The No Cry Nap Solution (10 page)

your heartbeat, and moving with the rhythm of your body

motions. There is a precious short time when this is the most

helpful way to get your baby to sleep.”

—Jean Kunhardt, M.A., author of A Mother’s Circle:

An Intimate Dialogue on Becoming a Mother

for sleep by wrapping them securely in a receiving blanket or spe-

cialty swaddling blanket.

Not all babies want or need to be swaddled, so if your baby

sleeps fi ne without this, don’t feel you must try this idea. However,

parents who have babies who are colicky, fussy, or sensitive sleep-

ers may fi nd swaddling to be a lifesaver. You can learn more about

swaddling—when to, how to, and weaning—on page 192.

Provide Your Baby with

Rhythmic Movement

In the womb your baby was jostled and rocked all day long. The

fl uid sway of movement was a soothing sleep inducer. Because of

this experience, many newborns fi nd lying on a still surface the

least comfortable way to sleep. Over the fi rst few months of life,

most babies will adjust to a motionless sleeping surface, but some

need a bit more time and help to make the transition.

The most obvious place for your baby to fi nd this womblike

feeling is in your arms or a baby sling or carrier, which can be a

newborn’s ideal happy sleep place. As long as you are comfortable

Nap Tips for Newborns
51

Father-Speak

“Our baby napped exclusively in her swing for months. I

work at home, and I kept the swing next to my desk. It was

the only way I could get Anna to sleep for more than twenty

minutes. Eventually she grew too big for the swing and

started sleeping in her crib in my offi ce. If she woke mid-nap,

I would jostle the crib, and she would return to sleep. Now

the crib is in her room (with a radio set to a talk station), and

she takes a two-hour nap. Honestly though, the swing was

worth its weight in gold for me when she was an infant.”

—Hector, father of eleven-month-old Anna

and willing, an in-arms nap is pure joy to your baby. I strongly

recommend that you balance these in-arms naps, at least half the

time, with out-of-arms naps. A large number of babies who spend

their early weeks of life in arms are unwilling to give this up for a

fl at, hard bed. (Smart babies!)

There are a wide variety of other options for creating move-

ment for your newborn’s naps. Baby swings, cradles, baby ham-

mocks, vibrating seats, and strollers all will provide the perfect

type of movement for naptime. Experiment with which ones

appeal most to you and your baby. To learn more about movement

sleep choices and get information about when and how to wean

from movement, see the solutions on page 166.

Consider Offering Your Baby a Pacifi er

for Sleep

Once breastfeeding is established, it is fi ne to offer your baby a

pacifi er to help him fall asleep. There is no evidence that using a

pacifi er creates any health or developmental problems for young

52 Newborn Babies

Professional-Speak

“If used sensibly and for a baby who has intense sucking

needs—in addition to, not as a substitute for, human nurtur-

ing—pacifi ers are an acceptable aid.”

—William Sears, M.D., author of The Baby Book

babies. On the contrary, new studies show that pacifi er use may

actually reduce the risk of SIDS, although it is unclear why the

connection exists. At this time, medical organizations no longer

discourage the use of pacifi ers for babies up to one year of age, so

if your baby benefi ts from having a pacifi er for sleep, you can now

rest assured that it is fi ne to use one.

Scientists and breastfeeding groups feel that more research

needs to be done before a blanket recommendation of pacifi er use

can be made since it might interfere with the quantity or length

of breastfeeding, so watch the news and talk this over with your

health care professional.

Balance Co-Sleeping with

Independent Sleeping

If you co-sleep with your newborn at night, consider letting your

newborn nap in his own cradle or crib. Since it will be unlikely

that you’ll want to take a nap every time your baby naps or go to

bed at night as early as your baby should, it will be very helpful if

he is comfortable sleeping on his own.

Many co-sleeping babies adjust to having a different sleep

place for naps versus nighttime sleep. Often a motion nap is a

good solution for a baby who prefers to sleep with company, since

the motion provides some of the sensory stimulation your baby

receives from sleeping with you.

Nap Tips for Newborns
53

The additional benefi t to having your co-sleeping baby sleep

in a cradle or crib at naptime is that when then time comes to

wean him from your bed at night, he will already be accustomed

to sleeping alone, which should make the transition easier.

Provide a Cozy Cradle

Many newborns feel overwhelmed in a large crib. Your baby may

fi nd that a smaller cradle, bassinet, or baby hammock is more to

her liking. There are many options for newborn beds, and it can

be useful to shop around. There are cradles made especially for

use beside an adult bed, which is helpful for ease of night feeding

and for reaching over to settle your baby. A cradle that rocks or

sways is a good option since this often can help your new baby

sleep better.

Create a Nest

Because newborns spent nine months free-fl oating while curled

in the fetal position, many are uncomfortable lying fl at on their

backs on a fi rm mattress. However, back sleeping on a fi rm mat-

tress is the most important protection against SIDS. If your new-

born naps well only in a sling or in your arms, this aversion to fl at,

stiff positioning may be part of the issue.

An idea that helps many newborn babies take longer naps is

to place them to sleep in an infant seat, swing, or stroller. Safety

dictates that you keep your baby within eyesight if using this sug-

gestion. Watch to be sure your baby doesn’t slump over with his

head down, as this can lead to breathing problems. Help keep your

baby’s head up by using car-seat padding created for this purpose.

As a safe option for your newborn’s nest, check into a baby

hammock. These gently embrace your baby and allow a similar

free-fl oating, 3-D type of movement as felt in the womb. Ham-

54 Newborn Babies

Father-Speak

“Lara was born early and was the tiniest baby ever. I helped

her fall asleep for her naps by bouncing her on an exercise

ball. It was cute when she was a burrito-wrapped, fi ve-

pound baby, but she eventually wouldn’t go down for her

nap any other way! We fi nally purchased a baby hammock

and found that she’ll willingly nap there—if I give it a bit of a

bounce until she falls asleep.”

—Ryan, father of fi ve-month-old Lara

mocks have a slight angle, raising the head of the bed, and can be

rocked either by the baby’s movement or with your gentle nudge.

Hammocks are especially soothing for a baby with refl ux, colic, or

extreme fussiness. They can be wonderful for a baby who resists

back sleeping and helpful for preemies or babies with special needs.

There are a variety of styles available, so shop around.

A potential drawback to this idea is that your baby may get

used to sleeping in his nest and resist future attempts to have him

sleep in his bed, but you’ll have many months of nice, long naps

before you’ll have to address this possible issue. Once your baby

has passed the newborn stage, you can begin to intersperse these

“nest” naps with sleeping on a fl at crib surface to help make the

transition.

Give Your Baby Opportunities to

Fall Asleep Unaided

Newborns are incredibly soft and sweet. It’s easy to keep such a

precious package in your arms or in a sling, even after they have

fallen asleep. The hitch here is that your baby will easily become

accustomed to being held as she falls asleep. She’ll soon be
unable

Nap Tips for Newborns
55

to fall asleep on her own. She’ll cry to protest the minute you

place her in bed, as if to say, “Why am I here? Pick me up please

so that I can sleep!”

You can avoid creating this almost inevitable scenario by plac-

ing your baby in her crib, cradle, hammock, or cradle-swing when

she is comfortable and drowsy but not entirely asleep. It’s perfectly

fi ne to pat or rub her leg, head, or tummy as she drifts off. Just

gradually make your touch slower and softer until your hand is

lying still on her. Then slowly remove your touch.

There is no risk in
sometimes
holding your sleeping baby. I would

never advise you to miss out on this unique and beautiful experi-

ence. But balance this with plenty of times when you put your

baby in his bed when he is drowsy and relaxed but not asleep.

Mother-Speak

“I think one of the most helpful ideas was to put him down

when he was tired but awake—he surprised me by allowing

it so often!”

—Judith, mother of three-month-old Harry

Be Thoughtful About Creating Patterns

While newborn babies don’t have “habits,” they don’t stay new-

borns for long. Before you know it, your newborn becomes a baby

who is accustomed to a specifi c routine. Babies get used to a cer-

tain pattern that becomes a very strong sleep cue, and then they

are reluctant to accept change.

For example, if you rock your baby in the rocking chair before

every nap, then that is the pattern that your baby comes to expect

before naps. It becomes a very comfortable—and very strong—sleep

cue. So, be thoughtful as you set up your baby’s naptime routines.

56 Newborn Babies

Be Aware of Your Baby’s “Suck-to-Sleep”

Association

If you are breastfeeding your newborn, it’s likely that she’ll easily

fall asleep during nursing, since over 80 percent of newborn nurs-

lings do fall asleep breastfeeding. It’s nearly impossible to prevent

your baby from becoming drowsy as she nurses—it’s a biological

benefi t of breastfeeding. However, there is something you can do

to prevent creating a fi rmly ingrained habit of sucking to sleep

that is very hard to change.

Here’s the golden ticket: At least half the time, remove your baby

from your breast when she is done feeding but before she begins

the pacifi ying sucking that is nonnutritive but sleep- inducing.

Before your baby is completely asleep, remove her from the breast

and transfer her to bed to fi nish falling asleep there. You will likely

need to pat, jiggle, or shush her to help her fall asleep, but having

Johari, four months old

Nap Tips for Newborns
57

her do this without the nipple in her mouth will show her that she

can, indeed, fall asleep without this. The value of this idea is most

clear among breastfeeding mothers who must nurse their
toddlers

fully to sleep for every nap and bedtime—so to avoid that scenario,

start this idea today. (To modify an existing “suck-to-sleep” associa-

tion, go to page 154.)

Don’t Smoke Before Your Baby’s Naptime

If you are a smoker, avoid lighting up in the hour before your baby’s

nap—especially if you breastfeed. According to Julie A. Mennella,

a psychobiologist who completed an extensive study of breastfeed-

ing mothers who smoke, “Infants spent less time sleeping overall

and woke up from naps sooner when their mothers smoked prior

to breastfeeding.” Mennella’s research demonstrated that nicotine

levels peak in breast milk thirty to sixty minutes after smoking

and are gone after three hours, so the more time you can place

between smoking and your baby’s prenap feeding, the better your

baby will sleep.

Tune Out Other People’s Bad Advice

Many people have very strong opinions about babies and sleep—

even people who don’t
have
babies have opinions! Much of this

opinion and advice is inaccurate, misguided, or downright danger-

ous. Inoculate yourself against bad advice. Do your own research