The Barter System (30 page)

Have you ever told anyone else about
this fantasy?
 

Yes, but the ex wasn’t impressed, kept
saying she had to pee and to let her go.  I got bored and went to watch
football at the bar.       

Have you attempted to realize this
fantasy in your daily life?
 

I haven’t since Malina.  Doesn’t seem
worth the effort for blue balls.

How have you utilized the Internet in
your sexual life?
 

I can get into chat rooms.  Someone said
some of those people are probably guys, but honestly, sometimes the Johnson
just needs to go, and if they word the dirty stuff right, it works.  I usually
don’t have too much trouble getting dates, being a cop you get groupies who’d
fuck anyone with a badge.

For the first time, Riya
allowed one subject to read the details of another.  Lucas was behind her,
rubbing her shoulders as she leaned on him.  “Riya, tell me honestly, what made
you choose this guy for your subject?  Can you remember?” 

She nodded and laid back on
his chest, “He’s still in love with his ex-wife.  I want to check out the
situation.  Based on his essay, I’m fairly certain she’s still in love with him
too.  But she’s angry.  My…presence tends to wake women up.”  She shrugged.

“Baby, are you leaving men
matched
up
behind you?”

She considered carefully,
“Not really, not intentionally.  Sean was emotionally locked down.  Most like
my dad, going from one relationship to another.  His assistant wanted him but
he didn’t want to risk hurting her.  I wanted him to be open to possibilities.” 

Riya smiled softly, “When I
got to Victor, he was so gentle and kind, so I really paid attention to the
women in his orbit, and how everyone reacted to me being around.  Sure enough,
his little sister’s best friend has loved him for years.  Turns out he’s loved
her too but didn’t think he was good enough for her.  I set him up and watched
her knock him down.”

A little snort of laughter. 
“Joshua is in love with his roommate.  She’s bisexual and she thought that was
the only reason he was interested in her.  They suffered silently for two
years.  I…um, I…removed some questions there.”

Lucas pulled her to the side
to look at her, “Riya, are you saying you were with your subject and the
bisexual woman he was in love with?”

She nodded and chewed on her
lower lip, “I’m there to get past boundaries and, you know, blocks and stuff.”

“Damn…it is incredible how
hot that is.”  He told her with a sly grin.  “Naughty, naughty.”  He kissed her
then noticed she wasn’t meeting his gaze.  “Riya, are you going to try and fix
me up with someone too?  I’m not jumping from sleeping with you to…no, wait, I
absolutely didn’t mean that the way it sounded.  I mean, I’m too attached to
you to…well, shit, that isn’t what I want to say either.  Can you tell me why
you’d play matchmaker for me and apparently every other man in this project?”

Riya wasn’t sure what to
say.  “I don’t want you to be alone again.  I’m frightened for you to sink back
into sadness and the rut you fell into before.  I…I couldn’t stand it. 
Couldn’t bear to have you hurting again,” she finally answered quietly.

He hugged her, “Oh, my sweet
loving Riya.  I can’t ever get that low again because you’ve changed things for
me.  I’m alive again.  I know emotionally I need to interact with people and
leave this ranch.  I won’t undo all your hard work, baby.”  He kissed her temple
and the side of her mouth, stroking his palms up and down her arms. 

“So what you’re telling me
is you leave each subject feeling sad and half-broken yourself, put on a happy
face and move on, leaving them emotionally fixed and fixed up behind you.  That
has got to be the kindest, most unfair, thing I have ever heard.”

“No, I don’t have any
business being sad.  I’m doing this to myself.  None of you should have to
suffer with me.”

He took her laptop and set
it on the side table, pulling her around until she was straddling his lap,
“Riya, I swear to God, I don’t know where you come up with this stuff.  You
have every right to your feelings.  You do nothing but take your subjects’
feelings into consideration.  And I will swear on a stack of Bibles none of
your subjects have suffered.  You give, you do not take.”

“I’ve taken from you,
Lucas.  So much.” 

He looked at her for a long
time, his hands holding her face, “No baby, we helped each other.  I want to
keep you forever, but that isn’t what’s best for you.  I know that.  I hate it
but I know it to be true.  You are filled with youth and light and laughter.  I
would love you hard and make you happy, but you wouldn’t be doing all the
things you’re meant to do.  It would be alright for a while, but eventually,
some of your beautiful light would dim and you’d be sad.”

His thumb stroked her bottom
lip, “You aren’t the type to ever admit that, to ever hurt me if it came to
that.  You would take it all on your own lovely shoulders and you’d suffer. 
So, I’m going to let you go, watch as you spread your wings, and become all the
things you’re going to be and I’ll know I had a part in that.  Eventually, I’ll
be able to love someone else because of you.  I will never, ever regret you
being here and letting me love you for a little while.  Sharing your light and
love and laughter with me.”

Her eyes filled with tears,
“I don’t want to go, Lucas.”

“A part of you never will,
Riya, and a part of me will always be with you.”  He loved her, filling her up
with his steady strength because she was filled with sadness and doubt.  “The
man who claims you one day will be the luckiest and happiest man on the planet,
don’t you ever question that.  You’re going to make someone so happy, and have
babies, and love hard, Riya.  I want that for you.  I want you to want that for
yourself.” 

As he slid inside her, he
gave her everything he had and took what she offered until it was late
afternoon and they heard cars pull up outside.

Chapter
Fourteen – The Police Officer

Last week of September…

Lucas drove her to the
airport and she was shaking the whole trip.  His sons were in the back seat. 
“Baby, there’s a car picking you up and taking you to the hotel I booked, I
want you to stay there for at least two days and get yourself together.” 

She nodded and stared out
the window, watching with a sense of panic as the ranch faded away.  “I need
you to call me when you get to the hotel.  Alright?”  She nodded again. 

“Riya, you have to breathe
and relax.  Baby, look at me.”  She shook her head.  “Riya, look at me,
sweetheart.”  Finally she did and he smiled at her.  “Breathe, baby.  I promise
you it’s going to be fine.”  She was about to draw blood on her lower lip, she
was biting it so hard.  He smoothed his thumbs over it.  “Oh, Riya.”

His sons were in agony for
them both.  They started firing questions at her one after another until she
was able to answer them without her voice breaking.  “Riya, can you tell us
what South Florida is like?  We’ve never been there before.  You grew up there
your whole life, didn’t you?  Hey, that Fantasy Fest thing in the Keys, is that
as freaky as I’ve heard?  What does your dad do?  You work with his company,
too?  What’s your favorite food?  Where all have you visited on vacation?  Have
you been to Disney like a thousand times?” 

And on and on and on the
entire way to the airport.  When he saw she was calming, not shaking, Lucas had
never wanted to hug them so hard in their lives.

They pulled into departures
and he checked her luggage for her.  He’d booked her flight first class.  He
wasn’t having her crammed against other people when she was this fragile.  A
car was picking her up in LA and taking her to the hotel where she was booked
for two nights but he made sure they understood to let her stay a month if that
was what she needed and to keep charging his credit card. 

He held her by the shoulders
and gazed into her shimmering hazel eyes, “Riya.  Be the woman I know you are. 
Hug me and get on that plane.”  She held him hard until she started to tremble. 
Somehow she managed to let him go and turn away.  It looked like she was
holding her breath as she walked woodenly away. 

Lucas got in the passenger
seat of his truck, letting one of the boys drive.  They waited and watched her
through the glass as she walked to the escalator leading to the second floor
gates. 

When she doubled over and
clutched her stomach, he had the door open, Robert’s hand on his shoulder. 
Then she stood up and wiped her face.  She rubbed her heart hard and stepped
on. 

“Go, quick, get me out of
here,” Lucas said roughly and then his sons watched as their father did
something they’d never witnessed in their lives. 

He cried…and whispered her
name.

Riya didn’t remember the
flight, other than the attendant bringing her a box of tissues.  She never made
a sound, but everyone around her bore witness to her pain. 

When they landed in LA, the
attendants and fellow passengers let her get off the plane first.  Making her
way to baggage claim, there was a man holding a card with her name on it. 

She never spoke to him but
tried to smile.  He got her bag when it came around and led her to the car,
where she cried what she prayed were the last of her tears. 

The driver watched her in
the rearview mirror, struck by her beauty and sadness.  When they arrived at
the hotel, he helped her check in and carried her bags to her room, telling her
everything would be okay.  Later, when Lucas called him, the driver asked if
Riya had recently lost a loved one. 

“Something like that,” Lucas
told him quietly. 

Riya called him after she
showered and he wanted to go get her.  Instead, he soothed her and made her
laugh.  She told him she’d called Tawny and had some much-needed girl time.  He
told her Becca and Sharon had already set up a huge out-on-the-town night with
everyone they knew and he didn’t much appreciate her matchmaking. 

For a moment, she almost
lost it, then pulled herself together and told him how sorry she was for all
this.  “Okay, Lucas, we’re going to stop talking right now.  I’m going to call
you in a few days because I need to know you’re all right.  I miss you.” 

When she hung up she felt
well and truly broken.  Tomorrow she was going to meet her next subject and had
no idea how the hell she was going to get through it.  Lucas had more of her
than any of the others and now he was alone.  It made her hurt.

She soaked for hours,
staring into space.  When there was a knock on the door, she took a long time pulling
on a robe and going to get it.  Barely cracking the door, it was Tawny who
stood there with her arms open. 

Riya fell into them
gratefully.  

Determined to have her way,
Tawny made her contact Ricardo and tell him she’d be delayed a few days due to
a family emergency.  He completely understood and told her not to worry about a
thing. 

The best friends watched
movies, went to the spa, and ate ice cream. 

Mostly, they talked.  Tawny
made her start from the very beginning, raising her eyebrows when she gave her
more details about Joshua and Jessica.  “Very cosmopolitan, Riya.  I had no
idea you had all this spunk.  We could’ve caused much more trouble over the
years!” 

As she talked about her time
with Lucas, Tawny listened and knew her dearest friend had gotten in way over
her head with this project. 

After a full day with the
person who knew her best, Riya started feeling more like herself.  Like she
wasn’t flying apart inside. 

They were sitting by the
pool the next afternoon, Tawny asking general questions, when Riya told her
about Amelia, Victor’s sister.  Everything suddenly clicked in her mind.  She
went still, considering options, weighing possibilities.  Knowing she was on
the right track, she headed back to her hotel room and called Shay.  They gabbed
for a long time, Tawny making suggestions in the background.