The Fire Walker (11 page)

"Ready?" she whispered in my ear.

I grabbed her hand and bolted the opposite direction, scattering people in our wake. A grin began splitting my face as we darted through the scores of pedestrians as the security guard chased us. I don't know why he bothered, maybe he wanted to look like a tough guy. Bumping shoulders and shouting apologies, we darted across the street and when we realized we weren't being followed anymore, Zoe pulled me into an alley off the main drag.

Laughing, I let go of her hand and leant back against the wall. Not exactly the episode of COPS they had planted in my brain, but as close as I wanted to get.

Zoe stooped forward with her hand on her knees. "I think he chased us for like, a block and a half before he gave up."

"I didn't think he'd last that long."

"It's like four hundred meters," she rolled her eyes.

"I didn't think he'd get past one."

"Wasn't exactly living on the edge, more like making a nuisance of ourselves, but it did the trick."

"What's the trick?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

She tapped her temple and smiled.

A few minutes later, Will appeared around the corner. "Guys, that was gold."

"Got some good stuff?"

"This shit's gunna go viral." He gave the camera to Zoe and she turned her back, watching the footage with a stupid grin on her face.

"Can I say something?" Will asked, eyeing Zoe.

"Sure." My thoughts were still plastered on our stupid little stunt or otherwise I would've told him to drop it.

"Anyone with eyes in their head can see how messed up you are about this Jessie thing."

I narrowed my eyes. In a way, I kinda expected him to say something about that, but right at that moment? Hell, no.

"Mate, all I'm saying is that if you want her that much, more than just a one time thing, then you should do something about it."

He had no idea what she'd done. Of course he didn't. I'd said absolutely zilch about it. "I can't."

"Perseverance and balls," he said, looking back at Zoe. "If she's who you want, then that's what it takes."

I didn't want someone who didn't want me. Simple. You didn't run off on someone you wanted in the middle of the night. "Will, I appreciate the advice and all, but it's not going to work out. I'm not going after her." I couldn't, more like it. That kinda shit hurt a man's pride.

He grimaced and clapped me on the shoulder. "If you say so."

"I know so."

"Honey pie, sweet cheeks," Zoe chortled, coming back towards us. "You amaze me every day."

"Nothin' sweet about these cheeks," Will said, taking the camera off her.

"Wanna go again?" Zoe asked me, shoving her hand in the back pocket of Will's jeans.

"Once is enough," I said. "I haven't run that far since year ten PE."

"Okay, but I'm hungry," Will grumbled, nodding back towards the street.

"Burgers?" Zoe poked me in the gut.

"Sure."

As Will wandered off in front of us, she slipped an arm through mine. "It was more than like for you wasn't it?" she murmured in my ear.

I grinded my teeth together. She'd obviously been doing a lot of thinking about it and I didn't know if that was a good thing.

"I saw the way you looked at her."

My blood started to boil. Why wouldn't she just leave it alone?

"If you want her..."

"
Zoe
," I snapped, running both my hand over my face. She flinched, stepping away from me and I instantly felt like shit. "I'm sorry, I... I don't want to talk about it. It's over. It's so over." Obliterated, smashed, broken, scarred, humiliated. I was all of those things right now.

"Do you want me to stay with you tonight?" she asked, reaching out for my hand.

"No," I shook my head, sinking back. "I just need some alone time." The notion was so out of character for me, she gave me 'the look'. I wasn't fooling anyone.

"Okay." She stood on her tiptoes and kissed me on the cheek. "But first, burgers."

"Big fucking greasy burgers."

The one thing I didn't want to do was say goodbye to Zoe. In the whole time I'd known her, we'd probably spent one or two days away from each other at a time. I was twenty five years old. I had to grow up a little. I was capable of looking after myself… wasn't I?

I stood on the footpath across the street from the hotel helping Will load their rental car with their luggage. They didn't really have much, a suitcase each and Zoe's guitar because like me, she couldn't go anywhere without it.

"Thanks, Dee," Will said, closing the boot. He grinned when he saw Zoe sidle up to me and without another word, he got into the car to give us a minute. It took him a while to get the thing we had, but I'd never ever come between them. He was the best thing to happen to her in a very long time.

I reached up and tucked Zoe's wild hair behind her ear. "Gunna miss you, Hot Legs."

"Have you decided what you're gunna do?" she asked, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

I'd thought about it the night before. They were going on their own road trip, maybe I should do my own version. The kind where I just started driving with no destination in mind. You know, see where the asphalt took me. "I'm going for a long drive into the sunset."

"A road trip?" she exclaimed.

"Why not?"

"On your own? Is that a good idea. Isn't there billions of crazy people out in backwater America?"

"I'll be fine, Zo. I'm not going to let anyone do a
Deliverance
on me. I seriously doubt I'll be going anywhere off a main highway."

She bit her lip, a frown creasing her forehead. "I worry about you, you know."

"I know you do."

"Are you sure you don't want to come with us for a few days?"

"I'm sure, Zo. This is your time with Will. Hell, you've been looking forward to this for ages. I'm not gunna rain on your parade."

"I don't mind you being there."

"Zo, it'll be okay. I'll be okay. I just need a little time on my own. That's all."

She smiled thinly.

"I have to get out of LA first," I groaned, thinking about the crazy traffic.

"You know, I'm kinda terrified about driving on the opposite side of the road. I'm making Will drive."

"And the opposite side of the car," I added.

"Weird, right?"

"It's different."

"You'll be okay, though?"

"I'll call you every few days so you know I'm not dead in a ditch somewhere."

She slapped me on the arm, making my skin smart. "Promise?"

"Cross my heart."

"Hope to die."

"Pins and needs in my eye."

"Eat a horse…"

"Manure pie," I declared, ending off the childish rhyme.

"How old are you?" she laughed.

"Old enough to know better and young enough to keep doing it."

"Don't go Thelma and Louise on me."

"In your dreams, Hot Legs."

"Now, that would be a dream..." she said suggestively.

"You're not picturing me and Will tearing up the highway and terrorizing truckers are you?"

"You bet your sweet cheeks I am."

"Zoe," I groaned. 

"I'm gunna miss you, Dee Dee." She threw her arms around my neck, burying her face in my shoulder.

I wrapped my arms around her waist and breathed in her familiar scent. Kissing her hair I said, "I'm gunna miss you, too." Like she wouldn't believe.

Her tattoo was of honeysuckle and butterflies. I never asked if it meant anything.

I stared at myself in the bathroom mirror and wondered what I'd been wondering the past two days. What was so wrong with me? Maybe that's what I was meant to find out. These quarter life crisis' and epic road trips were all about that crap, right? Finding yourself amongst the pile of shit that the universe molded you into.

The world wanted me to be a foul mouthed, bad boy rock star who slept with a different girl every night. The idea didn't seem feasible. Not for the things I wanted and definitely not after the night I'd spent with Jessie. That would be seared into my mind and body for the rest of my life.

Dumping my stuff into my bag, I cleared out the rest of the hotel room, cramming clothes into my oversized duffle bag. It was time to get outta Dodge and start looking forward. At least that's what I was trying to convince myself.

Movies, books... stories about love and happiness, they teach you if you suffer enough, then it'll all work out in the end. But, I'd never known suffering. I wasn't sure how much was too much. And besides, it wasn't going to end happily for me. Not with Jessie. I needed to find my happy place again. I'd strayed from the path and got lost in the woods.

Step one. Check out of the Heartbreak Hotel. Step two. Find the nearest rental joint and blow this popcorn stand to smithereens.

Downstairs, the woman at the counter checked me out and directed me two blocks down to a rental company that the concierge recommended. Slinging my heavy bag on my back, I pushed through the front doors out into the sunshine, determined to get gone.

The rental office was empty save for a woman behind the desk when I walked in. Dumping my bag in the corner and sitting my guitar case against the wall, she eyed me with interest. I knew that look, it was one that I got often and usually played up to, but not today. There was no way that was going anywhere and I wasn't interested in meaningless.

"How can I help you?" she smiled brightly, flipping her obviously unnatural red hair over her shoulder.

"I wanna rent a car."

"Certainly. Any preference?" She gestured towards my stuff.

"Something with a large boot so I can put my guitar back there."

She cocked her head, confused. "Boot?"

"Trunk, I mean trunk." If it wasn't already enough that I'd had to explain every word that came out of my mouth, I'd probably have to forget everything I ever knew about driving if I was as going to get out of LA alive and without an excess charge on my card.

"Sure, we have a compact four wheel drive..."

"Sure."

"How long do you need..."

"A month." I guess if I needed more then I could just rent another.

"Where will you be returning the vehicle?"

Shit. Didn't know that either. Some great plan this was.

The clerk preempted my answer. "That's fine. I can just put it in as our office here in LA and if you need to alter it, just give us a call." She smiled at me in a way that was more than customer friendly.

"Sure. Whatever." As long as the end of this conversation ended with car keys in my hand, I didn't care.

The longer I stood there and the longer this obviously nice woman tried to hit on me, the more my heart sunk into the hole that Zoe had tried so hard to pull me out of.

The woman took my drivers license and tapped a few things into her computer and I was signing on the dotted line.

I looked at the set of keys in my hand and hardly listened as she rattled off a list which I assumed was the terms and conditions. Damage and liability. Living life was a liability, but they didn't charge your credit card the excess for that.

"Sir?" The clerk was waving a piece of paper under my nose.

"Thanks," I took the paperwork and it wasn't until I was out the door and into the parking garage that I realized she'd written her phone number across the top. Estelle. The goes the world and it's preconceived notions again.

An image of Jessie flashed in my mind and I could almost feel her lips on mine. Cursing, I shook my head and stormed up the line of parked cars, pressing the button on the fob. Orange lights flashed a few spaces up and I opened the boot, stashing my stuff.

I'd thought about which way to go, of course I had. The obvious choice would be to go to Las Vegas, but that's where Will and Zoe had gone. Following them wouldn't be a good idea. I could go to Flagstaff, then to the Grand Canyon on the less touristy side. I didn't want bright lights. I wanted stars and silence for a change.

Out of habit, I went for the right hand side of the car, but circled around to the left with a curse. This was going to be fun. Capital fucking F.