The Dead of Winter (Seasons of Jefferson: Book 2) (3 page)

My parents keep repeating how lucky we are to be alive.
We?
How can I believe there’s a “we” when they’re keeping me in the dark like this?
Maybe I’d be a little more convinced if they’d stop protecting me from whatever news they don’t want me to hear about. How do I know
we’re
alive when I haven’t even seen her?

One more thing. Don’t they understand that keeping Peyton’s condition a secret isn’t helping with all these damn nightmares? I’m afraid to close my eyes because I can’t block out the continuously haunting visions. I keep seeing Mason, Kaitlyn, and Brody struggling to pull her from the truck before it’s knocked loose and plummets down the raging river. She disappeared right in front of me.
How in the hell did they save her?
Damn it! I need answers!

The door creaks open and I look up to see the friendly smile of Nurse Sarah standing in the doorway. She’s holding a tray with a small paper cup, a bottle of water, and a tablet of paper. “Hey there,” her soft voice floats through the room. “How’s my number one patient feeling this morning?”

I push my gruff, unused voice from my body, “I’d be feeling a lot better if I knew the paper on that tray you’re carrying had some answers on it.”

“Well, I’m not sure what kind of answers you’re looking for, but I do have a pretty potent pain reliever for you. I’m sure it’s about time for this.” She studies my angry face. “It should take the edge off a bit.”

“Sorry, Sarah. I don’t mean to be an ass, especially not to you. You’ve been so great with me. I’m just frustrated. I need to know if my girlfriend, Peyton, is okay. She was brought in with me, and nobody will tell me anything about her condition. I’m going crazy here.”

A hesitant grin forms across her face as she walks toward me, bends in close, and begins to whisper, “The cute little blonde girl down in room 83A?” She lifts her eyebrows and crinkles her nose. “I really shouldn’t say anything, but since you’re my favorite patient, I will tell you that she woke up last night.” She brings her finger up to her lips. “Shhh. That’s our little secret okay? Now take this medicine and let’s get rid of some of that pain.”

My eyes grow wide, as I swallow the lump in my throat.
She’s still here. She woke up. That means she’s not dead. Not only that, but I know where to find her. I commit my new favorite number to memory. 83A. I don’t know how I’m going to do it, but the first place I’m going when I get out of this bed is straight to her room. I’ve got to figure out how to get to her.

Slowly sitting up, I thank Sarah for her willingness to let me in on the little secret. The pain of the movement has my head spinning, and I’m reminded that I’m still not strong enough to get out of bed and run down the hall like my heart is telling me to do. Instead, I take the much needed medicine from the paper cup on the tray and swallow it down with the refreshing water. I hadn’t realized how thirsty I was until I found relief in that bottle. Being upright, even for a moment, has left me weak and nauseous. Sarah evidently sees the color leaving my face, and helps me lie back in the bed.

“Whoa there, kid. I can see you’re not feeling so hot. Try to stay still while the medicine goes to work.”

I do as I’m told and wait once more to feel the dizzy sensation I’ve come to expect from this pill.

“I’ll see you in a bit,” are the last words I hear from Nurse Sarah, before I drift back to sleep in room 78B, just five doors down from the love of my life.

I’m driving down the road in my pickup truck. Icy, cold winds gush through the open windows. I don’t understand why the windows are down. When I push the button to roll them up, nothing happens. They’re gone. Looking down, I notice shards of glass blanketing the floorboard beneath my feet. The windows have been broken out. Thank God Peyton is wearing my heavy thermal jacket, because it is bitterly cold. Not just the kind that can be fixed with a cup of hot chocolate, but the kind that bites the skin and makes one’s eyes water. Peyton is snuggled in close to my side, shivering as we drive as fast as we can through the winding canyon. Four wheel drive is limiting my speed. I can’t remember why I feel such an urgency to return to the cabin so quickly, but something is telling me to push this truck to its limit. The snow is coming down in strong gusts, and my windshield wipers are on full blast, trying to clear the muddy, snowy streaks from obscuring my vision. Off in the distance, the color red, zig-zags down the mountainside. It’s weaving in and out between a cluster of tall cedars. It looks like it could be a truck making its way down to the road. Checking my rearview mirror to see my dad’s truck carrying Brody, Kaitlyn, and the rest of the gang, I have to chuckle at the massive pile of Christmas trees in the back. They’re blanketing the cab and hanging down over the front, slightly covering the windshield. I gently pump my brakes, trying to get Brody’s attention. He should be aware that there could be another vehicle headed our way. It’s a pretty narrow road, and the driving conditions are even more treacherous with the slick snow and ice. I continue to look back in the rearview mirror, trying to get their attention.

That’s when I hear her scream. Adrenaline bursts through my body when Peyton shrieks, “Caden, watch out!” I pull my eyes back to the road to see that not only has the red truck made its way off the mountain, but it’s coming straight for us. The driver behind the wheel seems to be waving his arm wildly. He’s coming at us in a quick blur. Slamming on my brakes to avoid the impending collision, I lose control and begin to fishtail toward the embankment. As hard as I swing the steering wheel back and forth, I can’t straighten it out. Simultaneously, several loud bangs ring through the canyon. They sound like gunshots! I can’t tell where they’re coming from. Is the driver waving his hand, or is that a gun? It all happens so fast. I hear the clanking of metal and feel the force of the impact. There’s a loud pop, and the rolling begins. I pull Peyton in close with one arm, and hold onto the steering wheel with the other, ducking, spinning, rolling, crunching. Cold. Water. Heaviness.

“Caden, wake up. I think you’re having that nightmare again.”

I feel the gentle pressure of a wet washcloth streak across my forehead. As with every time I’ve had this dream for the last three days, I work with much effort to pry my eyes open. When my body finally allows me to peek through my heavy lids, I see Jenna standing over me.

“Hey Caden, sorry to wake you, but I couldn’t handle watching you for one more minute. It’s pretty bad, isn’t it?”

Looking at Jenna, I take a deep breath, slowly releasing it as I swallow the freshly formed lump in my throat.

“The pain? I’m okay. I just took a pill.”

“No, the nightmare. It’s hard to watch my best friend go to battle every time he sleeps.” Jenna’s response is quiet and somber. She gently sits down on the edge of my bed. I cringe in pain, as it dips beneath me.

Jenna winces, “Sorry ‘bout that.” She scoots a little further from me, helping to relieve the dip that’s pulling my weight onto my arm. “I understand your fear of going to sleep. Every night since the accident, I’ve fought to stay awake because I know I’m about to relive the worst day of my life.” Jenna rubs her eyes, showing me that fatigue has set in. A pained expression spreads across her face, and I’m reminded that she’s trying to erase the same shattering images that are plaguing all of us. I can’t imagine what it was like for her to look over the precipice to find my truck in the middle of that raging river. I’ll never forget how she stayed by my side when she found me lying there on that bloody bed of snow. I can only imagine what she sees every night when she closes her eyes.

Reaching out for her hand, I give it a thankful squeeze, “Are you going to be okay?”

“Don’t worry about me, Caden. How can I help you? Anything. Just name it.”

I look up at her sincere face, and her close-mouthed grin looking back at me. It’s comforting to have Jenna here. In all of the confusion and pain of the last three days, I had forgotten my trusted friend is always someone I can count on to help me. She’d have my back, even if it meant sacrificing her own. She’s pretty much filled in for my twin sister since I’ve been recovering from my injury.

My poor sister. Mom and Dad say she’s having a tough time leaving the house. She’s still working through her understandable fear of being out in the open, unguarded. It makes me feel better to know she’s safe at home. Besides, Jenna is the person I need right now. She’s strong. Brave. I don’t need to protect her. The girl has guts. She’ll take on any challenge. Thinking about her character gives me an idea. She’s the one who can get me to Peyton.

With no time to waste, I blurt it out. “Take me to her. Take me to Peyton.”

Instantly, the smile leaves her face. Staring at me like I’ve lost my mind, she shakes her head. Her tone drops to a serious murmur, “Anything but that.”

Upset with her immediate, inconsiderate response, bitterness courses through my veins.
She didn’t even think about it.
I allow myself a moment of silence so I can think this through.
How can I get her to help me? I have to get her on my side. I’m desperate.
I glare at her intensely, knowing there’s no other choice but to lay it on thick.

“What happened to always having my back, Jenna? You can see this is torturing me. You’re one of my best friends. We take care of each other. I’m there for you; you’re there for me. Remember? I thought you’d always be my wingman.” I squeeze her hand one more time before letting go.
Come on. How can I get her to do this for me? Think.
That’s when the memories begin to roll.

“Remember the time you snuck out to meet Dante’s band after the fair, and I covered for you? Or there was that time in biology when you were going to take an “F” instead of dissecting the frog. I made all the cuts for you when Mr. Pine wasn’t looking. Oh, and let’s not forget the time you were speeding down the road without a license. I switched seats with you before the officer got to the window. Did you forget? It’s my turn to get some help here, Jenna. How about it?” I know I’m not playing fair, and my tone is conniving, but I have to get through to her.

A contemplative look flashes over Jenna’s face as she leans in to whisper, “Caden, you know I am only looking out for you. I know I owe you. I do, but please don’t ask me to do
this
. Not right now. Not yet. You’re not ready.”

I’m furious that she’s making this decision for me. Doesn’t she see how critical it is that I get to Peyton? I’m going to have an aneurysm if they don’t let me see her. I feel an intense surge of fury come over me as I muscle myself up in the bed. Shakily, I take a deep breath, gathering my composure before I speak.

“Jenna, I get it. I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I do. But I’ve realized something today. Being kept in the dark is the one thing that’s tearing me apart. I
can live
with the fact that my truck is submerged somewhere in the Salmon River. I
can live
with the fact that I’ll be in pain for weeks. I can
even live
with the fact that I can’t play basketball this season. But do you know what I
can’t
live with? Not. Seeing. Peyton! I
can’t
live one more day without seeing her! Jenna, you’re my only hope.” I pause dramatically, hoping my desperate stare will pierce through her thick skull and find its way to her soft spot. “Why won’t you help me?!?”

Silence momentarily settles upon the room. The slight pinch and pull of her lips, tells me that Jenna is about to fold. Her eyes are squinting now as she slowly leans toward me. I watch every minuscule twitch of her face as she struggles with her decision. Finally, she speaks.

“This is going to be tricky, but I’ll figure it out. I won’t let you down. I know where she is. When do you want to go?”

Relief overtakes me as I slowly release my breath. “I knew you wouldn’t let me down.” I light up inside with joy at the renewed hope of seeing my girlfriend. “It sure took you long enough to remember which pack you’re running with.” I raise my eyebrows, smiling at the return of my partner in crime. “Now, let’s figure out a plan.”

A quizzical look overtakes Jenna’s face. After what seems to be five minutes of deliberation, her eyes narrow in on mine. “What time do you think your parents will be here today?”

“The last few days they’ve been coming about midmorning. The doctor makes his rounds close to lunchtime, and they like to have plenty of time to come up with questions before we see him. Last night, my dad said he was going to try to get me released. We don’t think there’s anything more they can do for me here that can’t be done at home. I’m going crazy, Jenna. I need to get out of this place.”

“Ok, I’ve got an idea.”

“An idea to get me out of here?”

“No, we’ll let your dad handle that. I have an idea to get you in to see Peyton before you’re released.”

I feel the frustration beginning to rise in my chest. I don’t see why this should be so hard. She’s like five doors down. “Just grab a wheelchair and take me down there. Nobody is stopping us,” I snap.

My stern tone causes Jenna to draw away from me. She drops her eyes to the floor and releases an audible sigh. “Not on this end, at least.”

What is the deal? Why the games? Why do we have to sneak in to see her? We were all in this together. It’s been three days. They must know I’m dying to check on her.
“What do you mean, not on this end?”

“Okay, listen. I can see you’re frustrated, but you need to know something. Kaitlyn, Brody, and I have all tried to visit Peyton. Her parents won’t allow it. We’ve followed them to the room, but they’ve stopped us every time. They won’t let us in. They won’t let us see her. None of us. We wanted to protect you. We didn’t want to get you down there, only to be turned away. We knew it would crush you, but I can see it’s just doing more harm than good. So I’ve got an idea, but it’s not going to work unless we’re here alone. We’ve got to make sure your family is not around. But we’ve also got to get Peyton’s guard dog mother away from her room for a few minutes.”

Desperate, I whimper, “A few minutes is all I need. I just need to see her to make sure she’s okay.” I can feel the tightness pulling at the tendons in my neck. Images of Peyton screaming in the middle of the raging river invade my mind. It’s the last thing I saw before everything went black.
I need to see her. I need to hear her voice. I need to touch her.
“What’s your plan?”