He put his hands on the top of his car, taking in deep breaths as he tried to calm down. It sucked looking into a mirror and seeing who he really was. And while he’d been sneaking judgmental glances for about a year now, it felt as if he’d just stepped in front of a full-length mirror.
Garrett Lowry was a dick.
Yet, dick or not, he still wanted Blair. He knew that with even more certainty now than he had six years ago, when he first asked her out for pizza on a cold February night in Columbia, Missouri. Maybe he didn’t deserve her, but he wanted her nonetheless. He still had no idea what, if anything, to do about it. And then he did.
He pulled his phone out of his pocket and called his sister as he drove to his hotel, which was only a few blocks away.
“Garrett! Why are you calling me at this time of day?”
“Hey, Kelsey. Got time to talk?”
“Yeah, the baby’s down for a nap.”
“I’m stuck in Kansas City at Mealy Neily’s wedding.”
“I heard Nana Ruby suckered you into being a groomsman. I’m still not coming down until the rehearsal, so you’re on your own.” She laughed. “And I forgot about that nickname. I haven’t seen him in years. I take it that it still fits?”
“More than ever.”
“Well, I suspect you didn’t call to gossip about Neil, so what’s up?”
“You remember that woman I dated in law school?”
“Blair.” Her tone turned serious. “You haven’t mentioned her since you were a freaking idiot and broke up with her. What about her?”
“She’s here.”
“She’s in the wedding party?”
“She’s the bride.”
She was silent for several seconds. “Oh, Garrett. I’m so sorry.”
“I’m not sure I can do this, Kels.”
“Why?”
“Why?” he repeated. “Because she’s my ex.”
“Cut the bullshit, Garrett. You and I both know the reason you called me instead of one of your douchebag friends is because you want the truth. Just say it.”
Fear coursed through his blood. “Say what?”
“Bye.”
“Wait! Okay.” He took a breath. “I still love her. I’ve never stopped loving her. I was a fucking idiot to break up with her. I was an even bigger fucking idiot when I didn’t go to her on hands and knees years ago and apologize for being a fucking idiot.”
“Now we’re getting somewhere.” He heard the smile in her voice.
“Look, I’ve already had enough humiliation in one day without my sister adding to it.”
“What else has happened to my wittle baby bwother today?” she said in a baby voice. She had never been one to cut him slack.
“If I’m going to seek advice from you, then that last question will have to be stricken from the record. Otherwise I’ll never be able to take you seriously.”
She laughed.
“When I told my firm I had to come to K.C. for the wedding, they asked me to handle the depositions for one of our associates’ cases.”
“Oh, God. She’s the opposing counsel.”
He’d always known she was smart, which was one of the reasons he’d called her for advice. “And she’s fried my ass for two days now.”
“I bet she’s loving every minute of
that.
” She sounded pleased.
“Whose side are you on?” he asked.
“Yours, but you have to admit she’s completely entitled to hand you a slice or two of humble pie.”
He pulled into his hotel parking lot and put the car into park. “What should I do, Kels?”
“Take it like a man. Don’t be like Mealy Neily.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
She was quiet again. “Is she happy, Garrett? I know it’s difficult for either one of us to imagine someone being happy with him, but what if she is? Do you really want to take that from her too?”
“No, and I’ve already considered that. I have to go to this pre-wedding party they’re having for family and friends tomorrow night, so I was hoping to talk to her before then. Looks like we have another deposition in the morning. Maybe I can catch her after that.”
“You really want to wait that long?”
“I don’t know when to talk to her, Kels. I finally got her alone for a few minutes yesterday, and I completely froze up.”
“
Mr. Smooth
froze up? You’ve got it bad.”
“Look, I know I do,” he said, getting frustrated. “I’m asking for your advice on how to get her back.”
“Okay, okay.” Her tone was soft and soothing. “I’ll help you.”
“Thank you.”
“First you have to accept that just because you want her back doesn’t mean she feels the same. And since we are no longer ruled by caveman philosophy, you’ll have to deal with that.”
“I know, but I think she still cares about me.”
“What makes you say that?”
“I ran into her in a hotel bar in Phoenix on Monday night. We were both stranded there because of the weather. She was drunk . . . and she rarely got drunk when we were together. Only when she was really upset. In any case, they didn’t have a room for her, so I let her sleep in mine.”
“Oh, Garrett. You didn’t.” Disappointment was heavy in her voice.
“No. I did
not
. Do people really have that low of an opinion of me?”
“Let’s just say it’s a reputation earned.”
That was sobering. Especially coming from his big sister. He shook his head. “She fell asleep on the bed, and I told her I was going to spend the night at the airport. But she told me to stay. We slept fully clothed, but she pulled me close and said she missed me.”
“Oh, my God. Please tell me that you did
not
sleep on top of the covers.”
“Kelsey.”
“Haven’t you seen those news shows, Garrett? They’re covered in all kinds of gross germs and bacteria.”
“I’m pretty sure those are the same thing. And I need you to focus.”
“Okay.” She took a deep breath. “This is important. What were the exact words she used? For all you know she was drunk enough to have mistaken you for her dog.”
“That is more disgusting than your hotel comforter story.”
“You wouldn’t say that if you’d seen them use the black light.”
“Kelsey. I need you to focus. She said my name. She said, ‘I miss you, Garrett.’”
“Wow.” She was silent for several seconds. “I guess that means you can move to step two.”
“Which is?”
“Proving that you’re actually
not
lower than pond scum. The question is how do you pull off that deception?”
“Kelsey.”
“Okay, I’m kidding. Kind of. You have to know you’ve been a slut, Garrett. And honestly, it’s pretty gross.”
He sighed. “Yeah. I know.”
“Hey, admitting you have a problem is the first step, right?”
“Yeah. I guess.”
“Are you sure you still love this woman? That was five years ago, Gar-Bear. She’s changed. You’ve changed. And let’s not discount that she’s with Neil, whom you hate with a passion.”
“I don’t
hate
him. I just despise him.”
“Hate. Despise. Whatever. But you can’t ignore that Neil is marrying your old girlfriend. That is bound to prick your ego, jealousy—whatever you choose to call it. Don’t let that blind you.”
“I will admit that the thought of her with Neil . . .” His voice trailed off, and he sucked in a breath, not letting his mind go there. “You do have a valid point, but I’ve been thinking about her for a while now . . . long before I saw her in Phoenix, found out she was Neil’s fiancée, and was completely turned on by the way she eviscerated my client today.”
“I really hope that was a metaphor, or I’ll be forced to call the authorities, brother or not.”
“Kelsey.” He took a breath. “I’ve been pining for her since our breakup, and the last year has been even worse. Everyone around me is starting to settle down, which has made me realize that I want to share my life with someone too. So I’ve been serial dating—not screwing—women for the last year to try and find a partner who comes close to matching what I had with Blair, and it’s just not happening. I fucked up when I let her go, Kels, and I’m going to pay for it the rest of my life. I deserve it, but I want her anyway, and as long as she isn’t one hundred percent content with Neil, I’m going to try to get her back. Tell me what to do.”
“Did you actually use the word
pining?
”
He groaned. “Forget it.” His ego was bruised enough by the mere fact that he was asking his sister for help.
“Garrett, I’m sorry. I think you caught me off guard. That’s probably the most real thing I’ve heard you say in a long time.”
He paused, then said quietly, “I love her, Kels.”
“Then I’ll help you. But you have to do what I say.”
“Why do I think I’m going to regret this?”
“Because it’s going to be painful, but you want the girl, right?”
“More than anything.”
“Okay,” she sighed. “You two had fun when you were together, right? The weekend I spent with you in Columbia, you both laughed and joked around. Remind her of how much you enjoy each other’s company.”
He nodded. “Yeah, that’s good.”
“Prove that you’re trustworthy now. You screwed her over, so you have to show her that you won’t hurt her again. That one’s going to be tricky since you’re running out of time.”
His chest tightened as he realized just how little time he had left. “Anything else?”
“Show her how much you love her. You two were in love once. Maybe you weren’t the typical romantic couple, but it was obvious that you were crazy about her. There’s no way Neil can give her that. He’s too uptight.”
He swallowed a lump of fear. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to do all of this before Saturday.
“Good luck, Garrett,” she said with uncharacteristic seriousness. “I hope you can pull this off.”
“Thanks.” He needed all the help he could get.
Thirty minutes later, Garrett pulled into the parking lot of St. Luke’s Hospital. He’d already called his boss, who’d told him to go through with the new deposition. Later on, they would have a partner meeting to decide whether to keep Brian Norfolk on as a client. At the moment, he was ready to take his sister’s advice.
He’d decided it was time to take a different tactic with Neil and discuss the situation with his cousin like adults. And the sooner the better. If he was convinced Neil really loved Blair—and vice versa—he’d give up his impulsive claim to the ring, beg Nana Ruby to let him out of the wedding, and leave Blair alone. But so far his limited observance suggested otherwise. God help him for hoping he was right.
Garrett had no idea how to find his cousin, so he went to the information desk and asked for directions to his office. The woman looked up Neil’s office number and gave him instructions on how to find it. He took the elevator to the correct floor and found the office without having to go through a receptionist. He raised his hand to knock on the closed door but lowered it when he heard arguing inside.
“You have to choose!” a woman shouted.
“Keep your voice down, Layla,” Neil snarled. “Someone’s going to hear you.”
“We can’t keep doing this! You’re getting
married
, Neil!”
“Layla.” Neil’s voice was soft and soothing now. “It’s only for a little while, and then we can be together.”
“But you’re getting married,” she said, quieter this time.
“We’ll work it out, baby. I promise. Meet me at my apartment later tonight. I’ll text you when I leave the hospital.”
Fury ran through Garrett’s veins, followed fast by horror. Neil was cheating on Blair. It was her worst nightmare come true. Before Garrett could decide whether to bust the door down and punch his cousin out or duck away to reconsider the situation, the door opened.
A young woman with red, swollen eyes gasped as she nearly walked into him. Her hair was tangled, and she reached down to tug on the hem of her shirt. Neil stood behind her, his own hair disheveled, with a shocked look on his face.
“Garrett.” The word carried a mixture of horror and surprise. “What are you doing here?”
The woman tried to get past Garrett, but he continued to block the doorway. “Getting more answers to my questions than I expected.”
“Layla,” Neil said after sucking in a deep breath. “Thank you for bringing those lab reports.”
“My pleasure.” But her voice suggested she was close to sobbing.
Garrett considered keeping her here, but his beef was with his cousin, not with the nervous woman in front of him. He stepped to the side, and she bolted past him.
“She’s a nurse on one of the floors I work on,” Neil said.
Garrett fought every instinct within him and went into attorney mode.
No emotion. No reaction. Just let him spill his guts.
“She was bringing me some lab results.”
Garrett remained still.
“How long were you outside the door?”
“Long enough.”
“I know it looks bad, but we were discussing a patient.” When Garrett didn’t respond, he asked, “What are you doing here?”
“Catching you cheating on Blair.” He was surprised he sounded so calm. So rational.
Neil tried to look indignant, but did a very poor job of it. “How could you think that?”
“Don’t insult me, Neil.” His words carried the first note of disgust he’d betrayed.
“I don’t know what—”
“Cut the shit.” He looked over his shoulder at the hospital personnel hurrying down the hall, then back at his cousin. “Would you like to have this conversation out here, or in your office with the door closed? What would happen to your sterling reputation if word got out that you plan to get married on Saturday
and
keep your girlfriend?”
Two nurses lifted their eyebrows and glanced at them as they passed.
Neil swallowed, his face turning pale. “Let’s go inside and close the door.” But fear filled his eyes as he ducked into his office. Neil was scared of him . . . or maybe scared of what the others would think of him if they knew the truth.
Good. He should be.
Garrett walked in and shut the door. Neil backed up, moving behind his desk without ever turning away from his cousin. “What difference does it make to you what I do?”
“I couldn’t give a flying fuck what you do, but this affects Blair.”
“
Blair?
Why would you care about Blair? You have no reason to care about her.” Neil bumped into the bookshelf behind him and jumped with fright.