The Invisible Husband (14 page)

She peeked
around the door again and stared at the shock of black hair now
sprouting from the top of the newspaper. As she watched his relaxed
legs were brought sharply to a square and then the right leg hooked
over the left. It brought to mind a snail recoiling into its shell
for protection. Compressing nervous giggles she took a deep breath
and stepped into the dining room blind to the footman standing at
attention a few steps behind her husband. Shivering, she clutched
his shawl as a security and bravely marched through cold sunlight.
Stopping next to the broadsheet she stared transfixed by elegant
fingers clutching the paper; those magical fingers could make her
feel…

“Is there
something you require my Lady?” The cold husky whisper floated over
the paper barricade slighting her eager heart. Eve grimaced as the
previously exhilarated creature in her chest slumped into stunned
silence. He didn’t even try to look at her. It wasn’t the greeting
she’d expected.

“I didn’t…” She
sniffed back unexpected tears. “I didn’t find a love letter on my
bed this morning.”

“Good! If my
footmen wrote you love letters I’d have to sack them. It’s so hard
to find a well trained footman these days isn’t it Davis?”

“As you say my
Lord.”

Tears gushed
from her eyes spattering her shawl with prisms of light. “I meant a
letter from you!”

“Perhaps
tomorrow I’ll wake up feeling suitably gormless. In which case I
shall spew my heart onto paper and leave it stabbed to your
pillow.” Eve flinched as her heart slumped to the floor of its cage
causing shock waves that erupted into sobs. Covering her face with
the shawl, her desire to run from the room was impeded by an
inability to move. “I’d give you my handkerchief, but I’d have to
put down my paper. I think it best I remain an invisible husband,
don’t you?”

A protective
layer of anger swept through Eve’s body as she raised her arm and
smashed the paper screen in two. “No I don’t!”

Both the bleary
green eye and dead white eye were blood shot and framed by red
rims. “Another hock and soda Davis.”

“Yes my Lord.”
Eve stared into the green eye until it looked away to accept the
requested glass.

“Kindly whisper
Madam, my head is being hammered from the inside.”

His unforgiving
tone was almost as hurtful as his dismissive glance. “Good!” The
word thundered off the ornate ceiling. “Perhaps next time I upset
you, you won’t try to drown yourself with wine. Perhaps you’ll
storm about the garden cursing women or throw things at me like a
sensible man.”

“I would have
thought you’d welcome my demise; you’d certainly never have to look
at me again.” Her demon was visibly trembling as the single pain
filled eye looked away. “You’d be free to win boring Herbert’s
heart. Wouldn’t that be a relief?”

“I have no
desire to marry Herbert or any other bore…”

The bright
green eye swivelled back to her face in disbelief. “You’re deluding
yourself Madam. You find me repulsive; do you expect me to believe
you wish to remain shackled to a monster? I was distressed…you
couldn’t bear to touch me.”

“Davis; did I
or did I not help put my drunk husband to bed yesterday?”

“Yes in deed my
Lady.”

“Did I shrink
from touching him?”

“No my
Lady.”

“Did I at any
time try to smother him, abuse him or hasten his death?”

“I don’t
believe so my Lady.”

The green eye
narrowed in disbelief, “I don’t remember you assisting me to
bed.”

“I even
buttoned the trouser flap you left hanging open. You looked like
one of those wretched creatures in the gutter lolling about too
drunk to notice they’re indecent.” A red tide rushed up his neck
and over his pale cheeks as green eye fixed on the table in
humiliation. “Don’t you remember anything from yesterday?”

The green eye
swivelled back to her face. “I remember drinking to forget the look
on your face after you rudely burst into my room and discovered
that I’m hideous.” The words were sharp and bitter, like rhubarb
crumble without the sugar.

“Of course I
was horrified. One minute I thought you were a thieving footman and
the next I find the footman is my demon-Lord in the flesh. What did
you expect me to feel, overjoyed? I was frightened; my husband was
a living shadow, a cloaked demon.”

He leaned
towards her in disbelief. “Well I’m the shadow who rescued you from
that snake. I’m the man who held you the other night. I’m the man
you’ve been kissing.”

Eve could hear
he was upset so she softened her words as she tried to explain, “I
know, but you’re a stranger; I’ve been kissing a demon…”

“So now you can
see I’m repulsive, I’m a stranger? It must make you feel sick,
knowing I touched you.”

Eve took a deep
breath and reminded herself that the sneering man was reacting like
a heartless cad because he felt rejected. She kept her voice soft
as she tried again to explain. “My Lord, you’re flesh and
blood…”

“Yes…hideous
flesh and blood!”

“Please don’t
sneer at me. I’m trying to explain; I’ve been kissing a faceless
demon.”

“It must
disturb you to discover your dream lover was really a
nightmare.”

Eve lost her
temper and snapped back, “He was a dream; he was good and kind.

If anything
disturbs me it’s that you’re acting like a sneering swine possessed
by a devil.”

He jerked to
his feet and glowered down at her, causing Eve’s heart to faint and
her knees to tremble. “I am not sneering at you!”

“Yes you
are.”

“No I’m
not!”

“You are.”

“I’m not; I’m upset at being rejected.”

“I didn’t
reject you. I merely discovered you were hideous. You’re the one
who rejected my apology. You’ve rejecting me!”

His angry
expression was overtaken with confusion. “What apology?”

“I told you I
was disappointed that I didn’t receive a love letter this
morning.”

Her husband’s
brow crinkled in pain. “That wasn’t an apology. It was a statement
I assumed meant you were hoping for another bejewelled broach to
add to your growing collection.”

“It was an
admission that I was sorry I hurt your feelings.”

Adam rubbed his
eyes with one hand. “You merely stated that you thought you’d
receive another love letter. That has nothing to do with an
apology.”

“Of course it
does, why would I expect you to write me a love letter if you were
still upset with me? And how would you not be upset with me if I
hadn’t apologised? Clearly my stated desire was an apology.”

“Your female
logic is making my head worse.”

Eve’s limp
heart demanded she offer another olive branch. “I’m sorry I hurt
your feelings. Can’t we forget yesterday and start over? I don’t
want you to be upset with me.”

“What good is
an apology? You’ll still think me hideous.”

Feeling
slapped, Eve blinked in pain. “So you’re hideous, you told me that
yourself.”

“But I don’t
want my wife to think I’m hideous!”

Eve rolled her
eyes in irritation and ignored her wailing heart. “Your male logic
is as sensible as a six legged horse.”

“It makes
perfect sense. I wanted you to fall in love with me before you saw
my ugly face so you wouldn’t care…so you’d love all of me, so you’d
think I was beautiful.”

“Well then you
should have put on a stupid eye patch and courted me in person. All
you had to do was be yourself and Cupid’s arrow would have knocked
me off my feet. Did you court me? No, you acted like a lunatic and
bought me by post like an ordered hat. I’m sorry my reaction hurt
your feelings, but it’s your own fault. If I’d first seen you in an
eye patch I’d probably never have noticed how hideous you are
without one. I’d probably think you the most beautiful pirate-Lord
ever born, but no you don’t like musical pirates so now I think
you’re hideous and it’s your own fault.”

Lord Latham’s
embarrassed flush had receded leaving his face deathly pale. “Do
you wish to add any more insults to your list Madam or don’t you
think the stupid creature in my chest has been wounded enough?”

Eve’s anger
evaporated as she remembered he loved her. “I’m sorry the truth
hurts your feelings, but it’s still the truth.” Eve stared over the
edge of her shawl into the hypnotic green eye until it left her
face and travelled slowly down her person and then slowly back up
to her face.

“Are you aware
Madam that your white nightdress is transparent in sunlight?” It
was Eve’s turn to blush with horror as she covered her face with
the shawl unintentionally exposing more flesh. “You’re practically
naked. I suggest you dress, preferably in something more
substantial than an apron of fig leaves or that rag you wore
yesterday. As you’ve chosen to remain my wife, I must warn you that
I won’t share your charms with my servants or my neighbours.”

Eve blinked in
shock as insolent whisper snapped her heart like a whip. “All my
dresses are cut that low, I protested, but Mother insisted. She
thought you’d like it.”

“Your mother’s
a fool.”

Eve opened her
throat and screamed back, “Yes, only a fool would sell her daughter
for ten thousand pounds to have a Lord in the family. I didn’t even
know the name of my new owner until I reached the altar; do you
think I was pleased to be sold off like a mindless cow to a
faceless man? I was terrified! I thought only a lunatic would buy a
wife unseen…but then you spoke and I knew I’d be safe. Do you blame
me for not wanting to go back? Do you blame me for being relieved
that you’re not the Earl of Mulgrave?”

Her husband
flushed as he glanced towards the servants. “The dining room is no
place for hysterics. If I’ve upset you I recommend you retire to
the library and write your grievances on a piece of paper. I shall
give your concerns my full attention when my head stops aching. In
the mean time abusing me will not make me happy.”

“It’s not my
place to make you happy. I’m your Countess, not your court
jester.”

“Then pray take
note Madam; a lady doesn’t scream at her Lord in the dining room,
nor does she wander about the house clad in woven spider silk. A
lady may become upset, but she doesn’t show it before the
servants.”

“Thank you for
that lesson in courtly manners my Lord. I shall certainly remember
to conduct myself with due consideration to my new found station.
Heaven knows I wouldn’t want to embarrass my new master. He might
forget that he said he wouldn’t ever hurt me.” The words were
screamed in fury, leaving no doubt to her true feelings. Taking a
deep breath she sniffed back her tears and carried on in a more
normal tone. “Yes, I’m angry. It’s a normal state of being for a
woman whose heartfelt apology is snubbed by a haughty vain
intemperate husband who thought he’d bought a submissive simpering
Miss. Well, I’m not submissive which is why my parents refused to
tell me who my new husband would be. They knew I’d hunt you down
and scratch out your remaining eye for trying to buy me…”

“Eve…”

“Adam, if you
don’t care about my feelings then I don’t see why I should care
about yours. I thought you were good and kind. I must be stupid!”
Eve turned and ran back to her room where she crawled back into bed
and sobbed into her pillow until there was nothing left to cry.
Exhausted, she slumped back into a world of nightmares, but there
was no silencing her injured heart. It was determined to love the
unlovable. Even in her dreamless sleep it called for its master in
a faint hopeless whisper, ‘Adam…Adam…Adam…’

“Another hock
and soda.” Collapsing into his chair, Adam rubbed his aching
temples and wondered how love could make him feel so euphoric one
day and so damnably awful the next. He accepted the full glass from
his footman and then eyed the man with irritation as Davis remained
at his side. “Is there something you’d like to add to my wife’s
diatribe? Shall you join her in reviling my face and questioning my
vanity or shall you second my opinion that I’m a heartless bastard?
She hates me…I want to die…”

“Forgive my
impertinence my Lord, but I believe Lady Latham is in love with
you.”

Adam’s head
snapped back as the words thundered through his brain and rattled
the cage around his heart. “How the devil do you know what my wife
feels?”

“Your good Lady
appears to feel comfortable in expressing her feelings for you in
front of other people. Attending you yesterday afternoon, we all
saw the way she held you. It was most peculiar.”

“Peculiar? When
did she hold me?” Adam’s heart pressed against its cage in rapture.
“What are you talking about?”

“On being
informed of your drunken state, Lady Latham insisted on helping
you. After we removed your coat she ordered us to settle you
properly on the bed. You stank strongly of wine and bodily fluids
my Lord. You had sick on your waste coat; only a woman who loved
you would have touched you, let alone held you for hours in an
intimate embrace.”

“What? Are you
saying she held me while I slept?”

“Indeed my
Lord.”

“Hours?”

“Yes my
Lord.”

“Why didn’t you
tell me this earlier?”

“I thought you
knew.”

“I’m hung over,
how the hell would I know?”

“You remembered
why you became upset; I assumed you knew what followed.”

“Is there
anything else of import I should know?”

“You looked
supremely content lying on her bosoms as she stroked your hair. I
believe you thought you’d died and gone to heaven my Lord.”

“Hell’s
teeth…what have I done?”

“You refused
her apology and tried to make her feel guilty for thinking you
hideous.”

“Thank you
Davis, I didn’t need a synopsis.”