cock drilled her, keeping her on the edge of the abyss. He knew she felt Nikolai and him, what it was like to thrust into his ass and how it felt like to receive it.

This was amazing.

The pleasure climbed to another level, combining all of them.

Galen wanted nothing more than to let go, but he pushed his impending climax back and shared Brooke’s memories through Nikolai. The same wall they saw every time they caught glimpses of her memories stood to the right. For a second he wanted to explore it and discover what she hid from him. Then he remembered why he was here and attempted to find Brooke’s memories about the
Nebokka
.

He nearly crashed against a barrier. It resembled nothing he’d seen before. It had aspects of the expected Vampire magic, but there was another energy as well. Before 69

Galen could catch more details, the connection disappeared and he was back in his own mind.

“Did you see?” he asked Nikolai.

Nikolai panted, clinging to control. “Yes.” He hugged him and offered support.

Galen stopped moving, making Brooke moan. He leaned forward and kissed her.

“Hang on, we need to try again.”

She looked at him, her eyes more purple than blue and huge, her pupils dilated and unfocused. “Try again? We haven’t finished yet.”

Galen’s arms nearly gave out when she clenched her muscles around his cock.

“Brooke, focus, we’re close to IDing your mental block. We have to see it again.” Slowly but steadily she gained control. “What do you need?” she whispered, her voice husky.

Galen kissed her again, his tongue curling around hers. “What I need is to fuck both of you senseless, but before that can happen, I need you to focus on the last memory you have of the
Nebokka
.”

She pulled his head down and nipped his lower lip only to soothe it with her tongue. “I will try.”

Galen leaned into Nikolai. “Stay as close to me as possible.” Nikolai hugged him around his chest and caressed his nipples. “As close as possible,” he replied, laughter in his voice.

Galen bit his biceps, the only thing he could reach in the current position. “Don’t think I’ll let you get away with this,” he panted.

Nikolai thrust deep. “As if you have an alternative.” For a moment Galen lost all focus and crashed into the supernova of being loved by Nikolai and loving Brooke at the same time. “You bastard.”

“Not according to my family tree,” Nikolai whispered. “You need to relax and not be so tense, you make any link impossible.” Nikolai pulled back and thrust forward again, driving Galen deep into Brooke’s heat. “Stay more in the moment, otherwise we won’t reconnect.”

Nikolai couldn’t suppress his laughter. They had to enjoy their encounter otherwise a link became impossible. And as he was in the driving seat, he had to drag the other two along.

It was a tough job, but somebody had to do it.

Galen swore revenge. Nikolai knew it would never manifest, but he also knew he was right and drove them closer to the point of no return.

They’d both seen the Naema magic, an impossibility if there ever was one. Nikolai needed a better picture to figure out how it had been linked with Vampire magic, how to untangle the knot without hurting Brooke.

70

It became more and more difficult to keep focus. Galen’s wings caressed the whole front of his body, teasing and tickling him in ways he couldn’t push aside or ignore.

Nikolai clenched his teeth.

Then they were in his head and he in theirs.

Nikolai saw the mixture of Naema and Vampire magic. Despite the amazing pleasure he felt loving both Brooke and Galen, he felt his partner’s pain. A Naema working with Ferals was utterly unbearable to him, an ArchNaema and protector of his race.

Nikolai used his body to stroke Galen’s wings, gave him his strength and unconditional support. “We’ll sort it out, Galen. At least now we know what we’re up against.”

For a moment Galen leaned back into his strength, taking everything Nikolai offered.

“Guys, whatever is going on, deal with it later. For Jade’s sake, move.” Brooke’s demand brought Nikolai back to the present. He hadn’t realized he’d stopped.

“Yeah, pilot boy, how about you take charge again, before I come and take over the controls?”

They were still in each other’s minds. Nikolai felt Galen’s struggle to not let their discovery impact the lovemaking and kissed his lover’s neck. “Not a chance in the stars.

This ride is mine.”

They would have to work out the best way to overcome this mixture of magic.

Nikolai put everything else out of his mind and gave them his full attention.

He gripped Galen’s hips strong enough to leave marks and thrust. Galen drove hard into Brooke. She tried to wrap her legs around Galen’s waist, but Nikolai’s hands were in the way.

“Shoulders,” he grunted.

It took a second for Galen and Brooke to respond. In a show of flexibility Nikolai wanted to explore at a later date, Brooke pulled her legs to her breasts and then stretched them along Galen’s chest.

All three of them groaned when Galen slid deeper.

Brooke had no control over Galen’s entry and both men got a shot of her vulnerability, the feeling of being controlled.

Their connection flickered. Nikolai gathered more pictures of that barricade in Brooke’s mind, something Galen and he could work with.

The link broke.

All three of them moaned. Nikolai stopped for a second, missing the feel of Brooke’s pussy around Galen’s cock and vice versa.

“Finish this,” Galen groaned.

71

Nikolai took a deep breath. Every time they’d come close to flying through the stars something dragged them back.

No more.

He rode Galen with no hesitation. He reached around his lover to grab one of Brooke’s hands lying on Galen’s biceps. She returned the pressure.

Brooke’s whimpers gained in volume, becoming more like screams. Galen’s groans turned to bellows. Her nails dug into Nikolai’s hand as she came closer and closer to her point of no return. Sweat dripped off their bodies and the temperature in the cabin resembled a supernova.

His balls drew up. He knew he was so close he wouldn’t hold on much longer.

Neither would either of the others, but to make sure, Nikolai moved his free hand to Galen’s left nipple and pinched. Hard.

Galen bellowed his pleasure and pushed back, driving Nikolai deeper. Feeling Galen enclose the whole length of his cock was the last straw. He pulled back and thrust all the way, pushing Galen deeply into Brooke.

They all exploded. Nikolai felt as if he flew through a hyperspace window without a ship. All he had to cling to in this whirling vortex were Galen and Brooke. For a few heartbeats the pleasure eclipsed everything else.

Once he regained control over his limbs as well as feeling in said limbs, he carefully pulled out of Galen. Despite wanting nothing more than to drop facedown on the bed, he stumbled to the bathroom to clean up.

He managed to wet a towel and take it back to the bed. Galen and Brooke lay side by side. She only grunted at him when he cleaned her. Galen was mostly asleep and didn’t respond to his ministrations. Nikolai dropped the towel, crawled into bed and curled along Brooke’s other side.

When they woke up, he and Galen would have to untangle the mess of magic, but for now he had the two most important people in his life in his arms.

Right now, that was enough.

Brooke exhaled and cuddled closer to Galen and Nikolai. Their scent and presence surrounded her like a favorite blanket.

They’d seen the barrier and had to know of a way to get her memories back. She was so close to finding the truth. Her emotions ran amok inside herself. Brooke struggled to make sense of her feelings.

On the one hand meeting this Vampire and Naema had been an eye-opener. She hadn’t realized how far down she’d pushed her need for love and companionship, always pretending she didn’t want or need anybody.

Seeing Nikolai and Galen together had broken through her wall. She wanted to be their third, the center of their love.

72

She snorted. On the other hand, they’d kidnapped her, told her Ferals messed up her mind and she had to open her shields, which would risk both of them seeing her need.

In her mind and heart, the last was the biggest problem. The thought of them reading her feelings and realizing how deep they’d crept into her heart only to gently let her down would be unbearable.

Nikolai nibbled on her neck. “Stop thinking so hard,” he murmured. “You’re making my head hurt.”

Brooke leaned into his caress. “How can my thinking hurt your head?”

“I can feel your brain turning over and over and it’s giving me a headache.” Brooke frowned and turned around until she lay face-to-face with him, Galen still sleeping at her back. “What do you mean?” She tried to stay quiet to not disturb Galen.

Nikolai smiled and kissed her. “We have a connection,” he started. “It’s not yet strong enough for us to get behind your shields, but we can sense your emotions.”

“We?” Brooke no longer cared about disturbing Galen.

“Yes,” Galen’s husky voice made her shiver. “Both of us. If you tried it, I’m sure you could get a sense of us as well.”

“How much can you read?” She swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry.

Nikolai studied her.

Galen cuddled closer and stroked her shoulder. “Calm down,” he whispered.

“Brooke, we can’t read your mind, we only get a sense of the emotions.”