The Odds of Lightning (17 page)

“Okay, Lu! It's just me!” Nathaniel shouted over the din. He carried her as if she weighed no more than a feather, and was sprinting through the crowd, knocking people over with just a touch. “We're getting out of here!”

He pushed his way through the mess of people.

“Nathaniel!” Lu shouted down at him. “Are you actually getting
stronger
?”

“Yes!” he yelled, excited. “It's like I'm accelerating—each thing I do makes me more super! Like a video game character collecting power-ups!”

“You're such a nerd!” Will yelled from behind them, where he and Tiny were running to catch up.

“Like you don't know what that means!” Nathaniel shot back.

Lu helped them through the crowd by wildly swinging her weaponlike heels every time someone crazy-looking got too close. They made it to the sidewalk, and barreled through the sliding electronic doors of a nearby store. The doors closed behind them. Lu's ears rang in the sudden quiet.

The white, white light, buzzing and fluorescent, was jarring after the darkness outside. Aisles stretched out uniformly before them in perfect endless rows.

“Where are we?” Lu asked.

“Kmart,” said Tiny. “I think.”

“That was wild,” Nathaniel said, looking out the glass doors. “People are taking this Stormpocalypse thing really literally.”

“Much. Too. Literally.” Lu slid down the wall, gasping. She couldn't feel the blood pumping through her veins. She couldn't feel how hard her own heart was beating. But she knew she could have died back there, and she had too much unfinished business to do to die tonight.

“Is everyone okay?” said Tiny. Will—still Owen—was leaning with both hands against a checkout counter, wheezing.

“Can. We. Please. Stop. All. This. Running? Owen is not in good shape.” He coughed. “I think he's a smoker.”

Lu remembered how kissing him always tasted like cigarettes and cheap whiskey. Or cigarettes and beer. Or cigarettes and Oreos, that one time.

“He is,” she said.

Two bored and tired-looking cashiers were standing there, shooting suspicious glances their way.

“We're closing in ten,” one of them said, nodding to a sign near the door.

STORM HOURS

OPEN ‘TIL MIDNITE

GET YOUR EMERGENCY SUPPLIES
HERE!!!

2-FOR-1 BATTERIES

***STORM SPECIAL!!!***

“We'll just be a second,” Nathaniel said, flashing them a
can you believe this weather?
smile and shrug that looked psychotic, given the circumstances. “Whew, it's crazy out there!” He motioned for Tiny, Will, and Lu to follow him away from the checkout area. Kmart was totally deserted. They were the only freaks who were out for some light shopping during Superstorm Eileen. Everyone else had prepared hours ago—or was beyond saving.

Lu hoped the four of them didn't fall into that latter category.

Then she heard a familiar zap.

Once again they found themselves suspended in darkness.

“The power's out,” Nathaniel said. Then, “The doors are powered by electricity. We're trapped in here until it comes back on.”

“Not again,” Lu groaned. “Can't you, like, break down the door or something?”

“The horde is still out there,” Nathaniel said, peering through the glass. “I don't want to draw attention to ourselves.” He paused. “Or spook them.”

“They're not zombies,” Lu muttered. She grabbed Tiny's hand for reassurance. She actually had to grab it twice because it was so hard to see. “Hey, Tine,” Lu said. “I can hardly see you in the dark.”

“I know,” said Tiny. “It's because—”

“Shit!” Lu interrupted, looking at her arm. “I'm bleeding. I didn't even know I got cut back there!” Lu shivered. It was weird not to feel pain. That crazy lady with the knife had sliced her arm, and she hadn't even felt it. “Come on. As long as we're stuck in here, let's go find some Band-Aids. I don't want to bleed on my favorite shirt.” She paused. “What were you saying?”

“Nothing,” said Tiny. “Never mind.”

“Oookay,” said Lu. She hated to admit it, but she was relieved. There had been more than enough talking about feelings already tonight.

“We'll stay here and look for a way out,” Nathaniel called after them.

Faint light filtered in through the glass sliding doors, growing dimmer and dimmer the farther they ventured into the store. In the first aid section, Lu squinted in the dark as she tried to make out the different kinds of Band-Aids.

“Oooh, look how awesome these are!” Lu said with delight. “Disney Princess Band-Aids! If I were a Disney character, I think I'd be a cross between Jasmine and Iago the parrot.” Tiny snorted with laughter. Lu grinned. “Right?”

“So right. Who am I?”

“Oh, Tiny. You're like a cross between Ariel and Mrs. Potts.”

“Mrs. Potts?”

“Don't look so pissed. That's a good thing. Mrs. Potts is a caretaker.”

“Mrs. Potts is a teapot.”

“Tea is very nourishing.”

There was a pause. “You think I'm a caretaker?” Tiny said quietly.

“Of course,” said Lu. “You take care of me.”

Tiny smiled. Lu actually felt nice for the first time all night. It was rare that she said something that made someone else feel good.

“Yeah,” she continued. “You're always concerned about my feelings and not wanting me to make mistakes or take risks or do anything that we don't know the outcome to.” Tiny's smile faded, but Lu wasn't sure why.

Was it the darkness playing tricks on her, or was Tiny
especially
hard to see? She looked like a Polaroid developing in reverse.

She wanted to ask Tiny if she was okay, but she hadn't in so long that it felt weird to do it now. So she kept quiet and just refocused her attention on the Band-Aids.

“Lu,” Tiny said. “Are you worried? I mean, about all this?”

Lu picked up a box of Band-Aids. “Hm. I don't know. Kind of. Hey, it gets us out of studying!”

“But . . . you could be in real trouble. We all could.”

“Tiny,” Lu said to her. “Lightning can strike you when you're standing on a roof. A tree can fall on you when you're dancing in a park. You can get broken up with out of the blue, and chased by a crazy Rapture nut down a street, and locked in a Kmart with the power out. But all those things have already happened to us tonight. So how could things possibly get any worse? I'm not going to worry, because there's no point. And you shouldn't either. We're together. Best friends. The dynamic duo. Talulah. Tlu! We can do anything.” Lu wasn't sure if she was trying to convince Tiny or herself.

Tiny picked up a box of Band-Aids and examined the back.

“Lu,” Tiny said.

“What?”

“Do you notice anything different about me?” Lu squinted at her in the dark. It was hard to see Tiny. But then, it was hard to see anything. Was it the lightning? Was it making Tiny disappear?

Even worse, was it possible she hadn't even noticed until now?

Lu knew she should say something. But maybe it was the numbness or something. She was tired. She was sick of talking about how terrible everything was, and how they were all going to die. She was exhausted from just having so many feelings about it all. And she wanted to make Tiny say it out loud. She wanted her damn friend to stand up for herself, for once. Why did Lu always have to do it for her? Why was she always the one pushing Tiny to take the risks?

“Nope,” said Lu. She was being a jerk, but she didn't care. “Kinda hard to see anything in here though.”

Tiny put the box back onto the shelf and turned to face her. “Is there something going on between you and Will?” she blurted.

Lu threw a hard look in her general direction.

“No,” she said. “Nothing.”

“It seems like there is.”

“Well, there isn't,” Lu snapped. She would talk about it when she was ready. Which was probably going to be never.

There were lots of times she could have told Tiny about Will and what had happened between the two of them the summer before freshman year. But she didn't. She had never told anyone. She couldn't bring herself to say it out loud. And then after the summer, when she was ready to talk about it, there were too many other things to deal with. The last thing Tiny probably wanted to hear about was some stupid boy drama. Tiny had real problems to think about; they all did.

“Just drop it, Tiny. Please. You don't have to fix everything. You don't have to fix
me
.” She couldn't see Tiny's face, but in the dark silence, she knew she'd hit a nerve. “Don't take the Mrs. Potts thing literally.”

So maybe she was still in a bad mood about Owen.

“I'm not trying to fix you,” Tiny said. Lu had never heard her voice like that before—low but strong. “I just wish you'd tell me the truth for once.”

And just like that, Lu felt shitty again. She really was becoming a fortress of solitude. If she didn't do something to stop it, soon she wouldn't feel anything at all, no matter who she hurt in the process.

“I'm going to find a flashlight,” Tiny said. Did her voice sound hurt? Lu couldn't tell. “You can pick out your own Band-Aids.”

“Fine.” Lu picked up a pack of neon-yellow Band-Aids and stalked off toward the bathroom to dress her wounds.

And to protect herself from any more.

“You know,” Will said. He was sitting against the wall by the checkout counters while Nathaniel was inspecting the mechanism on the electric doors, looking for a way to pry them open manually. “Some deep subconscious part of me must have wanted to be Owen. But I don't think I really do.”

“You don't?” It was still pretty dark, but the light from outside was shining in through the glass, so they could kind of see. The cashiers were complaining loudly that it had been more than ten minutes and they just wanted to close up and go home. “There has to be a way to override this thing manually,” Nathaniel muttered.

“Nah,” Will said. “He takes himself too seriously. Plus”—he sniffed his T-shirt and made a face—“I think I'm allergic to cigarette smoke. My throat feels all itchy.”

Nathaniel pushed a button, but nothing happened.

“Lu would have broken up with him eventually. He just got to it first. I don't see her with someone like that.”

“Really.” Nathaniel stopped what he was doing and looked up. “Who do you see her with?”

“I don't know,” said Will. “Someone different.”

“Elaborate, please.”

“Someone who would be willing to chase after her. Stand up for her. Fight for her.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Someone like . . .”

“You?” Nathaniel said.

“Me?” said Will. He flipped Owen's hair casually out of his eyes. “Oh, I don't know.”

“Please.” Nathaniel walked over and sat down next to him. They leaned against the wall. “I never noticed it, until tonight. I guess because we haven't all been together since . . .” He didn't finish. “How long have you two been . . . you know?”

“Dude,” Will said. “Are you trying to have a heart-to-heart with me?”

“A what?”

“A heart-to-heart. It's what my mom used to call it when we had, you know, like, an important chat about feelings.”

“Okay,” said Nathaniel. “Yeah. I guess we're having a heart-to-heart. We're stuck in here until the power comes back on, so we might as well.” He paused. “I mean. We haven't had one in a long time, so.”

Will looked down at his hands.

“Yeah,” he said. “It's about time, right?”

“So. What's going on?”

“It started that last summer before high school. We were both doing summer classes at Hunter, and we started hanging out a lot just the two of us.”

“And?”

“And now I'm pretty sure she hates me.”

“How come you never told me?”

“Well, there was a lot going on that summer and fall. I didn't want to bother you with it.”

“Okay.” Nathaniel fidgeted with the laces of his hiking boots.

“Why are you even wearing hiking boots?” Will said. “There is literally, like, nowhere to hike within a hundred-mile radius.”

“They're comfortable,” Nathaniel said. “They have good traction. And . . .”

“And what?”

“No, it's dumb. Never mind.”

“It's okay. I'm not gonna make fun of you if that's what you're afraid of.”

Nathaniel untied and retied his laces. “They remind me that if I keep trekking forward, I'll get where I want to go, eventually.”

Will didn't say anything. That was a nice thing to think.

“It's stupid,” Nathaniel muttered. “It something Tobias used to say when he was in high school.”

“I like it.”

“Will,” said Nathaniel. “Are you okay? You're acting really weird. I know we haven't really hung out in a while, but you don't seem like yourself.”

“The thing is,” Will said slowly, “I don't even think I know who
myself
is.” He sighed. “I'm just freaked out by all this. The storm and the lightning and everything.” But that wasn't true. It was more than that, and he'd known it for a while now.

“We need to regroup,” Nathaniel said. “We need a game plan for getting downtown to school. That will make all of us feel better. If we figure out what's going on, then maybe we'll be able to fix it.”

“Yeah.” Will laughed. “See? You're good at leading us.”

“I don't know.”

“Stop being humble. You totally are.” Nathaniel's stomach rumbled, loudly.

“I'm hungry. I haven't eaten since the Cheez-Its earlier.”

“I
knew
you were eating Cheez-Its!”