The Bucket List (14 page)

"Of course they can. Everyone has that one true love and then they have the love of their life.
Corey is Rae's true love, but if he doesn't wake up she'll end up with the love of her life."

"That doesn't make sense. That's the same thing, true love and the love of your life."

"No it isn't. Some of us never meet our true loves, you know the one you always imagined with all the traits you've always dreamed about, the one who's one hundred percent perfect. We meet someone else who has most of the things we're looking for and some we hadn't even imagined, but they aren't our one hundred percent and we settle for them. We might not think we're settling, but we are."

"That's rubbish.
No one is perfect."

"That's true, but someone who truly loves you will never see you faults. You're like superman, you're perfect," John mused. "
Corey thinks Rae is perfect and she completely adores him. But I think she will fall in love with someone else."

"I've never looked at it like that. It makes a bit of sense, I suppose. When did you become such an expert?" she teased.

John looked at the brunette and gave her a shy little smile.

"I don't know. I watch people, I guess."

He cleared his throat a bit and said, "So... have you ever been in love?"

"I thought I was in love once, you know heart beating fast, struggling to breath and all that. Turned out it was just indigestion! The man turned out to be such a prick,"
Alyssa said. "How about you? I know Corey teases you about it a lot."

"I don't fall in love with them," he argued. "I guess it's just the romantic in me that so wants to believe there's someone out there for everyone, so I keep trying."

"Even when you get burned?"

"Even then," he answered. Then he cleared his throat again. "Would you like to go for a drink or a meal when we land? No, wait... you're probably tired...maybe we could just watch a movie... if you want to. Unless you just want to sleep... not with me, with yourself... I mean in your room, just you... not with me... you know, coz you're tired..."

Alyssa chuckled and put a hand on his arm to stop him.

"I'd love to go for a meal with you when we land," she smiled.

"I bought you some coffee. It's the horrible machine stuff but I thought you needed it."

The goofy smile left her face to be replaced by the cold look he'd been given all morning. Then she just turned from him and walked back to her seat.

As he watched her, he realised it had already started. She was drifting away from him. She'd never let words come between them before, not like this. True, he'd never said the words he had said to her before. He didn't know where they'd come from. Any man would be lucky to have her in his life, he'd always thought that. He knew about a million men who'd love to have her permanently in their lives and their beds.

With a sigh, he followed her to take a seat right next to her. He'd have to corner her on the flight, she'd have nowhere to run then and she'd be forced to listen to him.
Nate had been lucky, he had sex to help him win his case. All he had was lousy coffee.

I'm telling you Dave, she was with him all morning," Brian told the man he was sitting next to. "And you saw them together last night at the show, didn't you?"

Dave pretended to leaf through a magazine. He was still seething from the little show Nate and Rae had put on and now Kendrick had just revealed something bigger. How could she sleep with him then kiss him up after like they were some sort of couple? She'd told him she didn't do shit like that, that when it was over, it was over.

"When I went into the room, it was like I was invisible. She got out of
Nate's bed completely naked to find her clothes. And I'm pretty sure she wasn't wearing any underwear when she walked out of that door!"

"So she just walked out, no kisses no cuddles?" Dave asked.

"No. Nate kept shouting for her to let him explain something but she walked out without a word."

A little smile formed on his lips as he buried his face in the magazine again. Obviously things weren't as cosy as they seemed. He didn't want to think that she'd just sleep with him and not give him a chance then the very next minute she's in a relationship. It galled him that she'd slept with
Nate, of course, but obviously, that was what it was. It was like she'd said, she didn't do relationships. So he'd work on her until she decided he was worth another chance.

He'd come to that decision the night before when he'd been struggling to sleep. Rae had only occupied his bed for a few hours but that had been enough to ensure she would haunt it forever. Even though they were in different cities night after night, in different beds, he was sure images of her would follow him wherever he went. He couldn't explain it. Making love to her had been liberating. He had thought, as old as he was, he knew it all, but Rae had shown him some things, taken him to places he never knew existed. He had never experienced that before, not even with his ex-wife. So he had decided he would pursue her until she lay in his bed again.

He wasn't prepared to let her go.

***

"I was jealous."

She had been taking one final look at the city, knowing she would never set foot in it again. She hadn't heard what
Corey had said.

"What?"

"I said I was jealous. I still am, actually."

Corey
was looking down into his orange juice like it contained something too interesting to look away from.

"Jealous? Why would you be jealous?" she frowned.

Corey let out a sigh and put his drink down.

"I've always been able to depend on you, you're my biggest fan. I wouldn't have accomplished most of the things I have if it hadn't been for my little cheerleader," he answered, still not looking at her. "When you do find what you're looking for, you're going to be cheering for someone else and I'm selfish enough to not want that. I wanted to keep you to myself. You've been mine since you were one. I can't handle the thought of letting you go."

"Corey..."

"Let me finish," he cut in. "I know that's childish, but that's how I feel. I don't want to call you at three in the morning and have some guy tell me to call back in the morning because you're asleep. I don't want to have to watch if the way I touch you
is appropriate. I don't want things to change. But I love you and I'm going to stand by you. There should never have been any question on that. I've been standing by you your whole life. I'm sorry I said what I said. I just didn't know how to handle it. Any guy you choose would be lucky to have you in his life."

"
Corey, I know things will probably change, but you're always going to be the most important person in my life," she said as she took his hand in hers. "I'm not going to let some guy come between us."

"You say that now, but when you do fall in love you're going to think the sun shine's out of this guy's ass. He's going to be the most important person to you and I'll be just
Corey, the guy you grew up with," Corey said, finally looking at her. "I've made my peace with it. I'll be happy with whatever makes you happy. Just don't forget all about me, okay?"

He was the biggest reason she was there but she couldn't tell him. Sure, she was looking for a little taste of what she could have had, but no man would ever come close to taking
Corey's place in her heart. He was too important to her. He was the only person in the whole world who knew every single detail of her life, all her fears, her secrets, her strengths and her weaknesses, her joys and heartaches. No matter what they said about love, she didn't think anyone could ever become that important to her that she would forget what Corey meant to her.

"I'll never forget about you,
Corey," she whispered, lifting her palm to his face. "You mean everything to me. Whatever happens from here on out, just remember that."

She meant that in a completely different light. Once she was gone, he would realise the true meaning of her words.

Corey took her hand and kissed her palm.

"I really am sorry. I can't stand you not talking to me," he said. "Well, you spoke to me last night but I don't think that counts."

"I can't remember anything past my first drink."

"I didn't think you would. For someone who likes their drink, you're a pathetic lightweight!"
Corey chuckled.

"I didn't take all my clothes off in public again, did I?"

"You say that like you wouldn't have enjoyed it if you had," Corey laughed.

"That was the old Rae. The new one won't be taking her clothes off for anyone but
Nate."

"You walk around the hotel room in nothing but your underwear! I'm sure that counts as taking your clothes off."

"Yeah, but you and John don't count."

"Thanks!"
Corey said with mock sarcasm.

"You know what I mean."

"I do," Corey smiled. "So I saw you with Nate earlier. You two sorted your issues out?"

"More or less," she replied, thinking about her wild morning. "I have to give him an answer soon."

"If he ever treats you bad, you know you can tell me, don't you?"

"I know," she smiled. "You always have my back."

When they checked into their room in Albany, Corey and John had to head straight out as they had an appearance somewhere in town before the house show. She had hardly spent time with them since she had arrived; quality time, that was. Pulling in a noisy club or following them around in an arena didn't really count. Now that she'd settled on her 'someone' she should really make time to spend with Corey. The last thing she wanted was for him to feel like he wasn't important to her anymore. She didn't have much time left.

She was lying on the bed, thinking about the events of the past few days and how she'd made quite a bit of progress, connecting with
Irving and Nate. She'd expected it to take her at least two weeks, then a couple of weeks after that, she'd be jetting off. So now she'd bought herself an extra week of playing princess.

With a weary sigh, she reached into her bag and pulled out her list.
The dreaded bucket list. It only had about 96 things on it. Somehow she'd thought by the time it really mattered it would have a few hundred things on it, maybe even thousands since she'd always thrived on living in the fast lane. She hadn't sat down and wrote all 96 things down at once, she'd just added them on as she went along. Then after her little trip to Columbia, when she had finally surfaced from her drug induced haze, she had added the last, most important three.

Corey
would be so cut up when she finally had to go. It had always been just the two of them against the world, doing whatever the hell they wanted. Everyone had known that wherever she went, Corey was always somewhere nearby. Until their careers had taken off, they had been joined at the hip. Her heart was already breaking at the thought of leaving him behind, she could only imagine how he would feel, living with the pain of his loss for the rest of his life.

Her phone rang, breaking into her morbid thoughts and she was pleasantly surprised to see
Irving's name on the caller ID.

"Hey,
Irving," she answered.

This was the first time in their
ten year relationship that they had spoken on the phone.

"Hi, Rachael. How's it going?"

She looked down at her list, thankful he couldn't actually see her.

"
All right. How are you?"

"A bit tired, actually. I'm going to have a break soon, though, in about two months and I thought I'd go on vacation somewhere. Maybe you can come with me. It will be a good way to bond."

She didn't have two months. Her heart cracked again as she thought how much she would have loved to spend some time with him. It was her fault she was in this position. If she hadn't been such a stubborn cow and wasted all those years...

"I... I'd love that," she said with fake excitement.

"Good. Why don't you come visit me this weekend? We could make plans. Sara's dying to get to know you."

She almost laughed at his choice of words.

"Sure, but not the weekend," she answered. "We were going to go home on Thursday but I can catch a flight to Austin tomorrow then fly home Friday."

"That would be great, Rae. Just let me know when I should pick you up at the airport," he said. "So are you planning a party or something? I know what you young ones are like."

She knew what he was referring to. Her twenty-sixth birthday. On Saturday, she reached that milestone and for once in her life she wasn't throwing a party. Well, in her case, they usually turned out to be wild orgies. Some years, the festivities had been known to last a week, then it would be Corey's birthday and they'd start the party all over again. Of course, now it depended heavily on their schedules. With Corey as the Champion, he couldn't take time off whenever he pleased.

"No. I'll just force
Corey to take me out for a meal or something. I don't feel like partying."