The Accidental Courtesan (31 page)

Eva smoothed the blanket so high around Noelle that it almost completely covered her sister's green gown. Noelle glowered and slid the blanket back down to her waist. It was too warm in the room, and her sister had somehow decided burying her was an excellent idea—as if doing so would help shake off Noelle's last lingering headache.

“You are smothering me,” Noelle told her. They were so close together that only the different colors of their gowns showed where one ended and the other began. “Perhaps you can throw open a window, Sister?”

Eva remained tucked to her side. Instead, Gavin moved to do her bidding and cracked open the sash, letting in a late-day breeze. Noelle sent him a grateful nod. He winked back. She warmed under his regard.

They hadn't been left alone for a moment since Eva and Martha had gotten their hooks in her that morning. She was deeply disappointed. There wouldn't be a repeat of the bath under this roof. So she had to satisfy her lust by drinking in his presence with her eyes.

He was dressed entirely in black, except for his white shirt and charcoal waistcoat. His hair was carefully combed back, though it looked on the verge of falling over his forehead, as was its wont. When he was mussed up, he looked very dashing, like a pirate on the sea. Today he was formally handsome. He'd taken the time while Eva was dressing Noelle at Crawford's town house to change and shave. Afterward, Eva had bustled them so quickly to Collingwood House that Noelle hadn't had a chance to thoroughly examine the cut of his manly figure. Clearly he didn't need help getting dressed. Even his cravat was in perfect order around his neck.

Eva dropped a sugar lump into Noelle's teacup and stirred the tea vigorously. Noelle shot her a frown. “I can stir my own tea.”

Eva smiled patiently. “You have endured a trauma. You must be careful not to suffer a relapse.”

With the blanket tucked around her and Eva hovering, Noelle felt like an invalid. She'd been on her feet no more than an hour after her bath and nap when her sister kidnapped her. She'd endured the coach ride, an elaborate meal, endless questions about her head, and general fussing. She hadn't had a chance to speak to Gavin privately or to advance her seduction. Now she was trapped with Eva, and there was nothing she could do but suffer her sister's ministering.

Noelle turned her eyes to Gavin and silently begged him for help. He shrugged. Nicholas followed suit with a similar gesture, and Noelle encompassed both handsome men with a scowl. Obviously, neither of them would come to her rescue and face the wrath of the duchess. They chose to remove themselves to the fireplace, where it was safe.

“It isn't as if the footpad thumped me so hard he cracked my skull and my brain matter is leaking out.” Noelle reached for a plum cake and took a vicious bite out of it. She chewed the flaky pastry and scowled at Eva. Her sister's patient smile never wavered. “I am fine. I just need a day or two to rest.”

Eva leaned back against the cushions. “I will be the judge of your fitness.”

Noelle simmered. Not only was Eva treating her as if any slight movement would shatter her into tiny shards of glass, but by stealing her from Gavin, she'd destroyed any chance of Noelle becoming his courtesan. Gavin wouldn't dare sneak into Collingwood House and abscond with her or risk an unwanted marriage.

It was difficult enough to have been left virtually unchaperoned for several days with Gavin. Martha and Mrs. Hill hardly qualified as proper watchdogs as far as Eva was concerned. Noelle wasn't completely certain Eva wasn't planning a wedding anyway. Her sister had an unreadable expression in her eyes whenever she looked from Gavin to Noelle. If that was what Eva was plotting, Noelle had to keep vigilant.

No wedding. Not today, not ever.

After what he'd done to her in the bath, she very much looked forward to the next lesson. She didn't need wedding vows to share in such delights. Spinsters lived by a relaxed set of rules, and as long as Noelle kept her relationship with Gavin private, she was free to indulge her passion. Eva had come in and ruined her ruination. And she wasn't happy in the least.

Noelle looked over to the men and discovered they were no longer concerning themselves with the women and were focused on other matters. They were speaking about ships and trade routes while drinking brandy and casually loitering in a pair of high-backed chairs.

She'd always thought Nicholas the most handsome man of her acquaintance, with his dark hair and nicely filled-out frame. His brooding nature had been difficult to warm to at first, but since finding love with Eva, he'd become an excellent brother-in-law. Caring, amusing, charming, devoted.

However, now she found she much preferred lighter hair with a touch of sun, easy teasing laughter, and the lean, muscled frame of her future lover. Though Nicholas was a cut above dandies and puffed-up society princes, she had eyes only for Gavin. She cared not if he was in trade or found working for a living an honorable pursuit. It was his rough edges that kept her enticed and hungry for his kisses.

Gavin chuckled at something Nicholas said, and Noelle watched his blue eyes light up. The tension he'd been suffering over the last few days eased in the safety and comfort of Collingwood House's drawing room. No band of thieves would dare harm Noelle here.

He turned his eyes to her, and suddenly she understood why he hadn't insisted she stay under his care. Gavin could have fought Eva, and won, if he'd wanted to keep her. But he knew very well she would be safer with the duke and duchess. In more ways than just worrying about the thieves, he was protecting her from himself. He wouldn't be tempted to take her innocence if she wasn't always underfoot. And from previous experience, he was
very
tempted.

“I made the right decision,” Eva broke in. Noelle turned to find her sister looking keenly at Gavin. “With the blow to your head, I knew you wouldn't be able to make a clear and rational decision where that man is concerned. You look at him as if he is covered in cream and strawberries and you haven't eaten in weeks. It was only a matter of time before you gave in to your desires and ruined yourself.”

Ruined herself? Of course she wanted to ruin herself. That was entirely the point. A point best kept to herself.

“I am not a child. I'm older than you.” Noelle's voice was louder than intended and drew the attention of the men. She turned pointedly away and lowered her voice. It didn't take shouting to show her displeasure. “If I choose to take a lover, it is my choice.”

Eva sipped her tea, then lowered her cup to the table. “I agree. I am not one to judge. Nicholas and I were lovers before we wed.” Eva's eyes softened as she looked at her husband. “However, I'm a courtesan's daughter, and you are gently bred. You have to live by a different set of rules.”

The love in Eva's eyes made Noelle's heart ache. When Gavin couldn't come up with a single happily married couple who were devoted and loyal to each other, Noelle could. Nicholas would give up a limb rather than ever look with lust at another woman. If all matches were so happy, Noelle wouldn't have such qualms about marriage. Unfortunately, they weren't. Eva and Nicholas were the exception.

Her sister continued, “Your connection to Mister Blackwell is built on the excitement of this game. Now, I am not saying you wouldn't find Mister Blackwell attractive in a dull setting, too, so do stop scowling. However, you need to look at the situation rationally. A few days ago you were determined to dry up like autumn leaves in your spinsterhood, and now you want to take a lover?” Eva shook her head. “If Mister Blackwell can get you to give up that notion and take you to be his wife, not only will I accept your choice, I'll push you into his bed and lock the door on my way out.”

Noelle stared, surprised. Not too long ago her sister and she had shared the desire not to wed. Now Eva was happily matched, Margaret was happily matched, and both had turned on her, determined to find her a husband she could love.

It didn't matter what she wanted.

“I want what's best for you,” Eva added. “And I want you to make the choice with a clear mind.” She reached out to close her hand over Noelle's. “And I want you to be safe. I need you.”

“I need you, too.” Noelle patted her hand.

“Then it is settled.” Eva nodded. “You will do as I say and keep away from that man. He is troublesome.”

Noelle frowned. When, exactly, had she consented? “I never agreed to do any such thing.” She blew her breath upward and fluttered her hair. “When did you become so disagreeable, Sister dear?”

Lately Eva had become a grumbling bear. Even the maids fled when they saw her coming. It was an odd change. The staff of Collingwood House adored their new duchess. They usually ran to her, not away. Something was amiss, and it didn't entirely encompass Eva's concern for her. She'd been unsettled for several weeks, since before the necklace caper. “Where is the sweet sister I have grown to love?”

“Sweet” would not be the best word to describe Eva, and they both knew it. Contrary, stubborn, loyal, opinionated, fearless, beautiful. Sweet was Margaret. She was the opposite of Noelle and Eva in temperament. Well, truthfully, opposite in every way.

Eva's eyes welled as she peered at Nicholas. Noelle was taken aback by the sudden rush of emotion. Was the marriage not as happy as she'd thought? Was he mistreating Eva? If he'd harmed her sister in any way, there would be serious consequences.

She shot her brother-in-law a dark glower. He grinned.

“If you continue to dice up my husband with daggers in your glare,” Eva said, “our child will come into this world fatherless.”

Noelle gaped as the comment took a heartbeat or two to sink in. “A child? You're having a baby?”

She let out a squeal and jumped to her feet. In seconds the sisters were clutching each other tightly and crying. Noelle pulled back, smiling. “I cannot believe you're to be a mother.” She sniffed and hugged Eva again. “What a difference a year can make.”

Nicholas joined them, and Noelle hugged him, too. There was none of the stiffness usually associated with a ducal title between him and his new family. Too much had happened in their recent past to stand on formality.

When the initial fuss settled, the duke put an arm around his wife. They beamed at each other as if the child was the greatest gift ever accomplished between two people. And it was. The child would be adored by its unusual little family.

“I will be an aunt. Again,” Noelle remarked softly. Margaret was days away from giving birth. Soon there would be two babies to love.

Noelle was stunned that, along with her joy, there came a sudden rush of sadness. She'd never know what it felt like to hold and love a child of her own. It wasn't something a spinster could do without the baby being born a bastard. Until this moment, she had never truly considered what she was giving up when choosing not to wed. A baby. Gavin's baby?

Involuntarily, her eyes went to Gavin, who stood just outside their small family group. He was looking at her with an odd expression.

Could he see the aching need in her eyes? He'd never bed her if he knew that deep inside, she was wishing his seed would find a fertile home in her womb. Just as quickly, she felt somewhat ill at even considering the notion of purposely wishing him into fatherhood. And Noelle would never want a bastard's life for a child of hers.

Her womb would remain barren.

She coughed, hoping to hide the tears rising behind her lids. “Excuse me. All this excitement is overwhelming. I need some air.”

Noelle felt three pairs of eyes on her as she fled the room, down the hallway and out the front door.

Dusk was settling, giving the sun a respite behind the horizon. The brisk, damp air of a brief earlier shower hit her flushed face with a slap, and she inhaled deeply. The scent of wet leaves and damp grass was pulled into her lungs as she gasped past the overwhelming desire to cry for a child she couldn't and wouldn't ever have.

What was wrong with her? Not once had she ever longed to be a mother. Not until a few minutes ago. Watching her mother live with her unhappiness in marriage and, truthfully, in motherhood had long quelled any desire to make her own family. Why had this changed the instant she'd discovered Eva was with child?

She was thrilled for her sisters! She was! Then why was there a crushing burn of envy in the pit of her stomach?

Noelle rubbed her arms and bowed her head in shame.

Behind her the door opened with a muted creak. The booted footfalls crossing the narrow porch toward her were not Eva's. She didn't need to turn around to know it was Gavin. How easily she'd grown capable of feeling his presence, even when she couldn't see him.

His coat brushed against her back as he stepped close and his hands came down on her shoulders. She closed her eyes and lowered the side of her face onto his knuckles.

“Your sister is worried you've taken a turn.” He eased her back against him and slid his arms around her. “I had to convince her it was the heat of the fire you were suffering from, lest she call for the physician.”

There was understanding in his voice. He, too, had learned to read her emotions. At the moment she needed him, he'd come to her again. Her rescuer, the man she loved.

“I am excited for them, I truly am.” She felt the need to explain herself. She didn't want to be selfish. “The last year has been overwhelming.”

Noelle felt adrift. “It was always Margaret and me together. My mother never wanted much to do with us. Our nanny was the woman who raised us. Mother saw us only as extensions of our father, and rarely spent a moment concerning herself about our welfare.” Noelle leaned her head back, and he put his chin on her head. “I knew about Eva for years and wanted to meet her. It was bumpy at first, but I grew to love her. We are three sisters now.”