The Convenience of Lies (16 page)

“Ok Mackenzie, I trust you.”

“Mackenzie, you're so nice, someone like you should have a boyfriend,” Tyler flirts. We have been building a friendship over the last couple of days since Kurt confessed to me. Since Kira enjoys hanging out with Tyler at Gameland, I figure this can't be a bad thing.

“Aww, that's so sweet of you Tyler,” I say, pretending I have no clue what he is up to.

“Seriously, why don't you have a boyfriend?” Tyler asks.

“Because none of the guys I like ever like me back,” I tell him honestly.

“Well, I don't see who that could possibly be because you're so nice. Any guy would like you.”

Tyler's flirting is getting slightly too strong for me. I am still completely interested in Ramon, even though I pretend, even to myself, that I am not. And, well I am plainly just not interested in Tyler like that. So, I change the subject.

“My mom left this morning to go on a trip for the next couple of days to visit my relatives. I think I'm going to have a party,” I tell Tyler. “But the problem is that I don't want to have any alcohol there, and I don't know how to make it interesting without it.” I've always wanted to go to a party, but I've never been invited to one. So why not host one?

“Why don't you want any alcohol?” Tyler asks.

“I just don't like it. My relatives drink it too much, and drunken people are no fun to be around. Also, I don't want someone to rape me or something. I don't know if I would be able to control myself, and I would probably go around kissing everybody,” I tell him, feeling my insides crawl at just the thought of drinking.

“Aww Mackenzie, but it is soo fun! You have to drink. Just try it. You won't know if you like it or not until you try it sometime.”

“No, I don't want to.” I am trying to remain steadfast in my decision.

“Come on Mackenzie, your party will be no fun without it. You would like Smirnoff Ice; it tastes sort of like lemonade. I will bring it, so you won't even have to pay for it. Come on Mackenzie, it will be so fun. And I promise nothing will happen to you,” he says convincingly.

“Well, I am kind of curious to find out what type of drunk I am. But not that curious.” I crack a little bit and admit that I do have one weakness: curiosity.

“Mackenzie, come on. I know you will like it. You even want to, you just said so. Come on, Mackenzie,” he prods me.

“Why do you want me to drink so bad?” I ask. I seriously don't see how what I do is going to affect him in any way.

“I just think it would be fun. You will like it. I want you to have fun. Mackenzie, come on, I know you want to.” Tyler is unrelenting!

“I will drink only if Kira does,” I tell Tyler. I figure that this is a safe bet because Kira has a liver problem, so I know that she won't drink. And by giving in just a little bit, I manage to satiate Tyler for the time being.

“When are you going to have your party?” Tyler asks.

“Tonight; will you be there?” I reply, hoping he will be available. The more people who are at my party, the better it will be. And I can't have the party tomorrow because it's Cody's birthday, and I don't want to encroach on his celebrations.

“Yeah, I'll be there. I'll ask my friend if she will buy the alcohol for us.”

If I'm going to have a party, I'm certainly going to make sure that my best friend is there. When I tell her about my idea, Kira is more than happy to help me set up for the party. In no time, I've brought her over to my house, and we start evaluating what needs to be done.

“We are going to need lots of space for dancing,” Kira says, listing off what she thinks needs to happen. We look around my living room, the largest room in the house. In one corner we have a piano, left over from the days when my sister was taking lessons. My mom has a bunch of decorative pillows along the floor next to the piano. Sliding glass doors that lead to the back patio adorn the wall next to the piano. The wall opposite the piano is covered with bookcases sporting a rather large library that my mom proudly displays. Our large screen TV sits along that wall too, next to the bookcases. Our “couch,” which is actually an old grey love seat that was probably in fashion during the 80s, sits along the wall opposite the glass doors. We don't have any coffee table cluttering up the middle of the living room, and so as I look around, I think there's plenty of room to dance.

However, as we survey the living room, I see Kira's eyes land on the love seat. “Is it alright if we move this?” She says, pointing at it.

“Oh, you think we need to move it?” I ask, taken off-guard.

“Yeah! We need space for dancing… Is that okay?” I can tell she's worried she has over asserted herself.

“No, no, that's fine. But, where do you want to move it to?” While I don't think moving the couch is necessary, I don't really care all that much either, and Kira seems to have an opinion on the matter.

“We can put it outside,” she says, indicating the patio that's on the other side of the sliding glass doors. “Then people can hang out on it outside to cool off.”

This idea never would have crossed my mind. “Okay, sure.” The love seat is not heavy, and so it's not a problem for the two of us to put it outside. Now I can see Kira eyeing my mom's decorative pillows.

Watching her gaze, I ask, “Do you think we should move those too?”

“Yes, I think so….”

“Sure, not a problem, we can just throw them in one of the bedrooms.” I pick up a few of the pillows and carry them off to the nearest bedroom, and Kira follows suit.

The wall behind where the loveseat is normally placed is actually a half wall with a view from the living room into the kitchen. The half wall has a shelf along it where the top of the wall ends. My mom has all sorts of little trinkets out for display on this shelf, mainly just candles in fancy candle holders, most of which are made out of glass. Without the couch there, I realize that these trinkets look very vulnerable.

“Let's move these candles too,” I tell Kira.

“You think we need to?” she asks me.

“Yeah, I just don't want anybody bumping into them and breaking them. I'm not sure how I would explain
that
to my mom.” Kira sees my point and helps me move the trinkets into the same bedroom we moved the pillows to. We figure the door to this room can remain closed during the party.

The whole time I'm working with Kira to prepare for the party, my conscience is nagging me. I NEED to tell her about Kurt's confession; I need to show her the rock, and I need to convince her to believe what Ramon told me. How am I going to do that without Kira poking all sorts of holes into his story? Right now we are so focused on getting ready for the party; I do not think it's the best time for me to explain. Tomorrow I will sit her down and tell her. Sometime between now and tomorrow, I'll figure out what to say to her. And if I haven't, I'll do the best I can and pray that it goes well. I've waited way too long to tell her, and I can't wait any longer.

As the sun starts to set, Tyler arrives at my house. “We have to go pick up the drinks. My friend will get it for us; I hope you don't mind driving with bottles in your car,” Tyler explains to me.

“I don't mind,” I tell him. “The cops can only pull me over if I do something wrong, so I will just be careful,” I assure Tyler. I don't even know why I am agreeing to this; not getting the alcohol would be such an easy way to have a clean party, but in a way Tyler is right, I
want
to try drinking. I have heard so much about it and heard so many people say how fun and amazing it is, I want to try it for myself. Tyler and I leave Kira at my house while we go to pick up the alcohol so that she can be there in case anybody else shows up.

Since we are both under 21, Tyler has recruited his friend, Melissa, to buy the drinks for us. She is slender, toned, and tall with long dark brown hair that she has pulled back into a thick ponytail. She looks like she just came out of the gym because she's sporting a sports bra underneath a spaghetti-strap shirt and exercise pants.

We end up getting the liquor from Vons.
How cheap can you get?
Melissa mainly gets Smirnoff Ice for the girls, as well as some beer and other booze I have never heard of before.

To my surprise, Melissa announces, “Damn! That's the cleanest trunk I've ever seen!” when I pop it open for her.
Why would anyone have a messy trunk? Isn't it easy to keep them clean?
Soon I realize the problem is that Melissa can't secure down the alcohol because there's literally nothing else back there. She grumbles and gripes about this for a bit, moving the bottles around various ways to try to keep them from rolling, and then finally decides she has done all she can, and with a sigh, she quits. “Just don't take any turns fast,” she tells me with dissatisfaction dripping from her voice. I don't care how much that liquor rolls around in my trunk; I definitely don't want it in the main part of the car just in case I am pulled over. So, we drive all of the way back to my house with the bottles rolling around in the back.

“I'll just be slow on the turns,” I say to reassure Tyler, who is cringing every time we hear the bottles clank together. I'm not sure what he's so scared of. Those bottles are made out of thick, strong, glass, and I'm not going
that
fast.

The first thing Tyler does when we get back to my place is put on some music. It looks like he's brought his CD library. It's cool, smooth, dance music. He turns it up loud enough that we can easily hear it throughout my house, but not so much so as to worry me about the neighbors.

Meanwhile, the first thing Kira does when we bring in all of the alcohol is dive in for a Smirnoff. She knows that I think drinking is nasty, so she keeps trying to hide it behind her back… like I won't see it. Doesn't she have a liver issue?
Well, she knows more about her situation than I do, so I'm sure she can make better choices for herself than I can
.

Cody and Shane arrived while we were picking up the booze. This is the first time I've really combined my two groups of friends together. It will be interesting to see how well they all mesh together.

My heart sinks a little bit as I realize my party isn't going to have a big turnout. There's just me, Tyler, Kira, Cody, and Shane. But, what else did I expect? It's not like I went around promoting this party to everybody I know; I didn't send out any kind of mass texts or anything. Ramon was not invited because I have not yet gotten to talk to Kira. So, if she saw him here now, she would freak out, and I don't really want to face her wrath. Not until I've talked to her. I try to tell myself that this is a cool party anyway, despite the low turnout.

Pretty soon Kira and Tyler are running around in my living room, red in the face and giggling. I hang back, sitting at my kitchen table because I don't want to drink. Cody and Shane are sitting by me, watching Kira and Tyler. While we are in a different room from Tyler and Kira, we can still see what they're up to over the half-wall. Every so often, Cody gives me this look over his glasses, and I am surprised to see a bit of distain. I can't see what I could have done to warrant this, and so I ignore him.

Tyler interrupts our standstill and shouts to me, “MACKENZIE!!! You said you would drink if Kira did! You can't go back on your word! You are missing out on all of the fun!”

Tyler does have a point. Clearly Cody and Shane are being party poopers, and I am starting to feel left out of the action. With this thought in mind, I open my first Smirnoff and take a sip. It's almost like I can feel its fumes rising up into my sinuses, burning my tongue and the back of my throat all the way down. As the liquid travels down my throat to my stomach, it's as if those fumes have been lit on fire, and its flames are devouring my insides. My throat closes as smoke from the flames clogs it up, and I start to gag and cough. While the initial taste of the drink was a bit sweet, it has left behind an overwhelming bitter aftertaste that makes my tongue feel like it is the persisting embers of a dying fire that are clinging on for life. Quite a while afterwards, that taste is still there, and I'm finding I'm despising it the more I get acquainted with it.
I need to consume something else to get rid of this flavor.
I grab a bag of chips that Cody brought and start munching on them. I figure this is a great solution to my problem because Ramon has told me that eating a lot while drinking will help prevent a hangover. Now, with every sip, I have a chip ready, which I throw into my mouth as soon as I swallow, to chew and mask that horrible flavor.

Shane and Cody are just watching me sip on my drink like hawks eyeing their prey. To escape the pressure of their eyes, I get up abruptly and join Tyler and Kira as they dance in the living room. We have the patio door wide open, and I can feel the breeze of the pleasantly warm summer night's air wafting into the room. This is my favorite time of year.

“Hey! She's drinking!!” Tyler slurs as I approach them, giving me a sideways hug. I'm back in the heat of the party! Kira and I start dancing together around Tyler, enjoying getting into each other's personal space, holding onto our drinks and taking sips every so often. Kira and I are mimicking each other as we circle around Tyler. She is wearing a cute summer dress, while I'm in spaghetti straps and short shorts. Looking down at myself, I enjoy watching my legs dance. They have a sleek tone that can only be found in a ballerina. I look back up at Kira and watch her face. She has an alluring expression, and I know she's trying to look cool. THIS is more like what I had in mind for the night.

I glance over at Cody, and he is clearly having no fun, watching me and Kira dance with Tyler. His eyes are piercing me, giving me that same judgmental look. This time, I know what I am doing to warrant that stare. I know that he would prefer that I dance around him. But, this is part of my purpose. I know Cody has a major crush on me, and I want him to stop liking me as more than a friend. Even though I have told him this, Cody still goes around acting like he is practically dating me. My solution to this problem is to make Cody see me in a bad light, to
make
him grossed out by me.

I notice that I can't really taste the alcohol in my Smirnoff Ice anymore, and take a look at my bottle to see how much is left. I'm only half way through. When I look up, I see that the edges of everything around me look yellowish and fuzzy. I gaze at the top of my half-wall in awe. Slowly I realize that I am seeing double, and no matter how long I stare, it remains double. Why does it look like that? I turn around and take a step towards my kitchen and realize that I don't have very good control of my legs; it's like they have turned into wobbly spaghetti. I'm not used to this sensation, and as an advanced ballerina, I'm not enjoying the lack of control of my body. I feel like a toddler. I start walking more gingerly, suddenly becoming aware of how everything looks out of perspective; it's hard for me to judge how far away things are, including the floor. Despite my caution, my side bumps into a wall. I continue more carefully, and again! I bump into a wall. Despite my best efforts, I can't walk straight. Accepting the reality of my situation, I decide that it's not worth worrying about. No one really cares anyway, right?