The Defendant (14 page)

To her surprise, the church was only half full and she didn’t have to search long to find an empty seat. She chose one close to the front, but far enough away that she wouldn’t be mistaken for family. She wanted to be there for Daniel and to show him her support, but she was also conscious of not wanting to intrude. Daniel sat with his father and brother and from the familiar features of one of the women in the front row, a maternal aunt.

Josie’s gaze alighted on the coffin where it stood in the center of the aisle. It was a dark cherry wood casket, its top laden with a bouquet of sweet-smelling lilies. White in color, they contrasted starkly with the darkness of the coffin, but somehow they seemed appropriate and their heavy perfume filled the air.

She breathed in deeply and began to ease the air out between her lips. When she turned her head slightly, she caught sight of Chase and what was left of her breath came out in a rush.

He looked as handsome as ever, tall and broad shouldered in his dark, tailored suit. His curly brown hair was damp from the shower, or maybe it was from the rain? Either way, it only added to his good looks. He was a man who demanded attention, whether he sought it out or not.

She thought of the woman draped all over him in the bar and her jaw tensed. Chase had appeared more than happy with the situation and the woman sure as hell hadn’t forced him to hold her that close.

Despite Josie’s best efforts, shards of jealousy once again pierced her heart and tears burned behind her eyes. She wished she could put this all behind her. She wished she didn’t care. But the truth was, she still loved him and would always love him. She’d cursed herself because the truth was, it was Chase Barrington, or no one else. She’d proved it over and over again. The crystallization of this reality was like being damned to hell.

Not that she’d been promiscuous, but she’d done her best in college to forget him. It had only been after several short and futile relationships that she’d finally faced the truth: She’d never feel for other men what she felt for her high school love. Despite the way he’d left her and the agony of pain he’d caused, her heart still yearned for him and there was not a single thing she could do about it.

She watched while Chase took a seat not far from her on the other side of the church. Her sigh of relief was tempered with disappointment. She hadn’t expected him to sit beside her, but it would have been nice if he’d at least acknowledged her presence.

She caught a glimpse of another dark suit from the corner of her eye. The next moment, Riley squeezed in beside her, folding his long limbs into the tight confines of the pew.

“How are you, sis?” he whispered, his dark eyes full of concern.

A surge of emotion tightened her throat and she blinked back a rush of tears. Trust Riley to break through her defenses, he’d always had the knack for doing that. Despite being five years older, they shared a very close bond. He was dark as the night and she was as fair as the day, but somehow their characters meshed and they saw into each other’s souls.

If there was anyone she could have confided in all those sad years ago, it was Riley. Her love for Chase was so big that she wondered how she’d contained it and kept it from her family. She’d wanted to sing it from the rooftops, to tell everyone who might want to hear, but she’d kept the knowledge a secret and now she was glad she had.

When it all went wrong, there were many times she wished she’d had a sturdy shoulder to cry on, but by then, Riley had left home and she’d felt too ashamed to call him because she’d kept the truth hidden for so long.

Knowing that she’d misjudged the one man who she’d loved beyond all others made it even harder to seek comfort in her older brother’s arms. In a way, she was glad no one else knew. She’d crawled into a deep hole, undisturbed, and mourned the loss of her love in private—and there had been so much mourning to do.

She’d mourned the loss of her future; she’d mourned the loss of her past. She’d mourned the loss of her innocence… She’d never trust her heart to another again. She worked hard over the years not to grow bitter and she was sure she’d succeeded on that front. She wasn’t bitter. Angry, hurt, confused…yes. But she still believed in love. She only had to look at her parents and her married siblings for confirmation of that.

Her parents were still going strong after forty years. All five of her brothers were married. She didn’t have to spend much time with any of them to feel the depth of love between them and their chosen mates. While the knowledge they were happy filled her with joy, she couldn’t deny during the dark and lonely depths of the night, she yearned to feel the same.

Aware that Riley stared at her with a look of growing concern, she stammered out a few whispered words of reassurance and hoped he put her reticence down to the solemnity of the occasion. As if sensing her fragility, he put an arm around her shoulders and drew her in close against his side. She breathed in his warm, familiar smell and leaned into him, grateful to have him near.

Gradually, the church filled and the service started with a hymn. The beautiful words of
Amazing Grace
brought a burst of fresh tears to her eyes. Riley shot her another look of concern tinged with understanding and pressed a soft kiss against her hair. She squeezed his hand and did her best to concentrate on the minister when he began to speak.

The woman Josie guessed to be the older sister of Kelly Logan was halfway through the eulogy when Trevor gave out a cry of pain. Reaching out to the coffin, he threw his arm over it, his hand tangling up in the flowers. He hugged the coffin close and tears streamed down his cheeks. Josie bit her lip, devastated by what she witnessed.

Her gaze shot to Daniel and her heart broke right in two. The desolation on the young boy’s face was enough to unravel her. She stirred, ready to go to him, only realizing at the last minute what she was doing.

Riley’s arm restrained her gently and she slowly relaxed back against him. It wasn’t her place to offer Daniel comfort. He had a family who could give him that. She was nothing more than the psychologist who had assessed him at the request of the prosecution and it wouldn’t be long before everyone would know the contents of her report. She was the woman who was about to ruin what was left of the tattered shreds of his life. He didn’t even know it yet.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Chase typed in the necessary information and finished his report. A fight had broken out earlier that morning between two men over the sale of fifteen pigs and it had taken him most of the day to get to the bottom of it. He loved his job in rural policing, but every now and then he found himself wondering what it would be like to be a detective in the city. Sydney or Melbourne, it didn’t really matter which one. Maybe, even Brisbane. He frowned at the thought.
No, not Brisbane.
He couldn’t imagine living there without thinking of Josie.

He hadn’t seen her since the funeral, more than a fortnight ago, and even then, it had only been from a distance. She’d appeared clearly shaken in the church, fraught with sadness and sorrow. Overcome with emotion, she’d sought comfort in Riley’s arms. Chase had quietly bemoaned the injustice of it—it should have been him offering her solace that day,
his
strong arms keeping her safe, just like he promised her.

But there was no turning back and no rewriting their history. He could only assume she was still angry over the stunt he’d pulled at The Bullet. The very thought of that evening weighed heavy in his heart but, short of telling her the whole sordid truth, there was nothing he could do to explain his actions.

And now, there was her report.

John Wall, a mountain of a man and a veteran prosecutor, who was in charge of the Logan hearing had recently delivered it to him. The matter was scheduled to be heard in a few days and when John had given Chase a copy of Josie’s findings, the contents stayed with him long after he’d read them. Although he’d guessed much of what her report would say, he knew better than anyone else how difficult it must have been for her to arrive at her conclusion.

He wished he was brave enough to phone her; to dial her number and ask her how she was, but more than anything, he wished he had the courage to ask her why she wasn’t married with a handful of children, like she’d always wanted.

“How’s the Logan matter going? Do you have a copy of the psych report from the defense, yet?”

Riley’s question cut abruptly into Chase’s thoughts and he focused on his boss who stood a few feet away.

“Not yet. They have until the end of the day to serve it on us. I’m guessing it will say the exact opposite of what’s contained in Josie’s.”

“No surprises there. What date is the competency hearing?”

“It’s slated for first thing Tuesday morning. We have four days to prepare and that’s counting the weekend.”

A smile tugged at the corners of Riley’s mouth. “Sounds like John’s going to be busy.”

“Lucky for us he’s the best in the business. I’m sure he’ll be ready and raring to go.”

Riley nodded and turned away. He was halfway across the squad room when he stopped and turned back to face Chase.

“Oh, I nearly forgot. Kate asked me to invite you to a barbeque this Saturday night. She said it’s been ages since we had you over. In fact, I think the last time we got together was the night of the tragedy at the Logan place.”

Chase grimaced. “Yeah, we sure can do without a repeat of that.”

“You can say that again. I’ve invited Josie, too. She’s been in town more than three months and I’ve barely seen her outside of work.”

Chase dropped his gaze and did his best to keep his expression from showing the sudden discomfort he felt. Despite his efforts, Riley moved closer and frowned.

“Are you okay with it, Chase? I mean, I know you took her to her high school graduation, but that was it, wasn’t it? You don’t have a thing for her, do you?”

“A thing? Of course not.” Chase hoped the heat he could feel rising from his chest and creeping up his neck went undetected. Riley turned away again and Chase swallowed a sigh of relief. It was short lived. A moment later, Riley spun on his heel again and faced Chase.

“What about Josie? She hasn’t been carrying some kind of flame for you, has she?”

“No, no I wouldn’t think so. We… We barely knew each other back then.” Chase almost choked on the lie.

“Good. I wouldn’t want to make things awkward, for either of you.”

“Nope. No awkwardness here. You’re more than welcome to invite her over. She’s your sister, after all.”

“Yes, she is and it’s been great to have her back. Mom and Dad are beyond thrilled. For too long, I’ve been their only child to live within a hundred mile or so radius.”

Chase thought wistfully of the parents he’d lost five years ago. They’d been killed instantly in an automobile accident. He was grateful they hadn’t suffered, but being an only child now meant he found himself alone, disconnected, and with no family to speak of. Every now and then he wondered what it might be like to have a sibling or two—or six, like Riley.

“It must be nice to know they care,” he murmured.

“Yeah, it is. As much as they drive me nuts sometimes, I wouldn’t trade them for all the money in the world.”

* * *

Daniel stared at the cobwebs on the ceiling high above his bed and wondered about what it would be like to be a spider. Not a big hairy one that everyone wanted to swipe with the broom or drown with insect spray, but a harmless, useful one like a huntsman—one that could live its life spinning its intricate web in the dark corner of a room, far from everything and everybody, coming and going as it pleased without being noticed. It sounded so far removed from the reality of his life since the murder he could scarcely imagine it or remember what life had been like before the arrival of Neil Whitcomb.

Neil Whitcomb
. Daniel had finally discovered the man’s name. His lawyer had given him a copy of the police report when they’d met earlier in the day. His competency hearing was a handful of days away. His lawyer wanted him to be prepared.

Reading through the police account, Daniel felt detached, removed from the events that unfolded on the pages—like he was reading about someone else.

Neil Whitcomb.
It sounded like such a normal, ordinary name. It sounded like the name of a man who had never done any wrong; the kind of name belonging to a man Daniel could be introduced to at the farm store and think nothing of it; the kind of name that could have belonged to his neighbor.

There was nothing to indicate that a man with the name of Neil Whitcomb would break into Daniel’s home and rape his mother and drive Daniel to murder. There was no disguising or denying what it was and no way to minimize the event. In the blink of an eye, it had happened—just like he’d told Josie and according to his barrister, she’d said as much in her report.

Everything she’d written was true, and he couldn’t blame her for her honesty. He’d always known his actions were wrong and that he’d probably go to jail, but he didn’t care. He still didn’t care. He was scared to death of the thought of being locked up, but if he came across the same situation again, he’d act exactly the same way.

If there was one thing he
was
sorry for, it was the way it had affected his family. His beloved mother, the woman he’d tried to spare from pain, was dead. His father might as well be, too. When he was there, he moved around the house like a ghost, his face devoid of emotion, blank and expressionless. He’d returned to work out of necessity and even though he no longer did the long hauls from Melbourne to Brisbane, more and more often, he’d come home late, well past the hour of bedtime.