Authors: Michael McGarrity
“Why not?”
“Because she was good for you and she was just what you needed. Everything I saw between the two of you was honest, loving, and caring. I'm betting you were faithful to each other right up to the end. It doesn't get much better than that.”
“Faithful?” Kevin snapped. “What about you and your married lover?”
Erma broke into a laugh. “Is that what you think? Lewis is single and has a very sensitive government job that requires him to travel a lot. Sometimes I wish he was married, then I could see him more frequently.”
“That's weird.”
Erma rose. “Thank you for the compliment. You have two choices, Kevin. You can turn Kim into a cold-hearted bitch, or you can treasure her memory as your first true love. What you decide may well determine what kind of man you'll become. Don't screw it up.”
She stepped over, kissed him on the cheek, and said, “Give my love to your parents.”
“I will.”
Erma left and for a long time Kevin sat silently considering her advice. He finally decided if he was going to be continually drawn to women with minds of their own, he'd best be prepared for the consequences.
Kevin prepared for his return to school pleased to no longer be a freshman and impatient to get back to living on his own. The summer had passed quickly; work with the ponies had kept him plenty busy. In some ways it had been a pleasure to step away from book learning and use his head and hands in the everyday ranch chores, helping his father with the challenges of turning frisky young horses into savvy cow ponies. He always learned something new working with his dad that was often far more satisfying than the large, somewhat boring classroom lectures he had to endure at college.
In the cool of the evenings he frequently joined his folks on the screened-in porch, where they talked mostly about their plans to expand the horse-breeding and training operation. His dad wanted to build a foaling barn to house mares with difficult pregnancies. Each baby they lost meant lost income, and if a brood mare died while foaling, the expense was considerable.
With profits being plowed back into the business, the gamble had yet to put them squarely in the black. However, they were no
longer dipping into their dwindling cash reserves to pay the bills. From the look of his dad's patched jeans and his mom's faded blouses, Kevin could see they weren't indulging in any extras or spending money on themselves. And while both seemed fit and healthy, they looked a bit more worn down come the end of the day. Still, that didn't diminish their optimism about the future, or the joy of what they were doing.
For Kevin it had been a good summer. Being home with his parents, visiting with Al and Brenda, and catching up with some of his old high school acquaintances was the tonic he needed to get over Kim Ward. He even took Betsy Reed to a couple of Saturday-night movies, bought Jeannie Hollister a Coke when he ran into her at the drugstore, and went to Dale's old girlfriend's wedding in T or C. Part of him felt detached from it all as if he were a stranger visiting his old hometown.
Before he left for Las Cruces, his dad walked him to his truck and pressed fifty dollars into his hand. He refused to take it back.
“Unexpected things come up,” he explained. “Besides, I know your ROTC stipend only covers the bare bones.”
“Erma feeds me a lot,” Kevin protested.
“You take it,” Matt demanded. “And as a favor to me, call your mother once in a while. Reverse the charges. She misses you.”
He turned to see his mom standing on the porch brushing a tear from her cheek and merrily waving at the same time. “I promise.”
On his apartment door was a note from Erma saying she'd gone out of town with Lewis on an overnight road trip to Santa Fe and he'd find a landscape plan on his kitchen table that she wanted to discuss with him upon her return. It was a master plan drawn in her hand for the grounds immediately surrounding the house and the driveway. Most of the surrounding acreage on the
property would remain untouched. It showed the exact location for every shrub, tree, bush, and planting bed, along with a list of the species or variety to be planted, mostly native. She wanted a great deal of rock work to be done, including sizable boulders, rock walls, and gravel pathways.
If she expected him to do it alone, it would likely mean working steadily during his free time over the course of the entire academic year. He didn't mind; it would give him a lot of satisfaction to see it come to fruition.
When she returned home they went over the plan together. It was to be his only handyman project for the year, and she would work with him when time allowed. Starting right away, all the rock, boulders, gravel, and plants would be delivered on an as-needed basis. When the time came, additional workers would be hired to help position the larger boulders.
“Do we have a deal?” Erma asked.
“You bet. It's the best project you've given me yet.”
Erma laughed. “You're just glad to be released from making appetizers and hors d'oeuvres for my parties. Speaking of which, there will be one on Saturday night and you must come.”
“I wouldn't miss it.”
The party was one of Erma's standard affairs, only this time it had the addition of a Mexican guitarist, Gabriel Morales, who played and sang Spanish ballads on the courtyard. Kevin met him before the party while he helped Erma with the appetizers and hors d'oeuvres anyway, and discovered he was a muralist from Mexico City who had been accepted into the university fine-arts graduate program. They chatted in Spanish, which pleased Gabriel greatly. He talked about his wife and baby girl, who waited for him at their apartment in the old Hispanic neighborhood close to downtown. He was surprised and delighted to be in a
place that reminded him of old Mexico, and to meet so many people who fluently spoke his native tongue.
He looked a little bit like the actor Fernando Lamas, with dark, intense eyes; a long, angular face; and a thin aristocratic nose above narrow lips. He had a ready smile, a strong baritone voice, and long fingers that flew over the guitar strings.
The minute Sue Ann Bussey arrived at the party, solo this time, she zoomed in on Gabriel like a heat-seeking missile, flashing her most brilliant smile, swishing by him as he roamed the courtyard taking requests for songs from the guests. Kevin's presence rated no more than a passing glance from her. He watched with amused interest as she tried to monopolize Gabriel's attention.
He charmingly deflected her. At the end of the party, when he packed up his guitar and left to go home to his wife and infant daughter, Sue Ann turned her spotlight on Kevin.
“Are you ever going to show me your apartment?” She pouted like a spoiled little Shirley Temple.
“It's such a mess, I'd be embarrassed for you to see it.”
Sue Ann shook her strawberry locks. “I wouldn't mind.”
Kevin studied her face. It was lovely, the smile magnetic, the look perfect for the camera, but it was empty of anything genuine. She could easily arouse him, but he found he really didn't like her. “No, I don't think so.”
Her smile vanished. “You're kidding.”
“No, I'm not.”
“Jesus, what an arrogant kid you are.” She snatched her clutch purse from the entry side table, said good night to Erma, and stormed out.
“I thought you'd sleep with her at least once,” Erma commented dryly.
“So did I,” Kevin said. “But there's nothing there. Why do you keep inviting her to your parties?”
“Entertainment value,” Erma replied. “But now that I've discovered Gabriel and his guitar, you may have seen the last of her.”
“That's okay by me.”
Erma stepped close and gave him a motherly kiss.
“What's that for?”
Her smile was filled with pride. “Being the man my dear friend Mary has always known you would be.”
“You aren't going to tell her about this, are you?”
“Goodness, no. Now go home before I ask you to help me clean up.”
Kevin reached for the half-empty drink glasses on the entry table. “You don't have to ask. I'll help anyway.”
***
A
fter classes started, he saw Kim several times from a distance on campus but didn't try to intercept her. According to her roommate, who was in his English literature class, she was still with Todd, on the rodeo team, and as free-spirited as ever.
He had little time for dating or socializing. He managed to meet up for coffee at the SUB with several girls who appealed to him, but nothing came of it. He wasn't sure if they simply weren't interested or he wasn't, but the absence of any spark made it clear trying to turn it into something more wouldn't work. He took a town girl to a football game and slept with her once and that was the end of that. It was a monstrous disappointment compared to lovemaking with Kim.
In his second-year Spanish class there was a girl who intrigued him. He didn't know why, because she seemed the exact opposite
of the type he liked. She sat alone, spoke little in class, and had a very shy air about her. She was tiny, dark-skinned with a small waist, had jet-black hair, obsidian eyes, and an oval face with high cheekbones.
He thought she was very good-looking but did everything possible to hide it. Her hair was always in a single braid that ran down her back, her clothing was drab and plain, she wore little or no makeup, and she hid her pretty face behind oversize reading glasses. She lived in the same dorm as Kim, because he'd seen her coming and going. During class introductions, she said she was from the Apache village of Mescalero. That was all he knew.
One day on a whim, he caught up with her outside after class. “You speak Spanish perfectly,” he said with a smile as he walked with her. “Why are you taking the class?”
She stopped and looked at him with serious eyes. “Because it's an easy A and I need it for my grade-point average.”
“That makes sense.”
She nodded in agreement and began to walk away.
He caught up with her again. “I'm Kevin Kerney.”
She paused again with the same serious look. “My name is Isabel Istee.”
“From Mescalero, right?”
“Yes, I am Chiricahua.” She eyed him critically. “You don't look like one of those hippie boys who wants to sleep with an Indian.”
Her comment threw him off. “I'm not.”
“Do you?”
“Do I what?”
“Want to sleep with me? I'm the only Indian girl living on campus, so it seems there's quite a competition going on about it.” She said it without rancor.
Flummoxed, Kevin put his hands up in surrender. “I don't
know anything about that. I'm sorry if I've given you the wrong impression.”
“Then why did you speak to me?”
“Is it forbidden?”
“No, it's just unusual. Most people leave me alone.”
“I won't trouble you again.”
“I don't mind, if you are honorable.”
“I like to think I am.”
“You study to be a soldier. I've seen you in your uniform.”
“Is that bad?”
Isabel shook her head. “No. I must go now. I have another class.”
He watched her walk away. He decided there was nothing shy about her at all. She moved with the grace of a woman, not with a bouncy, flouncy, college-girl walk. He figured Isabel Istee was not one to be taken lightly.
***
I
sabel Istee thought about Kevin Kerney as she walked into her biology class, not quite sure of what to make of him. He seemed genuinely surprised to know there was a “Who would be the first to score with the Indian chick?” contest on campus. Was that on the up-and-up or just a ploy on his part?
She was the first in her family and one of the first women in her tribe to ever go to college. She wasn't about to dishonor her family or tribe in her quest to become a registered nurse with a bachelor's degree. Ever since she was a little girl she'd dreamed of helping her people, especially the teenagers. Among her generation a high percentage suffered from alcoholism and drug abuse, and the rate of pregnancy of underage girls was astronomical.
She'd noticed Kevin Kerney in Spanish class and appreciated that he was one of the few Anglo students who didn't speak over another person, rudely interrupt them, or fail to listen. She found these traits admirable and unusual in a White Eyes.
His family was known to her through Jasper Daklugie, who'd worked for a time on the Kerney ranch before he went to war in Korea. He had only positive things to say about the family. And Kerney's ancestors were known to her through the stories passed down from Jasper's uncle, who in the long-ago days knew and respected the Kerneys as decent people. The rarity of such a positive attitude among her people toward any White Eyes made Isabel disposed to withhold judgment. But experience had taught her that prejudice ran deep and was often unrecognized by virtually all White Eyes, including most of the students she'd met and many of the faculty.
Isabel was both Christian and pagan. She spoke three languages fluently, including her native Apache tongue, had a public name and a birth name known to few others, and was a member of an ancient matriarchal culture where women were more than just equals. It would take a special White Eyes to earn her regard. She decided if he persisted in his interest, she might be agreeable to it, but somewhat wary.
She settled down in her favorite chair at the back of the classroom where she'd be undisturbed and opened her notebook just as the professor cleared his throat to begin.
***
W
ithout being pushy, Kevin persuaded Isabel to help him study for the midterm Spanish test, which would be to translate half a dozen English passages into Spanish. Conversationally he was
okay, but when it came to the complexities of grammar, especially with words with multiple meanings, he often stumbled.
They met at the library and she tutored him for two hours, patiently correcting and encouraging him. On the walk back to her dorm, he invited her to Erma's annual Halloween party as his guest.
“Professor Erma Fergurson?”
“Yes, she's my landlady.”
Isabel smiled in disbelief. She'd heard much about Professor Fergurson and had wanted to meet her. “She is your landlady?”
She rarely smiled, so Kevin took it as a good omen. “And my mother's best friend,” he added, hoping it might win him a few points.
“I will go,” she said as they stopped in front of the dorm. “Good night.”
Hoping for more of an explanation as to why she showed such an interest in Erma, Kevin hesitated, but she'd already turned away.
“It's a costume party,” he noted.
“I'll come as an Apache princess,” Isabel replied over her shoulder.
And she did. When Kevin picked her up the night of the party, she emerged into the dorm reception area wearing a blue-and-red-beaded soft white buckskin dress with long tassels and knee-high matching beaded moccasins. Her hair, pulled into a braided ponytail, ran down her back to her waist. Draped around her neck were strands of colorful beads. Her eyeglasses were gone, showing off her lovely eyes. Her entrance stopped all activity. Guys waiting to pick up their dates unabashedly stared. She approached Kevin, looked him up and down, and smiled.