The Bathrobe Knight (34 page)

First he was Captain, and then he was Boss. Now he’s Lord? Should I expect there to be a church of the Bathrobe Knight soon?
she grumbled. She didn’t want to admit she was mostly upset that these added titles likely meant less time Darwin would spend farming with her and more time he’d be trying to drag her on some town-related quest where the Boss might not even fight back.

“Yeah, might as well,” she finally said after a moment. She had just spent a good bit of time merely getting here. There was no reason at all not to go find Darwin now that she had arrived. Especially not just because he had become Lord Onion Knight, slayer of bunnies and Bears.

“Alright. This way,” he said, leading the way to Darwin.

When they finally got to Darwin, he was in a large room almost half the size of the kitchen, with a map of their island, albeit slightly incomplete and missing many key details, sprawling the full length of the wall to her right when she walked in the room. Darwin was sitting in the center spot at a long stone table to her left with six others while only one person was on her right with the map.

Wow, this is way more professional than I had expected,
she thought, admiring the scene as she walked into the room with Justin.

Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at her as she walked in.
Ugh, this reaction is like when you have something in your teeth and no one wants to tell you.

Darwin was the first one to break the silence, “Gentlemen, no need to be shy. This is Kass.”

Huh, gentlemen, not ladies and gentlemen? Oh! I see!
Kass thought, just noticing that no one in the room was a woman besides her. This was two sexist remarks and fifth of scotch away from being a Mad Men set.
He started a new Faction, and he’s already installed the glass ceiling.

“I owe much of my success to her, so please treat her with respect,” Darwin continued. “And Ren, could you get Kass a chair before you continue?”

“Yes, Lord Darwin,” he said, setting a colored paint brush down and rushing off into another room to get her a chair.

She was about to stop him and say she would get her own, but they were all stone and she wasn’t exactly sure how heavy they were.
Is lifting giant stone chairs easy for Demons? Or is it just easy for people who aren’t specced fully into the Mage stats.

“Darwin, want to catch me up to speed? What’s going on?” Kass asked, deciding not to wait for the chair to arrive before asking all the questions she had for Darwin.

“We’re planning out a strategy to keep the people safe during the expedition we’re about to launch,” he said, looking at the door behind her to see if the man was back with the chair.

“You’re about to launch an expedition?”

“As soon as the preparations are made. Hopefully within the hour, but I won’t hold my breath. We’ve hit a rather big snafu I’d like some help with if you don’t mind. I can’t have any of my people getting killed in the journey. It wouldn’t be right after all they’ve been through.”

“Your people? Is it because of the Creation Stone? If that’s why you’re the Lord, and I helped get the Creation Stone, does that make me the Queen?”

“Queen? You mean Lady, right?” he corrected her. “If you want to be the Lady we’ll probably need to get around to a first date, don’t you think?”

“Still dreaming there, aren’t you? If you want a date, you’ll have to learn how to ask properly one of these days, Darwin,” Kass sassed back.

“Oh, us old men can’t get caught asking children out on dates,” he said, smiling wryly.

“I am not a child!” she burst out, momentarily forgetting that everyone in the room was paying attention to their banter. She sniffed, her nose high in the air. “I am the Lady here even if you won’t recognize my rightful title.”

“If you say so . . . anyways, we have business to do here,” Darwin said, wearing a half grin. “Are you going to join us, or will you need a few new names first?”

“I’m in--that is if you actually have seats open for women.”

“Don’t blame me. I didn’t make a game where women don’t like politics or join the military,” Darwin divested himself of the guilt. “That’s all on the game makers. These are just the closest we have to the people who were in charge of Valcrest.”

“Sure, sure, so what’s the thing you need help with?” Kass asked just as Ren returned with her chair.
Wow, he really is carrying that stone chair like it’s a feather.
“Protecting people from dying, you said?”

“Yes. That’s right. This map,” Darwin began, pointing at the map on the wall, “is the limited knowledge we have about the island. The problem is, that on this map there is only one port, and it’s in the center of the White-Horn territory.”

“Why is that a problem?” Kass asked as she sat down and folded her legs, obviously not catching on to why this was such a dire issue. “The ports are usable by all Races, aren’t they?”

“Kass, the Humans are at war with the White-Horns still,” Darwin said, leaning back with one arm folded across his chest and the other covering his mouth with a pensive frown. “Even if the port is usable by everyone, getting to the port will still force us to march through the White-Horn territory. There is a good chance we’ll be forced into a skirmish. Even if we win the skirmish easily, there is still the probability of someone dying.”

“Well, there is another option,” the man on Darwin’s right, whom Kass could only assume was Alex, said, “We could always ignore the harbor completely and build our own ship.”

“No, that won’t work, Alex. It would take too long to finish the boats, and that would set us back farther than I’m comfortable with.”

“But it could save lives if it means avoiding any fights altogether,” he made one final attempt.

“It could cause entirely new problems that might end lives,” Darwin frowned, then waving Ren back up to the map, said, “Anyways, Ren, you were telling us of your plan before you were interrupted.”

“Yes. My plan is simple, if we’re going to lose lives, let them be seasoned fighters who volunteer. If we cut this path through the dungeons and defeat the crossing bosses then we can shave a day off of our time and bypass the White-Horn’s front cities and forts. From what I remember of the scouting reports we’ve collected over the years on the White-Horn army, they like to keep their armies in well-defended forts around this line.” Ren paused to draw a line across the map. “This means they can respond to threats quickly from the outside, but it also means that if we pop out of the mountain here, there won’t be any large scale forces capable of catching us before we reach the harbor. They’ll be counting on the crossing Bosses being too difficult to clear, and I don’t think we’ll lose more than one or two soldiers to those.”

We wouldn’t lose any if it was just me, Fuzzy Wuzzy, Darwin and a few of the Turtle-Wolves.
Kass thought, scrunching up her face.
Why risk a soldier when we’ve got all these red-eyed Zombie thingies to soak up damage and die in their place? Darwin could probably build an entire army of them before we reach these mysterious crossing guards, and then even Fuzzy Wuzzy wouldn’t have to risk his life.

“What?” Darwin asked, noticing Kass’ face.

“Huh?” Kass responded, not used to being called out for thinking. It took her a second to realize why he had asked her what. “Oh, just I think Ren’s plan is good, but you’re making this way more complicated than you have to, Oh Great Spoon Lord.”

“Hmmm . . .“ he started for a second, returning to his thinking pose. “I don’t think I am. I think I know what you’re suggesting, but there is one problem.”

“What’s that?” she asked.

“You won’t be able to stop Blake, Alex and some of the other Guards from volunteering. Even if the Zombies could die for them, they’ll still demand to be on the front lines. They want to fight for their future, not just be given it,” he said, turning to the Guards. “Am I wrong?”

“Not at all, your Lordship. We’re with you whether you like it or not.”

“My blade hasn’t tasted blood yet,” the one on the other side of Alex responded. She couldn’t remember all of their names from one meeting.

The mention of blood, however, triggered Kass’ memory and reminded her of why she had stormed all the way here.

“Oh yeah! DARWIN! What in the heck?! I heard you killed a bunch of people near here? How could you?” She stood up and began gesturing angrily with an open hand. “What on earth could possess you to turn yourself into a murderer! I thought you would know better than that!”

“That wasn’t his fault. It was mine, Lady Kass,” Alex answered, standing as well and giving her a stern face that could make a rock look soft. “That group was responsible for killing friends and family of mine as well as other people in this town during the confusion of the raid. Justice demanded they die and die quickly.”

Kass’ anger faded instantly, and she was only left with regret for not asking his reason first. The group that died would at most be inconvenienced an hour or two. The NPCs would forever be short their loved ones. Kass was stuck with a weak frown across her face trying to find the words to say she was sorry for jumping to a bad conclusion when Darwin stood up this time, and everyone else stood as soon as he did.

“I think Ren’s plan is good, but Kass is also right,” he began saying as he walked to Kass’ chair over by the door. “We should bring some of the fodder up front and build a force to take damage off of us during the fights with these crossing Guards. If anyone has an issue with that, say so now.”

No one said a word.

“Good, now everyone, you have one hour to organize your groups at the entrance of the mine,” he continued. “Once you’ve done roll call and double checked your lists, do it again; we’re not coming back, so we better not leave anyone behind.”

“Yes, Lord Darwin,” Ren said, and the group of them shuffled past Kass and Darwin at the door.

“So, I’ve asked everyone else, but are you still with me?” Darwin said when everyone had left. “Do you want to join my new Faction, the StormGuard Alliance, and travel across the world with me?”

Her instinct told her to answer
yes
immediately, but it also told her to be careful. There were still a lot reasons to join though and very few not to. If she didn’t join, she’d be stuck looking for a party and having to take the long way off the island.

“Do I get to be an officer?” she questioned, pretending to mull over the decision longer than it actually took her.

“I don’t know. Haven’t even picked out Rank titles or people for the ranks yet,” he admitted, obviously dragging his feet on any of these type of commitments.

Can’t make any promises? That’s sure different than the politicians who lie and promise anything you want to hear.
She thought, happy that he was better than most people she knew in power.
I guess it won’t be so bad joining up.

“Alright, well, no promises on staying, but I’ll join for now,” Kass said, reasoning that the closer she was to Darwin, the more EXP she would get and the more she’d find out about this mystery. “Also, I better see that Lady Rank eventually,” she added, still intent on becoming the Lady of Frost for as long as she was with the group.

• You are being invited to join the StormGuard Alliance, would you like to
  Accept
  or
  Reject
  ?
  

   
Accept,
she answered, sure of her choice.

• You are now a member of the StormGuard Alliance.
  

“Welcome aboard, Kass. Now let’s get prepping,” he said, giving his first full smile since she had entered the room. “I wasn’t kidding about wanting to leave in an hour.”

“Yes, milord,” she answered, giving him an overly exaggerated and sarcastic curtsy. “Right away.”