The Ocean (17 page)

“This is fun,” he said, nervously sarcastic.

“This is amazing.” I ignored his tone, and rested my head against his chest.

“Yeah,” he sighed. “This is amazing.” After a few songs, a cheerleader came and tapped his shoulder. It was time for him to go backstage to be announced for the homecoming court. He kissed my cheek and fol owed the girl.

I wandered back to our table. I sat down and was talking to Abby when suddenly I felt something cold and wet slide down my back. I gasped and turned to see Lila, a cheerleader, standing behind me holding a cup with one hand and covering her mouth with the other.

“I’m sorry!” she gasped. I almost believed her. Almost. Abby was right by my side, taking my hand and leading me to the bathroom. We didn’t say anything until we were in there. I turned and saw my reflection in the mirror; a bright red line traced down the middle of my back where my dress line began and ending just above my butt. I gasped and could feel a tear stinging my eye.

“Let me try to fix this.” Abby went to get paper towels. There weren’t any there. “I’l go get in the janitor’s closet. They must have extras in there. Be right back.” She left, and I turned, trying to see my back in the mirror. Suddenly the last stal opened, and Jil ian came out smiling at me. I held her eye contact in the mirror for long moment before I gazed back at my back.

“Ah, that’s too bad,” she said sarcastical y. “Who was the klutz who did that? Such a pretty dress.” She washed her hands, even though I hadn’t heard the toilet flush. “Sometimes bad things happen to good people.” She pul ed a paper towel from the dispenser out of her purse. I just looked at her in the mirror. She took out a lipstick and began slowly to apply it to her upper lip. “You know, Travis and I have been together for a long time.

And sometimes we’re on again off again, but we always end up together. I just get him like no one else.” She was only half way done with one lip when she continued, “I know he’s real y mad at me right now, but he loves me. He told me al the time, every day actual y, from the time we started dating. Has he told you he loves you yet?” She looked at me innocently as she began applying the lipstick to her lower lip.

“Not yet, but we haven’t been dating that long.” I looked down at the sink.

“Wel , did you ever think that there might be a reason for that?” She rol ed her lips blending the color. “I just don’t want you to get hurt. I’ve heard rumors about your mom dying. I’m just looking out for you; I think you are clinging to something that’s real y not there.” She was sugary sweet. It was stomach turning how sweet she was being now.

“I appreciate your opinion, but this is between Travis and me, so if it doesn’t work out, I’m sure he has your number.” I held her gaze and kept my voice as level as I could.

She smirked and closed her purse with a snap. She turned and left. I stood there for a few moments before Abby made it back in a huff.

“Someone locked me in the janitor closet. Can you believe that bul ?” She sat the stack of paper towels on the counter. “Lila and Stacia let me out.” She took a few towels and wet them. She began to tap at the wet spot. She rubbed gently, and the color began to fade. It didn’t completely go away, but it was a soft pink by the time she was done.

“We can pul your hair down. It might cover it,” she suggested.

“Yeah, but it would look crazy around my face.” I contemplated her idea as I turned and surveyed my back again. I final y decided, “It’s done. I don’t want it to ruin the rest of the night.” She tilted her head into mine as she hugged my shoulders.

“You’re so brave. I would be in tears right now.” I didn’t have the courage to tel her about the conversation I’d just had with Jil ian. I drew from her strength even though she didn’t know she gave it to me.

“Are we ready?” I asked, and she smiled grandly. We rejoined the crowd as they were announcing the students of the homecoming court. Each couple filed in, did a twirl as if they were going to dance, and then went to the stage. Travis found my face again and smiled at me; it was a little off though. Then they announced the homecoming queen, “Macey Graham.” She stepped forward and took her crown. Homecoming king was “Darnel Abernathy.” Chiz stepped forward beaming to take his crown with his two black eyes and crooked nose. I turned to Abby and mouthed “Darnel Abernathy?” She smiled widely and nodded yes. No wonder he went by Chiz. They stepped to the middle of the dance floor, and al began their ritual dance. They al actual y looked like they were enjoying it. Alex and Gloria smiled and giggled. Mason looked pleasant, but kept looking at Abby longingly. Travis was engulfed in conversation with Jil ian, his eyes soft, and a smile creeping into the corners of his mouth. He nodded yes and leaned down to her. She then brushed her lips to his, draping her arms around his neck. I gasped and began backing up, pressing against the bodies that surrounded me. They stood there for what felt like an eternity. I turned, pushing my way through the crowd. Abby reached for me, but I pul ed out of her grasp. I heard a female say, “She should have known they would get back together. They belong together.” I got out of the crowd and ran. I slammed into the doors, plowing them open until I was out. I paused on the school’s front stoop long enough to catch my breath, and then I ran. I’ve never run in heels before, but it didn’t matter and I didn’t fal . I ran until the school was out of sight. Then I walked. I walked several blocks blindly until I found myself at a park in the center of a neighborhood I didn’t know. I walked to a swing and sat. I didn’t know how long sat there alone, but I turned when I heard footsteps behind me.

Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda

Travis

Mr. Dailey announced the homecoming court. As we came in to make the grand entrance that had been rehearsed for two periods on Friday, Jil ian whispered to me, “This can be painless or difficult; it’s up to you.” I suddenly felt very anxious, but smiled to Gia as I stood on the stage. I didn’t want her to be nervous. Mr. Dailey announced Chiz and Macey as the homecoming king and queen. Then came the part I was dreading, dancing with Jil ian. We descended the stairs. We took our position.

“Your date is real y pretty this evening.” She looked sincere.

“Thanks, I think she is most days,” I said.

“You two real y do make a cute couple. I didn’t see it before last night, but she needs you to take care of her. I get it.”

“Are you on some kind of special medicine?” A smile crept into the corners of my mouth, and I leaned toward her adding, “It would mean a lot to me if you realized how serious I am about her.” She smiled and breathed, “I do.” And that was when she kissed me, wrapping her arms around my neck and holding me there. After what felt like an eternity but was probably more like seconds of struggling against her, I pul ed her off me. I turned to where Gia had stood, but she was gone. I was stil clutching Jil ian’s hands at the wrists hard.

“You’re hurting me,” she whined. I threw her arms to her side.

“Not nearly enough,” I said, as I caught sight of Gia running for the back door, a red streak on the back of her beautiful dress that flowed behind her almost in slow motion. I tried to catch her but was pressed in the crowd. By the time I made it through to the front door of school, she was gone. Alex was behind me.

“Smooth, Nichols,” he said.

“She just kissed me; I had no idea.” I hit my fist against the brick.

“If you’ve broken her heart…,” he began but stopped himself.

“I’l make this right,” I said, as I took off running; I had an idea of where she might have gone.

I ran until I reached the pier. I walked to the edge that faced the shore line. She was nowhere in sight, but it was dark so I took off my shoes and socks and began to walk the beach. I walked until I was past most of the hotels. I turned and went back toward the pier. She was nowhere in sight. I found a bench and sat there. I needed to col ect my thoughts. I wondered how last night we’d had so much fun and tonight it was ruined. Her dress was ruined; our relationship ruined. I walked until I found myself sitting on her stoop, waiting for her. I sat there for what felt like hours. The porch light came on. Minutes later Oliver opened the door and came out. I turned to look at him. He came and sat on the other side of the stairs. He looked up at the sky for a long moment.

“Tonight didn’t go as you planned?” he asked matter-of-factly.

“What was your first clue?” I asked, not looking up from my feet.

“Wel , you’re here, and my daughter is not.” He misses nothing, I thought sarcastical y.

“Something happened at the dance that upset her. I couldn’t get to her, and she took off. Now I’m just waiting for her to cool down so we can talk.” I didn’t know why I was explaining myself to him.

“Did you check the beach? She used to go there a lot as a little girl. I guess she always felt safe there. I used to go there sometimes and just watch her stare off into the gulf. She was so young to have such a serious face, ful of serious thoughts. I didn’t make their childhood easy. Sometimes the drink can turn you into someone you don’t know. Or,” he paused and looked at me, commanding my attention. I looked up at him. “It brings out the darkest person you have inside you.” Then, shrugging, he said, “Not that there’s any excuse for the mistakes we make in our lives. If we spend our time blaming other people, we are just as delusional as we were when we justified our decisions to do those things.” His expression went soft. “Why don’t you go home? I’l tel her you were here, and she can cal you when she returns. That one, she spends a lot of her time thinking and makes her decisions on her own. You can’t change her mind. In some ways, she’s just like her mother when she was younger, before.” He trailed off and looked up to the sky again. He stood and went back to the door before turning again to say. “Real y, Travis, just go home.” I stood and slowly began my walk home. I didn’t even know what I would say when I did see her.

What Becomes of the Broken-hearted?

Gianna

“You look like you’ve lost your best friend.” I turned to see Chiz approaching.

“It feels worse than that.” I continued slowly to swing.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” He leaned against the pole, his hands in his pocket, his crown cocked at an angle on his head.

“How long are you going to wear that thing?” I tilted my head, appraising how goofy he looked.

“I’m the king, so as long as I want.” He moved behind me and began to swing me, pushing me on my stil damp back. “A few of us were worried about you. We split up to look for you. I’m glad I found you.”

“Worse. Dance. Ever.” I sighed.

“Yeah, I saw Travis and Jil kiss. That’s harsh.” It was one thing to have seen it; it was another to have Chiz confirm it. He continued, “I mean they probably just got caught up in the moment. You know, nostalgia.” He held me at my waist longer than he should have to push me, but he pushed me again gently.

“Too bad about your dress, too. You were smokin’ tonight, wel , stil are.” I was glad I didn’t have to look in his eyes. “Are you going to let him dump you like this?”

“Huh?” It was like he was speaking another language. I didn’t understand the question.

“I mean, obviously they are getting back together. He wouldn’t have kissed her if he wasn’t. Travis’ most annoying quality is that he’s a stand-up guy.

I just can’t believe he dumped you like this. He’s a jerk if you ask me.” He held onto me again. I turned to look at him. The hurt had to be clear in my eyes.

“Sorry, were you thinking he’d stil want to date you after that?” He looked apologetic. I turned back around.

“I was thinking it was a mistake, and we’d work things out.” I leaned my head against the cool chain.

“I don’t know if you want to stay in that drama. Him with you, wishing he was with her. You deserve so much better.” Chiz came around and stood in front of me, taking my hands and pul ing me to stand.

“I could protect you from him. Al you have to do is ask.” He didn’t let go of my hands.

“What are you gonna do, rough him up? Give him an offer he can’t refuse?” I used my best New York accent. He chuckled.

“Funny girl. No, I’l just tel him to leave you alone. But only if you want me to; I just think you shouldn’t talk to him for a while.” Then he pul ed me into a bear hug. I had trouble breathing; he held me too tight. I pul ed away as far as he’d let me to look up at him. He had this weird look in his eyes. Then his eyes closed as he leaned toward me. My eyes grew large as I realized he was going to try to kiss me. He held me too tightly for me to just step away. My only option came to me at the last second. As his lips were about to brush mine, I turned; giving him my cheek, my signature move. He planted it and then smiled at me, releasing me.

“I’l give you a ride home, if that’s OK.” I nodded, and he led me to his monster SUV.

Travis cal ed me every half hour from eight o’clock in the morning al day Sunday.

I didn’t take his cal s, so he texted me.

I really need to talk to you.

Please let me explain.

I didn’t know that she would do something like that; I would have never let her if I did.

And final y,

I’m sorry if I’ve hurt you.

I kept hearing Chiz’s voice saying, “Him with you, wishing he was with her.” I kept waiting for the tears to come, but they didn’t. I stayed in my room al day listening to loud rock music. It was so loud that Oliver came to my door twice tel ing me to turn it down.

Alex came to my room mid-afternoon as I sat in the middle of my bed leaning against the wal staring at my beautiful painting. He sat down beside me and looked at it, too, for a while not saying anything. Final y, he turned the music down and said, “You can’t hold him responsible for something that happened to him, something that he had no control over. He real y likes you. He doesn’t play games; you know that. He would never hurt you.” When I didn’t respond, he simply said, “Oliver’s gril ing steaks. If you’re hungry they should be ready soon.” I sat there staring at the painting. I didn’t know how to gauge my emotions. I was hurt. I was humiliated. I felt betrayed even though it made sense that it wasn’t his fault, but I kept thinking that there might have been a part of him, however large or smal it was, that wanted to be with her. He promised me that I had nothing to worry about, but kissing Jil ian or being kissed by Jil ian stil hurt me. My dress was ruined. My evening was ruined. My relationship, the one thing that had made this move seem as if it had a purpose, was ruined. I looked over to the pictures Oliver had already had printed up from the evening before. They had been waiting for me there on my dresser after Chiz dropped me off, being annoyingly charming by walking me to the door and introducing himself to Oliver.