The Iron Knight (The De Russe Legacy Book 3) (29 page)

Because the shutters were closed, they couldn’t see the bailey or what was happening beyond. More than once, Sophina paused in her tasks, her attention turning towards the entry to the keep, now bolted and braced. It was the last place she had seen Lucien and in the solar where the young women were organizing things, her gaze kept drifting to the heavy oak table where Lucien had taken her. It made her feel flushed simply to look at it, her heart fluttering against her ribs at the memories of his touch. It was difficult to keep the smile from her face so she tried not to think about it, focusing, instead, on the tasks at hand. But, Sweet Mary, it was difficult.

One of the other results from Sophina’s trip to the kitchens was the fact that she had been able to reclaim her clothing from the washerwoman, who had spent the previous evening scrubbing everything out and putting them out to dry.

When Sophina had entered the kitchen yards, she had seen her clothing, as well as Emmaline’s, strung up on hemp ropes, drying in the sun. They were clean and didn’t smell of the swampy lake, so she had collected the items that were completely dry and took them back to the keep. The result was that she was in her own clothing now and so was Emmaline. Dressed in a durable broadcloth dress with a leather girdle and broadcloth apron, she was much more comfortable than she was in Juno’s tight clothing.

And it was dirty work, too, moving stores into the solar and locking up the keep. Some of the shutters that covered the ventilation windows appeared to have not been closed, or cleaned, in years, so there was a great deal of dust on them. There were even spiders. One fell on Emmaline’s arm at some point and the girl screamed as if Lucifer had just appeared and demanded her soul. That had made Juno and Aricia laugh uproariously. Even Sophina had grinned at her dramatic daughter; it
had
been rather humorous.

As the morning deepened and the stores were arranged, thoughts moved to breaking their fast. The younger women were quite hungry. There was fresh bread, wrapped up in sacks, and there were also dissected wheels of white cheese, cut into sections so they wouldn’t be so heavy to carry.

Sophina had the young women bring forth the bread and cheese as well as jars of pickled fruits and fresh apples. They spent some time tearing the bread apart and cutting the apples and the cheese. Sophina found a big spoon in all of the things she had brought from the kitchens and spooned the spiced, pickled pears and some cherries into two small wooden bowls. They were quite tart, but quite good. As the three young women began to delve into the food, Sophina’s thoughts inevitably turned to the young girl on the floor above.

She’d not heard a peep out of Susanna since the spanking yesterday. Odd, considering how much the girl had screamed up to and including that spanking. Spying a tray over on another table in the solar, a table littered with maps and other items, Sophina removed a pitcher of stale wine and three dirty cups from the tray and loaded it up with bread and cheese and small apples. The girls, stuffing their faces, noticed what she was doing.

“Where are you going with that, Mama?” Emmaline asked, her mouth full.

Sophina took one of the two bowls of pickled fruits and put it on the tray as well, balancing it out with the other items on the tray. “I am taking this to Lady Susanna,” she said. “She must be famished.”

Emmaline swallowed the bite in her mouth, frowning. “You are being kind to a girl who threw things at you.”

Sophina cocked an eyebrow at her ungracious child. “And I am supposed to let her starve because of it?” she said. “Now, that
would
be very unkind, wouldn’t it?”

“But she was very naughty. She should be punished.”

“I
did
punish her. Now I am to let her starve, too?”

Emmaline didn’t have an answer for her mother, whom she thought was being much too kind to a nasty little girl. She went back to her food but, sitting next to Emmaline, Aricia stood up from her seat.

“I will go with you,” she said. “May I help?”

Sophina nodded. “That would be appreciated, my lady.”

As Emmaline and Juno turned back to their food, Aricia accompanied Sophina from the chamber. Aricia held the heavy door open for her and then closed it again once she passed through. Together, they moved up the narrow spiral stairs.

“I did not have the opportunity to tell you that your scarf is lovely today,” Sophina said. “My daughter told me that you personally embroider them.”

Aricia was clad in an unbleached linen dress, very simple, with a yellow scarf over her head, across her face, and draped down over her shoulders. She nodded to Sophina’s statement.

“I do, my lady,” she said. “I have always liked to sew and create things. My mother was an excellent seamstress and she taught me her skills.”

Sophina was moving slowly up the stairs, afraid of tripping on the slippery stones. “You are very talented,” she said. “And I have not yet had the chance to mention to you that when I was in the kitchens this morning, I managed to find both honey and a small sack of cinnamon. I shall mix a potion for you after we are finished eating and you can try it upon your skin.”

Aricia was very interested. “Thank you, my lady, I am very grateful,” she said eagerly. “And you will show me how to do it?”

“Aye.”

“You also mentioned something about making vinegar from apples? Will you show me how to do that, too?”

Sophina nodded as they reached the top of the stairs. “It is quite simple, truly,” she said. “You may take apple peels and cores, mix them with some honey and warm water, and let all of it sit for several weeks and it will make vinegar. You may use that to wash your skin. I believe it will help a great deal.”

Aricia was brimming with the great and wonderful things she was going to do, under Sophina’s instruction, to help her skin condition. She hadn’t felt so much hope in a very long time. As she followed Sophina to the door of the
mal enfant
, she put a hand on Sophina’s arm, gently begging the woman to pause.

“Wait,” Aricia said softly just as they reached the oak panel. “I… I would like to say something before you knock on the door.”

Sophina turned to her attentively. “Of course.”

Now that Aricia had Sophina’s attention, she suddenly seemed uneasy. “I… I just want to say that you have been extremely kind to me. I do not have any friends, save my cousin, and you and your daughter have been very… kind. So very kind. I do not know if I can ever thank you enough for the friendship you have shown me but I wanted you to know that you have my undying gratitude.”

Sophina smiled at the awkward young woman. “It is our pleasure,” she said. “I am glad Emmaline has become your friend. She is a good girl. I hope she stays your friend for years to come.”

Aricia nodded, still seemingly uncertain, as if she had more to say but couldn’t quite speak of it. She averted her gaze even though her hand was still on Sophina’s arm. Firm, long fingers with soft, pale hair on the knuckles.
A man’s hand.

“I want to explain something to you, my lady,” she said, so softly that Sophina barely heard her. “Yesterday, when you examined my skin, you saw… my face, my neck. You saw… I know what you saw. I was born as you see. I have been wearing clothing such as this for as long as I can remember. I do not want to be what I am… only what I was meant to be. My mother and grandmother understood that. I just wanted you to know that I have always been this way. I… I cannot explain it more than that, my lady, but you have my thanks for not turning away in disgust or telling anyone what you saw. I am… grateful.”

Sophina knew what she was trying to say; it was clearly painful for her to speak of it, struggling over her words as she did. No doubt, her desire to dress as a woman was strange. According to the teachings of the church, it could also be considered heresy in violation of God’s moral code. Men were men, women were women, and the church frowned upon the manner in which Aricia was living her life.

Nonetheless, Sophina’s opinion remained the same – this gentle creature lived the life she chose to live and it wasn’t Sophina’s place to judge. That was up to God. Therefore, she sought to put Aricia at ease.

“I saw a young woman with angry red skin that I hope to help,” she said simply. “That is all I saw.”

Aricia’s eyes widened. “You… but you saw….”

“I know what I saw. And I know how kind you have been to my daughter. That is all I truly know.”

Aricia stared at her a moment, her eyes growing moist. It was apparent that she hadn’t expected such a reaction. “I… I sought to clarify because I did not want you to think I was trying to lie to you or pretend I was something I am not,” she said. “I was born Aric. But Aric died when I was a baby and I have ever been called Aricia. My mother… my mother wanted a girl-child when I was born. I have never known anything else but dressing and living as a girl.”

Sophina’s smile faded. “Then your mother made you who you are?”

Aricia shook her head. “Nay,” she said. “Not in the sense that she forced me. But she dressed me in beautiful things and I loved it. I have always loved it. This is who I am.”

Sophina didn’t particularly understand what Aricia said, but she accepted it. “If you are happy, that is all that matters.”

Aricia sighed heavily, as if a great weight had been lifted from her slender shoulders. “I am happy where I am,” she said. “I am happy with Juno. I am her spinster cousin and that is all anyone need know.”

Sophina’s smile returned, a gentle gesture. “Then I am happy for you,” she said. “But… Juno’s father. Does he know the truth?”

Aricia shook her head. “Nay,” she said. “He never will. I met him for the first time when I was seven years of age, so he has always known me as a female. He will never know the truth. He is a difficult and harsh man. I fear he would not be quite so accepting.”

Sophina felt pity for gentle Aricia and the life she led. Even if she said she was happy, still, there could be complications if her secret was revealed. It must have been difficult to live that way.

“You are the bravest woman I know,” Sophina said, “and I wish you nothing but joy. Now, shall we feed this terrible child before my arms fall off? The tray is heavy.”

Aricia giggled and knocked on the panel. Both women stood back, away from the door, as if fearful of what would come flying through it. But there was no response after the first knock so Aricia knocked again. She even took the tray from Sophina to relieve her of the burden. Just as Sophina handed over the tray, the door creaked open.

It was just a crack, really, with a black eye peering through it. Sophina recognized Lady Susanna’s old nurse.

“My lady,” Sophina greeted politely. “An army has been sighted and Sir Lucien has asked me to lock up the keep and take charge of the occupants. I have brought a meal for you and Lady Susanna. May I deliver it?”

The old woman didn’t say a word. She simply stood back, opening the door wide so Sophina and Aricia could enter. Holding out a hand to Aricia, begging the woman to remain where she was, Sophina hesitantly stepped through the doorway, preparing for pewter cups to come flying out at her. The first thing she saw was Susanna, sitting in one of the small chairs in the corner of the room that held all of her playthings. The pewter set was in front of her, on the table, but she didn’t make any move to pick anything up, at least not yet. Still, she didn’t look at Sophina; she had a poppet in her lap and that was all she was looking at.

“Good morn, Lady Susanna,” Sophina said evenly. “I have brought your morning meal. Would you like to have it placed on the table before you?”

Susanna didn’t look up. “Go away,” she said glumly. “I am not hungry.”

Sophina could see that nothing had changed since last night. “You might not be now but you will be at some point,” she said. “I will leave the tray here and you may eat at your leisure.”

With that, she motioned Aricia in, who slipped in, trying not to gape at the opulence of the chamber. Sophina pointed to a small table over near the hearth and Aricia moved to it, swiftly, with Sophina behind her. Together, they removed the items from the tray and set them down on the very pretty painted table. In fact, Aricia was having difficulty absorbing the beauty of everything in the room; it was the most beautiful room she had ever seen.

Sophina silently motioned towards the door and Aricia nodded, but she didn’t follow when Sophina moved towards it. In fact, Sophina was all the way to the panel when she realized that Aricia wasn’t with her. She turned to see that the young woman was looking at several small paintings near the hearth and a small easel that had a half-finished painting on it. As Sophina opened her mouth to gain Aricia’s attention. Susanna spoke.

“Where is my father?” she asked.

Sophina turned her attention to the girl. “An army is approaching Spelthorne and this requires your father’s attention,” she said steadily. Then, she looked around the pretty chamber. “In fact, we must close your shutters for safety’s sake. If the castle is breached, we do not want to make it easy for the enemy to gain access to the keep.”

She moved away from the door again, indicating to Aricia to close the shutters nearest to her, which she did. As Sophina closed the second set of shutters with some effort, Susanna spoke.

“Do you mean that there is going to be a battle?” she asked.

Sophina settled the bar across the shutters. “I hope not,” she said. “But, to be safe, your father has asked that the women stay in the keep.”

Susanna finally looked up from her poppet, her dark eyes following Sophina. “He has gone to war before,” she said. “He has stayed away for years.”

“This is not going to war. This is a threat to Spelthorne.”

Susanna’s baleful gaze lingered on Sophina before returning to her poppet. It was clear that all was not forgiven from yesterday. “Am I still going to the nuns?”

Sophina brushed the dust off her hands from the shutters and moved in the direction of the door once more. “That is up to you,” she said. “If you promise to behave yourself, then I see no reason to send you. However, if you have no intention of being pleasant, then I am sure Cranborne is your next destination.”