The Disneyland Book of Secrets 2014: One Local's Unauthorized, Rapturous and Indispensable Guide to the Happiest Places on Earth (106 page)

BOOK: The Disneyland Book of Secrets 2014: One Local's Unauthorized, Rapturous and Indispensable Guide to the Happiest Places on Earth
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The spinning rocket ships and the celestial bodies they navigate
among are all moving, reflecting sunlight or neon–it’svisually pretty.

After waiting in a mostly
exposed queue, at the mercy of the sun or chill, Guests board one of the twelve ships, often a slow process.  Each rocket has a shallow central bench that Guests straddle–comfortable for small kids but torture for grown-ups, especially the tall or heavy-set.  Each rocket fits two Guests, three at the most if there are a couple of very little children.

Buckle up and make sure your little one is properly restrained.  If you have any problems with the safety restraints, alert a Cast Member before launch.  You and your kids are going to be whirling more than two stories above the ground.

Once all Guests are seated and belted in, the rockets begin to spin in a clockwise direction, and the celestial orbs above begin their rotating dance.  A manual controller lets you determine how high you want your rocket ship to rise.  One of the first things adult Guests will notice is that the rockets tilt on their sides, left side up, right side dipping, at a fairly steep angle, another a rather uncomfortable factor.

What
’s lacking in this attraction is a coherent or compelling story.  Story has always been the cornerstone of the
magic
of
Disneyland
attractions and it seems absent here. 
Astro Orbitor
is a pretty version of the jet ride that you’ll find at most amusement parks and carnivals.  On the plus side, for the couple of minutes you’re whirling around the kinetic cosmic sculpture, if you can block out the discomfort of your seat you’ll enjoy the whoosh of the wind in your hair and the excellent birds-eye views of the
Central Plaza
, the
Sleeping Beauty Castle
, and
Tomorrowland
.

This attraction is best suited for tots not yet ready for
Autopia
,
Space Mountain
, or
Star Tours
, all of which have height requirements.  Despite its soaring rockets,
Astro Orbitor
has no height restrictions.  Toddlers and small children will find this ride a blast, a fun precursor to the big-kid attractions. 
Did You Know?
  In a strange coincidence, one of da Vinci’s sketches, a design for a tank that seems to be protected by a saucer-like tent or canopy, uncannily resembles the exterior of
Tomorrowland
’s beautiful
Space Mountain
.  Da Vinci’s tank drawing is part of the “Codex Arundel” at London’s famous British Library.
Did You Also Know?
  For fans of minutia: The same attraction is spelled differently in
Anaheim
and
Orlando
.  It’s
Astro Orbitor
in
Disneyland
, and
Astro Orbiter
in
Walt Disney World
.
FastPass:
  No.  Even with its slow loading and lack of
FastPass
, you’ll rarely have to wait longer than 20 to 25 minutes to board.  In the early morning and off season you can often board in as little as five to ten minutes. 
Kid’s Eye View:
  I like it.  There can be a long line, but less at night and it’s pretty at night.  It feels like you’re really in space, not just like a carnival ride, and I like the zodiac signs.

 

 

Autopia
(FP)
  Must be 32” or 81 cm tall to ride; must be 54” or 137 cm tall to ride alone. 
(
Opening Day
Attraction)

 

[
FastView:
A joyful journey through the back roads of
Tomorrowland
.  Kids and parents love this open-road adventure.
]

 

Since
Disneyland
first opened its gates, little ones have had their own special cars and freeways where they rule the roads. 
Imagineers
naturally named these Automobile Utopias
Autopia
s.

Autopia
is one of those attraction names that first-time (and even returning) Guests just can’t seem to master.  “Autotopia” is the usual mangle.  But whatever you call it, you’ll find its roads in the northeast quadrant of
Tomorrowland
, weaving gracefully above the
Tomorrowland Lagoon
and below the interlacing
Monorail
tracks.

Did you know there used to be two
Autopia
s?  It’s true;
Fantasyland
and
Tomorrowland
each had their own separate
Autopia
courses.  The
Tomorrowland
route was an
Opening Day
attraction.  The
Fantasyland
course began its life as
Junior Autopia
from 1956 to 1958, reopening with the
Fantasyland
tag in 1959.  The
Tomorrowland
and
Fantasyland
routes were finally combined in a massive overhaul at the end of the last millennium, re-launching in 2000 as the lengthy
Autopia
course that we know today.

There w
as also a relatively short-lived
Midget Autopia
, just to make things more confusing! 
Midget Autopia
lasted from 1957 to 1966, a gentle track that catered to the very tiny set too small for the other
Autopia
routes.  It was removed in part because it went against the grain of the
Disneyland
philosophy (all attractions are supposed to be accessible to parents as well as children—true family adventures) and also to make way for
“it’s a small world”

Midget Autopia
was transplanted to
Walt
’s boyhood town of
Marceline
,
Missouri
and operated there for a number of years before being completely retired.

From
Opening Day
, the sleek,
Bob Gurr
-designed miniature
Autopia
automobiles gave little ones an opportunity to rule the open road. 
Walt
, optimist and utopian that he was, wanted drivers of the future to be safer and more considerate than contemporary drivers, so his idea was to train children to be exemplary drivers from a very early age.

Of course, even in the buttoned-up 1950’s human nature was human nature. 
When the original
Autopia
tracks opened, pint-sized and some grown-up heck-raisers put the pedal to the metal, driving too fast, ramming other cars, and driving off the course.  Cars were damaged and Guests were in peril.

Over time,
Bob Gurr
and the
Imagineers
tinkered with the
Autopia
vehicles and courses.  Raised concrete guide islands were added to the center of the tracks to prevent drivers from leaving their lanes or the course. The cars remained stylish little facsimiles of Corvette Stingrays, but engines were adapted to limit the cars’ speed.  Signs were posted prohibiting behavior such as rear-ending other cars.  (Ironic side bar:  In an interview in later years,
Gurr
confessed that under the influence of two V.I.P. kids he was shepherding on
Opening Day
, he himself rammed Sammy Davis Jr.’s
Autopia
car!)

Thanks to those
safety changes, today’s
Autopia
is a safe and pleasant attraction, with cars whose top speed is less than seven miles per hour, just fast enough to be fun without being scary.

Passengers must be 32” or 81 cm tall, and solo drivers must be 54” or 137 cm tall.  You can measure your little one at the measuring
post near the queue entrance, to avoid fruitless waits if your child isn’t yet tall enough for this attraction.

The
Autopia
queue entrance is across from the northeast wall of
Innoventions
.  If the line is long, you’re well advised to bring your little ones to the nearby rest rooms behind the
Autopia Winner’s Circle
before getting in line.  The expansive queue space is largely un-shaded (something to keep in mind on brutally hot, bright days) but does, for a portion of the route, make a series of switchbacks on a raised platform under awnings.  If it’s a hot day, make sure you and your kids have bottles of water to sip in line and are wearing plenty of sunscreen.

As Guests wait, they can
pass the time by observing the loading and unloading of the cars below, or watch the mock commercials, knock-knock jokes, and safety instructions delivered by animated versions of the Chevron-sponsored
Autopia
cars on a giant video screen.

I confess that the
Autopia
queue is one of my least favorite in the park.  Cast Members typically seem frazzled and less friendly than their peers throughout the resort.  It might be the responsibility of running this attraction with real (albeit miniature) vehicles.  Also, the queue route can be confusing, particularly when it comes to the
FastPass
process; there are actually times when
FastPass
holders must wait while non-
FastPass
Guests enter the queue
ahead
of them.

Part of the challenge is that a lot of the wait time is directly under the
hot sun, or, if it’s winter, in the path of biting winds.  There’s also a lot of stopping and starting and winding around seemingly endless switchbacks.  Rarely do we emerge from the queue with smiles on our faces, no matter how chipper we were when we entered the line.

That said, once you and your little one board your vehicle
and actually start your journey, it’s pure euphoria from there on out.

Even if your
child isn’t tall enough to drive solo, he or she can sit in the driver’s seat and work the steering wheel.  You can sit in the passenger seat, working the gas pedal and helping to steer.

Be sure that both you and your child are safely buckled up. 
The cars don’t top seven miles per hour, and today’s
Autopia
drivers are typically conscientious, but you’re still about to drive a real (albeit tiny) vehicle around a course with other drivers.  The
Autopia
cars’ gas pedals are heavy; most small children can’t press the pedals themselves, ensuring that the adult driver or passenger is the one to control the speed.

When
you and your kids are safely belted, and the Cast Member gives you the OK, the driver or the adult passenger steps on the gas pedal. And off you go!

Whoever decided to combine the
Tomorrowland
and
Fantasyland
Autopia
tracks deserves a medal.  This is one of the longest and best journeys in the park.  For about five minutes, you and your child will drive through
Tomorrowland
and
Fantasyland
, seeing some of the best vistas in
Disneyland
.  Although your pace will be dictated to some degree by the cars ahead of and behind you, often you can set your own tempo, and at times you’ll feel like the only car on the road.

Your route will take you on freeways and on slightly jolting off-road courses. 
The roads are lined with trees, plants, shrubs, and miniature street lamps.  You pass frequently under the
Monorail
tracks, so don’t be surprised to see one of the gorgeous
Monorail
trains ghosting along above you at some point.  You’ll also drive under and across
Autopia
overpasses.

You and your child don’t need to get too hung up on the steering, as the guide islands pretty much keep you on course.  Take time to enjoy the scenery, and the sight of your kid’s happy face as he or she experiences
the fun and freedom of driving!

You’ll see
a colorful billboard advertising motor oil, designed like the vintage billboards that you’d have seen along a classic road like old Route 66 from Chicago to L.A.  You’ll see traffic lights, road signs, and statues: A bronzed statue of one of the genuine old
Midget Autopia
cars; a statue of an old jalopy; and a statue of two tiny
Autopia
cars that have crashed into each other and are each precariously balanced on their back tires, a warning, perhaps, to today’s little speed demons.

You’ll whisk past the towering, snowy
Matterhorn
Mountain
and the mesmerizing colors of the
Tomorrowland Lagoon
, where the bright yellow
Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage
subs begin their voyage.  Be sure to look up, down, all around as you journey, so you don’t miss any of the fun landmarks.

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