The Law of Attraction (21 page)

“I know,” Ed agreed. “Are you going to come out at work too now?” Hope rose, even though now wasn’t the right time to ask Alec about what it might mean for their relationship.

“Yes.” Alec nodded, his jaw set with determination. He turned to Ed and his eyes were fierce. “No more hiding. No more lies. I’m hoping to be offered a partnership role very soon, and I’m going to tell them before I accept. I want to get everything out in the open at last.”

“Wow, Alec, that’s amazing. Congratulations.” A smile spread across Ed’s face. “You kept that quiet. When did you hear?”

“Only on Friday, and it’s not official. I hope I’m not jinxing it by mentioning it… but Katherine implied it’s very likely.”

“Are you sure now’s a good time to come out, though?” Ed’s stomach lurched. What if Alec’s brave decision jeopardised his promotion?

“There will never be a perfect time, but if they’re going to make the offer, they can’t change their minds and withdraw it because I’m gay. My orientation doesn’t affect my ability to do my job. The partners don’t need to know the details of my love life or that Belinda was never a real girlfriend. It’s not relevant. And I’m done with pretending. I want to be out.” Alec took Ed’s hands in his, and Ed’s heart did a somersault as he stared into Alec’s eyes. “I want to be free to have a real relationship… with you, Ed. If you’ll have me. Will you give me another chance?”

The raw hope and honesty in Alec’s eyes pierced Ed like a knife to the heart and emotion flooded through him. “Of course I will,” he managed around the lump in his throat. “God… come here.” Ed reached for Alec, curling his fingers around the nape of his neck as he pulled him close. He pressed his face into Alec’s neck and breathed in the scent of his skin. “I’m fucking crazy about you. Saying no to you in Edinburgh was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”

His words were muffled, but Alec must have heard, because he tightened his arms around Ed as he replied. “I’m fucking crazy about you, too.”

Ed turned his head, seeking Alec’s lips in a greedy, messy kiss that Alec returned until they finally pulled apart, breathless and grinning at each other like idiots.

Just at that moment, Ed’s mum called from downstairs. “Ed, dinner’s ready.”

Ed groaned in frustration. “God, really? What timing.”

Alec chuckled. “I’m starving, though. Come on. We can talk more later.” He stood and offered his hand to Ed.

“Talking wasn’t all I was thinking about,” Ed grumbled as Alec pulled him up.

Alec kissed him lightly on the lips before saying, “Talking is all we’ll be doing tonight. We have a lot to talk about, and I’m not fucking you in your mum’s house.”

Ed’s whole body flushed hot at the thought of it, even though he knew Alec was right. He wouldn’t be able to get in the mood with the twins in the next room and his mum across the hallway, anyhow. He raised an eyebrow. “There’s a B & B over the road. They might have rooms available.”

“If everything works out how I’m hoping it will,” Alec said, taking Ed’s hand again, “we’ll have plenty more nights for fucking. Now come on, we’re keeping your mum waiting.”

Grinning at Alec’s words and what they implied, Ed couldn’t wipe the smile off his face as they entered the kitchen. It was only when he noticed Gemma’s gaze drop to their joined hands and saw her eyebrows shoot up that Ed realised Alec still had hold of his hand.

“Gemma, this is Alec,” Ed said. “Alec, my other sister, Gemma.”

“Hi, Alec.” She dragged her gaze away from their hands and managed a typically awkward teenage smile before looking down at her phone again and hiding behind her hair.

“You said Alec wasn’t your boyfriend,” Alice’s voice piped up accusingly.

Ed blushed and scrambled for words, but his mum saved him.

“Alice, that’s enough. You’re such a nosey parker. Now, Alec, would you like a glass of wine? I have some red open, but there’s white in the fridge, or beer if you prefer?”

“Red would be lovely, thanks,” Alec said.

“Come and sit down.” She indicated two empty chairs. “And you sit next to him, Ed. Do you want wine too, love?”

“Yes, please.”

“Can I do anything to help?” Alec asked.

“No, everything’s ready. Just sit yourself down. Greg, can you start serving the lasagne while I pour the wine?”

By the time everyone had food on their plates, Ed had stopped feeling weird about having Alec there. In fact, the strangest thing was how utterly right it felt. Alec was charming—of course—and soon even Gemma was talking animatedly to him about some boy band she was longing to see in concert. Ed caught his mum’s eye. She glanced at Alec, and then she smiled at Ed. Ed’s cheeks warmed as he read the knowing look in her eye.

Yes. I’m in love with him
, he thought,
and it’s written all over my face
. For the first time since he’d known Alec, Ed believed this could end well. It was early days, and they had a lot to work out, but the knowledge that Alec wanted a relationship with him was a warm curl of contentment in his chest.

After the meal, and once the clearing up was done, the twins badgered everyone into playing Pictionary. Even Gemma joined in. They drew lots for the teams, and Alec ended up with both twins on the only team of three. Gemma and Greg were together and Ed was with his mum.

“You’re not very good at this,” Alice said, looking at Alec’s attempt to draw a bull. “You need to draw faster, like Gemma.”

Gemma had scribbled hers in about three seconds flat, and Greg had guessed it as soon as she added the ring to the nose. Alec had only got as far as drawing something vaguely cow-like.

“Sorry,” Alec said. “This is my first time. Maybe I’ll get better with practice.”

“I expect so,” Ava said kindly, taking the pencil out of his hand. “Right, it’s my turn to draw next.”

Alec did improve a little during the game, but not enough to challenge the experts. Gemma and Greg ended up thrashing the rest of them, but nobody minded because they spent so much time laughing over one another’s terrible drawings.

Much later, when the game was over and the girls were in bed, Ed and Alec sat in the living room with Greg and Ed’s mum, watching TV and finishing up the wine from earlier. Ed noticed Alec trying to fight back a yawn. The strained look he had worn when he arrived had gone, but he looked exhausted. He’d done a lot of driving on top of an emotionally traumatic day.

“You look knackered,” Ed said softly. “Want to head up to bed?”

“Yes.” The yawn won, and Alec covered his mouth as he gave in to it. “I’m shattered. Sorry to be so antisocial.”

“It’s fine,” Ed’s mum said. “Ed told me about the crazy hours you both work. It’s a miracle you can get out of bed at all at weekends. Go and catch up on some sleep.”

Ed stood. “Come on.”

“Goodnight.” Alec smiled at Ed’s mum and then at Greg. “And thank you again for making me feel so welcome. It means a lot.”

“Anytime,” Greg said. “It’s no trouble.”

Ed’s mum agreed.

“Night,” Ed said with a wave of his hand.

“Sleep well,” his mum called after them as they left the room.

Ed felt weird leading Alec up to bed in his family home. He’d never had a boyfriend stay there before. Well… not since the mates he’d occasionally fooled around with when he was at school, and then his mum and Greg hadn’t really known they were boyfriends—or if they did, they’d turned a blind eye. This felt very different.

Ed let Alec use the family bathroom first, and then went to take his turn. When he came back, Alec was down to boxers, a T-shirt, and socks and was just getting into bed.

Ed stripped down too, keeping on his T-shirt and his underwear. “Mind if I join you? It’s a bit of a squash, but I thought you could use a hug.”

Honestly, Ed could use a hug too. He felt nervous again, uncertain about this tenuous new arrangement between them. He needed the reassurance of Alec’s arms around him, the warmth of his body.

Alec smiled and lifted the covers up so that Ed could slide in beside him.

“Is this okay?” Ed asked, fitting himself against Alec’s side and putting an arm across his chest.

“It’s perfect.” Alec’s voice was a deep rumble in Ed’s ear, and the thud of his heart was comforting and real. The old, well-washed fabric of Ed’s Harry Potter duvet cover was soft against the bare skin of Ed’s legs, and the warmth from Alec’s body was already seeping into his own.

Ed enjoyed it for a moment while plucking up the courage to speak. “I guess we need to talk.” He drew back a little so he could see Alec’s face.

“I guess we do,” Alec replied with a smile.

“So, what you said earlier….” Ed was almost afraid to believe it was true. “You really meant it? You want a relationship—and not a secret one?”

“I mean it. I’m going to come out at work, and I’d like people to know we’re an item, if you’re happy with that. You’re likely to be joining a new department next week, so we won’t be working closely together anymore, which is probably for the best. But that means there’s no reason we can’t be open about our relationship. Workplace relationships are hardly unusual.”

“How open are we talking? I mean… are we putting an announcement in the
Times
or what?”

Alec laughed. “There’ll be no need for that. I’m going to explain the situation to the partners when I meet them next week. Not because I anticipate it being a problem, but just in the interests of moving forward honestly. Then once that’s done, I’ll tell the rest of my team. Word will get round quickly after that.”

“God.” Ed cringed a little at the thought of being the subject of office gossip. “I hope people won’t think I’m a star fucker. The lowly minion and the high-flying partner….”

“Don’t speak too soon,” Alec said. “I haven’t got the job yet. But partner or not, they can think what they like. You’re a good lawyer, Ed. Your work speaks for itself. And we’ll only be a scandal for a week or so. Then something else will happen and we’ll be old news.” Alec shifted and the hairs on his thighs brushed against Ed’s where their legs were tangled together. “So, is it okay with you if I tell people about us?”

The way he said
us
made Ed’s insides melt into warm syrup. “Absolutely.” He smiled. “It’s completely, 100 percent fine.”

Alec kissed him, and Ed kissed him back. A sweet, slow brush of lips, filled with unspoken hopes and promises. When they separated, Ed took Alec’s hand and held it between them, stroking Alec’s palm with his thumb. “What made you decide to come out now? I mean….” He trailed off and looked at their joined hands. “I have to ask. I’m worried you’re only doing it for me, that I forced you into it somehow, and if that’s true, then I’m sorry. What if I’m not worth it?”

“Ed,” Alec said softly. “Ed, look at me.” Ed raised his gaze and was stunned by the burning intensity in Alec’s gaze. “I’m not going to lie to you. If I hadn’t met you, I probably wouldn’t be coming out now.” Ed flinched. “But—and this is a crucial but—I’m not coming out
for
you. You’re a factor, of course, I can’t deny it, because I don’t want to lose you through my cowardice. By coming out now, I have a chance at the kind of happiness I never imagined for myself before I met you.” Alec’s eyes were shining and his voice had gone a little hoarse. “I love you, Ed. I’m coming out for me, so I can be with you—for real. Boyfriends… partners… whatever you want to call it. No more risky office sex and stolen moments. I want the whole package.”

Ed’s eyes prickled. “I love you too,” he managed on a choked breath. “God. I can’t believe this is actually happening.” He kissed Alec again, throwing a leg over him to keep him close in the narrow bed. The duvet slipped and Ed pulled it back up to cover them without breaking the kiss. Then amusement bubbled up inside, fed by the elation of the moment. He pulled away to let it out, laughing breathlessly as Alec frowned in confusion.

“Sorry,” Ed gasped. “It just struck me as funny. This is hands down the most romantic experience of my life to date… but the setting leaves a lot to be desired. I can’t believe I’m finally confessing my feelings to the man of my dreams under a Harry Potter duvet cover.”

Alec snorted and his lips twitched, and then they both cracked up laughing, trying to stifle the sound so they wouldn’t disturb the rest of Ed’s family, who were probably asleep by now.

When they got their laughter under control, Ed was weak and his stomach hurt from it. They lay in silence then, Ed with his head on Alec’s shoulder and his leg still thrown across Alec’s thighs.

Alec yawned.

“Are you ready to sleep?” Ed asked.

“Yes. I can hardly keep my eyes open,” Alec admitted.

“Want me to go and sleep in the other bed? There’s barely room for two in here.”

“No.”

Ed smiled at the certainty in Alec’s voice. “Okay. Well, let me turn the lamp off, and we can rearrange ourselves so nobody ends up with a dead arm.”

Once the lights were off, they managed to get comfortable, with Alec spooned up behind Ed and his arm draped over him.

“Mmmm.” Ed sighed sleepily. “This reminds me of the first time we slept together. I woke up in the middle of the night, and we were in exactly this position.” He wriggled his arse back against Alec.

Alec groaned. “Don’t start that. I’m too tired, plus I told you, I’m not fucking you in your parents’ house.”

“Spoilsport.” Ed took Alec’s hand and held it tight against his chest.

“Goodnight, Ed,” Alec whispered.

“Night.”

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Alec woke to the feeling of a warm body in his arms and the tickle of Ed’s hair in his nostrils. He opened his eyes and saw daylight creeping around the edge of the curtains. The events of the day before trooped into his consciousness, and he ran through them until he remembered exactly where he was and why he was here.

He smiled. A sense of freedom and elation swept through him, so powerful that it made him want to shout or sing. But instead he satisfied himself with hugging Ed closer and dropping a kiss onto the back of his head, letting the happiness settle, deep and warm in the marrow of his bones.