The Best Friend (6 page)

With a smile, Gretchen patted Leila’s back. “Hi Leila.”

Leila shook her head and beamed brightly at her. “It’s been way too many years.” She pushed Gretchen away and surveyed her from head to toe. “My God, you merely grew even more breathtaking. You were a lovely young girl, and now you’ve grown into a stunning woman. Although, I always knew you would.”

She blushed. “You’re a tad prejudiced.”

“And you are still clueless to your loveliness, which is, perhaps, the best part of you. Now come in, come in. I can’t believe you are all here again.”

Vickie was quickly introduced before they were inside the family home Gretchen remembered so vividly, and which she found barely changed. They were the type of parents who kept things neat as a pin, but never so much as moved a single candlestick, or restacked the myriad books on their shelves. Continuity was valued here. Leila was the only one in the kitchen besides Will and Jessie. It was a bit disconcerting to walk in and find Will standing with one hip against the counter. Almost a déjà vu. How many times, probably hundreds, had she found Will in this same kitchen, leaning casually against that very counter?

But this time, however, his wife stood beside him and he had a toddler huddled against his legs, wobbling precariously. Gretchen’s heart swelled for the briefest moment before it passed, and Jessie burst into a great big smile of warm greetings. She even stepped in front of Will.

Gripping Gretchen’s arms, Jessie hugged her fiercely. “Gretchen. It’s so good to see you. It’s been way too long.”

She clasped Jessie in a sincere, heartfelt hug. Oddly enough, Gretchen felt a rush of protective instinct towards Jessie. Jessie was only twenty when she first met her. That was when she was the most tragic, lost, broken person Gretchen ever knew. Despising her for marrying her ex was at the bottom of the list of things Gretchen could have felt about Jessie. Gretchen had seen the ragged scars from when Jessie cut herself in order to deal with the abuse she had to endure daily. Gretchen oversaw Jessie’s long, slow, laborious journey and when she returned to the first semblance of health. Something even Will did not share with Jessie. He never saw how Jessie struggled to learn how to channel her overwhelming grief and emotions in a positive way, and without slicing her own skin. He didn’t see her using rubber bands or ice, instead of razor blades, to substitute for what she really craved to do. Gretchen and Jessie’s sister, Lindsey, took her to an inpatient treatment facility to start. Later, she went to a new home to live and work, but all the while, continued her intense therapy. As far as Gretchen knew, she was still going to therapy. There was simply no room for catty jealousy or envy between Jessie and Gretchen.

Additionally, Gretchen gave Jessie’s beloved sister, Lindsey, a place to recover when she was on the run from her abusive husband. Jessie almost revered Gretchen for all of her generosity in a way that was sometimes nearly embarrassing to Gretchen. Jessie saw Gretchen, who was a full eight years older than she, as a mother figure in some ways. Nevertheless, Gretchen knew Jessie’s needs were not her fault, so there was just no way to blame her or even dislike her.

As they were hugging, Tony suddenly appeared at the top of the stairs that led up from the basement. He stopped at the entrance and met Gretchen’s eyes, which immediately became locked in a profoundly heated exchange. He was glaring at her.
Why?
She couldn’t begin to comprehend this new Tony. His gaze finally shifted from her eyes to land on Jessie.

Jessie leaned back finally, but still clasped Gretchen’s hands. Quietly, she said, “I know this is weird. Me being here. Our daughter…”

Gretchen smiled easily. “I came to visit you and Lindsey last time, remember? So stop. Now, it’s time you met my sister. Vickie? Come here and meet Jessie, Will’s wife.”

Gretchen turned and nodded to Vickie to step closer, but Vickie stood back, staring daggers at them during the entire conversation. “Will-fucking-Hendricks,” Vickie murmured as she came closer.

“Vickie.” Gretchen admonished her sister. Will stiffened behind Jessie and put a hand on her shoulder. He knew how Vickie felt about him. Before they finally divorced, when things were sliding downhill, Vickie more than once expressed her utter disdain for Will.

Jessie merely broke into a huge grin. “Not a fan, I take it. I think this must be the first time that ever happened.”

Gretchen felt the tug of a grin at Jessie’s unoffended reaction to her sister’s insults. Vickie eyed her up. “Hmm, well you might not be so bad. I’m Vickie.”

Jessie laughed out loud. “Hi Vickie, it’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s weird you’re here, you know that, right?”

“Vickie! Let it go,” Gretchen enunciated slowly.

“Well, too-nice Gretchen never sticks up for herself,” Vickie said as she rolled her eyes.

Jessie merely nodded. “So weird… but your sister saved me and my sister’s lives, despite me marrying her ex. So for me, she’s about the most wonderful, kind, amazing woman alive. We’re agreed on that. Anyway, that’s why I’m here.”

Will groaned out loud. Gretchen’s blush started in her neck and covered her face instantly. “You two, please just say hello to each other.”

Jessie glanced around with a grin. “Why not? It’s true. That’s what Vickie’s so worried about. Why should the second wife be here? I have to agree. But I love Gretchen, so I wanted to come and see her again too.”

Tony finally shuffled forward, alerting the others to his presence. The group turned towards him and a thick silence finally fell between all of them. Leila suddenly came around the counter, smiling nervously as she stood between them.

Gretchen’s heart seemed to stick in her chest.
Oh God!
It was so startling to see him. Shocking. His hair was clumsily pulled back into a low ponytail. The errant strands of it were tucked haphazardly behind his ears, and it was well past his shoulders. He wore sweats again. Not even a pair of jeans for the company he expected tonight. A t-shirt and a sweatshirt rounded out his casual attire. His empty sleeve was pinned against the side as usual. Gretchen’s emotions churned in her gut like a knife twisting inside her. His empty sleeve was all her eyes could see. And she had the wrong reaction. The typical reaction. The every-other-asshole kind of reaction. It was not supposed to be
her
reaction, but she found it so hard not to be that way.

Tony’s beard was also distracting and truly changed his entire look. She licked her lips and forced a smile as she swiped her hands on the slacks she wore. She was more nervous than she could remember being in years, an odd reaction to having dinner with the closest friends she grew up with. She had attended important meetings during her career with colleagues, school board members, patients, parents of patients, and any number of situations that put the spotlight on her, and for which she was in charge. But this occasion, here, right now, greeting the one-armed Tony Lindstrom, had her stomach in knots.
Why?
Why was her reaction to seeing him so swift, so brutal, and so wrong? She was behaving completely wrong around Tony. He deserved having her step forward to hug him and chat. Or act even remotely normal. But her tongue seemed to swell in her mouth and her mind went completely blank. She could not figure out how to respond to him.

She had no clue how to act normal with a one-armed Tony.

Jessie stepped forward. “It’s been a long time, Tony.”

She held out her hand, and Tony stared down at it before looking up into her eyes. Jessie met his without flinching. He reluctantly gave her his hand.
His only hand.
“Yeah, hey.”

She smiled. “You know, you helped save my life once.”

He pulled his head back in surprise. “How the shit did I do that?”

Leila cleared her throat as a warning, and Jessie smiled. “You sent Will my letters. You can’t know what that meant to me. I’m sure he never explained why we asked you to do it… I just wanted to thank you
for
doing it.”

He shrugged. It mattered very little to him, or so it seemed. Gretchen had to bite her tongue. Did he have any idea about the magnitude of grief Jessie poured into those letters? Gretchen never read them, but could easily imagine. They used Tony as a go-between in order to evade Jessie’s controlling, abusive father.

Will put his hand out next, and Tony had to grasp it in return or look like a complete jerk. Then he stared at Gretchen. She swallowed and stepped closer. Straightening her back and bracing herself, she tried her best to quit reacting so completely inappropriately toward him. She was freaked out by the obvious changes; but for the first time in her life, couldn’t seem to get over it. The thing was: she didn’t know why she got so upset by what happened to Tony. She licked her lips, and forced out another smile before stretching her hand out to touch his, which hung loosely at his side. He nearly flinched with surprise before his eyes narrowed and he glared into her face. She gulped down her anxious nerves.
Steady.
She had to be steady and normal when she spoke.

“Hello Tony. It’s so nice to see you again.”

There. Her voice didn’t tremble. It sounded like her usual tone. She sounded almost like she was the thirty-five-year-old adult she was supposed to be.

He discreetly jerked his hand from hers and nodded, “Gretchen.” Then he turned away from her as if she were no more than a passing stranger. Her utter surprise at his slight was swift. He really disdained her.
Why?
He didn’t know about the inner conflict she was having just to face him; so why did he act so weird with her?

Will and he started speaking, although Tony’s tone sounded half as polite or interested as Will’s. Leila pulled the women into the kitchen and initiated a conversation, bouncing between all of them. She wanted to first catch up on Gretchen’s life and learn how she knew Jessie. Soon, Tony’s father, who was even taller than Tony, came in with his distinguished, quiet way that Gretchen fondly remembered. He embraced her warmly.

Donny burst inside in a rush. He was carrying a box, which contained the dessert. He carefully balanced it on his hand as he hugged everyone, pausing briefly when Gretchen introduced him properly to her sister. Vickie went strangely silent at his unannounced entrance, something Gretchen felt pretty sure she’d never seen Vickie do.

Dinner was a casual, easy-going affair served at the table. It consisted of pork chops, salads, beans, and rolls. Leila was an expert cook; and the meal, as well as her table setting, were as inviting as Gretchen remembered from her youth. The conversation was lively and mostly centered on catching up with everyone’s lives, and going back at least a decade. Anecdotes and stories were rehashed with humor and sentimentality. Except for anything about Tony.

The excruciatingly oppressive elephant in the room was back. It was hard for Gretchen to not try and sneak glances and peeks at Tony. He could not cut his own meat, so his mother leaned over and silently did it for him. He never lifted his eyes from the utensils she used. It was awkward for anyone to pass the various dishes to him. The heavy bowl of salad made his forearm tremble under its weight, although he still managed to pass it along. Gretchen felt waves of dizziness overcoming her as she repeatedly spotted the empty armhole. 

Donny was a lifesaver. His easy-going charm and stories kept the conversation light and effortless, going from topic to topic. He eagerly encouraged everyone to participate, except Tony. Tony didn’t say more than three words, if Gretchen counted correctly. Vickie, too, was strangely quiet. That was unheard of. She almost reached over and checked Vickie’s pulse.

After they all pushed away from the table, Leila, Jessie and even Vickie were in the kitchen, cleaning up the dishes. Gretchen was still tidying up the table when she heard Will speaking directly to Tony.

“So what the hell are you doing now?”

Tony ran his hand over his beard. Donny froze. He was about to pour ice water from the pitcher into his glass. Tony’s father, Lewis, stiffened as Tony shrugged carelessly. “What the hell? What am I doing? Living with this.”

He gestured by lifting the affected shoulder up.

Will cleared his throat. “Yes, I know that. But what do you do all day?”

Tony’s fierce gaze could have stopped a missile. “Do you think anything about my life is easy to do after this? It tends to keep me pretty busy just doing everything you take for granted.”

“So… you don’t work?”

Tony’s scowl deepened the lines around his eyes. “I told you: I’m on disability.”

“Nothing? Nada? You don’t get up in the morning and have anything at all to do?”

“Will,” Gretchen’s tone was low and her warning not very subtle.

Tony glanced at her, and his eyes appeared blank. She had no idea what he was thinking but saw the twitching muscles around his mouth. Everyone else was quiet too and observing the conversation. It felt like the group was collectively holding their breaths in anticipation. Tony’s jaw worked back and forth, but he finally muttered, “No.”

“Why?”

“What do you mean ‘why’?”

“Why don’t you do something? How good can it be to do nothing? Or not to be accountable for anything? Or anyone?”

Donny slid his chair out, leaning back as he crossed his arms over chest. “Will has a point. It’s doing you no good.”

Gretchen stepped back away from the table, horrified they were having this conversation
now
and in front of her.

Lewis swiveled his head between his sons, and nodded finally too. “Well, now, guys, you just don’t know what it’s like. You don’t have to live with it. We do. Leave him alone.”

That was a shock. Lewis still ran his plumbing company. After forty years in the profession, he showed no signs of slowing down. It surprised Gretchen he couldn’t see any need for Tony to do something too.

“That’s exactly the problem. We left him alone for so long, he thinks he’s entitled to do nothing. Or even act courteous anymore.”

Tony’s gaze shot up and pinned her. She stepped back again before freezing. She felt like she was caught in a sniper’s sights. She didn’t know what she should have done or said, much less, why he was glaring at her when she hadn’t said anything. He finally stood up slowly, pushing his chair back.