The Casual Rule (18 page)

“I told you, cupcakes are healthy,” I insist.

“That’s what you claim,” he says skeptically.

“Ben, Julia’s had a not-so-secret love affair with cupcakes ever since we were kids,” Allie jokes.

“And Allie has had a not-so-secret love affair with all things male.” I throw a crumbled cupcake liner at her.

“True. Very true.” She laughs, ducking the flying object.

As the night goes on, I find myself marveling at how easy it all seems to come to Ben. He’s sitting here talking to my friends like he’s known them his whole life. I can tell they like him. Then again, what’s not to like?

Fortunately Allie and the guys have gone easy on me. I was expecting some ribbing about the loud sex in front of Ben. But I think after watching me pick up the pieces from my last disastrous relationship, they’re just happy I have someone in my life. Even if he’s with me for just a little while.

Ben catches me sneaking a quick peek at him while he’s talking with Peter. He truly is a beautiful man. And he’s mine… for now, anyway. Our eyes briefly lock and he smiles.

I have to admit; I can’t help but feel a pang of jealousy watching Marcello and Peter. It’s obvious they love each other. They’re so opposite, but fit together so perfectly. Peter is always so attentive and loving to Marcello. Marcello may talk a good game, but there’s no doubt he adores Peter. They’re committed to each other, not like me and Ben…buying time until we get bored and move on.

It’s a sobering thought.

But I know this is what I need to protect myself from getting hurt. Another heartbreak would slay me. The last one almost did. This no strings arrangement is the only solution for me. Besides, the sex is fan-fucking-tastic. I didn’t know sex could be so intense, fun, and steamy at the same time. It must be this way because we’re free. We’re here by choice, not under the guise of an obligation. Freedom, that’s what makes it so good.

“Hey. Are you okay?” Ben whispers in my ear.

“Fine. I’m fine.” I smile warmly back at him.

“You looked a million miles away.”

“I must be coming off my sugar high,” I say.

He laughs. “Crashing, huh?” He rubs his hand up and down my back, playfully snapping my bra strap. Nice to know this bra is still on his mind.

“Apparently cupcake rushes are short lived.”

“Oh, quit the whispering,” Marcello complains. “Peter and I are going to the Central Park Zoo tomorrow. Would the two of you like to join us?” Typical Marcello. I just finished telling him that Ben and I are not a couple, so naturally he invites us out on a double date. I’ll have to skate around this.

“Isn’t it a bit cold for a zoo visit?” I ask, glaring at him. His eyes widen as he realizes his faux pas.

“He’s dragging me there.” Peter rolls his eyes.

“You could be more supportive, my darling. It’s part of my research,” Marcello explains.

“What are you researching?” Ben asks.

“Tell him, Sweetheart.” Peter smiles, shaking his head, looking very entertained.
This should be interesting
.

“I have a theory that all flamingoes are gay,” Marcello explains.

“Oh, he told me about this. It makes perfect sense. Tell them,” Allie agrees. Her endorsement tells me what we’re about to hear will make no sense at all.

“Well, I read that a flock of flamingoes is called a flamboyance. When I read that, I thought, they must be gay. I knew I had to see it in person.”

“You know that makes no sense at all,” I tell him.

“That’s exactly what I told him,” Peter adds.

“You’re just a bunch of naysayers,” Marcello dismisses, waving us off.

“I think I’ll pass on the zoo visit. But thanks for the invite,” I say.

I peek over at Ben and he’s smiling, a genuine panty creamer smile. Between his dimples and the adorable laugh lines on the sides of his eyes, I may need to jump him right now. My God, he’s so incredibly sexy. I love my friends, but go the fuck home already.

~o0o~

After about two hours of wine, cheese, cupcakes, and a lot of laughs courtesy of Marcello and Allie’s theories, everyone decides to call it a night.

“Anytime you want your portrait taken, I’m you’re man. Maybe something special for Julia, like a boudoir shoot,” Marcello slurs, wiggling his brows.

“Come on, Sweetheart. The wine has compromised your filter. Good to see you, Ben.” Peter drags Marcello out the door.

Allie says her goodnights and stumbles into her bedroom leaving me and Ben alone. I turn to him and he wraps his hands around my waist.

“I like your friends,” he says.

That’s good. I hate yours.

“They’re a little crazy, but they’re the best,” I agree.

“Looks like I’ll have to take a rain check on that shower.”

“You could stay over if you want,” I suggest nervously.

“I have a training session. It’s very early. Rain check on that?”

“Sure.” I shrug one shoulder up.

He holds me tight; his hands slide under my sweatpants, landing on my ass.

“You like to rest your hands there, don’t you?”

“They’re Roman, remember?” He chuckles as he caresses my butt.

“Roman or roaming?” I ask sarcastically.

“Both.” He laughs. “I had a good time tonight.”

“Me too.”

“We’ll do this again soon?” he asks.

“Hopefully without the audience.”

“Good night, Julia.” He leans in and kisses me.

“Good night.”

He turns and leaves. I watch him step into the elevator from my doorway. He sees me and winks. I wave shyly then close the door. Once inside, I lean against the door and sigh.

Chapter 9

I wake with a stage two hangover, fuzzy and no doubt a little stupid, but at least I won’t puke. Drinking wine on a cupcake dinner probably wasn’t the brightest idea. I need to hydrate. Slowly, I drag myself out of bed and head for the kitchen.

“Good Morning, Sunshine. Where’s Ben?” Allie chirps, peeking over the opened refrigerator door.

“He left last night.” I open the oven and take out the dirty dishes I hid last night, placing them back in the sink.

“Why? It looked like you were having fun.”

“We were. He was meeting his trainer early. He had nothing to change into.”

“Oh, that’s right. He’s one of those exercise freaks. Are you bummed?” she asks with a sympathetic smile.

“I don’t know. Maybe a little.” I shrug half-heartily, trying my best to look blasé.

“Well, another time, maybe.” She closes the refrigerator door with a carton of orange juice in her hand.

“I guess so.”

“He seems like a nice enough guy. And he’s hot as hell.” She points to the carton of juice. I nod. She grabs two glasses and pours the juice in each.

“He is.”
You should see him naked.

She hands me a glass of juice. “He’s really into you.”

“You think?”
I hope.
I take a big swig of my juice. This is exactly what I needed. Now I want coffee. Or better yet, a greasy burger with a side of gravy fries.

“Jules, his eyes were glued on you all night.” She stares at me with her eyes wide and her mouth slightly parted… A look we affectionately refer to as her “DUH” look.

“I don’t know.” I know
my eyes
were on him all night.

“I do,” she says confidently, leaning back against the kitchen counter.

“Can I ask you something?” I look down into my glass of orange juice, twirling it in my hand.

“Sure. Anything. I’m an open book.”

“Was it weird that he didn’t make any plans to see me today? I mean, it’s Saturday. He didn’t mention he was busy or had plans of his own.” I fiddle with the top button of my flannel pajama shirt, a little hesitant to hear her answer.

“It doesn’t always work like that. In my experience, you pretty much go with the flow, take it as it comes. Pardon the pun.” She takes a quick sip of her orange juice; frowns then tilts her head. “You’re not getting romantic feelings for him, are you?”

“What? No.” I shake my head, wrinkling my nose.

“Julia, are you?” Her voice is stern as her eyes widen.

“No. I’m not. It’s just I thought we had fun last night… in my room.” I clear my throat. “I…I was hoping to have more fun tonight.”

“So send him a text.” She waves her hand dismissively.

“It’s not that easy,” I answer, defeated.

“It’s exactly that easy.”

“What if he says no?”

“Then he says no. It’s going to happen sometime. I thought you understood… you can’t have expectations from him, just like he can’t have any expectations from you. You don’t clear calendars for each other. He’s not your boyfriend. He doesn’t owe you anything, including room in his daily life. If you’re both available at the same time and feel like getting together, you do.  If one of you is busy, it’s no biggie. That’s the beauty of your arrangement. Are you having second thoughts?”

“No, not at all. I like the way things are.”

“Jules, listen to me. I’ve known you forever. If you feel you might get attached to him emotionally, get out of this now. I don’t want to see you get hurt down the road. That friend of his may be a bitch, but there’s some truth in what she said. Guys like Ben are great while it lasts, but they aren’t wired to stick around for the long haul. There’s always an expiration date in this kind of relationship. There’s no
if
it will end, eventually it
will
end, you need to accept that. That’s the way these casual flings are designed. If you’re looking for forever, I’m afraid you’re looking in the wrong place.” She leans toward me, glaring directly into my eyes.

“I’m not,” I insist, placing my glass down hard on the counter with a louder bang than I intended. “I appreciate your concern, but I swear… the last thing I want is a romantic relationship. I like the way things are. I was just wondering, that’s all. Don’t read any more into my question. I was just curious. I need a better understanding of the rules of no rules. Okay?”

“Okay. Good.” She lets out a long breath. “So are you going to call him for some horizontal time?”

“He’s pretty good vertically too,” I gush. A flush creeps across my face.
I can’t believe I just said that.

Her hand flies over her mouth and she snickers. “Why Julia Conti, you saucy little vixen. I think we better start stocking up on some cranberry juice.”

“For what?” I frown.

“With all the action you’re looking to get, we need to take a preemptive UTI strike.”  

I laugh. “Thanks for looking out for my health.”

“That’s me. Dr. Allison Lewis, Crotchologist, at your service.” She laughs as she salutes.

~o0o~

I can do this. When that bitch Cam-eel pissed me off, I sent Ben a text looking for a good time. Then again, I was angry,
and apparently spiteful
, so a lot less thought went into my texting. I really want to see him again tonight. Ben is addicting. He does things to me. Good things. Naughty things. Wildly naughty things. He makes me swoon, actually swoon. He makes my toes curl until my nails feel like they may break skin. I’d be crazy not to be addicted to that.

Screw it, I’m a modern woman, and there’s nothing wrong with wanting sex. Ben certainly didn’t mind when I made the first move last night. Isn’t that the point to our whole arrangement anyway? When you want it, you tell the other person. There’s no drama or nonsense. My doubts are complicating something that was meant to be uncomplicated. That’s the appeal of our arrangement… it’s straightforward and easy.

There’s no room for feelings. It’s just lust and sex. And I’m pretty damn comfortable with that combination. I like sex with Ben. Simple.

I pull out my cell phone, hold my breath and go for it.

*Hi. Are you busy tonight?*

I tap my fingers on my knee nervously watching the minutes tick by on my cell phone’s clock. Where is he? Is he thinking up an excuse to politely ditch me? I need to stop allowing my imagination to get the better of me. He’ll answer. After the longest fifteen minutes of my life, my cell phone finally pings.

*Parents back in town tonight. Rehab visit & late dinner after with them.*

I believe him. I know his parents were out of town and his grandmother is in rehab with her fractured hip. His answer is certainly plausible. Damn. I was looking forward to getting some. Like Allie said, I can’t assume that it’s always going to happen. Well, this sucks.

Just as I’m trying to remember if I have fresh batteries for some one on one time with BOB tonight, my cell phone pings again with another text from Ben.

*This afternoon?
*

My body instantly tingles. How the hell can he have such power over me with a two word text? I don’t want to look as desperate as I know I am. I wait three long minutes to text him back.

*Your place? 2:00?
*

I know Allie is around. And the way I’m feeling, things may get a little noisy.

*See you then.*

Afternoon sex… It’s been a long time.

Come to think of it, I don’t remember the last time I had sex in the daylight. I can’t count the quickies in Mikehole’s dorm room when his roommate was in class. You could hardly call that sex anyway. There was nothing sexy about it… and it was always about him. S
elfish bastard.
It was like a quick prodding with a cocktail wiener; you barely taste the meat, leaving you feeling unsatisfied and hungry for more. All bump and grind, never any passion. By the time I realized he was in me, he was finished. At least he’s someone else’s problem now. I’m sure he’s leaving a bevy of sexually frustrated whores all along the Tri-State area.
The asshole.

Oh God, I just realized something. Ben’s going to clearly see my orgasm face. Crap, this is bad. I’ve caught a glimpse of my ‘O’ face when BOB and I had a stolen moment near a mirror. It’s not a good look for me. Sex in the dark hides a lot of the embarrassing crap, like wearing a blindfold… Or at least having really blurry vision.

Hopefully, the curtains will be drawn.

It’s been my theory that afternoon sex is not nearly as dirty as nighttime sex. Something about sex at night with only the soft glow from the moonlight or a dimly lit lamp makes you feel less inhibited… raunchier, sluttier.