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Authors: Dontá Morrison

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BOOK: The End of the Rainbow
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“How could you say that about me?” he softly asked in disbelief.

“Would I be lying? Now what if you have met Mr. Right, and he is outside with Tyrin as we speak?” he watched a tear stream down his face and knew that he had touched a spot that needed to be touched. Sometimes tough love is what a person needs to get them back on the right track, or at least get them to look in the mirror.

“Baby, any beer left?” Tyrin asked as he walked into the kitchen and headed towards the fridge.

Andre stood by the entrance of the kitchen next to Tosha and sensed that something was being discussed that the two of them should not have interrupted. He looked at Kerrion and saw the redness in his eyes and under his breath he mouthed the words, “Are you alright?” Kerrion looked at him and lowered his head and tried to blink away any excess moisture. He struggled to gain his composure before he looked up at him. He offered a weak smile and mouthed, “I’m OK.”

“What’s going on?” Tyrin asked, as he held the two Sapporo’s in his hand.

“Nothing, we’re cool, just cutting onions. Is the grill lit?” Khalil asked.

“Yep, all yours. We’re going downstairs. I’m about to whoop Dre’s ass in some pool. I told him he ain’t ready for me, but he insists on being embarrassed. Kerry, you better tell your boy nobody beats me in my own house. Oh, by the way, you may want to throw some cold water on Spencer, because his ass is out like a light.” Tyrin said as he walked out of the kitchen and Tosha followed him. Andre gave Kerrion one last smile before turning to follow the host that was determined to beat him in a game he loved to play.

“You’re going to be OK.” Khalil said.

“I know.”

“Don’t let Jamar win, you owe it to yourself.”

“I know.”

“And from what my mother keeps on telling me, you haven’t stopped praising God. So, why haven’t you danced him under your feet? He is in the same boat as Satan, isn’t he? And according to the word of God, greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world. So what you need to do is come against the enemy, and put all your pain, hurt, anger and bitterness into God’s hands, and watch what happens. Let that fool go.”

“Don’t start preaching. I’ll tear your floor up shouting, Mr. Anointed-but-running-from-his-calling.”

“Whatever. And I highly doubt you will tear up my floor, do you know how much it cost?”

The two embraced and Khalil kept on assuring him that it was all going to work out for the good. They finished preparing the salad,

grilled the shrimp & vegetable skewers, steamed the rice, and set the table. The five men sat around the dinner table enjoying each other’s company and rehashing the events of the day. They knew that the rest of the night would bring more stories and they all were eager about attending the after party which was sure to be a comedic experience.

*****

The Hilton, one of the finer hotels near LAX, was now home to the gay brothers from, and visiting Los Angeles. One night a year, the illustrious hotel was overrun by gay men seeking a night of reckless abandon. Most of these men didn’t fit the stereotype of homosexuality. They were the brothers you would’ve sworn loved pussy –some still did- and everything attached to it. The range in appearance stemmed from men that looked like they just finished doing a drive-by in South Central Los Angeles; all the way to the beat faced queens that appeared to be fresh off a Christian Dior runway. With all of the diversity in the room, one thing was certain; the men here were all dick loving, ass humping, gay men. Some may have a girl or wife on the side; some may even have a couple of kids; but best believe they also had a few dudes scattered throughout town.

Khalil was standing at the base of the grand staircase holding an apple martini, talking to Spencer about nothing in particular. His hair was straightened to perfection, parted down the center, and gently resting on the back of his Hermes leather jacket. As the two of them conversed, a group of noisy, overdressed young queens came and stood in front of them. The leader of the coven began a conversation with Khalil and shared how he was on the prowl for a man he could fuck for the night. Khalil observes that the young beginner has no flavor whatsoever, but for entertainment purposes asks what type of dude he’s looking for. As the kid surveyed the room for a possible suitor, his eyes stop on a brother at the bar.

The gentleman picks up his drink, carefully makes his way through the crowd, and heads in their direction. As he walks toward them, his young admirer begins to fix his attire in preparation for the encounter. You can feel the excitement in the fellas, because to the best of their knowledge, he is coming to set their world on fire. Khalil and Spencer try not to let out a chuckle of laughter, but the scene is becoming more comedic with each passing second.

The chocolate brother has a casual and controlled walk that is sexy and seductive. He gets closer, cracks a gorgeous smile and kindly says, “Excuse me.” to the quartet of young new-gays.

“Wassup?” The young man says with sly anticipation.

“Can I get by please?”

“What?” The leader asks in obvious confusion.

“Move your young ass out the way, shit!” Tyrin exclaims with a scowl and a flinch of his body.

He steps through and looks at the young boy like he is stupid. Khalil looks at them and with a shrug of his shoulders he says, “You did make a good choice, you’re just five years too late. Sorry.” The guy rolls his eyes and makes a motion for his clique to follow. As they walk away Khalil hears one of them say, “He was too dark anyway.”

“What was that all about?” Tyrin asks.

“Just some girls in training.” Spencer answers.

“What are you drinking, baby?” Khalil asks Tyrin.

“A Long Island. Want some?”

“Nah, I’m cool on that one. I got to get up in the morning for church.”

“Oh yeah, that is tomorrow isn’t it.” Tyrin said.

“Church? Bitch, when you start going back to church?” Spencer asked.

“I didn’t. My cousin is dedicating her baby tomorrow and I have to show my support.”

“Oh. You going too Tyrin?”

“Nah. Church ain’t my thing. Never has been, never will be. Sunday is my day to do what the hell I want to do, and not follow the masses to a place that judges.”“OK. All of the extras were a little unnecessary, don’t you think.” Khalil said to Tyrin.

“Baby you know what I mean. I just don’t do church, that’s all.”

“Anyway. The last time I had a Long Island I threw up all over myself, remember that Spencer?”

“Do I? Hell yeah I remember. I’m the one that had to carry your drunken ass up two flights of stairs and clean that shit off of you.”

“Those were the days. We used to act a fool.”

“Well, I’m glad all of that is in your past, because if you get that drunk around me I’ll...” Tyrin started.

“You’ll what? You will carry me up two flights of stairs, and then knowing your freaky ass, try to get some while I’m vulnerable. So shut up.” Khalil said to Tyrin in a playful manner.

“Checkmate.” Spencer said, as he raised his French Connection in the air.

“Damn it’s crowded in here. Did a plane from Buckingham Palace land in this motherfucker, because it’s loaded with queens?” Kerrion asked as he walked up and entered the circle, hand in hand with Andre.

“It was worse last year,” Spencer said.

“Worse than this? This is ridiculous. I wasn’t expecting this at all. I could have honestly stayed at y'all house and watched a good movie.” Andre said

“I feel you. This is ridiculous. But look at it like this, now that you have experienced it, you can decide if you want to do it again next year,” Tyrin said.

“I’ve already decided. I don’t. I am not big on crowds and this is just too much for me. Kerry I hope you’re cool on all of this as well.” Andre said sternly.

“All I know is that if another brother tells you that your dreads are cute, I’m gonna bust him in his grill.”

“Baby, don’t worry, I’m here with you remember. No need to fight nobody, especially in here.” Andre said reassuringly.

“You need to realize that you are now dating a ghetto bitch. Don’t let the car, the apartment, or the expensive outfits fool you. This person right here next to you, is straight from the hood.” Khalil said to Andre.

“You damn right! Fuck these bitches in here. Did ya’ll see the wanna be diva bitch with the Jordache jeans and Squirrel fur coat. Talk about a raggedy motherfucker. He had the nerve to look

me up and down and roll his eyes from behind outdated Laura Biogatti sunglasses. It took all I had not to knock the shit out of that finger wave wearing bitch, looking like Rodney O and Joe Cooley.”

“Kerry, don’t start no shit up in here. Because you know if you fight, we all gotta fight. And I am not, I repeat, am not, in the mood to be in here tussling.” Spencer said.

“Calm down Kerrion.” Tyrin calmly said.

“Why ya’ll acting like I’m about to pull out a 12 gauge and start firing. I am simply saying that I deserve to be respected, and rolling your eyes at me when you’re looking broke down is totally unacceptable.” he said in his defense. “Especially in this messy ass environment. Fuck these bitches.” he added loud enough for the people within earshot to hear.

“We’re telling you to calm down because we know you. And you are hostile, plain and simple. So calm the fuck down, before we escort your ass out of here.” Spencer said.

“Are ya‘ll through chastising me?” He asked the group.

“Are you through showing out?” Tyrin asked

“Maybe.”

“Anyway, enough of this foolishness. Did you two go downstairs?” Khalil asked.

“Yeah we went. The music is bumping, but it’s crowded as all hell. I was trying to get my groove on with sexy here, but there was no room on the dance floor.” Andre said.

“Well I want to go see. Who is going with me?” Khalil asked as he grabbed Tyrins’ hand and headed towards the escalator.

Downstairs was ten degrees hotter than the lobby area, and along with the twenty dollar cover charge to get in, the five of them made

the best of an overcrowded situation. The room was stuffed with bodies partying like it was their last night on earth. The sexual fever of the room rose with songs that promised nights of long hard grinding, and climactic experiences.

Lil Kim was the token bad girl, with anthems that moved the crowd by asking, “How many licks”. Suga Free created a choir with his underground hit “Why you bullshitting?” because when the chorus hit, everybody chimed in. And as hard as everyone was already getting their groove on, nothing and nobody could resist Mystikal when he dared you to, “Shake it Fast”.

As the music thumped and bodies bumped, all that could be seen upon entrance to the room were silhouettes of male bonding in its most taboo of forms. Arms were waving in the air, hands around waists, dick to dick, or dick to ass; everywhere you looked you saw a brother moving to the rhythm caused by an artist that loved to get the party started. Artists that spit game about drugs, alcohol, sex, and street life, were the ones that took this club scene to the next level. Smooth love ballads were forbidden in this arena; only the hardcore tunes made with a stripper in mind were tough enough to punch a hole into the environment of the Los Angeles Black Gay Pride after-party.

Khalil grinded on Tyrin like he was waiting for dollar bills to be slipped down his pants. He rubbed his body against his lovers with the precision of a trained pole dancer trying to make money to pay overdue bills. Tyrin placed his hands on Khalil’s waist and kept up with the maneuvering of his baby like a jockey riding a horse. When one sped up, so did the other, with syncopated movements resembling an erotic ballet. They demonstrated how it was to be in tune with someone, how you can sense their next move, know their next step and feel their next heartbeat. As Monifah asked if you wanted “Touch It”, the two of them covered each other with sweat and made it evident that they knew how to fuck.

The five of them partied the night away and to their surprise there were no altercations of any kind. As the crowd began to thin out, many of the partiers made arrangements to meet up afterwards for one night stands caused by the heat of the moment. Khalil, Tyrin, Spencer, Kerrion, and Andre all exchanged hugs and went their separate ways. Two drove to Malibu, two went to Denny’s, and one debated on whether or not he would head home alone, or visit his ex-boyfriend that made an enticing proposition to him, earlier at the beach.

NINE

Khalil circled the block of the church three times before he saw a car about to pull out of a space. He noticed the line to get into the sanctuary was already wrapped around the building, and was in no mood to stand outside in the hot sun waiting to be herded in like cattle. However, he promised his mother and cousin that he would show up. He knew if he didn’t he would never here the end of it. On top of only getting a few hours sleep because Tyrin insisted on getting some ass before they went to bed, he had to drive all the way to South Central at what seemed like the break of day, just to go inside a building full of some of the same people he partied with the night before.

He parked the car, let up the top, and looked into the rearview mirror for one last overview. Not happy with the redness in his eyes, he reached into the glove box and retrieved the bottle of Visine he carried around for times like this. He tilted his head back, dispensed the fluid, and as he brought his head back into the upright position he noticed an older gentleman walking down the sidewalk staring directly at him. The salt and pepper haired man approached the side of the vehicle and gave him a head nod and an obvious “what’s up” smile as he continued on to the sanctuary. Khalil let out a sigh of irritation and mentally began to prepare himself to be surrounded by the ones that didn’t have a hangover from last night.

He exited the vehicle, retrieved his suit jacket from the back seat, and gave fake smiles to the other church attendees that bid him an honest good morning. He looked down the street at the growing line of people and knew that he was in for at least a twenty minute wait before the first morning service would be over and the new crowd would be allowed to enter. Exasperated already, he closed the car door, hit the alarm button and proceeded to walk towards the building that was filled with past memories. All he wanted to do was get in and get out, but something told him that he was about to be in store for one of the most irritating days of his life.

“Good Morning.” the greeter said to him as he entered the foyer of the building.

“Hi. How are you?” he replied.

“Blessed, thank you. Would you like a program?”

“Sure, why not.”

As he stood in the foyer, he peered through the glass windows that separated it from the main sanctuary and watched the people scurry to get to the front of the church like it was a Luther Vandross concert. The women were dressed to kill and the brothers weren’t looking too shabby either. He finally noticed his mother standing, talking to one of her prayer sisters.

Upon entrance into the grand auditorium he felt like all eyes were on him, -a bit arrogant but true- and as he walked down the aisle toward his mother he heard a voice call out his name. He nervously looked around and to his surprise it was a buddy the he grew up with. His eyes lit up like a Christmas tree and he yelled out with shocking enthusiasm, “What’s up Corny?”

The two stood in the aisle and hugged each other while the rest of the crowd forcibly kept moving past them. “How you been my brother. What’s up with you?” Cornelius asked with excitement.

“Man. Work, work, and more work. I’ve been busy trying to make it. How long have you been going here?” Khalil asked.

“About two years. Is this your first time here?”

“Man please, I grew up here. Sang in the choir and all that stuff. This was my stomping ground while you were out doing dirt and running from the law.”

“Word? So what are you now, one of those balcony brothers?” Corny asked.

“Naw dog. Just laying low, got tired of all of the drama,” He felt embarrassed by saying that but he had to be honest. “God knows my heart.” He shamefully responded and he could tell that Cornelius was about to try and recite the sinner’s prayer to him sohe cut him off before he started. “I know, I know. I should be doing better, but I just don’t have time for all of the hoopla.”

“Man, don’t wait until it’s too late, take it from me. I barely made it back. I was on the verge of a life sentence in jail, but God said otherwise.”

“What? What happened?”

“Long story. We’ll talk later. What brings you here today?”

“My cousin is dedicating her baby. There goes my mom right there.” He points to Vanessa and waves at the two of them.

“That’s your mom? Look at God. She prayed for me when I was at the lowest of lows. I love that lady.”

“Shut up fool.” Khalil said as he nudged him a little.

“Naw, for real man. Your mom ain’t no joke. I’m surprised you ain’t preaching by now, coming from her womb.”

“Whatever. Anyway it was good seeing you. Let me have your number and maybe we can do lunch one day.”

“Cool. You got a pen.”

“Nope. I’ll put it in my cell phone.”

Khalil took the number and the two exchanged a final hug. He resumed the chore of pressing his way to the seat his mother saved for him. After climbing over what seemed like fifty women wearing hats big enough to cause a solar eclipse, he finally settled into the seat next to Vanessa.

“I made it, just like I promised. You happy now?

“Well hello to you to Khalil. You know my friend Cornelius?” Vanessa said ignoring his sarcasm.

“Do I? He and I used to be wild back in high school. I was shocked as all outdoors when I saw him up in here. He said he knew you too.”

“He does. That boy has a testimony that is out of this world. He tore the place up when he told it. I think he has started seminary, if I’m not mistaken.”

“Seminary? Cornelius? You’re kidding right?” he asked.

“Kid for what, I am a grown woman. He already works with the prison ministry, so I think he just wants to go higher in his calling.”

“Wow. That’s a trip. Ole’ Corny, a preacher, who would’ve thought.”

“You should hang out with him and about his story; you will probably be brought to tears.”

“Yeah, we exchanged numbers. I’ll give him a call one day.”

The service was about to begin and as the praise team stepped onto the platform the entire sanctuary stood on its feet as they rendered selections by various artists. Khalil enjoyed this part of the service and couldn’t wait to hear what the actual choir was going to sing. This is the part of church he missed, the energy of if it all, the excitement and zeal that was expressed by everyone present. The move of the spirit and the falling of the anointing upon the people of God always captivated him.

After the Christening, it was time for the word to come forth. And by now he had forgotten all about how unsettled he was when he first arrived, and was looking forward to hearing what the man of God had to say. He wanted to hear what life-changing message would be delivered to the people by the chosen vessel of the Lord. The sermon was dynamic and extremely emotional, it was as though the Bishop was talking directly to him, and that was always astounding. His eloquence and charisma was beyond words and his deep felt love for God was admirable.

When it came time to have the altar call Khalil felt a tug on his heart to walk down for prayer but he didn’t want to be looked upon as someone that was only at church to use God. He had seen so many folks walk down the aisle, get saved and never be seen again. He simply sat and watched the bus loads of people flood the front of the church like lost sheep trying to find their way home. Many of them looked poor and destitute; some looked like drug addicts; others resembled gang members; while there were a few who just simply looked
normal
. He looked down at his brown suede Gucci loafers and knew if he went for prayer, they would say a few choice words about salvation and tell him to go back to his seat.Outside in front of the sanctuary, he and Vanessa stood talking to various members of the family. By the time Lauren walked up they were all ready to leave. It was cool when his family was together but Khalil knew they had their opinions of him, so he pretty much kept his distance. When they were younger, there was a closeness that he loved, but the more he began to evolve into who he currently was, the more space came between them. It wasn’t easy being the only homosexual in a family filled with ministers, evangelists, and other forms of church title, so he learned how and when to show his face.

“I’m about to leave momma.” He whispered in her ear.

“Me too. Lauren has invited all of her friends over for a swim and I need to get home to finish cooking.”

“I thought you weren’t cooking. And you didn’t care what she said because all those kids weren’t coming to your house.” He mockingly said to her.

“Shut up. Are you coming by to eat?”

“Yeah. I have to go home to change and pick up Tyrin.”

“Why didn’t he just come to church? That way the two of you could have came over right after church, saving time and gas?” she questioned.

“One thing he and I don’t discuss is church and religion. It keeps our arguments down to a minimum. So I’m going to change and we’ll be by later, OK.” he said kissing her on the cheek.

“Alright, let me get out of your business. See you later.”

“Bye, everybody. Talk to ya’ll later.” He said as he waved his hand to his family and friends.

“Khalil. You are coming by the house later, right?” Lauren asked.

“Yeah. I’ll be there.

“OK”

*****

Vanessa managed to get away from church without attending the various impromptu meetings that always seemed to occur after service. She raced into the house pinned her honey blond hair into a chignon and exchanged the St John two-piece ensemble for a more casual outfit that would flow with her mood. The majority of the meal had been prepared that morning before she went to church. All she had to do now was ensure that everything was in place by the time people arrived.

By three o’clock, the air in the home had changed drastically. There were young people throughout, eating, and having a good time. The guys were hovered in front of the big screen watching ESPN, and most of the girls were outside lounging on patio chairs next to the pool. After making sure that everyone was situated and fed, she retreated upstairs to her bedroom, sat on her chaise lounge, and watched Juanita Bynum preach on TBN.

Lauren played hostess while her mother rested. She was glad to be home and happy that she could have this moment with all of her childhood friends. She went from room to room, inside to outside, assuring that everyone was made to feel at home and having a good time.

“Lauren is Khalil coming?” her friend Monica asked while lowered herself into the pool.

“Yeah. He was supposed to have been here by now. I guess he’s stuck in traffic. I hope everybody knows they’re going to be on videotape. I need to have a memory of this moment for the times when I am lonely and homesick.”

“Girl, make sure that if any of those fine Berkeley boys ask who I am, you give me a call.” Another friend said.

“Trust, I got your back.” She assured her.

“Is your brother bringing his boyfriend?” Monica continued.

“Why?”

“Cause he looks good. With a capital G.” she said.

“Anyway.” Lauren tried to blow the girl off but she kept on.

“I wish I were gay so I could see if he is packing or not.”

“You are so nasty, shut up.”

“And your brother, oh my God, he needs to pose nude for a magazine or something. I’m sorry Lauren, you my girl and all, but Khalil has a nice ass.” Monica continued as she readjusted her bikini top.

“On that note I am going to get my camcorder.” Lauren was utterly disgusted by Monica’s crass comments about her brother. She was still trying to deal with the fact that her brother was gay,and couldn’t even attempt to entertain the thought of him having sex with another man.

“What’s up snicker?” Tyrin asked.

“Hi Tyrin! When did you get here?” She happily exclaimed while giving him a hug.

“About ten minutes ago. I was looking for you amidst all of the people, but I had to stop and make my plate before all the fried shrimp was gone.” He said hugging her tightly.

“It’s so good to see you. Where’s Khalil?” she asked while still wrapped in his arms.

“I think he’s still upstairs with mom. I better get up there quick before she reads me. You know how she is when it comes to respect, especially in her house.”

“I know that’s right. She will go on a straight warpath and embarrass you in front of everybody. Oh, by the way, you may want to steer clear of some of my friends. They still see you as a piece of meat ready to be tasted.”

“Good looking out. I will just kick it in the family room with the fellas and watch the game. Go see your brother; we’ll catch up when things settle down a little.”

“I will give him some time with mom before I go snatch him; you know how they need their uninterrupted quality time.” She gave him a peck on the cheek and went back to looking for her camcorder.

“Hi momma.” Khalil said as he entered her bedroom.

“Hey. When did you get here?” she asked with a smile.

“A few minutes ago,” He walked over and gave her a kiss on the forehead before sitting down at the foot of the chaise. “What you looking at?”

“Juanita Bynum. She’s tearing up the house as usual. She is an anointed woman of God. Remember how we saw her few of years ago and she wrecked the place?”

“I remember having to stand in line for two hours and then fighting for a seat,” he answered in disgust.

“But it was worth it, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah she was good. I remember she tied that sheet to a chair and started going crazy with it.” he stared blankly at the screen and drifted off in front of his mother. “Now that I think about it, she was actually very good. So anyway, are you going to stay up here all day?”

“Boy, I’m tired. I have been cooking since six this morning and then I went to church. I need some rest. Tomorrow is not a holiday; I have to go to work.”

“Momma, you own the company. You get there when you get there.”

“Not tomorrow, I have a meeting with a very important client. Matter of fact I need to be reviewing the budget again.”

“Want me to leave?” he asked.

“No. I’ll wait until things calm down. Did you want to talk to me about something?” she asked.

“Not really.”

BOOK: The End of the Rainbow
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